I know this is probably just a trauma response to all of the pain and suffering the trans community is facing at this current moment. I know you're upset at the gendered folk who seem to have the power to take away your rights, to make sure you are seen as a monster, and you hate those with the power to speak over your entire network..
But trans men, as a whole, don't hold that power to significantly subjugate trans women in a way where trans men benefit from it without undoing themselves as men.
American white trans men most likely hold the ability (if given) to suppress other trans people if he himself is not burdened by his transness. But he is. Even if he passes, he is. Even if he is in a straight relationship, he is. Even if he is the most transsexual of them all, he won't be killed a man or a queer but instead branded as a woman, a female, a poor innocent baby, a hysterical nutcase.
Your view point is intrinsically focusing on the power of the American trans man and not the trans man from a country where he is forced into womanhood. Not the trans man who suffers FGM immediately upon reaching an age of maturity/being married. Not the trans men who face a higher risk of HIV than other gendered people. Not the trans man who is undermined in another country you haven't been paying attention to. Because why would you?
they cry about "lack of representation" and the representation is the eu talking about banning trans women from everything, or epstein grooming trans women, or the us government declaring that trans women will always go to mens prisons, or the Olympics banning all trans women.
What trans men are "crying" about is the fact that many of them can't find housing without being assaulted, that their binders and their hormones have been restricted and oftentimes can be withheld out of nowhere, that their bodies are often seen as mutilations and too mature, that they are on lists for people using controlled substances, that they are seen as detransitioners more than they are seen as real men, and that their non-hegemonic masculinity is mocked by even the trans community (the same community that claims that hegemonic masculinity is the evil plight against them). There is a reason that most of the legislation keeps bringing up "protecting our women", because conservatives don't just think of cis women, they think of trans men and transmasc people as inherent detrans confused cis girls who need to be saved from "transgenderism". Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria proved to trans men what the world thinks about them as a whole. A "contagion", a disease. A girl with "penis envy".
If trans men sold out trans women like cis men do, trans men don't remain men in that exchange. That exchange is entirely about cis men's power over trans men and the forceful detransition of transmasculine people by the hands of cis people. Trans men don't get to suddenly get brownie points if they hold power, they are just seen as another "Woman to Protect" from the trannies by cis people. Most trans men don't do this, most trans men don't have the power to do this. Most trans men I know personally can't afford housing or stable employment.
they try to play the white woman "i cant hurt people im just a baby" while also benefitting from the patriarchy, they actively degender themselves just to try to benefit from both sides. they only talk about racialized people or intersex people when trying to belittle and target trans women.
For the first point, I have seen trans women do this exact same thing. They use their womanhood as a shield to deflect criticism, oftentimes when she is being intersexist (calling herself the H-slur) or outright exorsexist (saying Theyfab). Not all trans women do this, because trans woman is not a monolith, but it is notable that many of them that do this are within spaces that reward that behavior the same way transmisogynistic trans men reward each other in their own spaces. Nothing is different, both hold horrible beliefs that stem from the gratification of being more "tranny" and less "palatable" than the other.
Trans people as a whole do not benefit from the patriarchy if they've been assigned forcefully and are punished by the government for asking for gender-affirming care. Trans men aren't given access to HRT and transitioning materials, they have to work a 9-5 (or do sex work) to obtain it, and if they stop working, they stop getting hormones. White cis men in power are not funding trans men as if they are an organization to be up kept as part of harming women. They want to detransition and mercy kill trans men.
An archive for instances of violence associated with anti-transmasculinity.
Marginalized men die. And they die at higher rates than non-marginalized men do. Men are oppressed based on their intersections of oppressions that come with their identities and realities. A black man is oppressed not because of his cis manhood but because of how that intersects with his blackness. A trans man is oppressed because of his trans manhood and how it aligns with his position in society + other facets.
You cannot remove the trans part of trans man.