love me or hate me, its still an obsession

Sebastian Smythe. 21. Literateur. Say Hello, you know you want to. Indie rp blog. no gifs belong to me unless otherwise stated.

[theeldestsmythe]

I'm Either Gone In An Instant Or Here To The Bitter End.

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

Cameron watched as the ring slid down his finger, Sebastian’s grip a little tight as if he was scared to let this go. “I love you too," Cameron replied, sniffling to himself. Cam saw the tears in Sebastian’s eyes and felt his heart thud hard; he’d never seen Sebastian so emotional, not like this. He didn’t acknowledge it. It was hard to acknowledge anything right now — he’d suddenly gone from being in some form of unofficial ‘friends with benefits’ kind of relationship to… Fiances. He let another tear fall as Sebastian spoke, instantly disagreeing with ‘you deserve better than me’. He disagreed completely.  "Why’re you thanking me?" he whispered with a sniffle, smiling and laughing breathily. “I… I can’t believe you—" he paused, covering his mouth and taking a deep breath, laughing softly as he wiped his tears away before looking at the ring. “I can’t believe you want to marry me… I-I wasn’t expecting that… Not one bit." He smiled and pursed his lips with a slight nod. “I love you so much, Sebastian. I-I know I’m not… Perfect and I’m not as handsome or intelligent as others you’ve been with but, I’m too selfish to let that slip…" He looked at the ring and then smiled lovingly to Sebastian, his eyes glistening from tears, “I guess it’s permanent now, huh?"

[theeldestsmythe]

[TIMEJUMP BC I CAN]

Sebastian turned his attention from the road to Cam, who had been staring pretty constantly at his phone for the last few moments, "I can tell he's upsetting you." He said softly, not needing to know who Cam was texting, to know who Cam was texting. He slipped the phone gently from Cam's hand, tucking it into his own pocket, "Don't let him ruin this right now." He whispered as he brought his lips against Cam's, "He thinks i'm going to hurt you. From the moment I moved here and you two became friends again, he's thought I was going to hurt someone. Everyone thought I was. I'm gonna try not to though." One of his hands gripped Cam's thigh, the other the side of his face so he could look at him properly.

"I can't promise you that I'm going to be exactly what you need. But I can promise you that I'll try." He inhaled sharply, holding back emotions, "I've never been very good at promises anyway, but I can try."

[theeldestsmythe]

I'm Either Gone In An Instant Or Here To The Bitter End.

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

Cameron didn’t realise what was going on at first, even when Sebastian knelt down on one knee — it was only when Sebastian mentioned that he was going to ask something that it clicked, he was proposing. Cam bit his inner cheek just to check that this wasn’t a dream; Sebastian Smythe was proposing to him. Above everything else, marriage was the one thing Cameron thought he’d never be able to have, he hadn’t expected it, in fact he was so sure that marriage would be something no one would want with him. Yet here Sebastian was, on one knee. Cameron’s lips feel open in shock, his eyes sparkling as he listened. He felt like he could’ve stopped breathing there and then. It was confusing, they hadn’t really dated, or at least, they dated without the label and all of a sudden they’d taken this huge leap. Cameron didn’t know what to say, and then he heard it. "Will you marry me?" He exhaled, blinking with surprise, tears starting to well up as he looked at their hands and then to Sebastian’s face. He was serious about this. He was really serious and he wanted Cameron, not anyone else. “Yes," he said softly, “Y-yeah." His breath was shaking, he almost sounded timid but it was the shock causing his vocals to tremble, his eyes watering once again as a stray tear rolled down his pale cheek, a hand covering his mouth as he smiled behind it with a nod. “Of course I will."

[theeldestsmythe]

Sebastian had done this once, only it hadn't been like this. When he'd begrudgingly asked Gillian to marry him, it had been more along the lines of 'I have no choice, please just do this and we can fuck other people I don't care but he's making me.' With Cam it was heartfelt, meaningful, words he'd never thought he'd say or feel to anyone. And he felt the words as he rolled off his tongue. It was a quote from poetry he knew so well or French literature that he'd memorized years ago. What he'd said was nothing more than the words written on his heart, etched by the pen that was Cameron Hummel, spewed out of his mouth clumsily and for the whole world, but especially Cam, to judge. And he'd said yes. Yes. Oui. Ja. Si. Cam had agreed to marry him. Sebastian just stared as he reached for the ring in his pocket.

