Unfortunately there are just some people who have been wired to be emotionally destructive to themselves and others. Typically we just call these people mean. The good news is that with practice they become pretty easy to deal with and lucky for you I've had a lot of practice. Here are my 4 tips on how to to deal with mean people.
1. Acknowledge Your Pain.
The key is not to deny what we are feeling, but rather to accept it. Take a moment to be mindful and narrate your emotions: This embarrassment is excruciating. I am so frightened right now. Hang in there with unpleasant feelings at least long enough to acknowledge them.
Often we don’t want to admit we are hurt by another person’s meanness; we want to let it go without letting it get to us. If you can do this, more power to you. But if you can’t, that’s okay, too. You will survive the discomfort of your hurt feelings. It is perfectly normal to feel bad when someone wounds you.
2. Get Away.
This of course I'm sure if obvious and you've no doubt thought about this. It can be difficult if this person is a family member, co-worker, or friend. The bottom line is that you don't need people like that in your life. My main reasoning for writing this article is to prevent current victims from becoming someones villain in the future. As soon as you can stop subjecting yourself to that behavior the better off you will be! So if you have a way out take it! Hurt people hurt people and that leads me to my second tip.
3. Remember to be compassionate above all!
I used to have a friend whom I considered really close to me but couldn't understand why he would take every opportunity to belittle me or hurt me. At first I would try responding with little quips of my own but that didn't really make me feel any better cause I could feel that toxic energy rising in me and I know that's not who I wanted to be.
Instead I started fighting fire with water. I began using a loving-kindness meditation using phrases like “May you be happy. May you be healthy and strong. May you be free from suffering” while imagining the person who tried to hurt me.
4. Lions Do Not Concern Themselves With The Opinion of Sheep.
I learned that my "friend's main issue with me is that he struggled with finding original ideas of his own and resented my creativity. He also didn't like the way that I was able to freely express myself. Do you think that I stopped expressing myself? Hell No! I kept doing me and at the end of the day that 's the best thing that you can do. If you are so inclined you might want to ask...
Of course there are numerous ways to deal with mean spirited people. These are just a few tools to get you started. Good luck with your situation. And as always please feel free to share your experiences in the comment section below.
Do Ya'll Think That Mariah and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson would make a cute couple.
I'm glad she's getting out and doing stuff. It's cute for her i know that she's enjoying being a mom but I feel like I don't really see her anymore. Some writers are addicted to having a laugh Mariah's expense. I got the feeling she's so paid that she does not care. That however does not excuse this nasty ass drink they put her name on!
According to global dance music icon Afro-jack EDM is indeed the new rock and roll. I was at his release party when he made that bold declaration. Even though I wasn't necessary inclined to disagree there were a few things that made me curious on what would lead him to make such a broad statement.
First the term Rock and Roll has at least two different meanings today, both of which are in common usage. One refers to the original wave of music that originated in the United States in the 1950's and would later develop into the more encompassing international which we currently refer to as pop music. The alternative refers to "rock music" who's genre includes heavy metal and punk music. I wondered which Rock and Roll was Afro jack referring to
Caption: Elvis Presley greeting segregated audience in 1962.
Days after the concert it occurred to me that he was referencing pop music and it's ability to bring people together much like the music of the late 1950's and 60's which has been credited with the easing racial tensions in the United States and helping to facilitate the civil rights movement. Will cultural historians say the same about this resurrected genre? Forbes recently reported that the top Dj's earned in excess of a billion dollars last night but did I miss a memo is everyone listening to dance music?
Caption: Some of E.D.M tops paid performers.
As I looked around the crowd I did notice that the seemed to be pretty diverse. You had your preppy kids, your hip hop crew, your hipsters. Then came the moment of truth I noticed a gay couple walk by holding hands. Now like I said earlier that crowd seemed diverse enough but as we all know sexuality is less easy to discern and up until this blatant display of affection I hadn't spotted any "obviously gay" folks. Quickly, I surveyed the crowd to see if I could see any homophobic reactions and to my pleasant surprise no one seemed bothered in the least, not even the hip hop guys (and yes that was my attempt at describing urban black men in a politically correct fashion)
My first experience with dance music wasn't the drug infested zombie fest that my friends had suggested it would be. Instead it appeared to be my first glimpse at a post homophobic America. From a musical standpoint I still have some concerns about the implications that dance music's increasing popularity will have on traditional music and how we value artist who dedicated themselves to those disciplines. For now I'll save that for another article. In the meantime let's dance.
