double vodka espresso

felix humphrey. 32. extrasensory perception. If you knew what was going to happen — if you knew in advance the CONSEQUENCES of your own actions — you'd be doomed. You'd be RUINED as God. You'd be a S T O N E. You'd never eat or drink or laugh or get out of bed in the morning. You'd never LOVE anyone, ever again. You'd never dare to.

[thementvlist-blog]

home, sweet home.

[thementvlist-blog]

thcdestroyer:

      —♛ Beatrix had never known the feeling of BELONGING, always drifting from place to place without an anchor to hold her steady during the rough winters, until she had met Felix. Though the sensation of something weighting her down gave more fright than wonder, at the end of it all, she had found herself a HOME in between his arms. A palace with empty hallways and icy walls hadn’t been able to bring such warmth and hope into her life as he has. A place of comfort was discovered, where she felt safe and confident enough to be herself without repercussions because odds were, Felix was probably thinking the same thing. After being deprived of such a thing for days the female was basking in the feel of his body surrounding hers. A content grin that mirrored his was painted upon her lips, cheeks regaining warmth that had been lost were dented, the look of someone so HOPELESSLY in love. His words, though teasingly said, brought a great deal of relief that quieted down the demons of her insecurities for the time being. ❝ Well, ❞ the brunette started the response with her familiar playful tone that was equal parts flat, to make one think she wasn’t joking, yet light enough to believe otherwise. ❝ I guess I can live with that, ❞ Beatrix said back before adding with a little snide. ❝ I’ll have to check my schedule though. ❞

      —♛ An eyebrow was arched at his first words waiting characteristically with impatience for the rest of the sentence. Then as Felix revealed a great detail she hadn’t known before, the petite gave an impressed nod but responded with words that did not reflect the action. ❝ He said, HUMBLY. ❞ Remarked she, referring to the obvious smugness in his expression before sinking her upper teeth into her full bottom lip with a look that conveyed slight hunger.

      —♛ ❝ Though that does explain why it was so delicious. ❞ Remembering the slight embarrassing fact she had INHALED the pastry in less than a couple of days, probably did not last longer than three. ❝ I could say some bullshit line about damning you to hell for the gained calories BUT I think we banged them out pretty good. ❞ What started out as a horrible pun ended as a terrible one, yet Beatrix still indulged herself in a chuckle for the effort. She then quite dramatically gasped as Felix told her about Trixie. ❝ That bitch, and to think I wanted to call a TRUCE. Guess we’ll just have to resume the war, only one pussy can survive. ❞ By miraculous effort, the brunette delivered this with a stone-faced expression, as if both of them were in a battle of who could be the greater actor. Swaying on her tiptoes Beatrix had forgone her usual regimens of workout to stay in the rented apartment to drink herself a new liver, and was now feeling the consequence in the burning of her hamstrings.

     —♛ Brown gaze lifted upwards towards his head, something she had been avoiding since crossing the threshold, and noticed the significant difference. OPTIMISM like no other washed over her and Beatrix could finally hope for something more without the bitterness of feeling foolish for thinking such things. ❝ I can. ❞ Even though he hadn’t demanded a response she still gave it with a soft tone that conveyed how delighted it made her. A bright eyed Felix was someone whom the petite had yet to meet, but was incredibly pleased to see. It brought such strong emotions her next words were uttered in a brittle manner. ❝ Words can’t describe how happy and proud that makes me. I believe we deserve to celebrate. ❞ Swiftly the petite then curled her left leg around his hip before doing the same to the other and effectively wrap them around his waist, using the wound arms around his neck as leverage, and also knowing he would stabilize her. Before he could question her, not that she thought he would, ❝ my legs were getting tired, you’re too tall for me you know. But reverting back to more important matters, what should we do to celebrate? You want to burn something down? Oh! Maybe a church? ❞

       He drank her in, her whole essence, heart fluttering happily despite the fact she kept cussing his CAT out. A CAT. Good lord. Felix allowed his fingers to go up to her chin, pressing at the bottom of it and lifting it up ever so gently—more of a tickle than anything else. The man couldn’t hide even if he WANTED to how much happier he was with her around. His hands appeared to want to press themselves into her skin and with her lifting herself up he gladly accepted it. “Too tall?” Eyebrows went up as so did she, his hands raising Beatrix’s body and pulling it closer to himself, eyes never leaving her brown hues, decorated in specks of lightly shimmering gold.  Felix turned around with his wife in his arms, them sliding to wrap around her waist better and tighter as he walked towards the bar, elegantly hidden between the cupboards in their living room. 

      Felix hummed with her offer, considering it for a second before shaking his head. “Too many explosions already have happened, I was thinking maybe something ELSE..” A sigh through the crack between his lips, one hand remaining on her back as the other swiftly searched for different kinds of liquor, with his hazel greens now fixated there rather on her. A few seconds later he took a couple of bottles, pressing one between them—as a temporary holder—and got to the kitchen. “THAT way you can rethink your plan to destroy Trixie, who hasn’t been anything BUT the sweetest to you, and,” he paused, placing her tiny body on the counter, yet r e f u s i n g to get his digits off her, and he remained relatively close, “Celebrate still, without getting SHUNNED from the island.” His last words were spoken with a little twitching smile, devilish glare thrown at her with his cheeks STINGING from trying to push away a grin. 