Sebastian would never admit to the quiver in his hand as he slid the ring onto Cam's hand, as he stood and pulled Cam's hand off of his mouth so he could bring their lips together in a firm kiss. "I love you, Cameron." He whispered, "And I'm going to do my best to be what you need." He said, lips still against Cam's, "For as long as you'll let me." He smiled and pulled back, eyes shining with tears he wouldn't shed, wiping the tear from Cam's cheek, "You deserve better than me." He said, voice still quiet as he stared at the man, "But I'm all I have to give you. So than you." He brought Cam's left hand up to his mouth and kissed the ring, "Thank you." He said again, before returning to his seat.

[theeldestsmythe]

I'm Either Gone In An Instant Or Here To The Bitter End.

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

Cameron was just about to take a sip if his wine when Sebastian mentioned that he wanted him to be a part of his world. He raised the glass to his lips and took a sip, his eyes cast on Sebastian the whole time, even when he put his drink down. “You… You know I want that too, right?" he asked quietly, his eyes looking rather confident in his words, full of truth and honestly and sheer love for the man sat opposite him. “I know we’ve been through a lot, and maybe I sound crazy but… We work. We’re like, Clark and Lois, we’re broken and fragile in some ways but we’ll mend and fix each other as best as we can." Cameron’s own words shocked him just a little, but he nodded, sure of what he was saying. “Do you ever think about how crazy this is? You and I?" he smiled. “N-Not in a bad way, but… I mean you were with both of my brothers at some point. You’ve been with others and for you to just— say that I’m the one who’s something special to you, it… I-It means a lot, Sebastian." There was so much more that Cameron could’ve said then, but he new that making this soppy could turn two ways; them leaving early for sex or Sebastian becoming uninterested. Right now, Cameron wanted to be there in that moment. 

[theeldestsmythe]

Sebastian stopped when he realized what Cam was saying, he stopped everything. He just stared, let him gush, let him talk, "I do realize how crazy it is." He said softly, "I realize a lot of things you probably don't realize I do." He moved out of his chair, dropping to the ground on one knee, staring up at  Cam, "You probably already know what I'm going to ask, and I was going to wait til after we'd eaten, but I know how nervous you get so this is probably better." He smiled and reached for Cam's hand, "I know we've been through a lot and I haven't always treated you the way you're supposed to be or deserve to be treated. I don't like to be a boyfriend, I don't do well with relationships in general, but you mean so much more to me than I could ever imagine. You're the person I want to spend the rest of my life with, and I know this hasn't been the longest relationship or the healthiest but we can only improve from here. I love you, Cameron Hummel, will you marry me?" He stared at Cam, knowing he had the power to crush him with a single word.

[theeldestsmythe]

I'm Either Gone In An Instant Or Here To The Bitter End.

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

Cameron already knew that Sebastian had gone all out just when he entered the restaurant. It was weird being with someone who had money — a lot of it. Cameron was used to having to eat less towards the end of the month whilst waiting for a pay check. “Oh, wow," he whispered, looking at the menu. This was waaay out of his league for sure. “Are you sure? It looks—" Before he could even finished he noticed the look in Sebastian’s eyes and smiled softly, shyly (he didn’t know why he felt shy). Deciding to play it safe, Cameron ordered a pasta dish, laughing to himself as he didn’t really understand half of the menu. “You’re spoiling me," he smiled. “If only I had just as much money so I could return the favor."

[theeldestsmythe]

Sebastian smirked, "I promise, it's nothing I can't afford." He leaned forward, careful not to rest his elbows on the table, "And you deserve to be spoiled. For all the hell I put you through, you deserve to be taken out and pampered." He smirked and sipped at the wine, humming at the flavour, as good as he'd expected, for the price he'd paid for it. "I know sometimes it must feel like I don't want this, but it's really important that I make you see that I do. So I spoil you." He shrugged, "Because I want you to be a part of my world, Cameron, and this is very much my world."

