The Perihelions

System trying to get by DID

[lost-diaries-system]

Okay to reblog!

Please don't repost!

[oops-all-syscourse]

“You want your system to be medicalised?”

YES oh my god yes I want to actually get help and have the government pay for it are you serious

[the-jukebox-system]

welcome to being a system trauma-holder!

it's great, we got:

constant triggers from out of nowhere, be it that one random note in a song that you can't figure out the reasoning of, OR a photo you looked at for a split second!

eye contact bad. no

don't touch me, but also the definition of touch-starved

can recall a negative memory from childhood in 0.2 seconds but stares off into the void in confusion when told about literally any other memory

every song now gives you a flashback! yaaaay

don't even get me started on a sudden octave change in someone's voice that somehow also manages to be a trigger

you KNOW that there's a memory somewhere that's being set off by this ONE thing but you can't FIND IT

*weird thing happens, furthering the trigger and therefore uncovering the rest of the memory* o h .

your brain (or alters) randomly decided to mention a very specific event from your childhood as a casual thing 'cause why not, and now you're seemingly stuck in what feels like 2011 and you can't. get back out

"where are we again??? 2004??" when you weren't even BORN in 2004

*looks at a certain photograph for exactly one second* oh no

breaking down over missing your mom when there's likely no reason to even miss her at all, only to realize you actually miss just having a parent figure in general

"hey do you remember playing [blank] as a kid?" proceeds to stare off into the void, confused out of their mind. wh a t are they talking about

"when did that happen?" proceeds to lists off the exact time/date it happened, how old you were, and any general context in seconds

I want to hold this plush but I also don't because the texture of the fur alone will likely set off a memory

certain names = bad

don't look at me

hey could you maybe not raise your voic- okay then

aAAAAAAAAAAA

it's 3 AM and I've been reliving the same memories on loop for the past week thanks to our own playlists on spotify. what am I doing

where are we™

getting very used to always feeling in danger around the people you currently live with, so you're now hesitant to move out since you think it'll always end up the same

endless fight-or-flight. thank you ptsd

constantly comparing things you encounter both irl and online to a certain event in your life and seeming like you just can't let something go

when in reality you just haven't forgotten it

every night is crying hours™

so here are the pros:

you remember everything

and here are some of the cons!:

you remember everything

[theperihelionsystem]

Last episode of DID system watches Moon Knight and comments in a single post instead of spam posting.

“Failed” protector syndrome is so sad and relatable. Poor Marc. That feeling sucks.

I feel like they’re really celebrating this “see, we got you, Marc is the real one haha” but instead of that we could have had "they’re both the real ones and Marc is just as valid as Steven not more so

HAHA the mid hug switch about how great Layla looks is so freaking cute

I like that they improved their communications and became able to share skills. While obviously we don’t have ninja fight abilities we’ve found that this sort of strength-exchange with communication improvement is realistic

WELL hello person number 3. We love to see the outpouring of alters once any communication occurs. Big mood.

Okay so now their back in the hospital? So maybe just this room is their inner world? Or is it mystical weirdness. Ugh I dislike that this line isn’t more clear.

Okay and I guess that’s it?

Oh Hi Jake.

I have mixed feelings

8/10 for being a good show

7/10 for DID awareness

4/10 for DID acceptance

[theperihelionsystem]

Alright it seems like Episode 5 of this lil watch through is gonna be pretty triggering but imma do my best. Moon Knight, ep 5. Did system reaction. Here we go

Oh a little trama. You can have a lil. As a snack.

This is what I was talking about. Where is the line between super hero/death weirdness and mental health? Because it’s making the mental health seem like weirdness.

The medical abuse is definitely triggering.

Okay so scratch the inner world stuff. Just mystical death. Disappointing, but I love the hippo lady.

Okay, exploring the life of the body? Dangerous and scary for someone with DID. Like this is the worst thing I can think of having to do.

OH BROTHER

This is a pretty horrible thing to happen and definitely the sort of traumatic event that could cause DID. Parents are horrible.

Mom accusing him of doing this on purpose. Terrifying and triggering.

Good on Marc for holding Dad accountable for not supporting him through mom’s abuse. I struggle a lot with not holding my mom accountable for allowing my fathers abuse.

It would be so cool if we could stop using the word Broken

Oh that trigger that sends Marc into the meltdown based on a flashback? Straight into Denial? This is an honest relatable DID moment

Steven remembering some things even tho he cannot place them is great. CHILD SWItCH hell yeah.

Steven, confirmed introjection. But also if we could not be like “Marcs the real one”

Physical abuse bad thank you

Oof one persons real one is made up I don’t like that

Steven also triggered into immediate meltdown makes sense

Oh double RIP Steven I guess.

[theperihelionsystem]

People with DID watch Moon Knight live react part 4? Sure.

“Are you in love with my wife” is a GREAT DID joke because it’s at the expense of the alters as people not do the system as a whole.