      Fingertips reached for naked skin under her blouse (it was HIS t-shirt, he was about eighty percent sure of it without even having to use his sixth sense), blazing hot and just as silky, memories flooding his brain, the heat traveling throughout his body enough for him to temporarily STOP mixing the drinks and take a breath. Felix tightly bit into his lower lip to keep his focus on the glasses and the cocktail making process while going up her spine like the tease he could be, but copying her tactics more than sticking to what he did best. No eye contact, even though they were close enough for him to feel the waves of warmth hitting off her skin and reaching his. “Strawberry or lime?” Finally inquired he regarding the garnish, eyes still elsewhere, a thickness forming at the back of his throat with the proximity—his gaze went UP, for the tiniest of seconds seemingly avoiding, but at the last possible moment connecting with hers again.

[odilia-ann-raven]

[thementvlist-blog]

felix, connor, marisol. {event #3}

[thementvlist-blog]

madameviper:

cxnnorbell

         people, M I S S I N G. as they had read out the names of those that had disappeared, an immovable lump grew in connor’s throat, his grip briefly tightening on his daughter’s hand before he decided to scoop the girl up into his arms in a protective embrace. some he recognised - god, dinah, he’d only met with her the other day. connor bobbed felicity up and down, trying to distract her from seeing the fear in everyone’s eyes, and hearing it in their voices. it seemed aglæca was only getting more and more dangerous as the days went by. he thought back to that day the spring festival ended, when the eyes of the sculptures had begun to bleed. he couldn’t have guessed that that was only the start of it all.

        scattered across his table was everything he thought he might need on the search, and then some: flashlights, maps, bottles of water, food, a first aid kit. felicity had been staring at him wordlessly as he retrieved each item, all to be shoved in a large backpack he had never really had occasion to use, until now.

        finally, he was ready. father and daughter looked across the table at each other with matching blue eyes. connor couldn’t even imagine what state he’d be in if felicity had been one of the ones who had gone missing. he rounded the table and pressed a kiss to the crown of her head. ❛ i’ll be back before you know it, flick. ❜ ( he was leaving her in the care of a trusted neighbour, in his laboratory. unless they knew his passcode, no one would be getting in ).

        connor drove his car out closer to the centre of town, where he’d organised to meet with felix and marisol. on sight, felix looked as though he were about to blow a gasket. the scientist got out to help the two put their things in his car, but felix had already beaten him to the punch. ❛ OF COURSE we want to find them, ❜ connor reassured the other man, before stealing a wide-eyed look at marisol when he thought felix wasn’t looking. stabbing himself through the ear? that was a rather colourful choice of imagery.

        but he understood. the man was concerned about his wife. about to get into the driver’s seat ( it was clear that felix wasn’t in the best state to drive ) connor addressed the both of them. ❛ are we ready to go? ❜

@madameviper·

She’d spent two years of her life in Aglæca, & never in Marisol’s wildest imagination did she ever think THIS would happen. It seemed like the state of the circus town & its inhabitants were getting worse & worse, with its remaining citizens creating search parties & the others KIDNAPPED. She had begun friendships with some of those who were taken, wondering the worst about them if the townspeople couldn’t find them.

She pulled out an old backpack that she had stuffed in the far reaches of her closet, blowing off dust & throwing away old scraps of paper inside. She ran around the house trying to find the things she’d actually need rather than the stuff she thought she needed; first aid kit, water, flashlights & extra batteries, snacks, her keys, & a switchblade somehow made it into her bag ( just in case, she thought ). Before she left, she said a quick goodbye to her Reptile Room, making sure they all had water & that their tank temperatures were ideal, then shut the door behind her.

Marisol made a quick jog towards the center of town, dressed in an old t-shirt, sport-shorts & running shoes, hair pulled up & out of her face. She figured at some point, Felix, Connor, & herself would have to start walking, as a car would only get them so far if they found any leads off-road.

When she arrived, she instantly knew Felix was not in the happiest of moods, if his ear stabbing comment was anything to go by, but for good reason. She’d be upset in his situation, too.

— ❝ We have to hope for the best in this situation, ❞ she said to him, going around Connor’s car to open a door to the back seats before turning towards the scientist, ❝ We have the southern part of town, yeah ? I’m ready, but what’s the plan from here on out ? ❞

         They were so calm..Why did they appear so calm?! Was it because they pitied him? The hungry hands of his power reaching out to pick their brain, already in waves telling him what was OBVIOUS. Understanding was what his brain would usually tell, but with paranoia crawling over his skin, and with fingertips going numb from invisible electricity, he saw pity. The man had to shake himself up, take a good few breaths in just to try and calm his nerves. Alcohol would have helped, a lot, but he knew they needed him sober. His mind had to be sharp and clear, lest this journey would end in a bad way. 