I love to laugh ,but then again who doesn't? It's makes you forget your troubles and some doctors even say it's good for your overall health. On this particular day I really needed to laugh my best friend was in the hospital and some looney with a gun next door decided to take a hostage making it very difficult for me to even leave the house. To top it all off I was also in the doghouse with my boyfriend.
After negotiating with law enforcement to allow me to walk through their crime scene. I began making my way west on Santa Monica Blvd to see comic and fellow "Gaylebrity" Sampson McCormick. Shout out to Dwight O'Neal for coining that phrase. The gig was in WEHO which caused me a brief moment of anxiety because my short time in L.A has informed me that despite it being the official gay neighborhood I'm much more suited for less pretentious settings.
However, I''ll tell you this. There are few sounds like a packed hall full of people not just laughing, but stupid laughing. I met one other friend at the venue but for a short time all of us there were connected. It was an incredible evening and I found myself telling everyone I knew about “this hilarious stand up routine I just saw.” I told friends, family, and even a handful of strangers while I was waiting in line at the Farmer’s Market by the grove. I couldn't help myself. People needed to know how funny Sampson McCormick is.
So funny in fact that he's being considered for a grammy nomination. Comedy legend Bill Cosby is among his competition this year, but to quote Sampson "Mr. Cosby better hold onto his pudding pops!" Similar to Cosby, McCormick has an exceptional knack for connecting with the audience via his relatable and charming southern persona. He's also easy on the eyes which I'm sure doesn't hurt. I can't wait to see this guy in a movie or tv show which I'm pretty sure is going to happen in the near future. In the meantime you can check him out in the video below; he also has an audio recording that can be purchased here. Keep up the great work Sampson and good luck on that Grammy!
Unfortunately there are just some people who have been wired to be emotionally destructive to themselves and others. Typically we just call these people mean. The good news is that with practice they become pretty easy to deal with and lucky for you I've had a lot of practice. Here are my 4 tips on how to to deal with mean people.
1. Acknowledge Your Pain.
The key is not to deny what we are feeling, but rather to accept it. Take a moment to be mindful and narrate your emotions: This embarrassment is excruciating. I am so frightened right now. Hang in there with unpleasant feelings at least long enough to acknowledge them.
Often we don’t want to admit we are hurt by another person’s meanness; we want to let it go without letting it get to us. If you can do this, more power to you. But if you can’t, that’s okay, too. You will survive the discomfort of your hurt feelings. It is perfectly normal to feel bad when someone wounds you.
2. Get Away.
This of course I'm sure if obvious and you've no doubt thought about this. It can be difficult if this person is a family member, co-worker, or friend. The bottom line is that you don't need people like that in your life. My main reasoning for writing this article is to prevent current victims from becoming someones villain in the future. As soon as you can stop subjecting yourself to that behavior the better off you will be! So if you have a way out take it! Hurt people hurt people and that leads me to my second tip.
3. Remember to be compassionate above all!
I used to have a friend whom I considered really close to me but couldn't understand why he would take every opportunity to belittle me or hurt me. At first I would try responding with little quips of my own but that didn't really make me feel any better cause I could feel that toxic energy rising in me and I know that's not who I wanted to be.
Instead I started fighting fire with water. I began using a loving-kindness meditation using phrases like “May you be happy. May you be healthy and strong. May you be free from suffering” while imagining the person who tried to hurt me.
4. Lions Do Not Concern Themselves With The Opinion of Sheep.
I learned that my "friend's main issue with me is that he struggled with finding original ideas of his own and resented my creativity. He also didn't like the way that I was able to freely express myself. Do you think that I stopped expressing myself? Hell No! I kept doing me and at the end of the day that 's the best thing that you can do. If you are so inclined you might want to ask...
Of course there are numerous ways to deal with mean spirited people. These are just a few tools to get you started. Good luck with your situation. And as always please feel free to share your experiences in the comment section below.
The Official IconCity.net Playlist "What We'd Wish They Play In The Club"
Tired of the Radio? Wish the DJ would get with the times. Check out our constantly evolving playlist for the hottest and the latest music. Stay cool and be #Iconic
Nicki Minaj Drops New Single and Show's Signs of Being "Bothered" by Iggy Azalea!
So Nicki Minaj just released her new single "Pills and Potions" which is from her upcoming album "The Pink Print" a nod to Jay-Z's iconic "Blueprint" album. This is Nicki's first step back into the pop came after dropping harder tracks like "Lookin Ass N*****" and "Yass Bitch". But while promoting the track on the morning radio circuit Nicki had and interesting reaction to a recent article about rising female rap star Iggy Azalea!
