Ahoy! @theparadoxpirate - Tumblr Blog

7dmom

I saw a diva moment buried in the sand

#PREV #7dmom #reblog

7dmom

I saw a diva moment buried in the sand

#7dmom #reblog

7dmom

I'm gonna. Tell everyone in the world how good and sweet and beautiful my haircut will look and then freak my whole head up badly. To test if I am loved for real

#7dmom #reblog

woeful-maiden

i had a dream where discord added a new “sex update” where you could declare you and a user were having sex and the menu to do so had dozens of dropdown selection menus for timespan, position, location, style, “flavorings”, and who was topping. what this would actually do is place whoever was set as the top to literally place their icon over yours and would set a timer. no one could message you and discord would autoreply with “sorry, these two users are busy right now! try messaging in [time remaining].” The issue is is that you, yourself, could not message anyone while having the discord sex, and this made me upset because immediately multiple people were setting me to having sex for 24 hours, thus locking me out of using the application and saying I was “busy with sixteen people”

#sex jokes #weird dreams #reblog

darkspaceboytoy

I just wish we’d had some way of knowing that the Nazi tattooed bigot who did mercenary work for Blackwater and was abusive to the women he had relationships with was a bad guy before he’d gotten this far. If only we’d had some sort of visual warning for who Graham Platner was. If only he might have had something on his body that could tell us he was no good, before we let him run this long. Hindsight’s 20 fucking 20 I guess though huh

minimosquitogirl

It’s so clear people don’t see people in the global south as real people. The only thing that’s changed since this information came out is that we found out he also victimized a white western woman. We already knew that he bragged about killing people in the global south, but that doesn’t matter because no one sees people in the global south as human.

#reblog

lonestatus

can we pretend that airships in the smoggy sky are like shooting stars? i could really use a fantastical contraption right now, fantastical contraption right now...

#paradox crewmates #reblog

exeggcute

one of my favorite this american life segments of late is about the people who played orchestra pit for phantom of the opera on broadway and how, like, a sizeable majority of them had literally been playing the show since it opened in 1988 (on broadway. I know it opened in 86 on the west end, you random pedants, but I am specifically talking about broadway musicians) because their contracts stipulated that they'd have jobs throughout the show's entire run... but nobody anticipated that phantom would become the longest-running broadway show of all time.

and none of these people wanted to walk away from a guaranteed job, so very few of them ever quit. they just kept doing the same show eight nights a week... for twenty or thirty years... and by the time it finally closed last year most of these musicians (who had been working together for DECADES) hated each other and really really fucking loathed phantom. I can't stop thinking about it. it's indescribably hellish to imagine but also the funniest thing I've ever heard in my life.

exeggcute

can you imagine.

bisexualshakespeare

[ID: excerpt from an article reading: One of my favorite stories, which should drive anyone who has every played in a band crazy-- there’s this bassoon player who has sat next to the same clarinet player since 1988. She’s convinced he plays half a note4 flat on every note he’s every played. He denies this. /]

cleverlittlefox

#partially described #FAVE POSTS #GOD. trapping all of these competent musicians in the eternal torture dungeon #music #musicals #paradox crewmates #reblog

lupusbaby

Say it with me! Wheelchairs aren’t sad! Mobility aids aren’t sad! Mobility aids are instruments of freedom!

goth-princess-gwennie

Forgive me if this is inappropriate but

So are

colostomy bags

Diapers

insulin pumps

Oxygen systems

Braces

cuntpunkop-ed

catheters

rollators

hearing aids

compression garments

prosthetics

FREEDOM AIDS

seraph1c-mo0n

- canes

- service animals

- noise cancelling headphones/ear defenders

- wheelchair attachments

- fidgets

IT’S DISABILITY PRIDE MONTH YALL

BE UNAPOLOGETICALLY DISABLED AND TAKE UP ALL THE SPACE AND TIME YOU NEED!!!!!

theparadoxpirate

[ID: An image of the disability pride flag. The flag consists of parallel red, yellow, white, light blue, and green stripes cutting diagonally across a grey background from the top left to the bottom right. /end ID]

#described #paradoxscribed #reblog #sorryyy if someone's already done this i couldn't see an alt id in the post or in an edited version of it

4e3076

hmm... this highly personal vent post seems like the perfect place to lay my roleplay egg...

#reblog

lupusbaby

Say it with me! Wheelchairs aren’t sad! Mobility aids aren’t sad! Mobility aids are instruments of freedom!

goth-princess-gwennie

Forgive me if this is inappropriate but

So are

colostomy bags

Diapers

insulin pumps

Oxygen systems

Braces

cuntpunkop-ed

catheters

rollators

hearing aids

compression garments

prosthetics

FREEDOM AIDS

seraph1c-mo0n

- canes

- service animals

- noise cancelling headphones/ear defenders

- wheelchair attachments

- fidgets

IT’S DISABILITY PRIDE MONTH YALL

BE UNAPOLOGETICALLY DISABLED AND TAKE UP ALL THE SPACE AND TIME YOU NEED!!!!!

#undescribed #reblog

pjackk

Can a smooth player see that ass jingle or should i go away forever

#ripjackk #reblog

meteorherd

hate when people are like “haha careless whisper is the stupid meme song” like shut up he’s literally NEVER gonna dance again. and you dont even care.

#music #reblog #sorry i'm looking for a very specific careless whisper post and reblogging all the other ones too

roseworth

careless whisper fucks so insanely hard and i will never forgive the internet for making it a "meme song." tonight the music seems so loud i wish that we could lose this crowd maybe its better this way we'd hurt each other with the things we want to say. if you even care.

#LEGITERALLY #music #reblog

so i've been replaying silksong and it's been great! it's really awesome to see how i've improved since first picking up the game. but i AM getting a little 🤏 frustrated because these things keep getting in my way while i'm trying to third wheel for a gay couple

[ID: An image of a Grand Reed from Hollow Knight: Silksong. It is a tall, anthropomorphic, insect-like creature wielding a bow used for playing string instruments. Its head is entirely obscured by a cloth covering, and it has metal shoulder pads for armor. /end ID]

#described #paradoxscribed #for context: i'm just about ready to fight the cogwork dancers but the hallways leading to the arena are COVERED in these fuckers #silksong #theparadoxpirate originals #-paradox (any pronouns)