Not a DID thing but damn Layla has extremely strong finger tips.

The casual taunting from Marc is great.

Okay yelling at one alter because you want to trigger the other out is horrible. Please never do it. But also Layla this is not the time.

Okay I’m very confused immediately.

So is Steven Grant an introject?

Oh. I assume this is an inner world? We do hate the “mental hospital” setting but. Cleaner than any psychiatric facility we’ve ever been to.

Oh, Layla’s here. Is she an NPC or is this not an inner world, just a dream?

Okay and here’s Harrow. Honestly the setting is a lil too clear and crisp for me to relate if it’s supposed to be inner world. But it’s definitely giving “Marc is the real one” which I don’t love.

More personality language. And it’s so unnecessary. Everything Harrow says is such psychiatric gobbledegook.

Oh there you are Steven. I’m so glad they had a little hug moment that’s a cute.

Who is in that other sarcophagus, boys? I love it. Ignoring that shit immediately is such a DID mood.

[theperihelionsystem]

Episode 3 of moon knight and It is growing on me

Love that we’re seeing Marcs side

OKAY alter number 3 we love to see it. The speed with which they moved on from that is such a DID mood. It’s not that it’s not important, it’s that interfacing with that sort of information is ROUGH

Alright so not DID related but just moving the moon? Hysterical.

Personality language ain’t it in this day and age.

I wish they didn’t have to talk out loud to communicate. Another cinematic conceit giving us another bad public perception.

As a person with DID, it’s hard for me to identify some of the lines between DID/Superpower avatar. So I can only imagine it’s even harder for your average joe. This is the biggest thing that frustrates me about this story of content.

The humor of fronting cause you totally believe you can resolved the situation best and then not being able to handle it and begging someone to take back over is peak DID.

The switch in the desert was nice because it wasn’t dramatized but damn they’re efficient for a newly discovered system

Turn back the sky? Dude I feel like you could google it.

[theperihelionsystem]

Okay this is now a commentary based on Moon Knight episode 2.

The mirror thing? Horrible, I wish. It would stop.

Steven assuming he’s possessed? Classic DID.

Immediately hoping to medicate the other person away? Yeah it happens.

I don’t love the “go to sleep thing”

“The little American man living inside of me” is how we think of each other and I love it.

Being awake and near the front but not able to do anything is a mood

Oof the "person is the body is strong” thing is horrible

But it does take effort to stay in front when you’re not in control so I like that

[theperihelionsystem]

Finally watching Moon Knight.

The first 6 seconds were super triggering but we made it through.

We were begging them not to do the mirror thing but they did it anyway. I get that it’s a really easy was to cinematically represent alters communicating but I wish Hollywood would stop with that. That’s just not how it works.

The switches in the majority of the first episode were reasonable if extremely quick. But the last one? The lights, the drama - it was a lot.

I get that they are making a super hero show, so they’re gonna be over the top. But I’m gonna complain anyway .

[toastbutteregg]

[auraquartzchaostime-deactivated]

Shout out to the mfs in our system that formed and then just absolutely disappeared- I have no idea where you guys went but I hope youre having a good time

[sysboxes]

Like/Reblog if you save or use!

[thesfam]

DID Gothic pre diagnosis

1.) You have chores to. You get up, and walk towards the kitchen. But then it gets foggy. You feel stuck, you dissapear. You want to fight it, but how can you battle such drowsiness? Your gone. When you finally come to, the dishes are done and dried. You look down and see that youve changed. You go back to your bedroom and find your other wet shirt. You never touched the dishes.

2.) Sometimes you never feel like yourself. Your skills come and go. One day you drew the most beautiful art piece, others you can speak another language. Your friends complement you on your skills. They claim your so talented. They ask you to draw them a picture. You try, but a circle is as far as you get. These skills never stick around for long. Where do they go?

3.) You like saying "we". I seems to pretentious. Like its dosnt encapsulate all of yourself. Others call you out for it. "We?" They say. You nod. "Whose we?" You shrug. They laugh at the silliness. You laugh too. You dont know. Know body knows.

4.) Sometimes you cry. Panic takes over and fear consumes you. You sob on the floor. You feel 12 again. You clutch your cheat as your body burns. You feel people touching you. Hands are everywhere yet no one is in your room. Your body burns. You wish it to stop.

5.) Dont you ever wish you were someone else?" A friend asks. You think about this. "Yes." You say.

Being someone else would be nice, but you don't even know who you are. There are many different "people" in you. But your yourself, just multifaceted. Everyone else surely want to be themselves? Another person from in your mind. They appear next to you in your head. A safe place alace in your mind.

"I'm who you want to be," she says. "I'm who you escape from." 

[siphonophore-collective-deactiv]

[addictivities]

Do you ever go “ wow ok” and shut down entirely

[webkinzpossum]

simply here to vibe

[apricity-system]