        NONE of them were fighters. In this group they had a person who was younger with each passing day, a snake charmer and a LUNATIC who heard voices, basically. Who even sorted people like this? It didn’t make much sense, to be thrown together in a completely random way. But it was already done, and he knew he’d—they’d have to work with all that they had on the spot. 

        “Southern,” he repeated, shifting in his seat next to Connor, head turning to Marisol for a glance, trying to CONCENTRATE enough to get something valuable out of this, but so far? Nothing. How infuriating it was to be useless. “OKAY, okay. Let’s think what kind of location would make sense for them to take. It’s either extremely obvious—” pause, and, “—no, no that’s not it. Secluded. We need to go as far away from here as we can, somewhere cornerish..” He must looked like a crazy person or someone trying to pretend and be a psychic, but weren’t they just in luck! Real psychic readings five dollars each sat in the same vehicle. Albeit a little crazy at the moment, he HOPED to be a somewhat useful tool, and hoped his brain wouldn’t fail him now. “I could tell you how I know but it would only take precious time from us, so unless you have a better idea—” he shrugged. 

@cxnnorbell​

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felix, connor, marisol. {event #3}

         To say that Felix was stressed out was an UNDERSTATEMENT. His heart went to his knees, and he felt dizzy when his wife, amongst so many others, was announced m i s s i n g. It was six months ago all over again. But this time, he didn’t feel that helpless, or pathetic, or as if she had left him after getting tired of his ass. No, this drove him absolutely I N S A N E. Just how it had to be expected. Anger boiled so high his head was all over the place, his power reaching out and then pulling back in finding absolutely nothing. Only he knew it was a trick upon a trick, but even though it would have helped, he didn’t stop to ponder if others were just as panicky as he was. Probably not. 

        They separated an hour ago. Maybe. Time was a weird thing, sometimes it skipped, sometimes it crawled. By himself he tried to search out a small area, but it must have looked more like a giant BIRD hitting the glass wall over and over again, trapped by its own ignorance. And who could blame him, really? Probably those people who were in their clearer mind now, few as they were. 

        “OKAY, chop chop before I punch MYSELF through that cement wall. Honestly guys, do you even want to find them?” A heavy sigh fell through his lips as he groaned loudly pushing the stuff he had managed to pick up the last goddamn minute into the trunk of Connor’s car. Felix tried to focus, tried to see and reach out again, but to no avail. “I HONESTLY cannot believe this is happening, it’s like—my worst nightmare come to life. All OVER again.” He was mostly just being dramatic, exaggerating things to excess, as he could have gotten himself together, BUT. “What the fuck is even wrong with this town? Every time I step outside I get the urge to stab myself through my ear, and make it seem like a murder. Like that CHICK from the hundred, only in reverse.”

@cxnnorbell

[inkskinned]

she tells me the devil is banging away locked somewhere in her throat, living in her chest cavity i don’t know how to tell her that if angels could speak their voice would be the color of her eyes, that if there’s something unholy it’s how much my hands shake when she’s laughing, that the last time i looked at her i forgot how to breathe properly and yes i want to sin when she’s around but she’s the temple of my salvation, the bruised knees, the ache of holiness in a small body. 

she says: i hear demons and they are eating me.

if you’re the devil, i’d sell my soul to spend time with you. but i promise you outshine the moon. we’re young and stupid and we have nowhere to go and there’s nothing we can do. so come pray. lock lips, speak tongues, part seas. come pray. we will baptize ourselves in the heat of our bodies. come pray. we’ll find heaven. just come pray with me.

[thementvlist-blog]

home, sweet home.

[thementvlist-blog]

thcdestroyer:

      —♛ Tongue bitten so hard the taste of copper infiltrated her mouth, Beatrix stopped the SHEDDING of her outer skin as Felix uttered the words. Heart beating insanely fast, chocolate hues never strayed away from the male as he turned his back on her. The possibility of him never accepting her apology became all too real, and it took every inch of her self-preservation not to lash out in anger and poisonous bitterness. A nagging voice at the back of her head was snidely reminding her that it was all a matter of time before Felix got tired of her shit. Her mother used to say men liked COMPLIANT wives not one that argued excessively and went against their decisions for mere FUN. Even a young Beatrix had known how incredibly fucked up her mother’s words were but as she watched her husband, who looked ready to jump off the ship, there was a new light being casted on them.

      —♛ Gaze flittered low to the cake box in her hands, the same one he had given to her all those years ago. It would be a tough transition but if it truly made Felix happy to watch her walk away then Beatrix would make the sacrifice. Not that she had to live with his absence very long seeing as their separation would inevitably lead her to a life of alcohol and drugs until they killed her. Definitely the IRONY to end all ironies. Maybe the kidnapping had been a sign from a higher power, a universal ‘fuck you, this is what you deserve’. The royal rarely demonstrated weaknesses and even fewer insecurities, but that didn’t mean there were NONEXISTENT, she just became impressively good at burying them deep. Yet when it came to Felix, the demons in her closet seemed to crawl out of the woodwork, a self-sabotaging mechanism; as if they knew the male would be watching them. After a couple of moments had passed the female had squared off her shoulders and raised her chin preparing herself for the worst, though still willing to do ANYTHING to make him smile. 