Check Out The Interview Below and Then The New Track Or Reverse It. P.S. I went in on the memes for this one so head over to my insta @AnyeElite to see more! -A.E.
Fans are Petitioning Beyonce and Jay-Z to Create Full-Length "On The Run" Feature!
After the release of Beyoncé and JAY Z's "RUN" trailer which was released on May 18th, 2014, millions of fans across the world became devastated after seeing "coming never" at the end of the exciting and action packed "RUN" trailer. We, the BeyHive and JAY Z fans would love for our two favorite artists to actually make a full length movie based off of the trailer. Why? It would most definitely sell millions, it's also casted so perfectly (Don Cheadle, Jake Gyllenhaal, Sean Penn and Blake Lively) and most importantly, it would make your fans happy. We love you B and Jay, you two have to make this happen. Please, the world wants the "ON THE RUN" movie! If you haven't seen the trailer click below and if you want to sign the petition click the link after the jump.
Mariah Carey's Me. I am. Mariah. The Elusive Chanteuse: Track By Track Review
In a few days Mariah Carey will be dropping her fourteenth album "Me. I.Am. Mariah...The Elusive Chanteuse" and we were able to get a first listen. Below is my track by track analysis of the album.
1.Cry: Mariah aims to please her long term fans right out the gate. Just the voice and piano. As the title suggest, it is an emotional song and quite frankly I would prefer one of the other songs to start of the track-listing. That being said she is in fine vocal form here making it clear that there is still one and only one Mariah Carey. Despite the recent comparisons to current chart toppers she remains often imitated but never duplicated.
2.Faded: Mike Will Made It! When the track dropped and I heard his ubiquitous intro I was like "OK, Mariah don't do nothing crazy". I say that because we all know she can get a little carried away when it comes to the hip-hop tracks. Instead, this track ends up being pretty solid. Mariah rides the beats pretty well it might make for a good single.
3.Dedicated featuring Nas: Not only is this song perfect for hanging with your someone special at the same times you also feel like your are chilling with Mariah herself in the studio. This isn't Nas and Mariah's first time working together. They first collaborated on ""Thank God I Found You" the remix.
4.#Beautiful: Y'all already know this song. I'm not doing this again sorry.
5.Thirsty: When the track was first released last week the reviews where mixed with some claiming that the song sounds too much like "Niggas In Paris" I disagree but I still can't help but wondering who's she's talking about. Besides that I love this song and think the album would of been well suited to start off with this track. It's perfect for today's radio I hope they pick it up cause I can see people in the club rocking to it. Actually it's one of my ringtones. The song is literally filled with rapper like punchlines but you know Mariah
6.Make It Look Good: This album has a a throwback doo-wop vibe. It's also enhanced by the one and only Stevie Wonder on the harmonica, a trend first made popular by Drake on his Nothing Was The Same LP. Of course this comes off a little more authentic considering that Mariah and Stevie share more music sensibilities.
7.You're Mine (Eternal): Unfortunately this song underperformed on the charts and kind of set the tone for the entire "How is this album going to be received?" narrative. Surprisingly within the context of this album it actually shines more. Translation, it's a wonderful track album but perhaps didn't need to be a single. It definitely is a continuation of the "We Belong Together" aesthetic.
8.You Don't Know What To Do (featuring Wale): Every since this song debuted last week around the same time as "Thirsty" but unlike any of the previous singles this song actually received mostly positive reviews mainly because it follow in the popular disco revival that's taking place in music now. Think Daft Punk and Pharrell. Wale's verses aren't as exceptional as they usually are but his presence make the track current. Otherwise it could easily be mistaken as an unreleased cut from Glitter.
9.Supernatural: Mariah's a mom now so when she said that her daughter Monroe can sing I had to roll my eyes but the girl has a nice tone and despite comparison to Beyonce's inclusion of Blue Ivy on her cd. Mariah's daughter actually "carey's" a note. (see what I did there?)
10.Meteorite:Personally my appreciation for dance music is a work in progress so I can't really say much on this track.
11.Camouflage: More Classic Mariah. Think "Close My Eyes" from Butterfly
12.Money (featuring Fabolous): If you were one of the first listeners of the Itunes stream then you may have noted that this song was missing from the playlist but it's up there now and I'm so glad because without the album begins to drag at this point. Some fans may complain that Mariah mostly plays hook girl on this track.
13.One More Try: On this George Michael cover Mariah really really delivers the good. In case you are keeping count this is another #classic Mariah ballad for all you people nostalgic for the curly brunette era.
