Puns and Profanity

[fuckyeahchinesegarden]

apples trees in winter snow

[inber]

GOOD for HER

[paxamericana]

[majortomiscominghome]

[greysfields]

complicated relationships with your parents are like. you cut up fruit and bring it to my room without me asking. i can't remember the last time you told me that you were proud of me. you told me i wasn't good enough for you but i'm not even good enough for myself. your hugs feel like coming home. i can't tell you anything that happens in my life. i doubt myself every day because of something you said to me when i was eight. would you like to hear about my day? please don't ask me about my day. i miss you even though you're in the next room. i wish we didn't live together. i've never loved or resented anyone as much as i've loved and resented you. are you okay? are we okay? are we ever going to be okay?

[ousia-poetica]

We are energy capable of transforming our life and that of others. Art by thekeymonster

[orpheusdrinkinga40inadeathbasket]

[tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva]

Job interviews

[cishetlessfashion]

[catvampire]

[friendly-neighborhood-patriarch]

terrifying and incomprehensible to the human mind?

[hzs-modblog]

[sad-boy-hank]

be not afraid

[likeheaven]

i can’t breathe

[menthaaquatica]

[carnivalseb]

broke: termites are Catholic bespoke: the clergy eats wood

[womenwearingsuitsandblazers]

[brinty]

[youstoopidbitch]

[funnytwittertweets]

[shelly-johnson]

Missy Peregrym as Haley Graham in Stick It (2006)

[copperbadge]

I’m working on an audio transcript using voice recognition technology, and this gentleman has a very nice accent, but when he says “got” the word is often noted down as “God”.

We don’t know what God tested and what God registered as true or untrue. 

We don’t know what God entered into the code since the last time we tested. 

We don’t know what God ticketed as an issue and what just God ignored.

Now we know what God changed, but we don’t have a record of what God approved. 

[jumpingjacktrash]

“We don’t know what God ticketed as an issue and what just God ignored.“

[animatedamerican]

voice recognition theology

[fatehbaz]

Income and tree canopies: In US cities, access to clean air, cooler air, shade, and greenery segregated by income.

[dancefloors]

I'm BEGGING artists to never reveal who their muses are. never have I once found out who a song was about and then had the quality of my life improved. it's always you listen to some deeply emotional richard siken prose love song and then it's about some guy who looks like wile e. coyote and has been charged with 4 counts of public urination. keep it to yourself PLEASE. GOD PLEASE.

[rotgospels]

is my human suffering sexy enough for you, God? is it getting you off king