[theeldestsmythe]

I'm Either Gone In An Instant Or Here To The Bitter End.

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

"Your day sounds more eventful that mine," he smiled to himself, leaning over to press a soft, gentle kiss to Sebastian’s lips. “For the record, you didn’t have to do this tonight. Pizza would’ve been fine—" he paused, kissing Seb’s neck again, “but I’m not complaining. You always look lovely in a suit." He blushed to himself and looked into Sebastian’s eyes lovingly, not really knowing how he ever got so lucky with this. “I love you," Cameron said softly, a slight corner of his lips turning into a smile, knowing that it was a hit and miss comment with Sebastian. Most times, he wouldn’t even reply, other times, he would; but it was never straight forward. He blinked to himself as he noticed the car slow down and smoothed out the front of his suit, knowing they’d probably arrived.

[theeldestsmythe]

Sebastian smirked, "I know I look good in a suit." He winked and leaned to brush his lips quickly against Cam's, trying to give him passion in love in a kiss instead of words, afraid of what he'd say if he opened his mouth, He got out first, helping Cam out and holding him tight against his side. "Reservations for Smythe." He said, eyes bright and voice confident as the maitre'd lead them back to a private corner, "The wine, please." He said as he pulled out Cam's chair, pushing it in for him and leaning down once more to kiss his lips. It was the kind of restaurant that didn't have prices on the menu, but Sebastian didn't care, he wanted the very best for Cam, "Order whatever you'd like, sweetheart." He smiled as the waiter poured the wine and he watched Cam intently.

[theeldestsmythe]

I'm Either Gone In An Instant Or Here To The Bitter End.

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

Cameron sat down in the car and shifted along the back seat and waited for his partner to sit down. He relaxed into the seat and watched affectionately as he felt Sebastian’s hand on his thigh, his eyes then moving to the beautiful and bright optics staring back at him. He blinked innocently, his lips parting into a slight shy smile. Sometimes, Cameron couldn’t believe that Sebastian would go out of his way like this — not for someone like himself, anyway. Cameron wasn’t as smart or as beautiful as his brothers. It confused him on a high level. He felt his chest warm with butterflies overtaking pretty much every breath he took. Sebastian really did care.  "You didn’t have to do that," he whispered, watching as the Literature student kissed his fingers. If Cameron was capable, he would’ve melted there and then. He was literally putty in Sebastian’s fingers — this was beyond perfect and he had no clue why this was all happening. “My day? Not much happened, I suppose," he began with a smile, linking his hand with Sebastian’s, gazing at their hands as he spoke. “I spoke with my Dad about work, went to see him for a few hours and then came home. I— attempted a work out—" he hesitated on that part, knowing he shouldn’t have, “but I stopped when I felt pain. Then I took a shower and read for a while, then you came home and told me to put this suit on and well, now I’m here." He blushed to himself and looked up at Sebastian, pecking his cheek as a shy thank you. “How was yours, handsome?"

[theeldestsmythe]

Sebastian winced at the mention of Cam doing a workout, "You shouldn't have done that while I was out of the house, Cam." He playfully rolled his eyes to soften the chastising tone. "I'm glad you stopped though. And that reason right there is why I called the doctor. You should be able to work out, basic things, without being in pain." He kissed Cam's fingers and then dropped his hand, moving it to stroke at the curve of his cheek and the hard edge of his cheekbone, "We're gonna get you fixed up in no time. And then if you insist I suppose you could go back to work for your dad, though I fully support the concept of him hiring someone else so you don't have to go back to work and can focus on writing." He kissed the tip of Cam's nose and relaxed back against the seat bench.

"I had a fairly boring day. Took care of some things for school, signing the final papers on my apartment and such. I got confirmation of the divorce being final as well, which is good news I was going to share with you." He thought for a moment, trying to come up with things he could tell Cam about his day that wouldn't ruin the surprise that he hoped Cam would take well, "Went to buy the suits, called to make the reservation and order a special bottle of wine for the night. Called for the car, visited my brothers. Typical things." He decided not to mention his fight with Eli, or the fact that he hadn't had the guts to ask Burt Hummel yet, needing to know that it was something Cam wanted before he did anything else.

