"Disgusting." -Sasori

possesed by a feral gay homicidal puppet twink since 84 years

[dearakashi]

i've been posting a lot today but it's only because my brain is seiffected. just hear me out, alright?

so i've started to read the replace plus novel (thank you, @japeneselunchtimerush ) it just hit me how people say that sei is "intimidating" and generally minimize him to being scary and quite the "bad guy" of it but this is further proof that those types of perceptions are just completely wrong.

sei purposefully getting off at the wrong stop to carry an old lady's bag + nijimura confirming that he has a heart of gold. he really is the most reliable of the bunch. i wonder if he got in trouble for arriving home later.

sei literally saving a baby from getting ran over. and then minimizing it by saying that anyone could have done it. can you start valuing yourself, for the love of god???

++bonus !!

« even if akashi is choking under the weight of expectations, as long as he has basketball and friends that will play alongside him...i'm sure he can overcome it.» sei... :((

[knb-incorrect]

Akashi's Father: What is wrong with you?

Akashi: Many, many things...

Akashi: And most of them are your fucking fault.

[vivicella]

god please bring our family back together

[cemetery14]

Can't wait til I get too s3

Gonna make a comp of akashis cuntiest moments 👑

[active-mind-15]

His elbow pass is already like top 2 of those moments and I don't take criticism on that

[japeneselunchtimerush]

In my opinion one of THE cuntiest moments was when he dunked on kagami and kiyoshi and basically said "did you think that was a move solely for tall people?"

[active-mind-15]

THAT WAS MY TOP MOMENT TOO AHHHHH

[kurokonobrainrot]

I love thinking about the miracles casually mentioning the wild shit that happened during middle school in front of their high school teams.

Kise : Oh this remind me of the time when we got involved with jewelry store thieves during a festival. Momoi accidentally took possession of their loot.

Kaijo : Excuse me, what ??

____

Murasakibara : I love this flavor of maiubo, Mido-chin once stopped a robber on a scooter by throwing the exact same box at him.

Yosen : A driving scooter ?? From afar ?? Ha ha you must be joking, this level of accuracy and strength isn't possible-

Murasakibara : Yeah he ruined my maiubo...

Yosen : THAT'S NOT THE ISSUES HERE WTF

____

Kuroko : A couple contest ? This brings back memory, we once participate in a couple contest with my friends from Teiko.

Seirin : You mean the miracles ? As couples ?

Kuroko : Yes, i was paired with Akashi-kun as the wolf and red ridding hood

Seirin : Haha, Akashi as the wolf i can imagine that.

Kuroko : No i was the wolf. Half of them had to cross-dress.

Seirin : Wait seriously, do you have pictures ?? Hey don't disappear finish the story first !!

Kuroko will not finish the story, he will keep the mystery going for as long as he can.

___

Aomine : Don't be crybaby you can play with a sprained wrist, Haizaki did it all the time after Nijimura beat the shit out of him.

Too : Come again ??

___

Momoi : Akashi has been spotted saving a baby's life by catching them with lightning fast reflexes before his stroller collide with a truck once.

Too : I refuse to believe that

Momoi : Are you saying MY informations and data gathering are incorrect ? :)

___

Akashi and Midorima probably have the craziest stories and they'll be unnecessarily vague about it.

Murasakibara casually dropping Teiko lore to his teammates happens a lot in this Drama audio (He mostly talked about Akashi, because of course he would) and this is honestly once of the funniest one.

I should probably make a separate post about it because it truly is a masterpiece and it 100% deserves it

[active-mind-15]

Nah fr the canon Teiko lore is so fucking unhinged but since all of the Teiko gang are kind of insane it doesn't surprise me that these stories are more like boring/mundane anecdotes to them

[kurokonobrainrot]

MidoAka cooking the perfect snack together will forever be one of my favorite Midoaka moments. Murasakibara, Midorima and Akashi were truly inséparable in middle school. And the fact that under Akashi's supervision Midorima manage to cook something ?? Incredible.

Now we need a spin off where Akashi cooks with Riko and Momoi and the whole time it's just an internal battle inside his head between trying to be gentleman and not make them feel bad about themselves and trying to stop them from liting a fire in the kitchen and poison their friends.

Also to the question 'who allowed them to do their experiment there' Akashi is Teiko's golden child he can do whatever he want at any time and no one will stop him.