      —♛ But then Felix turned his body toward her, with that heart-skipping grin that always managed to make her BREATHLESS even after years of being married to him, and she bit her lip in anticipation hoping the smile meant good news. The shock that came from his sudden spin was evident in her posture and facial expression as it remained wide-eyed and mouth slightly agape. After being mentally okay with the fact of him rejecting her, Beatrix was stuck in the process of switching back to hopeful. Closing her eyes at the sensation of his fingers on her skin, it felt as if he was patching her up slowly, all her broken parts being sewed together by just being in between his arms. ❝ You fucking douche, ❞ she murmured back at him, her voice soft, adding a chuckle at the end. ❝ I thought this was IT. ❞

      —♛ The cake box being smothered against them gave the brunette some incentive to roll her eyes at him. ❝ You know how hard it was to look for this cake? ❞ Though her voice and expression conveyed no anger as her eyes glittered no longer with unshed tears but with a JOYFUL glint that only he seemed to place in her chocolate orbs. ❝ I can’t believe I’m going to say this but I actually even missed that fucking fur demon. ❞ Going ahead and dropping the cardboard square on the ground not even wincing at the terrible squishing sound it made, Beatrix wanted to get something out of the way first. ❝ How are you? ❞ She asked almost afraid at his response as her arms wound themselves around his neck. ❝ And DON’T give me a bullshit answer, please. ❞ Even though she had maintained contact with Katherine, the female wanted to hear the words from his mouth.

            Felix could have either left himself to rot with all the anger he stubbornly refused to let go, or he could have done this. And this temporary peace was so much better than anything else his head could come up with. His lips reformed themselves from a grin into a warm smile, eyes following their example as the pads of his fingers tickled the creases around her lips when she smiled. It felt like getting so much closer to the sun without the risk of getting burned up. “You’re a douche,” he repeated back at her in a teasing tone, corners going even more up for a single moment. He kicked the box away when it got dropped without a sign of regret (there was none from his side), and let the miniature woman get closer, warmth flooding through the layers of his clothing. “Please,” Felix rolled his eyes, shaking it off immediately. Every single one of his movements was soft, and pulsed of pure energy. There was nothing SEXUAL of how his fingers pressed into her amber skin, heated digits seeking even more warmth, hazel greens reflecting the most precious thing; he finally felt at peace, the worries around them melting away, even if just for a bit. “I am planning to keep you around for a little longer, if that’s okay with you,” his smile widened again, fingers playing with silky brown threads of her hair, spinning them around and watching them slip away. 

               "Mm, actually, I do not,” he responded regarding the cake, scrunching up his nose for a few, a brow going up as he went through his own memories, a baiting gaze forming as he looked at her, letting a PAUSE sink in still taunting her before he continued, “Because I made the first one myself.” 

              At this point he half expected a pinch for the smugness in both his voice and expression, but it didn’t matter. Nothing did, not right now. Even if he knew he still had to climb mountains to deal with his pesky addictions—perhaps even visit Ruby more often, if she agreed—and that his clearer head was not to be taken for granted. He heard what the other woman said, and he tried to force himself to get better. At first it was for Beatrix, mostly, and when he felt the actual results? He thanked the gods he didn’t even believe in—thanked some sort of higher power that it pushed him towards it, because it was worth it. For once, to not feel like he was completely falling apart? He would have gone through seven seas to just keep it this way forever. “Then you’re going to be hurt knowing that I don’t THINK she missed you at all. You are very mean to her.” This was, again, said in jest, but he pushed it to be just dramatic enough to look ALMOST real. 

              And then came the question he anticipated for, from the very beginning. The answer was close to obvious; he was better. But was THAT what she wanted to hear? No bullshit. He thought for a little bit, the feeling of her nails gently scraping the back of his neck made him dizzy, warmth flooding through his cheeks and jaw. “I’m sure you can tell,” he said, as her power always showed the darkness around him whenever it was BAD. But his thought process was as sharp as never before, and for the first time in quite a while he enjoyed what he had within himself. It didn’t feel as much as a curse anymore; understandably, it didn’t end here, and one could have found more black spots in the sheet if he searched, but the whole picture wasn’t stained and blurred anymore. “I can see now,” he whispered, “I can finally s e e.”

[thementvlist-blog]

sullivanmock:

clearliquors:

BOLD what applies to your muse.

PLACE IN SOCIETY

financial: wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty.

medical: fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged.

class or caste: upper / middle / working / slave / unsure.

education: qualified / unqualified / studying.

criminal record: yes, for major crimes / yes, for minor crimes / no.

FAMILY

married - happily / married - unhappily / engaged or betrothed / partnered / single / divorced / separated.

has a child or children / has no children / wants children.  

close with sibling(s) / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased.

orphaned / adopted / disowned / raised by birth parent(s).