[theeldestsmythe]

I'm Either Gone In An Instant Or Here To The Bitter End.

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

Cameron didn’t really understand what was going on, but it wasn’t the first time that he and Sebastian had dressed up to go out, therefore, Cameron didn’t have a problem. In fact, the idea of Sebastian in a suit was more than enough to keep him happy. “Jeez, how much did you pay for this?" he whispered to himself, smoothing down the blazer as he’d finished fastening the buttons, the suit fitting perfectly, looking tight yet it was snug on him. There were so many things that Cameron didn’t understand — nights like this were one of them. He was special to Sebastian, sure, but they weren’t boyfriends. They were something, but they weren’t official. Cameron didn’t complain though, in his opinion, the more Sebastian he could take, he’d do it without thinking twice. He was in love with him.  "H-Hey," he said shyly, exiting his room with a slight limp that was probably only noticeable to Sebastian. As Sebastian turned to face him, Cameron felt his heart almost stop for a moment’; butterflies hitting his chest like never before. Before he had a chance to speak, he was brought into a kiss; something Cameron would never say no to, or even object to. In fact, sometimes it almost felt unreal that they would even kiss; Cameron could still remember when Seb wouldn’t even dare to kiss him. “You like it? I don’t look messy in it?" he asked softly, fixing his tie and his collar before hugging Sebastian for a moment, inhaling his scent (he felt a little clingy). “Where the hell are we going, anyway? You’re being all secretive tonight. The last time we dressed like this we went to Sawyer’s art gallery."

[theeldestsmythe]

Sebastian wrapped his arms around Cam's waist, "We're going to the city. Key West. I ordered a car. Decided that you deserved a nice night out." He smiled at Cam and then brought their lips together again, "Especially since, y'know you're feeling good enough to maybe go back to work. Surely you feel well enough for a night out." He kissed the side of Cam's head as he took his hand, leading him out to the car that was waiting for them, "Besides, I spend so much of our time out driving I never really get to enjoy being around you." He opened the car door for Cam, helping him in and settling onto the seat next to him, hand stroking up and down his once-injured thigh,

"I called the doctor friend by the way." He murmured, mesmerized by Cam's eyes and his face and his everything, "She agreed to come take a look, see if there was anything more she can do, and see if you could be cleared for sports again." He took one of Cam's hands, kissing each finger separately, "Anything that happens is your call but the least I can do is help you as much as I can, to get you back to where you were before the accident." He smirked again, "How was your day?"

[theeldestsmythe]

Seb/Eli

Sebastian: I'm asking him to marry me

Elijah: I'm sorry. What?

Sebastian: I'm going to ask Cam to marry me.

Elijah: You won't even call him your fucking boyfriend and you want him to marry you?

Sebastian: Well yeah, that's kind of the idea.

Elijah: What the fuck, Sebastian? What kind of games are you playing with him?

Sebastian: I'm not playing any games, but thanks for the vote of confidence?

Elijah: You're..ugh....you're gonna hurt him. That's all you know how to do, hurt him.

Sebastian: I never meant to hurt him.

Elijah: Somehow he believes that garbage. Just...don't fuck with him, okay? I don't know how many more times I can put him back together.

Sebastian: I'm not gonna hurt him, Elijah.

Elijah: Don't believe you this time either.

[methaphizika]

[theeldestsmythe]

I'm Either Gone In An Instant Or Here To The Bitter End.

Sebastian didn't really know what he was doing, or that it was a good idea, but there was a gold ring burning a hole in his suitjacket pocket. He was going to ask Cam to marry him, for better or worse, and see what he'd say. It was dumb. It was probably the dumbest thing Sebastian had ever done. Cam probably hated him, would probably say no and laugh in his face because Sebastian was horrible and that was what Sebastian deserved but he had to ask, had to know, because no one had ever felt like Cam felt. No one had ever meant what Cam meant to him, and if he was going to do the monogamy thing he was going to do it all the way. Go big or go home, so to speak.