[active-mind-15]

Akashi doing damage control for Riko and Momoi sounds awful. I know he'd be going insane and may have to call in reinforcements because when he goes to stop Momoi from doing one thing then Riko is on the other side of the kitchen doing another thing and it drives him crazy. 😭

[cemetery14]

the only thing that could break akashi

[kurokonobrainrot]

He would start to wish he had two bodies to go with his two personnalities.

But also he wouldn't trust Bokushi not to be rude to them because Bokushi has zero fucks to give, if you annoy him he will let you know. But Oreshi is a people pleaser and the idea of people thinking he is mean keeps him awake at night.

This is why he need Bokushi, someone gotta say 'he asked for not pickles' and it sure as hell isn't going to be Oreshi.

[japeneselunchtimerush]

It's so funny because Bokushi would not care what those two were doing. Here's just here to cook and have a good time.

There's a psp storyline where momoi is going to make food for kuroko and kagami and akashi walks in and says he will help her. By help her he means cook next to her without saying a word it's so funny.

He even wears a cute lil apron(when I find the picture I will put it here)

At the end when kuroko and kagami try the food(as expected akashi's tasted great and momois was straight from hell) they confront him about it and he just says that if he had intervened it would not have been momoi's cooking.

I see him doing the same thing here

[active-mind-15]

I'm screaming he did not give a single fuck huh 😭😭😭

[active-mind-15]

Re-listening to the Teiko festival drama CD, one thing I am so happy they added that wasn't present in the manga comic is the fact that Akashi was winning so many prizes after challenging all the different tabletop game clubs that he put them in a sack that he was carrying around the school. A spectator even called him Santa Claus because the bag was so stuffed with prizes. And the sack got so heavy that Akashi literally had to stop challenging clubs otherwise he wouldn't be able to drag the sack around anymore with all the extra prizes he'd win.

[wornout-pinkscarf]

There’s levels to the mental illness game

[active-mind-15]

BRO 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[cemetery14]

We know akashi works out on his off days (I don't remember the exact working but our first time seeing him the the dude was like "wow he's so dedicated and pushes himself so hard" or somtning like that)

I think akashi is shockingly strong

Just imagine nebuya not being able to open a jar, than akashi opens it no problem

Miracles go play that one punching game and akashi doubles aomines score

[active-mind-15]

This is another headcanon I had that I forgot to post, but not only is Akashi canonically really strong and likely has incredible stamina, but I feel like he actually knows how to fight, too. He just chooses not to.

Cuz I think about his confrontation with Haizaki when Akashi ordered him to quit the basketball team, and Haizaki grabbed him and pretty much lifted him off the ground by his collar. Akashi was heavily unfazed and somehow still in control of the conversation despite everything.

In my head, I like to think that if Akashi wanted to punch him, he very well could have. But he's not one to resort immediately to violence and will only pull it out if he absolutely has to defend himself.

[kurokonobrainrot]

It's so funny how Akashi's got a whole collection of pinning senpais. Nijimura, Mibuchi, Mayuzumi, Nash. He truly always wins.

[japeneselunchtimerush]

THEY LOOK SO HAPPY TO SEE HIM😭😭😭😭😭😭

That's their akashi seijuro guys they dgaf which one it is. That's THEIR akashi.

[wsknbfanaccnt]

UGHHHH BROOO😭😭😭

no cuz Sei was so like worried about what would happen if he switched knowing their history and I FUCKING LOVE THE FACT THAT THEY DON'T EVEN REALLY CONSIDER BOKUSHI AS A DIFFERENT PERSON

cuz like especially that's what actually happens with DID. they changed the name from multiple personality disorder to disassociate identity disorder because multiple personality implies that there are more than one person inside a body, but in reality the personalities are actually fragments of a whole person.

also when Kuroko said "Akashi-kun is Akashi-kun" AND THE LOOK ON HIS FACE WHEN SEI HEARS THAT I'M GOING TO CRYYYYYY

and like in this sense, it doesn't seem like they ever truly considered bokusei their enemy, nor they're upset with him for what happened

UGH I'm dead

[active-mind-15]

I really wish we saw a convo take place after the Winter Cup on screen/page. Like I wish Akashi could explain everything and be reassured his friends won't leave him because of the things he did out of desperation to keep the team together. Instead, I have to go to AO3 for that type of extra content because Fujimaki didn't have the BALLS to give Akashi proper closure, and I will always be salty about it.

