a hunger artist

They poked into the straw with sticks and found him in it. “Are you still fasting?” asked the overseer, “when on earth do you mean to stop?” “Forgive me, everybody,” whispered the hunger artist; only the overseer, who had his ear to the bars, understood him. “Of course,” said the overseer, and tapped his forehead with a finger to let the attendants know what state the man was in, “we forgive you.” “I always wanted you to admire my fasting,” said the hunger artist. “We do admire it,” said the overseer, affably. “But you shouldn’t admire it,” said the hunger artist. “Well then we don’t admire it,” said the overseer, “but why shouldn’t we admire it?” “Because I have to fast, I can’t help it.”

[thehungerartist]

she told me she loves me, and i told her i love her too, and neither of us were really surprised. none of my friends were surprised. none of her friends were surprised. my mother wasn’t surprised. her mother wasn’t surprised. the sun wasn’t surprised. no one was surprised.

she’s moving to canada in three weeks, which means there will be six hours between us instead of ten.

she told me that she will try to find a nice canadian guy to fuck while she thinks about me until we can be together.

sometimes i feel like it was never meant to be this way and sometimes i feel like it was always meant to be this way.

[thehungerartist]

[thehungerartist]

[sad-plath]

(So I keep my hands inside my hands.) (So the city won’t rattle.) (So I don’t weep on the bus.) (So I don’t wander the guardrail.) (So the flashbacks go quiet.) (So the insomnia sleeps.) (So I don’t jump at car horns.) (So I don’t jump at cat-calls.) (So I don’t jump a bridge.) (So I don’t twitch.) (So I don’t riot.) (So I don’t slit a strange man’s throat.)

Jeanann Verlee, Good girl

[thehungerartist]

[thehungerartist]

ayn rand was a white supremacist who had probably never even heard the word intersectionalism and thought it was right to drive away native americans from their land stop worshipping her as some sort of feminist/liberalist icon because you think it’ll make you sound intelligent.

[the-funtime-autocrat]

Excluding her views on Native Americans, Someone’s never read the person they’re condemning.

[thehungerartist]

you’re right i wasn’t even close to finishing [atlas] before i started gagging and was forced to stop.

[thehungerartist]

[turklet-deactivated20121025]

the moral of the story is never have feelings for anybody ever

[thehungerartist]

i am good at emotional detachment but there is something about loving her and feeling pain come from it that makes the masochist in me wallow in it headfirst and without hesitation as if it will purify me or whatever and i don’t know if it’s because of the fact that she is the only person i have ever loved and it gives me a sense of harmony to actually know what i am feeling for once or because i am hoping to somehow redeem myself to her and be with her one day. and i really have no one to blame but myself for being in this situation because i date men and then date their friends and try to make sense of it and fail because it always comes down to me being in love with the same girl i was in love with three years ago and the closest i have come to telling her was kissing her and apologising for it then making love to her (she called it fuck but she doesn't know) and apologising for it, sitting across from her in a suburban shopping centre in melbourne in july and knowing that she’s about to cry and being so close to telling her but not doing it and now we’re at two opposite sides of the planet again and it’s funny because 2.5 years ago i wrote on this blog: “i know i will never tell her and it’s fucking killing me” 

good on me i got it

[thehungerartist]

[raveneuse]

[sunrisebreeze]

[thehungerartist]

[chaya-k-deactivated20190201]

[thehungerartist]

[julimajer-blog]

[chanelxdreams-deactivated201401]