TRAITS + TENDENCIES

extroverted / introverted / in between.

disorganized / organized / in between.

close minded / open-minded  / in between.

calm / anxious / in between.

disagreeable / agreeable / in between.

cautious / reckless / in between.

patient / impatient / in between.

outspoken / reserved / in between.

leader / follower / in between.

empathetic / unemphatic / in between.

optimistic / pessimistic / in between.

traditional / modern / in between.

hard-working / lazy / in between.

cultured / un-cultured / in between 

loyal / disloyal / in between.

faithful / unfaithful / unknown.

BELIEFS:

monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic.

belief in ghosts or spirits: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care.

belief in an afterlife: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care.

belief in reincarnation: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care.

belief in aliens: yes  / no / don’t know / don’t care.

religious: orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious.

philosophical: yes / no.

OPINIONS

pro-choice / anti-abortion /  doesn’t know or on the fence.

pro-marriage / anti-marriage / doesn’t know or on the fence.

pro-death penalty / anti-death penalty  / doesn’t know or on the fence.

pro-drug legislation / anti-drug legislation / doesn’t know or on the fence.

left wing / right wing / middle / doesn’t know or on the fence.

SEXUALITY + ROMANTIC INCLINATION

heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual.

sex repulsed / sex neutral / sex favourable.

romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favourable.

sexually: adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious.

potential sexual partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all.

potential romantic partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all.

ABILITIES

combat skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none.

literacy skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

artistic skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

technical skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none.

HABITS

drinking alcohol: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess.

smoking: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess. 

other narcotics: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess.

medicinal drugs: never / sometimes  / frequently / to excess. 

indulgent food: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess. 

splurge spending: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess.

gambling: never / sometimes / frequently / to excess.

[thementvlist-blog]

❛ Fuck, you’re old. ❜

DEADPOOL SENTENCE STARTERS@thcdestroyer

             Her words first brought nothing but laughter, as he turned away from his grumpy wife, and gave a light shrug continuing to do his tie. In reality, they were only four years apart, and it wasn’t much of a difference, but as always, Beatrix couldn’t help but tease him, only if for so much as a little frown between his brows, or a remark thrown right back at her. “It’s not MY problem you have an old men fetish, Beatrix,” retorted he evenly, with his voice hiding a jokingly placed mock underneath his tongue. Then, as the act had just begun, he slowly turned to her, features becoming more interlaced with feigned shock with each passing second. 

            “Is THAT all our marriage is to you? A goddamn KINK?!” He exaggerated as much as he could, drama spilling through every move he made. “That is disgusting, you should be highly a s h a m e d of yourself and your behavior. To lead me on like that, for your own sick and twisted PLEASURE?” If he were capable of seeing himself from a side now, he would know that he should have went and gotten into acting school instead of doing circus shit. Sadly, that door was already locked, and another thing, Felix had a little bit of trouble doing what people told him to. After the fake storm had passed, he stepped to her—still looking like he was going to burst into a song or “fight” even harder any second—and pressed two fingers of his hand to her cheeks enough for her lips to go in a form of an ‘o’, and kissed her completely RUINING her lipstick — on purpose, of course. Then, wearing the red on his face proudly, he gave her ass a good ol’ slap— “Hurry up, babe, we’re going to be late,” —and walked away.

[thementvlist-blog]

home, sweet home.

[thementvlist-blog]

thcdestroyer:

      —♛ It was somewhat of a wish of hers to look back onto the days sans Felix and REMEMBER what happened. But it was a flimsy film cartridge, only showing blurred images of highlights: metal bat, smashing cars, bar fights, possible jail, sexy guest, and a yellow submarine? It was possible that last one was all hallucination, must have been the bad shrooms. Either way drunk, high, or most likely both, Beatrix could not escape the pain and loneliness his absence brought her. Though it had been the correct decision at the time, it had healed her in a way she wouldn’t have while staying by his side, it became known quickly that the delivery had not been the best.

      —♛ She could have handled the situation BETTER, possibly waited until the drugs actually wore off, but thankfully Katherine had replied to her messages so the concern for his well being had diminished for a bit. Being surrounded by empty walls and less than stellar furniture only further increased her NEED to have Felix around her. Her nights were spent on a chair by the window since sleeping on an empty bed was not an option, both figuratively and literally— the bed on the rented apartment had no mattress. The only functional space had been the bar, the brunette had not even bothered to set anything else up. And she had a feeling their apartment would probably look worse for wear as well.

      —♛ But after maintaining such an emotionless streak she had FINALLY broken down, it had happened suddenly while taking what was intended to be a relaxing bath. The pressure of everything that had passed since the moment she had been kidnapped punched her lungs so hard she had become breathless. Knuckles turning white from clenching the marble tightly, a tear had escaped and the relieve that went after had felt so enticing that she had let more fall down until the female was sobbing into her curled knees. Time flew away as the water turned cold and Beatrix had forgotten what she had been crying for; Felix, her parents, their circumstance, her shitty childhood, or even EVERYTHING all together. The day after had felt worse than waking up from a massive hangover, but Beatrix could not deny it had healed a crack that had been splintering since her kidnap. Grabbing the first clothing in sight, which sadly was a pair of rippled worn-out jeans and a shirt she had stolen from Felix’s closet, coincidentally the same outfit she had been wearing at the hospital but cleaner, Beatrix had marched out of the apartment with a DETERMINATION that had been lost the previous days. 