14.Heavenly (No Ways Tired/Can't Give Up Now): Anyone that's grew up in African-American church will automatically recognize this Mary Mary cover. It was already one of my favorite songs and with the exception of the hip hop drum kit she does the song justice.
Bonus Tracks: Unfortunately I don't have access to the Bonus Materials at the moment but they are mostly out takes from Memoirs featuring Mary J. Blige and R.Kelly.
RAY-J, You Mad Or Nah? Giving Kim and Kanye Sex Tape Profits.
Ray J is out of control. According to reports, he’s planning on giving Kim Kardashian and Kanye West a $47,000 check which represents 4 months of 2014 profits from his sex tape with Kim.
Here’s how Ray J’s portion of the profits break down
– January $6,135.60
– February $20,097.31
– March $9,674.76
– April $10,931.52
– TOTAL: $46,840.13
Vivid Entertainment alleges the tape has grossed over $50 million since it’s release. TMZ says they were told Kim gets at least as much as Ray J — but they aren’t sure how much.
No word yet on if Kim will accept Ray’s gift, but he said if she doesn’t want it then he’ll donate the money to her favorite charity.
I had not idea that tape was selling like that!
So she's technically not a new artist but Sevyn Streeter has been making significant strides in the music industry this year. After being a member of two failed girl group bands (I think this was when the Industry was scrambling to fill the void left by Destiny's Child.) Sevyn is stepping out on her own and her future looks promising.
Like I said earlier she is not really new to the industry She has written songs for artists such as Chris Brown, Brandy, Kelly Rowland, Alicia Keys, Fantasia, Trey Songz, Ariana Grande, and Tamar Braxton. Just based on the talent of the artist singing her songs you have to admit that the girl has talent. At this point I'd describe her as a cross between Kelly Rowland and Keri Hilson but here at Icon City we expect her to make a big name for herself really soon. Check out her latest single "Next" featuring Kid Ink.
Most of the time I'm really happy when someone is pregnant. Unfortunately, I have to be honest I was not thrilled when I first learned the news that Kerry Washington was expecting. Y'all don't understand I am a complete pop culture junkie with no chance or interest in rehabilitation. The withdrawal was so severe I had to turn to other things. (We'll talk about that in another post). Good news is Scandal is coming back this week so all is forgiven. ABC is promising 8 new episodes with 0 repeats. In honor of this fabulous news I re-watched the last episode.
It was just like my first time. You know that talking to the TV thing you do when you're watching TV alone. Yeah I was in it. So now that everything is fresh in my mind again let me give you my top 3 predictions on what's going to happen next. (I've been watching some previews too)
1.Papa Pope is finna wreck some shit!
Maybe not in the first episode back but according to the clips I saw papa pope ain't going nowhere. Which is OK with me since it seems like he's not really all the bad after all. Secretly, I think Momma Pope vs. Daddy Pope might end up being more intense then Olivia and Fitz's relationship.
2.Mellie is going to find a man of her own!
Speaking of Fitz and Olivia I think it's pretty clear to the first lady that she's pretty much lost her man. As she comes to terms with that she's probably going to find someone else to love. Rumor has it that it's going to be in the form of guest star Jon Tenney who'll be joining the cast as a reoccurring character. Good For Mellie! She's probably my favorite character.
3. Someone's going to die and I think it's going to be one of the gladiators.
I don't have any thing to support this theory other than my gut. My gut is also telling me that its going to be Harrison especially since someone is coming back into the country presumably to kill him. If I'm right I'll be a sad considering how handsome Columbus Short is. I wish they would take Quinn instead, that hoe get on my nerves!
Were you very popular in high school and college? Did you always knew you had an attraction to men, or was it something you discovered over time? And who is someone you look up to for motivation and inspiration?
I don't know about "very" popular. I suppose they fancied me enough to vote me in as there high school king! The thing is that since I was open about my sexuality and of course as everyone knows I love a festive moment so I think people where kind of into the idea of me but I don't really remember having a lot of friends. Some things never change but I've always had music to inspire and motivate me so I try/tried not to sweat it! Thanks for the question.
I guess if I had to name one person tho it would be Mariah Carey.
New Mariah Carey Single Out Tomorrow! Like I Said It Features Trey Songz!
So as I reported a couple of days ago, Mariah Carey will be releasing her new single "You're Mine" tomorrow to radio and all digital retailers.
The original version of the song is a solo offering from my butterfly queen while the remix features R&B crooner Trey Songz who has also been releasing some pretty dope buzz cuts over the past few weeks,
I hope it does better than the "Art of Letting Go" while I appreciated it as am album cut it failed to do anything on the main charts. Are you excited about Mariah's new release?
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