[japeneselunchtimerush]

TAGS ARE SO REAL!!!

[japeneselunchtimerush]

AKASHI LOVES NIGOU CANON!!!!and midoaka friendship

So basically the scene starts off with akashi entering the library and seeing midorima looking at a shogi board. Akashi asks him why and he says "I was feeling nostalgic"(THATS SO CUTE HE MISSED PLAYING SHOGI WITH AKASHI)

Then akashi(looking just as nostalgic) said that midorima often kept him company in middle school. He then asks midorima whether he wants to play shogi with him(AKASHI MISSED HIM TOO MIDOAKA FRIENDSHIP STILL GOING STRONG)

So while they were playing shogi nigou barges into the room and akashi and nigou had such a cute interaction it was so adorable.

Akashi: "Nice to meet you, Number 2."

Nigou: "Woof!"

Akashi: "...You can answer properly? What a good dog."

Akashi: "Come on."(he lifts nigou onto his lap)

Nigou: "woof!"

Akashi: "You don't seem to mind sitting on my lap... there you go."

Nigou: "Woof!"

Akashi: "You're pretty used to people."

Then izuki comes looking for nigou and akashi says "look nigou, someone's come to pick you up."

IM GOING INSANE HES SO NICE TO NIGOU HE LOVES DOGS SO MUCH PASS IT ON

[active-mind-15]

WAIT WAIT WAIT WHAT IS THIS CUTENESS

[cemetery14]

the times that akashi can go around and absolutely obliterate club presidents and adults at table top games, are some of his happiest moments i swear

hes found a way where he can allow himself to be extra sadistic without being terrible for it

its like a little treat for him <3

[kurokonobrainrot]

Yeah it's like, in basketball he can't brag too much because of sportmanship, but table top games ? Nothing is going to stop him from being really smug about it.

It's great that he realize that what he is doing is impressive enough to brag about it a little

[japeneselunchtimerush]

Look at how smug he looks when he defeats that other guy. I love him sm

Also a dragon on a yukata is a reference to the yakuza in Japan lmao(I think I saw this in another translation)

[kurokonobrainrot]

For real, he is the ultimate little shit, look at him

'To think this is the ability of the president...' Akashi has no chill sometimes

Also 'Our Midorima' ? Why the possession ? The miracles be normal about each other challenge

[japeneselunchtimerush]

"Our Midorima" they're so normal about eachother.

Also can we talk about how akashi won the chess match with his eyes closed?! Boy was so bored because he couldn't get a challenge that he decided to shut his eyes and he still one.

"By the way, that's checkmate" he's so savage.

[kurokonobrainrot]

Have so much respect for Midorima, he had to deal with this everydays for almost 3 years and he never punched him in the face, not even once. Truly worthy of admiration.

It's funny how Midorima is suscribed to annoying best friends who will drive hom crazy

[active-mind-15]

The best part of this Teiko festival anecdote is the Drama CD addition of Akashi carrying around a bag full of his prizes that is so big that other festival-goers nickname him Santa Claus. Also that fact that he won so many prizes that he had to stop challenging other clubs because he physically couldn't carry the bag anymore.

[cemetery14]

AAAAAAAAAAAA

YEAH his whole world kinda IS BREAKING

[active-mind-15]

I thought I was the only one

[dearakashi]

does he know that he's alive

[japeneselunchtimerush]

His expression and the way his fist is almost clenched makes me want to say something angsty and ruin everyone's day

[cemetery14]

Akashi sending a pic of himself in the gc with this text

[moonlit-doodles]

i made my housemate watch the kurobasu movie with me last night in celebration of akashi's birthday

[active-mind-15]

Akashi during Extra/Last Game

[ddoe-eyes]

kuroko no basket is like. all the adults in our life failed us. but for awhile it was ok because we got to walk home together. no one sees me but you do. i love this thing so much but i hate it for not saving me. i think he's going to save me or i'm going to save him. i'm crying at the literal crossroad of my childhood then crying with joy at the start of the rest of my life. hey you inspire me and i resent you for it. hey do you want to get milkshakes. hey the idea of losing all of you split me in two also i have a trauma disorder. i'm going to ruin myself to give you a win. i'm going to win so you'll come back. i'm going to win because then we'll all be able to sit and have dinner together. it's about a comeback but there's no such thing as a quick comeback in basketball.