The Mad House In America

An English family of five who moved from Berkshire to America in June 2014

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Special Needs

As I have mentioned before my son has special needs. Autism and ADHD are in the media a lot, but what about other special needs. Zac not only has ADHD, he has learning disabilities.

Learning disabilities can be caused by a number of things:

Neurological

Genetic

Environmental

Prenatal

Postnatal

We think Zac’s is caused by genetic or neurological problems, but we can’t be 100% sure. Zac has a short attention span which does not help when he also has ADHD on top of his learning disabilities. Zac also has trouble with his short term memory and needs to be taught things over and over so it gets stored in his brain. He also has trouble with writing and maths, and is below grade for his age.

Although Zac looks like a normal 12 year old boy, he acts much younger than he is, but this does not stop him being super friendly. Unfortunately for Zac he also has speech problems, sleep problems, (which I have written about here https://themadhouseinamerica.blog/2018/12/04/sleepless-in-maryland/), and he is also being assessed for genetic disorders, (nothing has come up yet). What this means is that Zac and I visit a lot of doctors. Currently we go to six different doctors to help Zac get the best out of life

Zac is lucky in a way. He gets to meet so many excellent doctors and specialists, and none of his problems are life threatening. So even though Zac doesn’t outwardly show anything wrong with him, for example stimming, he is constantly holding things together to conform to todays society. He is constantly processing everything, which makes him slower than normal. But you know what he always does it with a smile on his face, and we could all learn that from him.

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[themadhouseinamerica]

Special Needs

As I have mentioned before my son has special needs. Autism and ADHD are in the media a lot, but what about other special needs. Zac not only has ADHD, he has learning disabilities.

Learning disabilities can be caused by a number of things:

Neurological

Genetic

Environmental

Prenatal

Postnatal

We think Zac’s is caused by genetic or neurological problems, but we can’t be 100% sure. Zac has a…

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Biscuits and Gravy

One of the most often asked questions I get asked here in America, is, ‘What do you miss most about England?’ Well apart from family it’s food.

America has some really nice food, and then it has some really crazy food. Biscuits is the food that first comes to mind. Being British saying the word ‘biscuits’ conjures up images of Bourbons, Hobnobs, Chocolate digestives etc. My mouth is watering just thinking of all the yummy biscuits from England! Unfortunately, rather depressingly ‘biscuit’ does not mean this in America. Biscuit here is more like an unsweetened scone. I apologise (I just had to fight with the computer to put a ‘S’ in apologise instead of a Z. The trials of a British person living America!!), in advance to anyone who likes biscuits, but oh they taste horrible and to make matters worse they are usually served with ‘gravy’. This isn’t the typical yummy gravy you get with roasts, no this is pale and lumpy…..blurgh.

Biscuits and Gravy

The other monstrosity I have seen is a salad with jelly (jello for all the Americans out there) chunks, and maybe if you are extremely lucky marshmallows mixed in…if you don’t believe me here is a picture of the said salad that I found on http://www.dailydishrecipes.com if anyone wants to give it a go! I would just like to say that I have never touched or tasted this ever!

I must look like some weirdo walking around the supermarket with my phone out carefully looking at all the food. It comes quite a challenge to shop when you become a British expat living in America. Gone are the days when I could look at a recipe, go out and buy the ingredients and come home without standing in front of the produce wondering if the American equivalent would work just as well. I’ve learnt that most American butter is sweet, but luckily where we live we can get Kerry Gold. There’s no such thing as Paxo stuffing here. They have big square bits of crispy bread with herbs. We have tried it and it’s ok, but nothing like Paxo.

Saying that , there are things that are better here than the UK. For example Mexican food, there is more choice to cook from and there is more choice in Oreos too if you like them, and lots of different tropical fruit.

Sometimes if you are very lucky you will find a treasure trove of English food. I got excited recently because one of our local shops started selling Heniz baked beans.

So think of me next time you go to the supermarket in England where you can find everything without having to search on Google in the middle of the aisle to see if the American alternative will work for the recipe.

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Biscuits and Gravy

One of the most often asked questions I get asked here in America, is, ‘What do you miss most about England?’ Well apart from family it’s food.

