russian petnames for shane
so ilya likes to mess with shane calling him some random russian petnames, right? no one asked but i have opinions and also work to do but unrelated
first, the long game ones:
moya gazonokosilka (lawn mower) - cursed, pretend it never happened. too random, doesn't sound fun or cute in russian, can't imagine russians saying that to their lovers
moy pomidor (tomato) - actually very cute, love it. shane blushes a lot (ilya is not capable of that for geopolitical reasons) so moy pomidor works perfectly. moy pomidorchik (diminutive) would be even cuter
moy lyubimiy (my love) - works good but skip moy, just lyubimiy
now some of my ideas. not suggesting that ilya would call shane that but i would:
shanezhka (spelling?) (diminutive for a шаньга - fluffy sweet cottage cheese bun) - sounds very close to shane's name and also has this tender suffix at the end that is just perfect for russian ears. why it's perfect? because this nezh (неж) thing at the end is the same as in the word tenderness/genleness (нежность), like hello? also shane is a sweet bun, has sweet buns and needs sweet buns (fuck you, microbiotic diet)
gagarochka (diminutive for a loon) - sounds fun and cute in russian
dushnila (stuffy person i guess?) - just a very natural and quite endearing way to call your boring husband when he is schooling you about that damn one (1) cigarette again
also dushnila sounds very close to dusha (soul), and calling your loved ones moya dusha (my soulmate?) is some deep russian shit. i can totally see ilya messing with shane switching between moy dushnila and moya dusha to check how his russian lessons are going, bonjour
ulitka or ulitochka (snail) - just how we call slow people, and shane is famously a very slow skater. also sounds cute and tender in russian
cursed but zhopa, zhopka (ass) - no jokes, very common petname. playful, fun, rolls off the tongue and has that you are an asshole love you so much undertone
that's it for now, might update later