      —♛ Walking through the familiar hallway was a bittersweet sensation, but the grandiose feeling of returning HOME was strong enough to overshadow the pain. With the cake box on her hands the female had wasted no time in entering the trashed apartment, no surprise there, and walking to where he was sitting. Happiness in an amount that could not be described entered through her sour veins at seeing him somewhat sober and better than how she had LEFT him, and how that one word abraded her very soul. Before she could say anything Felix stood up and strode toward her, his snark was understandable, she couldn’t even fault him if he chose never to forgive her. Swallowing thickly the brunette cleared her throat before finally speaking, her voice on the hoarse side since it had not been used in a while. ❝ I know, which is why I brought cake. ❞ Lifting her hands an inch to support her words, she added, ❝ it’s chocolate-coconut flake-almond dacquoise flavored. ❞ The same type of cake he had brought her all those years ago. Taking a deep breath, bottom lip quivering slightly over the intense emotions GUILT being the strongest, she began peeling a layer of herself.

      —♛ ❝ I made a mistake and I’m sorry. ❞ The brunette managed to choke out, surprised at the moisture gathering in her eyes, she had figured her body could not manage more tears. ❝ I DID need some time to put myself together but I shouldn’t have just left like that. You…you’re a piece of me, Felix, and without you I am LOST. And I can’t lose you, this world can burn itself to the ground, but I can’t handle you being gone. ❞ Beatrix smashed her lips together as a way to gather herself up before continuing. ❝ You found parts of me I didn’t know existed and in you I found a love I no longer believed was real. And if you can’t forgive me, I would understand but I just needed you to know that I love you, and that will NEVER change. ❞

              Whatever he had expected from her, it wasn’t that. Felix wasn’t used to seeing Beatrix carrying her heart in the open—even for him. He had never asked for such a thing either, he understood, he knew without words spoken, so much that perhaps it became TOO comfortable for the pair, and bad things were inevitable to happen. Lesson learned, he thought, it was enough now. A part of him wanted to go back to the way they were, but another pushed him to ask: would she do it again? As words began flowing out through her lips, he knew she felt GUILT between her ribs, but he wasn’t so sure what he felt. “Stop it,” it burst through before he could hold it back, tongue curling and words coming out with force—no matter how much ANGER he felt before, it all didn’t matter now, or at least he knew he could convince himself it didn’t. 

              ‘...shouldn’t have left you like that’ — he almost threw a remark at her words, that she SHOULDN’T have, but she did, and there was no sign of guilt then, making him more silent than he would be any other time. Of course he was bitter, of course it made him pull back, doing the opposite of before—when he nearly BEGGED her not to leave, and his eyes for a second covered themselves in a thin layer of the same fresh anger that he felt once he had started sobering and realizing the situation for what it was. He made a step back from her, turning on heel and turning away, as if for his eyes to observe the wreck he had left out of their apartment. Even though he knew it would have been so much easier to replace it all, he felt the TINIEST droplet of sentiment that faded as quick as her words melted into the air. Although he walked away, step by step, he still listened to what she had to say, his reaction neutral; as if she was trying to have the most normal of conversations, and not spilling apologies about her rash decision. 

             His hand went to his own throat, fingers pressing into his skin, seemingly checking if it was still there tightly sewed together with no cracks at all. Then his own ring caught his attention, lowering his left hand to observe the how it caught light as he moved it to sides. A memory slowly crept back into his mind, one he had never forgotten, only stored for a rainy day. The cake. A simple, even a little SILLY tradition they had, and that particular one was the one he had given her as an apology. Corners of Felix’s mouth twitched upwards with that thought and he turned back, hands grasping her to spin; it was always easy with her being tiny, and he loved watching how threads of her hair fell around her face and shoulders when he did.

          While he appreciated her effort, and made a mental note to thank her for that later, he ignored the cake and the sentiment, his expression BARELY changing; going a little softer, for her. Always, and a n y t h i n g for her. “Don’t be silly,” he breathed with voice silent, even and velvety, letting his digits make home at the crook of her neck, drawing gentle lines even  if he knew she was far from fragile—she could have had him on his back in mere seconds, “You know I love you more when you are coldhearted and evil.” It was a joke of sorts, something to lighten up the morose mood she had brought with herself. It was unavoidable and even expected, but it didn’t mean it had to last. Green hues dropped towards the box as he got a little closer, it cracking in resistance. Fuck that cake, to be honest. It wasn’t the most important thing in the room, and he made it clear with another step, making the box screech with horror. Felix cupped her cheeks, fingertips drawing ornaments and watching them appear and disappear again smoothly. There was so much MORE that he could see for now, albeit he knew it would temporary if he returned to his old habits. 

[thementvlist-blog]

rubyredsongbird:

      the scream caused a STARTLE. near jumping out of her skin —- that wasn’t the reaction that she’d been hoping for in the least. still, there were worse places she could have ended up. there were worse places she had. maybe if she just explained… then again, how did one explain this ?? she wasn’t even sure what was going on with herself, and the one place answers might’ve been found didn’t seem the safest place to go.

