indefinite hiatus✘ ᴵ ᵀᴿᵁˢᵀ ᵞᴼᵁ ✘

I ᴡᴀs ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ᴏɴʟʏ sᴏɴ ᴀɴᴅ I ᴛʀɪᴇᴅ... Tʀɪᴇᴅ... Tʀɪᴇᴅ...﹗ indie selective josh washington roleplay blog. penned by bluez. est november 5th, 2016

[maskcaged]

ᴶᵁˢᵀ ᶜᴸᴼˢᴱ ᵀᴴᴱ ᴰᴼᴼᴿ;  ᴮᴱ ˢᵀᴵᴸᴸ ᴹᵞ ᴴᴱᴬᴿᵀ 

                                              ⁽ᶤᵗ'ˢ ᵃˡˡ ᶜᵒᵐᶤᶰᵍ ᵇᵃᶜᵏ ᵗᵒ ᵐᵉˑˑˑ⁾

[evanqelic]

S.P.I.R.I.T ; spirit, let’s hear it.

[boutella]

I used to spend a lot of time alone as a kid, creating characters and doing voices in my room, and I thought to myself, I’m either going to go absolutely nuts, or I’m going to find something to put that energy into.

[tragedybuilt-deactivated2017032]

gothicprep:

no offense but I’ve never gotten over anything that’s happened to me in my life

[anshelinasholie]

not to be dramatic but being yelled at makes me suicidal

[thepsvcho-blog]

Mike: it's over we survived until dawn

* Everyone motioning to the Wendigo behind him*

Mike: No, I'm not even gonna look because we made it

[thepsvcho-blog]

dustwalk

@thepsvcho ; continued from here  !!

she lifts her eyebrows, lips curling into a smile. he was so close she could feel the warmth of his breath.   “   oh, no.   ”   she did, however, find pleasure in his nervous chuckle, feeling her heart racing at the closeness between them.   “   what ⏤ did you consider kissing me? i mean, admittedly, it is a mistletoe and i do look pretty cute tonight, so i totally understand.   ”   she added, an attempt at joking to lighten the tension. yet, her cheeks flushed. of course they did. a natural reaction to her heart beating so fast she bet even he could hear it. 

  She did look cute. But she always sort of did. Even before he had gotten closer with her, when she was just Hannah’s best friend. He always found her to be cute. Now that she was the only person that really seemed to understand him at all, well let’s just say it may have gone beyond that. Which wasn’t true. It wasn’t like Josh had a crush on Sam. He didn’t get those. They were just friends. But would a kiss mess that up? Was she blushing? Shit, he was too. How embarrassing. He got the smallest bit closer, his lips almost touching hers. “I mean... It’s tradition, right?” God, he hoped he didn’t sound as nervous as he thought he did. If she seemed to react poorly to how their lips are ALMOST touching, he could play it off as a joke. 

[thepsvcho-blog]

.

[thepsvcho-blog]

@beaniebabied (Continued)

  What did he actually hope to accomplish here? With his words? He had done something awful. Josh had always had highs and lows, but it wasn’t like he had ever made any mistakes like this before. He had punched her and he had just been so... Angry that she messed up his plan. His perfectly calculated plan... Now that he was on the anti-psychotics the entire thing seemed downright insane. Isn’t that what he was? Crazy? That’s not something that goes away. Not ever. He had made her think he was dead. She probably blamed herself. He had made he think there were ghosts. He made her navigate the dark (she was scared of the dark, wasn’t she?) and ended up almost getting everyone killed. People had died. It was all his fault. Even if doctors tried to tell him otherwise. He was sick. That’s what they said. B u l l s h i t. Bull-fucking-shit.. It was his fault. 

  The pills to get numb? He did know feelings. At first, he’s offended she would even say that. Josh let his feelings control him. The pills only numbed it when he took too much. Until he decided to stop taking them. What had he even been thinking? The pills, the drinking, the lying. God... He didn’t even know who that was. But it was him. And nothing would ever take that away. Ever. He was passed out that night. He did blame himself for a long time. He could hear them blaming him in his head. He could even see them, clear as day. His justice? Why did he... what? He had been wrong in what he did. Maybe it would have been better for him to die out there in the mines. He didn’t get punished really. No prison time. No proof of what he did aside from testimonies from his friends. Even so, he got off with a ‘he’s crazy’. He wanted to cry but he felt too numb, too cold. He wanted to argue, but she was right. 

  “Why didn't I what?” He asked. “Ashley... I know I can never... Ever undo it.” She’s crying and it’s his fault. Everything is his fault. He should kill himself. Not with pills or anything. Violently. Slowly. Something that hurt. Maybe that would bring them closure. Punishment. “Why didn’t I die? Ashley, you’re still a kid... Someday, I know you’ll be happy again.” I hope. He knew he would never be. If he would have died instead of his sisters, everything would be better. If he would have been stillborn or died as a child, nobody would be hurt. He deserved everything bad that happened to him. 

  “Take care of yourself.” He is already planning the best way to punish himself. If anything, Ashley was right. Where was his justice? If the law wouldn’t give it to him, he’d have to do it himself. “Sorry.” He’s write a note or something and explain. At least they’d know he regretted it. He was a psychopath or something, right? That’s the only way he could do something so awful. He couldn’t breathe.  

[hurtspeople-a-blog]

//so my depression is awful today and I’m just like unable to deal with human beings atm after work and shit so I’m not gonna be on here at all today. I know I’m doing bad here, but it’s busy at work because of Christmas coming up and I always relapse in my depression around October-February. So I’m like having an existential crisis. if any of yall wanna add me on skype I’m musxngs. Just hmu with you url. I might be able to chat there a little but yeah, I can’t focus on anything rn.

[glassgirls]

when ur mental health is shit and ur room turns into a McFucking Mess

[thepsvcho-blog]

me yesterday: totally gonna be active and do stuff today

me today: goes to dr early in the morning

me today: spends $30 on bullshit because i don't want to be alone and my house is currently empty

me today: gets home and eats

me today: sits on bed for two hours feeling depressed and miserable and overthinking shit

me today: sleeps for 3 hours\

me today: watches two hours of mr robot

me today: goes back to crippling depression followed by emptiness

[mythclogies]

has anyone else seen the psa that the parents of the sandy hook victims made?

[archive-asphyxiaticn-deactivate]

serotonia | highly suspect

[hurtspeople-a-blog]

//I’m going to bed. Should be more active tomorrow since I don’t have to work lol. 

[onceuponatime-blog]

[thepsvcho-blog]

Post game josh: my reaction

pre-wendigo/trapped in mines: there is pain. my poor sick and injured boy. he is dying and losing his mind. don't touch me i am hurt. my poor son is hurt.

wendigo josh: my son is at war with himself. omg he is trying so hard. but it doesn't hurt if he gives in. my son just wants to be numb. my poor son.

au where he is rescued: self hate. my poor child is so fucking sick. there he is avoiding life. why must he lock himself in his own mind? does he not think he deserves to recover? my POOR child. sure you did bad things, but the only way to fix things is to try. but there you go closing yourself off into your depressing bubble. my poor child. don't touch me i am hurting for him