Untitled document

tasteless hack of a blog.

[thedragonlancechronicles]

Can't you see that I am knitting?!

[thedragonlancechronicles]

If money is a made up concept and the cost of living is so high then why can't we change the value of money so that it lowers the cost of living?

I'm as high as the cost of living right now.

So anyway here is my latest addition to my trendmasters starcastle collection

[thedragonlancechronicles]

I swear centrelink cuts your payment off so you will go rip your shirt off in their office or listen to their hold music for several hours and then finally you get to speak to Carla who goes oops we are sorry that you haven't eaten in 3 days I just clicked a button and your payment is restored thanks for giving us all your energy today is there anything else we can assist you with?

Then an optional survey to document how frustrated the service has made you on a scale of one to ten.

They are powered by the customer's stress levels and if they aren't getting enough energy to the centrelink thoughtform then it will cease to exist as an egregore.

[thedragonlancechronicles]

Time to take an infodump

Mushrooms increase their vitamin D production when exposed to UV light. Putting mushrooms out in the sun for an hour either sliced or gill-side up increases their vitamin D content

[thedragonlancechronicles]

A conversation with a client-

A nurse.

Young. Works in paediatric oncology.

Tired beyond any human measure.

For her it was 'fun scrub' friday so she was wearing brightly coloured ones.

She has a kind energy.

Although there was a heavy weight still on her shoulders even after removing her backpack.

Lying on the massage table in a supine position, she looks dissociated slightly as she stares toward the 'Om' banner upon the wall.

A symbol of inner peace.

"There are so many children each year coming in with a cancer diagnosis. Over a hundred already this year have been admitted."

"It's too much."

She paused pensively.

"It is too many."

She sighs deeply, and shuts her eyes as a precleansing oil is applied to her skin.

I read in the news that 'fun scrub friday' is going to be banned.

Our nurses and healthcare practitioners carry the weight of the world on their shoulders.

They are caring for our loved ones while understaffed, overworked, and underpaid.

They are tired.

But they wear a bright coloured heart despite there being too much dark.

Let them wear some hope.

[thedragonlancechronicles]

You do not pass go!

You do not collect two hundred dollars!

[thedragonlancechronicles]

🎶 You are only mad at me

Because you bought

A Tesla

And it has been giving you headaches

Ohh it has been giving you headaaaaaches

Don't buy the Tesla

It will give you headaches 🎶

[thedragonlancechronicles]

Stop silent treatmenting me, I have literally shat your kids out

[thedragonlancechronicles]

Ode to my closeted twink

You were twirling his rats tail briefly

The look of affectionate familiarity in your gaze as your eyes met

Such an intimate moment

You looked behind you

All around you

You thought nobody saw

And that is when I knew

What I always knew

I did not know.. if you knew

But I do remember when you would come into the local gay bar a decade ago

You don't remember me

You never left by yourself

Cody tried to take you home one night while he was wearing my palm print midi skirt and crop top

He was rejected

It's 2026 and your parents are old enough that you could probably tell them. They already know though like I know. I can bet they still love you anyway

Go get your man!

P.s I also have Grindr too and you matched with my catfish I'M SORRY I STOOD YOU UP MY FAKE GAY MAN NAME WAS BEN

[thedragonlancechronicles]

“And yet, people still turn to Jesus. You will notice though that the kind of people who turn to Jesus tend to be the sort of people who haven’t done that well with everybody else.”

— Dylan Moran

[thedragonlancechronicles]

People who are doing rejuran you are becoming a salmon phenotype STOPPP

You look like fishies and your skin looks scaly

Your gene expression is now literally that of a salmon

It's giving salmon

[thedragonlancechronicles]

Good afternoon,

My name is Eugene, and I have a script to say to you.

I am just a number.

As are you.

Hello One Three Five Six Nine Zero, how are you?

I am informing you that the form can easily be uploaded online, please complete it by yesterday so you may eat, drink, and breathe.

Your life is being recorded for quality, and control purposes.

You may opt out of this when we hope you die (at 65).

It says here on the human number database that you are a quadriplegic but we would still require you to prove this by filling in this form which you can easily complete with your hand.

If you don't have a hand then we are sorry we cannot assist you but we will still record your life for compliance.

If it is found that you have eaten or breathed in the last two years you will have to switch over to our jobstopper program.

This program will allow you to search for work you cannot possibly do, and if you do not get the work you cannot possibly do, then you will not be able to eat or breathe.

Your privacy is our privilege. Please upload all pictures, fingerprints, and personal details of your children so that we may remove any privacy they may still have, and to sell this data if we need to, for quality purposes.

We will also brand your children with their assigned numbers as we move toward our draconian digital worldwide totalitarianism model of existence.

Please be advised that there is a notifiable cough at the moment, it is very dangerous because we said it is, and you will be silenced or discredited if you do anything suggesting it is not dangerous.

Please be fearful of it, and of other people.

We want the elderly, and babies to cover their mouths and breathe in their own carbon dioxide as well as have an injection of an untested substance.

If you do not comply you will be jailed, pay currency, and not allowed to be in any public space.

You will also not be allowed to work or eat or breathe.

Make sure you have a limited form of human connection for one year, and preferably develop psychosis. This cures us enforcing that the cough is dangerous.

Voting is compulsory, you can lose your right to live if you do not comply.

Voters may choose from 7 parties. These parties are named beetle1 beetle2 beetle3 and chinesebeetle4. The rest are: RacistOne party for hate crimes , the party for bananas grown in hydroponics, and the eugenics party. They all have the same policies worded differently and backwards.

We put something in your food so you won't cost us as much over the long term.

Can you feel the plastic in your body?

Scan the QR code on your face to access fresh drinking water. The system regularly malfunctions if dissent is detected.

We generate currency from your disease.

There is no cure for generating currency from your disease.

My name is Eugene I am a number as are you.

Thankyou for taking my call

[thedragonlancechronicles]

I'm getting the wooples (brain zaps)

[thedragonlancechronicles]

In response to the recent attacks

You can no longer say the words

[thedragonlancechronicles]

My dog is extra hyperactive when there is g4 solarstorm

[thedragonlancechronicles]

I have learnt that if I do a little dance for the lady at the petrol station she will give me an expired chocolate bar for free

I feel like a bonobo ape discovering tools

[thedragonlancechronicles]

I'm mentally stable and content in life

I have so many things in life to look forward to

Life is beautiful