           “i’m sorry, i’m s o r r y. look, i can explain.” time to put those acting chops to the test… or something. her stomach was a flutter of nerves, and not of the welcome sort. “- and is beatrix really that suspecting ?? if i were going to do something with a man who’s spoken for, i definitely wouldn’t sneak in first thing in the morning while she was in bed.” beside the point, but it bought her time. “unless, that sort of risk were my thing. i mean, i imagine it’s kind of exciting, but i have a boyfriend, so…” her gaze flickered up towards him, smiling nervously.  “yeah.”

     “so, the reason i’m here, right. you see, i wound up staying out later than intended and needed to get inside somewhere, so i thought to myself… why not visit my pal felix —- then you were asleep && i didn’t want to wake you guys so i figured i’d slip out before anyone woke up.” a decisive nod. yup. that was what she was going with.

             “What? No,” a frown, as her words drew him even more out of his sleep, making his fingers reach and rub them harder, begging to stay open and him awake. “I meant... never mind. DOUBT she would be against Matthew joining you, but I am not exactly sure if he’s her type..” Felix sighed, brushing off the sentences he couldn’t yet comprehend and fixing the shirt he had thrown over his shoulders with her arrival. 

               Felix stared at the redhead for a good second, blinking, frowning even more than before, trying to make sense out of what she was saying. “RIGHT,” he didn’t even try to pretend he bought it, but he wasn’t going to nag her to speak, “I know you’re lying, but I don’t really care if ONE of us is going to be honest here.” He paused, took a couple of steps towards the bedroom, trying to hear anything indicating Beatrix had been woken up, and when it was clear she was still soundly asleep, he turned around to tip toe towards the kitchen. “You want some tea, Red? I mean obviously you’re not going to leave right away since you came to visit me, and that would be just plain RUDE.” 

[thementvlist-blog]

home, sweet home.

@thcdestroyer

             The week—all it was a few days, no more—was like hell on earth. It hadn’t been the FIRST separation the pair had suffered from, and the previous one was much worse, and it should have felt that way. However, knowing it was done on purpose peeled into his heart stronger than the six months of the unknown. Felix could have succumbed again to his weaknesses, drowned himself in a mixture of various drugs, but there was a thought somewhere at the back of his head that it could have ended in a similar way it already did. With a hospital, and another week. 

            Every five minutes felt like an hour with him not being able to distract himself with his regular dose, and one can drink only so much teas to get some sleep. Felix couldn’t say that he wasn’t somewhat ANGRY about all of it, his brain digging up an argument every few minutes why he was in the right this time; and any other time he would have STILL reached out first, unable to spend so much time alone. But now? He felt unwanted and left like an old pair of once favorite shoes. That didn’t exactly made him sad, but more bitter, deciding to suppress any healthy emotions with whatever he had in his power and pretend they didn’t exist. 

            It wasn’t until he reached out to the source Beatrix had mentioned before, and let the woman help him that he started slowly pulling himself together. It was clear that one time wasn’t enough, and slightly cleared up mind only helped him sleep better and made the mutation more manageable, but he had a LONG way to go. 

            The apartment? Trashed. WELL. Not so much trashed as a few things broken, a good analogy of what he hid inside, even though he DID try to pretend he was doing just fine, lest Beatrix decided to go back one day unexpectedly. As he laid there on his couch he realized it was far too big for him alone, even if two animals were sleeping nearby—it lacked a certain FEEL to it that his wife’s presence left; or perhaps he was just lonely. And every time those thoughts began flooding back again, he tried to remember what had been said in the hospital, remember her face and how she LOOKED at him to bubble some anger up. Sadness was an ugly feeling, making him feel vulnerable and bad, but anger was so much better to deal with. So he let it take over his heart, let his pride grow as much as the liquor coated his throat. What else was to do for a man who was LEFT instead of LEAVING? Just when he had finished his second glass of wine and cigarette smoke began to fill the living room, ashes dropping on the rather worn out coach he had made his place at, a very distinct sound of heels click caught his ears and before he knew a PAINFULLY familiar figure appeared before him. What a sight for sore eyes. No matter, he pushed himself to remain as he was, slowly moving as he knew some sort of talk was about to come. 

            “Now LOOK what the cat dragged in,” he spoke up, not bothering to even stand up. His first reaction might have been more snarky than necessary, clear mind making Felix coarser than a week ago—flashback to the days when they had just met. It was also his PRIDE that pulsed seeing her right there, a bright memory of their last meeting made him oh-not-so-friendly. One part of him knew he should have given her some credit—even though he didn’t know what exactly she was doing there, not yet, knowing Beatrix it must have taken a lot for her to show up, and that was enough for Felix to visibly swallow the bile down: put out the cigarette, get up on his feet and make a few steps towards his wife. “You’re late,” giving her a reproachful look, he made a pause that seemed to last forever, looking down once before locking hazel greens on her again, intense and analyzing.

                                                  “The food is already cold.”

[thcdestroyer-blog]

(insp.)

