I dared to dream. @themanwhodaredtodream - Tumblr Blog

Days

The Sesh (Part One)

The Sesh:

She stopped me in the street and asked me for a light. The first thing I noticed was the way her face curved on the left side, a physical ripple of hope as she stared into my eyes. Hope for a light. Sure, I said, concentrating on her and not on finding my lighter. This girl who wore a hat, stood and stared at me, waiting with a smile so invading, I started to wonder what she was so excited about. For many seconds, my fingers remained on my lighter. The description of her face had already changed by the time I pull out this lighter of mine. As the wind blowed into her face, her eyelids giggled at the way her lips felt in the breeze. I notice, that what I see as a natural ordinary, part of life, is to this person a plaything: like when your friend hits out with his natural one liner and it fills you, when you see a tightly wrapped present with your name on it and it feels right. I could feel a small curve on the left side of my lips as my heart raced with these thoughts.

Should I give her what she wants?

She laughed as I asked her name, and put a finger to my lips.

“ I haven’t found a name for what I shall call this”

As the light flickered in her eyes. I wasn’t sure where the flames started , for as she slowly pushed her skin against steel to make sparks, flames cascaded from her brow. Her face was wrapped in fire, and in those flames, if I started a little closer, I could make out two bodies dancing, not to a beat, but around the flames. One grabbed the other, violently using it’s skin as a shield to the heat. Just as a branch of this fire was about to tickle this body however, the other threw itself at the flames with such passion that even this angry element had to bow in fear.

Chelsea Wolfe- The Grime and the Glow

#halfsleep

Attention

When one feels so much, one can not know the feeling. When one is in admiration of creation, one cannot create. When one releases on coffee, cannabis and confort, one is an addicit. When one plays with his nightmares, one should call them dreams. When one wants to be noticied, one is not noticing. One wants to be. One should be. When one knows where it wants to go, one should be aware that there is a likelihood of tripping. When one wants some scrap paper, one should find the scrap and the paper in the mind. When one buys a guitar to sound like Jimi Hendrix, one needs to remember not even Slash sounds like Jimi Hendrix. When one really needs "a guy" or " a girl", please one, have a chat with your mum, dad, uncle, auntie, brother, sister or your favourite cousin. n When one visualises the top of the mountain, one should be aware there is a still a walk to go. Dont aim to be 9/10. Being number one is fun. Attention.

Sunset Blindness.

To the edge of the world and back again. I have seeen things, beauty and lonliness. Happiness and deceit. Everyone, and everything so desperate to grab onto a description, a feeling, holding onto the truth that if i can be explained, everything is okay... It's not ok. Not for me. I find words easily, feelings attract themselves to my speech.Therefore am forver trying to backstep to wake up to the fact that i am feeling.

Not with you.

The sun catches you r hair, it bounces of you, firing into my eyes, i become blind for a split second. My brain scrambles to recreate you, to not be intimadated, to be disapointed. Find words, find something. And then, the light fades. A shape formes around me. And there you are. Wander through the world and now, it doesn't seem remotely worth it.

I start talking, taking bits of things that have made the world laugh, trying to create a smile, throwing parts of me at you, notice me... I say shit. Silence. You look up and say something even shitter, just to make me laugh. We grab all the colors and throw them the canvas, because fuck it, it's beautiful. It isn't Monet, it isn't Van Gogh, it's us. Not us the cute couple, from every regretfull breath we have had to take, for all the murky water we wade through, suddenly i feel free. Beauty, yes please. Lonliness, why not?

Dear God, dear you.

Dark and Light, hello.

So many questions, i don't know where to start. You eat me up inside, you know. Taking over my body, with a pinch of hope and a little dab of fear. I look for you, then cower in tears. Help? Me? Can i ask for someone else to save me, or is it a binding life contract that i must save myself? Walking through life with my head held up high, proud to be alive, to then be scorned by the reflection in other’s eyes. I shouldn’t be looking up should i? I mean, i am always surprised when i see myself. Greeting an old friend? Or seeing the darkest monster in the closet? I push my head down, blinded by paranoia. Is it wrong to ask for guidance when i cannot see? I walk in shadows, cowering from the sun. it’s okay though.. means i get to dream of the light.

Forgive me Father for i have sinned.

I don't know who i am. Reality is something i challenged day to day. Father, i am your son. 50 per cent of you, is in me. Can you see it shining? Firstly, i am trying to be a man. Dealing with each emotion with strength and power, climbing over each hill. That is what a man must do is it not? Suck it up. And i do. I give life the best blowjob. But that much sucking takes its toll. I am weary father. My hand touches my smooth skin, and i feel the hard leather of an old horse, trotting a long to be put down after it's last race. I'm weary father. Weary of being a man. Maybe one day i will be a weary married man one day. And then become a weary father. And the cycle will continue. If that happens have i won? Will i see your smiling face looking down at me? Will that be enough?

Download the Song: http://www.izhawaii.com/store Israel "IZ" Kamakawiwoʻole's Platinum selling hit "Over the Rainbow" OFFICAL video produced by Jon de Mello ...

I will survive.

First I was afraid, I was petrified. To see the shadow of myself walking among them. The smiles I have left, the tears that I have taken to keep for me. To see myself, walking invisibly among them, knowing that soon my shadow will soon take my place again. It's inevitable, it's even painfully peaceful. Because it is meant to be. Sand is once again in my hand. Slipping away. But this time I know I can't do anything. One day, I will arrive upon the beach again, and my eyes will be greeted by dunes of endless sand. And then again and again, the wind will blow. I will feel it coming, slowly I turn my back. Close my eyes and picture the bright warm sun, and my feet buried deep in the sand. The wind blows harder. I can't open my eyes. If I believe, if I work for it, my god let me stay here. Then I realise my folie. Quick grab that sand tight, look at it, savour it. I turn. Eyes still firmly closed. The wind is gushing. I grab at the sand, wanting to hold it dear to me. Fingers digging into that warm comforting place. Silence. I can feel the sand. I have saved it. For me. Forever. I can look upon my triumph. my beautiful sand. I kept it. I made it. I saved it. I open my eyes. From darkness to light. And I look down in this beautiful light, and see. A fistful of sand. The same fistful of sand. And drop by drop. The sand is leaving my hand. No matter what I do, it's made up its fucking mind. Goodbye. Hello. I Sam standing, looking down at the same, worthless, forever the fucking same hand. I lost.

forget what you know.

imagine, behind each piece of meat

are eyes.

they see, the way they see.

but they are witnesses.

witnesses

to our eyes.

when i wake up, nobody is holding my hand.

#ghost black

To you, anonymous girl.

It's been so long.. so long since i have even seen you. i can imagine your silhouette, but your appearance..your body.. you, i have lost. So i need to tell you somehow, somewhere.. you are poison. Running through my whole fucking body.. Even though i have changed beds, my mind can still see you lying next to me. The feel of your skin is there so close, but cannot be touched. The holy fucking grail.Your poison invades my minds, it's always there.. haunting me. Are you thinking the same? it doesn't matter.. nothing matters, not even my letters. Invisible.. lost.. but i don't care. Fuck it, fuck you. cos you are still a part of me.

Is It?

The thoughts of her will always be there. In little dark places of your mind you never want to go. In bed, your mind will drifter. Your nose picks up the scent of her hair, you feel every little prickle from her hair, scratching so slightly. You feel the want to move your arm, to grab her.. But she is gone. And then you block those thoughts, close it off in your mind. And try and forget. To fucking forget. But she is there....

Forever?

we are already in that dark hole..just have time to grab a burger

fuck it.

lullaby-suicide

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