He waited upstairs, in his bedroom, until Cam was done getting ready, donning the suit that had been a part of what Sebastian had spent his morning doing. Cam deserved nice things and clothing was one of Sebastian's favorite things to give. He stared at his phone, waiting to hear the Cam was ready, and then he headed downstairs, eyes soaking up the gorgeous man before him, "Hey." He said with a smirk, "I did well, that suit looks gorgeous." He said, leaning in to kiss Cam softly.

[theeldestsmythe]

Texting - Seb & Cam

Cam: Well... I couldn't exactly sleep on the couch with you.

Cam: I don't know.

Cam: I want kisses.

Seb: Come upstairs.

Seb: I'm barely dressed,but kisses I can give.

[theeldestsmythe]

Texting - Seb & Cam

Cam: Hey.

Cam: I'm texting from my room, I know.

Cam: I can hear the sarcasm and bitchiness already :)

Seb: Oh you couldn't make it up the stairs /this time/ but you could to sleep in my bed?

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

Never Close Our Eyes || Cambastian

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

The new position felt a little strange, especially since this was Cameron’s first time bottoming. It was different to what he had expected, he didn’t really know what to expect. He was not expecting the amount of pleasure to hit him as soon as it did. As Sebastian came, Cameron moaned loudly and shivered, Sebastian’s hand now wrapped around his cock. “Fuck, Sebastian," he moaned, arching his back ever so slightly as his partner’s hand moved with a perfect pace that was hauling Cameron closer to an intense orgasm. “Fuck, fuck…" A hand reached for the duvet, fisting a ball of tight fabric in his hands, his moans became slightly higher in pitch until finally, Sebastian’s name was moaned in an exhale from Cameron’s lips, his chest moving up and down slowly as he took deep breaths to enhance the orgasm (something he had read, yet not something he really needed with someone like Sebastian around). He panted hard as his back hit the mattress once again, his body left in a sex-stoned, blissful state that he was drifting in at the moment. All he wanted to do was to curl into Sebastian’s arms.  "Seb?" he whispered, looking at his partner with a tired smile, his cheeks blushing with a soft pink, eyes shining with nothing but love, asking his partner to hold him close. “C’mere."

[theeldestsmythe]

Sebastian pulled out of Cam, stripping off the condom and tossing it for the trash, curling up next to Cam, hands wrapping around his hips as he pulled the sleepy, sex stoned man closer to him, "That was amazing." He whispered, kissing his shoulder, nuzzling his nose against the skin there, kissing and tasting and sucking lightly to leave a mark. His lower body was tucked tight against Cam's, still feeling the light moisture of the lube, "It's better....Someday maybe we'll do that without a condom. I'll get to show you how it's supposed to feel." He said with a smile, stroking a hand through Cam's hair.

"I hope it was good for you." He murmured, "I mean, you came and moaned my name so I'm gonna go with yes, but I just wanna make sure." He grinned and kissed Cam's cheek, falling quiet and laying there, holding Cam tight against his chest, murmuring softly into his skin, lines of some French poem about love, words he'd never say first, never say out loud so that Cam knew what he was saying. It was soft and quiet, like a secret.

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

Never Close Our Eyes || Cambastian

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

Cameron blushed and winced softly as Sebastian worked himself in. He moaned softly and closed his eyed tight as Sebastian kissed him. Cameron was still trying to get used to it, to get used to the fact that this was actually happening; Sebastian had and felt something for him. The slight burning was perfect. It was what Cameron liked. He wanted to feel Sebastian there and continue to feel it even after they’d finished. Maybe it was a strange thing to hear but he liked it — he couldn’t help it.  "I can’t get enough of you," Cameron whispered shyly, lifting his legs around Sebastian’s lower leg, trying to keep his right leg as strong as possible. “Feels so good." He moaned once again and placed his hands on Sebastian’s bare back, feeling the warmth of his skin upon his fingertips; his partner’s breath warm upon his skin. As they moved, Cameron felt like he’d never want this to end. It was like no one could ever ruin this moment. They were together right there and then, no one could change anything — even if they tried. He rocked his hips with Sebastian, his leg starting to ache after about ten minutes but Cameron couldn’t care less. "Fuck," he whimpered, moaning softly, panting lightly into Sebastian’s ear. “You’re perfect…"

