The Duct Tape Project

A project about sexual assault awareness. Duct Tape over the mouth symbolizes the silence around sexual assault. var _gaq = _gaq || []; _gaq.push(['_setAccount', 'UA-23229949-2']); _gaq.push(['_trackPageview']); (function() { var ga = document.createElement('script'); ga.type = 'text/javascript'; ga.async = true; ga.src = ('https:' == document.location.protocol ? 'https://ssl' : 'http://www') + '.google-analytics.com/ga.js'; var s = document.getElementsByTagName('script')[0]; s.parentNode.insertBefore(ga, s); })();

[theducttapeproject]

My boyfriend of 3 years (now ex) would rape me every time I was at his house. I used to have a problem with pills which he hated and one time while he was raping me he said "the more pills you take the more I'll rape you and maybe then you'll learn" but it didn't matter if I took the pills or not he would still do it. Thankfully I was able to break up with him and stop taking pills.

So sorry that happened to you! That can be very difficult to break up with someone, even an abuser. You’re very brave for doing so, and congratulations for quitting the pills! Keep fighting!

[theducttapeproject]

My mom used to run a daycare. I was between the ages of 5 and 7 when two of her kids (the babysitees) both older than me by 4 years decided to touch me/ have me touch them. I blocked out the memories for about 10 years. I am a survivor. I am healing.

So sorry that happened to you. You are indeed a Survivor! Thank you for sharing!

[theducttapeproject]

This is personal but I need advice and don't wanna feel like this. I am so confused I feel like it was all my fault. I wish I could go back and be a strong enough person to stand up for myself and not of let it happen. Even when I said no I was still asked a million times like no wasn't an option and I was nervous and nervous-laughing andsweating and he showed that he did nothing wrong.

No matter what, being assaulted is never your fault. It goes against the very definition of it. You didn't "let" it happen. Your perpetrator knew exactly what he was doing, and knew what you said. No WASN'T an option because he was set on assaulting you. That is what is wrong. He didn't care about your feelings or respect you. That is a fault of his, and not yours. Confusion is completely normal, but you're never to blame, and you're not alone. 

[theducttapeproject]

The Duct Tape Project "Friend of Survivor"

[theducttapeproject]

The Duct Tape Project "Friend of Survivor"

[theducttapeproject]

The Duct Tape Project Survivor "It doesn't matter who you told, who it was, what you did, or when it happened: If you identify yourself as a survivor, you are a survivor."

[theducttapeproject]

The Duct Tape Project "Friend of Survivors"

[theducttapeproject]

To that other anon: technically that was rape. You said his fingers were inside you, and that's penetration.

[theducttapeproject]

I was out walking one night and a guy grabbed me from behind, swung me around and put his fingers in me. I punched him and ran. I didn't even move for like 10 seconds. I keep having flashbacks where its like I can feel him on me again and I'm like terrified of the dark. Is this sexual assault? Am I just overreacting by being freaked out?

Trigger Warning: sexual assault

I put that trigger there because this IS sexual assault. You are certainly not overreacting. Someone touched you without your consent. Even the fact that you’re having flashbacks and aversions because of it is a key clue to the fact that you were assaulted. I hope you are able to reach out for support to friends, family, or a counselor. You didn’t deserve to have this happen to you.

[theducttapeproject]

I've lost count on how many guys have assaulted me.  I can't remember all of the times anymore or all of the guys.

[theducttapeproject]

Uh, sorry, I was the last asker, the one with the co-worker, if that's too violent I wouldn't want you to bother posting it. It just kills me every day I see this man and I can't find another job because the economy is horrible.

No, it wasn’t too violent. Like I said, revenge fantasies are normal. I do hope that one of you is able to move to a different job soon. Again, please stay safe, not just physically, but emotionally as well.

[theducttapeproject]

this breaks my heart but thank you for what you are doing. I wanted, not to kill my rapist, but to cut his tongue out for the silence I was forced into. If people say we aren't allowed revenge fantasies, fuck them. I never went to the police, he works at my place of work now. It's very difficult.

Fantasizing about revenge is a completely normal reaction. There is absolutely nothing wrong with it. I’m sorry that you have to see him all the time. I hope that you are able to reach out for support at your work place to at least have one person that knows and can help you, even if it’s just to vent. Please stay safe. I hope that you are able to be in an environment soon where you don’t have to see or interact with him. 

[theducttapeproject]

I was molested by my uncle and my grandfather from age 3 to age 7. I didn't tell anyone until I turned 14 and, even with the therapy, I still feel guilty and ashamed and dirty. I've been having so many memories resurfacing lately and I always fall in a depression when I do. I isolate myself or I suddenly become angry and snap at everyone. I don't know what to do anymore, especially when the family I'm closest to doesn't believe me and thinks I'm making everything up for attention...

Reaching out is the best way to receive help. I’m sorry that your family isn’t being supportive. Keep trying to reach out to family, friends, parents of friends, etc until you find the support that you deserve. People are ignorant and don’t want to believe what they don’t want to be true. Try reaching out to a counselor. They can be a tremendous help and will support you no matter what.

[theducttapeproject]

When I was around eleven years old, my brother's 14-15 year old friend came into my bedroom and watched me sleep. He would rub the inside of my thigh (I woke up because I felt something cold on my thigh). He did this two times, and once when I was awake and my brother left the room. I don't really know what to call this. I feel like I can better cope with it, which I haven't been doing very well, if I knew what to call it.

Trigger Warning: Sexual assault

You see that trigger warning I put on this post? That’s what it is. If someone is sleeping, they are unable to consent. If anything makes you uncomfortable and like you need to cope, then it’s a violation.

[theducttapeproject]

My best friend of five years raped me in the spring semester. I put myself in that position but said no to certain things. But he did them anyway. Investigation was dropped due to lack of sufficient evidence. He keeps his job, his life, and his girlfriend, who knows and hates me, and I'm left with depression and the guilt that even though he did what he did, I put myself there and was too scared to say anything, much less no.

It wasn’t your fault. If there were things that you didn’t want to happen, and he did them anyway, that’s on him. You have nothing to feel guilty about. You’re very brave to talk about it. 

[theducttapeproject]

The Duct Tape Project Survivor, Husband of Survivor

"I'm not only a survivor, but I am a fighter. It takes a special kind of man to partner up with me and I found him. I thank God every day for putting Lee in my life. He is gentle and kind and loves me with all his heart."

[theducttapeproject]

The Duct Tape Project Survivor