@thementvlist

[disappearinthemoonlight]

[thementvlist-blog]

cat: walks by

me: what a cute cat

cat: sneezes

me: this cat is amazing

cat: literally lays around doing nothing of note

me: i have never loved anything more than i love this cat

[thementvlist-blog]

♤

♤ meme: 20@thcdestroyer

              He sat there quietly, without moving a single muscle for a few long minutes. Bitter silence, he could TASTE it as it sunk into his skin, penetrated his veins and mixed up with blood; only to poison his heart, and the effect was immediate. It STUNG whenever he wanted to speak. Felix cleared his throat, but it was the only sound the man had made in the past ten minutes. His appearance had seen better days. Bloodshot eyes, dark circles under them, skin as pale as the day of the explosion—only now he had done this to himself. Like always, it was no surprise. HE was the mastermind behind his inevitable demise, he didn’t need any help reaching that.

             “I’ll never change. You need to understand that.” Felix with clear mind—as clear as it could be—knew that any suggestions of what she should do regarding him would be brushed off. Beatrix would never listen, stubborn as she was the woman was DETERMINED to sew herself to him, wrap her tiny body around him like a serpent if needed, and THAT was what pained him the most. 

             “There is more wrong with me than just that thing in my head; you need to understand that now, before you wake up fifteen years later regretting every s e c o n d of it.”

[robinshcerbatsky]

Getting married is the bravest, most wonderful thing you can do.

[thementvlist-blog]

@thcdestroyer

[thementvlist-blog]

                                   FELIX HUMPHREY!

             His first reaction was full on laughter hearing his name, then he shook his head in protest. “No, no way.” It was all a JOKE to him, but from the stares of those around him he soon realized he didn’t really have a choice in the matter, and with someone pushing him towards the scene he let out a groan before heading there. “PLEASE don’t slap me,” he almost flinched when the announcer moved, the sight of the LAST wheel event right before his eyes—it seemed extremely painful and not something Felix was curious enough to try. Ever, really.

            After the announcer rolled his eyes at the tall grown man fidgeting, Felix finally reached out, took a breath, and spun the cursed wheel. 

TASK: get ordained, perform a wedding ceremony at town hall; otherwise, ten hours locked inside the haunted house.

            “Oh, you HAVE to be kidding me.” He wasn’t a huge fan of weddings, save for his own, but being locked up in a house filled with spirits? No, thank you. “UGH, fine, w h a t e v e r.” He refrained from searching for his wife, from letting his eyes roam the crowd, but he knew she must have been having quite the ball seeing him in a position like that. Another couple of sighs, and Felix hopped off the ramp, without a rush dragging himself towards the hall. 

            Getting ordained was the EASY and quick, painless part. Painless. More like quickly ripping off a band aid, or plucking out a weird hair from one’s groin. The actual HARD part was only yet to begin, and as many of the same crowd began to gather, they could hear his groans and yells and ‘I’m not going to quote your fucking bible, Barbara’, and a lot of ‘NEXT!’, along with ‘What the fuck are you wearing? No, no, absolutely-FUCKING-not’, because if Felix was going to actually marry someone, it was someone who he didn’t absolutely despise. He must have looked like Gordon Ramsay of marriage, but annoyed to the very core he didn’t even stop to care. He wished he had spun out the bees, or even that slap he didn’t want at the beginning—he even considered the other option, but pulled himself together and walked out to his scene. 

            “Dear BELOVED... and blah, blah, blah—” a sigh, and he glared BACK at the groom, “No offense, but the last time someone looked at me like that, I got laid.” Felix paused, deep inhale and exhale—and stopped, looking around. “Where’s the wine? —OH, thanks.” He took the golden goblet with “Christ’s blood” or whatever they called it these days, and downed it in one go. Filled it up again, downed it. “Where are the rings?” He asked the man on his side in a whisper, and with his shrug, he just about lost it. “You had to have the fucking rings, Paul! ..God, this is going terribly.” He looked around, searching for a substitute for lost jewelry, a few sparkling little nothings in the bride’s hair catching his eye. Without asking he took them out, bent them here and there a little bit, murmuring cusses under his breath before aggressively rolling his eyes at Paul. Fuck Paul. 

               He raised his eyes to the crowd, for once, and a  breath got stuck in his mouth. Felix licked his lips, took a second before continuing, shaking his head softly. “I don’t know the words,” he admitted, the previous anger melting out into thin air, disappearing without a trace. If there was any, he suppressed it and directed it towards himself rather than people before him. It took only one glance at his wife’s face—catching it unexpectedly, without searching for it—and the charcoal hot needle peeled into his heart. “But honestly, you don’t need that,” he looked down at the makeshift rings in his hands, “Or rings, or fancy clothing—flowers, or even all of this,” spoke he, as he gestured vaguely towards the people watching. “What you need is EACH OTHER, and now you have that.” At the end his voice went a little quieter, Felix could feel his throat clogging up with his own emotions, and he handed the ‘rings’ to the pair. 

                       “By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife.”

                 And soon after his task was officially DONE, before the newlyweds could even turn around to say a word to him, Felix was gone from the hall without a trace.