For the ship meme, modern au Wei WuXian/Lan Wangji (obvious choice lol). Hope you're having a good time!
YEET IT MY BOIS also hap borth wifi i was gonna do A Thing but then sdfdkfhdfh it’ll have to wait for Murican 10/31 instead
Using their birth names exclusively here too.
Who’s more dominant: Lan Zhan, hands down…but Wei Ying is one hell of a power-bottom.
Who’s the cuddler: Wei Ying! Lan Zhan is pretty adverse to physical contact with most people, but Wei Ying is The Only Exception when it comes to prolonged skinship.
Who’s the big spoon/little spoon: Lan Zhan is big spoon, Wei Ying insists he’s a spork.
What’s their favorite non-sexual activity: Lan Zhan is tempted to say most everything with Wei Ying, so long as Wei Ying is happy. He gay, keep scrolling. Wei Ying, on the other hand, finds a deep joy, vast as the sea, in Lan Zhan singing to him, especially his original compositions. With the soft twang of the guqin in the background, Lan Zhan’s singing voice never fails to make Wei Ying feel content and loved.
Who uses all the hot water: “Wei Ying, you’ve been in the shower for an hour now.” “YEAH AND I AIN’T COMIN’ OUT TIL I’M READY. GO PEE ELSEWHERE.”
Most trivial thing they fight over: “Wei Ying. Stop trying to shave uncle’s goatee.” “But he looks so much better! He’s always complaining about how both his nephews are gay, but if he was so worried about bloodline bullshit then he can just shave and make his own babies!”
Who does most of the cleaning: Lan Zhan, without a doubt. Wei Ying is more than content to live in a state of organized chaos his entire life.
What has a season pass on their dvr/Who controls the netflix queue: Lan Zhan pays for it and controls the queue in theory, but the moment Wei Ying becomes interested in anything it goes on the list.
Who calls up the super/landlord when the heat’s not working: Wei Ying does, because Lan Zhan sounds too intimidating over the phone and the last receptionist who picked up their call got spooped.
Who leaves their stuff around: Wei Ying leaves his possessions around the house like Hansel and Gretel left breadcrumb trails.
Who remembers to buy the milk: “Wei Ying, no. You’re lactose intolerant.” “Wei Ying, yes! #YOLO and all that good stuff. -proceeds to crack open the gallon of milk in the store and chug-”
Who remembers anniversaries: Lan Zhan does. Wei Ying’s memory is spotty when it comes to most some things; he lives on Google calendar and Facebook birthday notifications are his saving grace.
Who cooks normally: Who in their right mind would willingly let Wei Ying into the kitchen to cook?!
How often do they fight: They have their fair share, but Lan Zhan is just frigid whereas Wei Ying is the erupting volcano. It’s usually over something self-sacrificial or self-disparaging that Wei Ying is thinking or doing.
What do they do when they’re away from each other: On the off chance they’re more than a foot away from each other, they text constantly and video chat and call whenever they can.
Nicknames for each other: “Happy birthday, Xian Xian.” “…Lan er-gege, that sounds so awkward coming from you. I appreciate it, but please. No.”
Who is more likely to pay for dinner: Lan Zhan got that platinum credit card and that phat wallet. Wei Ying is broke af.
Who steals the covers at night: Wei Ying steals the covers. Lan Zhan steals Wei Ying.
What would they get each other for gifts: Lan Zhan would shower Wei Ying with gifts, including anything Wei Ying eyes for more than 10 seconds. Wei Ying constantly draws and makes crafts for Lan Zhan.
Who kissed who first: Lan Zhan did, the poor repressed dude. Wei Ying had no idea it was him for the longest time.
Who made the first move: Lan Zhan did. Along with move 2, skip a few, move 99 and 100. Wei Ying was too dense to pick up on them for the longest time.
Who remembers things: Lan Zhan remembers every little detail and preserves every little keepsake.
Who started the relationship: Wei Ying! Because Lan Zhan had been waiting for 5ever and you can’t start a relationship without both parties consenting. It’s like that moment when you’re playing a 2player game and while player 1 hit start super early, player 2 doesn’t do so until hours later.
Who cusses more: Wei Ying can swear like a sailor.
What would they do if the other one was hurt: If someone hurt their beloved, that someone is a goner. If it’s through an accident (koff Wei Ying koff) then Lan Zhan will just…dote. And dote some more.
Who is the dirty talker: Wei Ying. Jiang Cheng mentioned, disgusted, that he should give phone sex work a whirl.
A head canon: Wei Ying sometimes wears Lan Zhan’s shirts to bed when he’s not around, and when Lan Zhan comes home the following morning and sees the sleeping Wei Ying wearing the too-large shirts that aren’t even buttoned, it takes every ounce of self-control not to jump him there and then.
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