America has some really nice food, and then it has some really crazy food. Biscuits is the food that first comes to mind. Being British saying the word ‘biscuits’ conjures up images of Bourbons, Hobnobs, Chocolate digestives etc. My mouth is watering…

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Oven Glove Thumbs and Wet Noses

We have two dogs, Zero and Mog. Zero is named after Pumpkin Jack’s dog, Zero, from Nightmare Before Christmas. Mog was named after a Sainsburys Christmas advert, which was about a cat, (yes, she is named after a cat), that destroys Christmas lunch. They are both English Cocker Spaniels.

Zero was born in England and flew over on a plane. I don’t think that he has ever forgiven us for shutting him in a wooden crate, putting him in a noisy tin can, and trying to hold his wee for eight hours, (which he failed to do, and to make matters worse he rolled in it too..) Zero has become a bit grumpy in his old age, he is nearly seven. He hates small dogs and puppies, which is bad news for our other dog Mog.

We got Mog as a puppy four years ago. Zero was not best pleased that this tiny little thing had invaded his home. He has come to terms to having a little sister in his house, and sometimes he lets Mog play with him.

I swear that Zero has ADHD. He does does not stay still, wants to play fetch continually, even if it’s freezing cold. I think Zero must be part Husky! He will go crazy when it snows, rolls in it, eats it and will not come in even if you shout his name until you are blue in the face.

Mog on the other hand hates the rain and cold. She will stop dead by my car if it’s raining and will refuse to walk to the bus stop.

Mog is the complete opposite to Zero. She thinks she is a mountain goat and will climb rocks while Zero tries to swim to England. She also loves any dogs and wants to play with them all.

The thing they both agree on is food. They both love dog and human food. We have found Zero standing on the kitchen table before, and both have appeared at the door with white noses as they had got into the kitchen cupboard and decided to eat flour! It took ages combing out dog slobbered four out of their ears. They both have their favorites though. Mog loves the thumbs of oven gloves.

Zero loves used tissues, although they both love to eat socks.

Both Zero and Mog are their own characters, and I wouldn’t have it any other way!

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Oven Glove Thumbs and Wet Noses

Oven Glove Thumbs and Wet Noses

We have two dogs, Zero and Mog. Zero is named after Pumpkin Jack’s dog, Zero, from Nightmare Before Christmas. Mog was named after a Sainsburys Christmas advert, which was about a cat, (yes, she is named after a cat), that destroys Christmas lunch. They are both English Cocker Spaniels.

Zero was born in England and flew over on a plane. I don’t think that he has ever forgiven us for…

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More rain. ⛈🌧🌩I’m not being very British as I’ve driven to the bus stop, but in my defence it is crazy rain 😂 . . . #crazyrain #whenwillitstop #rain #heavyrain #droveinsteadofwalking #notbeingbritish #car #windscreen #schoolpickup #britinusa #expatlife #britinmaryland https://www.instagram.com/p/Bwu1M_IllvK/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=aidxsst55fx9

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Throw back to when Mog was a puppy and she decided that Batman would look better without a head and an arm. She has since moved on to oven gloves 😂🤣 . . . #batman #poor batman #headless batman #puppy #throwback #armlessbatman #ovenglovestastebetter #englishcockerspanielsofinstagram #englishcockerspaniels #englishcockerspaniel #dogs #dogsofinstagram #cockerspaniel #cockerspanielofinstagram #lifewithdogs #expatlife #britinusa #britinmaryland https://www.instagram.com/p/BwiBiIyFkXM/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=ywk4kzdpvg8d

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Mog getting her summer look on! . . . #englishcockerspaniel #englishcockerspanielsofinstagram #dogs #dogsofinstagram #dogoftheday #blackandwhitedogs #blackandwhitedog #blackandwhitedogsofinstagram #cockerspaniel #cockerspanielofinstagram #cockerspanieloftheday #cockerspanielofficial #doginsunglasses #readyforthesummer #lifewithpets #lifewithdogs #lifewithdogsisbetter #expatlife #britinusa #britinmaryland https://www.instagram.com/p/Bwh0uFAFDIa/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=14ju35ki36wqp

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My son running in the burgundy jacket, at the special Olympics. His photo was in the local paper. He came 4th. . . . . #running #specialolympics #specialolympics2019 #4thplace #specialneedskids #specialneeds #learningdisabilities #lifewithkids #expatlife #britinusa #britinmaryland https://www.instagram.com/p/BwdHEU5F2PF/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=98f1lv8yo7i0