[theeldestsmythe]

Sebastian felt Cam's leg begin to shake, a clear sign of too much effort being expended by it. He decided to shift them, pulling back out of the kiss and stopping his movements, bringing Cam's bad leg down, resting it on the bed before pulling out and thinking for a moment, He sat back, "Come here." He motioned for Cam to come to him, Sebastian kneeling on the bed, his cock still hard and heavy. He helped Cam come down onto his cock, resting on Sebastian's lap, "Fuck. No you're fucking perfect." He nipped at Cam's neck before he began the small movements this position allowed, but he was already so deep inside Cam that every motion produced an effect, Sebastian letting out a groan as Cam's body contracted around his cock.

He sighed and stared into Cam's eyes, his own a deep blue and full of need for the man he was with, "You feel amazing." He murmured, kissing his lips softly as he gently laid Cam back, pulling his good leg up and pressing it back against his chest as he rocked as deep into Cam as he could, kissing whatever skin he could find as he fucked himself into Cam, staring at him, feeling his own orgasm build. He knew he wouldn't outlast Cam, and resolved to get him off spectacularly after he came, waiting until his own orgasm hit before wrapping a hand around Cam's still-hard cock.

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

Never Close Our Eyes || Cambastian

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

It felt strange that Sebastian was doing this, but in the most perfect way. He hadn’t expected it. None of it. The kiss. To be in his bedroom for the first time. For Sebastian to be going all the way with him. It confused Cameron. Did Sebastian even love him? There must’ve been something… Sebastian kissed him and that thought alone was enough to give Cameron butterflies. He closed his eyes and ran a hand softly through his own hair, taking a deep breath as Sebastian started to insert a finger. He opened his eyes briefly to blink away subtle tears, not understanding how they even got there. He felt overwhelmed, cared for… But was this love? He was still trying to figure it all out. The writer smiled softly and exhaled with a shy, almost hesitant moan; as if scared Sebastian would laugh at him for it. “I… L— Fuck, this is so good," he moaned, almost admitting for the second time that he loved his partner. He couldn’t help it, but he also knew that he couldn’t say anything until his partner was ready. He couldn’t. As broken as Cameron was, he knew Sebastian had broken pieces too — even though he didn’t really show it. In a way, that’s why they worked; they both fit where their were broken pieces. He waited until he felt right, until Sebastian worked him enough before he gently placed a hand on top of Sebastian’s as if asking him to stop. He smiled shyly, blushing.  "I really want you," he whispered. 

[theeldestsmythe]

Sebastian blinked at Cam, "Cam you're not...it might still hurt." He leaned up to kiss Cam, "I don't want to hurt you." He breathed against his lips, three fingers deep in Cam, Cam's body stretched and taut around his fingers, his cock hard on his stomach, and Sebastian's own cock hard between his legs, "I..." He swallowed. "Okay." He kissed him hard, pressing their lips together quickly, brutally, the kind of passion and affection he knew how to show so well. He backed away and gave him a confident grin, sitting back to pull his own boxers down and find a condom, for Cam's protection more than his own.

He slid it over the head of his cock, the flesh ever-so sensitive considering it hadn't been touched and he'd been hard since the club. He pulled it down and slicked himself with lube, eyes alternating between Cameron's stretched hole and his face, "You're so beautiful, Cameron." He said, his accent slipping when he was aroused, too many things to focus on to bother covering the french that threatened to slip at any moment.He spread Cam's legs as far as he could, and lifted his hips a bit more, kneeling forward and lining himself up with Cam's hole, "If it hurts you need to tell me to stop." He said, leaning down to kiss him as he began to work himself into the tight opening.

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

I don't need this shit right now.

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

I’m not going to… I—I don’t want to.

[theeldestsmythe]

Okay.

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

I don't need this shit right now.

[camhummel-deactivated20150804]

You can’t fuck this up, Seb. Trust me. I… I’m not going anywhere. Ever.

[theeldestsmythe]

You can if you want to. If you don't wanna stay with me. I get it.