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My son took part in the special Olympics today. He got 4th for running, bronze for long jump and gold for throwing! . . . . #specialolympics #learningdisabilities #adhdrocks #running #jumping #throwing #medals #goldmedal #bronzemedal #learningdisabilitiesawareness #specialneedskids #specialneedsparent #specialneeds #lifewithkids #expatlife #britinusa #britinmaryland https://www.instagram.com/p/BwXxvODFxRs/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=xsowrhdeu7xv

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Gizmo says Happy National Pet Day. . . . . #nationalpetday #bengalcat #bengalcatsofinstagram #catsrule #britintheusa #expatlife #lifewithcats #catinahat #paperhat https://www.instagram.com/p/BwHo4fRluHN/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1vo9o1gc34h9o

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Waiting to go into Laser Tag . . . . #blackandwhitephotography #happy #waiting #lasertag #blackandwhite #lifewithkids #britinusa #expatlife #britinmaryland https://www.instagram.com/p/BvZXUM_FVTm/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=mefvn0xatsj1

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Hypermobility

So how many of you can do this?

I can do all except my elbow, which has never bent backwards. I can actually bend all my fingers on each hand 90 degrees backwards. I have had trouble with my joints since I was very young, crying in pain because my knees hurt so much. At the moment I’m having trouble with my right thumb. It will suddenly clunk and I will end up with a shooting pain through my thumb joint, which then subsides to a dull ache.

This is all caused by hypermobile joints, which are supposed to calm down after you are 30. Apparently my body didn’t get the memo

. Unfortunately hypermobility is passed down genetically, my son is also hypermobile, but not to the extent I am. I decided it was probably time to try and sort out my joints, before they cause some permanent damage to my joints, like arthritis for example.

So I took myself off to the physical therapy (PT) place near here. When the PT was taking measurements, they were shocked at how mobile my joints are. People with normal joints score a three on their knee mobility, whereas I was scoring a 7

I started physical therapy this week. They are trying to strengthen the muscles around my knees and hips to reduce the mobility. I’m hoping it’s working. So far after each session a dull ache has appeared in my knees a couple of hours later, and my hips have clunked the next day. Today during the session my left knee seized up and I had to stop and click it….

I have six weeks of PT, fingers crossed it works and I will have less clunky painful joints!

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Hypermobility

So how many of you can do this?

I can do all except my elbow, which has never bent backwards. I can actually bend all my fingers on each hand 90 degrees backwards. I have had trouble with my joints since I was very young, crying in pain because my knees hurt so much. At the moment I’m having trouble with my right thumb. It will suddenly clunk and I will end up with a shooting pain through my…

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But He Looks Normal!

My son, as I have mentioned before has special needs. You can’t tell by looking at him. He is just a happy friendly boy, and that’s where the trouble starts.

People who don’t know my son will give strange looks when an eleven year old boy walks into the ladies toilets with me, or if he starts to play with ‘little kids’ toys. Other people will say, ‘oh he will grow out of it’, or ‘he is just a boy, they are always slow at things’.

Yes he is a boy, and yes he is slow at things, but no he will never grow out of it. He may well adapt so it’s hardly noticeable, but his needs are here to stay. The world would be a very boring place if everyone was the same. People with with special needs show us how diverse human nature can be.

I wish one of those miraculous diets that are floating around the internet really did work, but do I? I don’t think I would want to change my son’s unique personality, or outlook in life. He has had a lot of therapies growing up to help him on his way, and still receives some now. He still gets speech and occupational therapy at school every week, and he had physiotherapy to help him to walk and from time to time he still has behavioral therapy, not to mention all the the doctor appointments he has been to throughout his life to make sure there is nothing standing in his way, so he can ‘fit’ into modern society.

This poem was recently quoted on a program that was shown on the BBC, but it has been floating around the special needs community for a long time. It perfectly sums up what it is like to have a special needs child.

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New blog post!!! https://themadhouseinamerica.blog/2019/02/26/but-he-looks-normal/ . . . #specialneeds #welcometoholland🍷 #buthelooksnormal #specialneedskids #specialneedskidsrock #hewillgrowoutofit #britintheusa #newblogpost #bekind #followme #expatlife #britinmaryland https://www.instagram.com/p/BuW5L_7FLWp/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1z47bohqc9hq