The Limeburner's Daughter

Katie Matlin. Something of a realist, something of a dreamer. I neither strive nor settle for anything less than unparalleled perfection. My personal cup of coffee comprises a carefully brewed mixture of blind devotion and endless ambition. If you play your cards right, there's a chance that you might end up in my good books. Disclaimer: I'm not Chloe Rose or Katie Matlin, but you know, I wish I were both.

[thesoccerstar]

Text to: Girl who enjoys my pain.

Adam: I didn't say that. It seems as if you have a habit of twisting my words. Act what way? You're really going to have to specify instead of leaving me in the dark here. I don't know I just.. You stopped coming around, I had to say something, I didn't mean to start some sort of fight. I don't really know why you think that, it definitely wasn't better for me. Possibly for you.. I guess. I'm having a hard time processing why it'd be so hard for you, I said impulsively said something idiotic. Forget about it. Weird?.. I don't get why my having feelings for you is so ..foreign. Because of that reason alone. Are all girls as indecisive as you or is it a personally squirted trait? You always have Andrew to talk to, I'm not a necessity.

Katie: I wasn't trying to twist your words around. I simply went off on what you implied. Forget it. Except you really didn't /have/ to say anything. If I had continued to come over, Drew, you, and I would've hung out and at some point, he would've figured that something was amiss between the two of us. I really don't want to think about how he'd react if he ever found out the truth. Stop making foolish assumptions. It wasn't any better or worse for me; I was just used to it. Unless you tell me that you didn't mean of any of what you said or no longer feel that way towards me, I can't let it go. So tell me. It just got stranger after you told me that you'd been feeling that way for months. I can't explain it. Right, but what if that reason wasn't a predisposing factor? Yeah, because that's Drew's favorite activity. Talking.

[thesoccerstar]

text ☆ imogen

Imogen: It's a bit challenging to not read into it for a million different reasons, but I'm trying.

Imogen: I beg your pardon?

Imogen: If that's what you want or need, but you're going to have to help me come up with some valid excuse.

Katie: That's all I ask of you.

Katie: Maybe you could tell her that you need to go see your father for a day?

Katie: Thank you, by the way. For all of this.

[thesoccerstar]

text ☆ imogen

Imogen: Fine, but I don't know what you're getting at, though, and I don't like this one bit. I don't understand why you're being all secretive. Being evasive is kind of my thing. And I'm even more confused by the whole not talking thing.

Imogen: Okay, let me come up with an excuse or something to talk to Fiona.

Katie: I'd like some company today. That's all there is to it; you don't have to read into it any further than that.

Katie: Will you be staying over?

[thesoccerstar]

Text to: Girl who enjoys my pain.

Adam: I really only bother stating those things because that's how you act. I'm not meaning accuse you actually feeling that way, but it's how you're coming off regardless. Even if, I feel like I have the right to be. So what? We were suppose to just absently continue on with our lives like nothing had ever happened? Like we never existed to each other? I don't know about you, but I'm not too content with that either. Don't pull out the best friend card, it'll get old too quickly. Exactly the reason I didn't tell you for so long, and it also pairs up as a reason why we should forget I ever said anything. It'd be different if I were in your shoes, and we both know why. Was that last part a joke? You just said.. I..

Katie: I was being honest, but I'm guessing that's a quality that's no longer welcome? I really hate it when you start to act that way. After everything that happened, how in the world can you tell me that we would've been better off confronting our problems? We never seem to be able to come to a fixed solution, and I just figured that avoiding it was the best option for the both of us. I'm not going to apologize for that. You know perfectly well that I'm not going to be able to forget about it any more than you are. It's just... it's weird. Why would things be different? Um, no, I sort of missed having you around and despite everything, you're still my favorite person to talk to.

[thesoccerstar]

text ☆ imogen

Imogen: Define necessary? You are aware you're going to have to give me one eventually. I may be being a bit lenient now, but i expect something. I don't know whether to be insulted or complimented by the fact you have no one else.

Imogen: Your house? I haven't been to your house in... six years.

Katie: Can you just not be /you/ for a day? I'm really not in the mood for this right now. And why's that? Why do you think I owe you an explanation? The last thing I want to do right now is talk and that's exactly why I need you.

Katie: I should've clarified, my bad. I meant my apartment.

[thesoccerstar]

Text to: Girl who enjoys my pain.

Adam: It's always nice to know you're numb to generally feelings, or rather anything about me. So ignoring me whenever possible was your definition of smoothly? Honestly? All you had to do was forget what I said, it was as simple as that. You're the one who isn't letting it go. Your need to think about it or have concern for my well being in the situation isn't necessary, I can handle it myself. Just like I have been. Yes, that's it. This is probably the third time you've said this to me, so.. What's the point anymore?

Katie: This is exactly why I haven't felt much of an inclination to talk to you lately. You just start to become incredibly self-deprecating as far as this topic's concerned. Well, it was a lot smoother than confronting it and having this conversation. If you had been in my place, would you really have forgotten about it? You're—or were—one of my best friends, Adam. To top it all off, my boyfriend just so happens to be your brother. It's not as easy to forget as you think it is. Fine, whatever you say. I don't know. I want to keep talking to you, though.

[thecaptaincurfew-blog]

We can debate this until the end of time and I’ll still stand by my word in saying that you’re wrong. I’ll get one to you bright and early, don’t you fret. Funny, I could easily say the same of you. For reasons that remain unknown, you fight with me tooth and nail without fail. It is actually impressive, no matter how misguided it may be. That’s complete and utter bullshit, we both know it so please save that line for someone who will actually be daft enough to buy it. Always the picture of maturity, of course. You’ve got a long way to go before you can even begin to make a dent in this process, actually. I understand the definition of it but you aren’t—by any means—an example of it. I’m not giving you any flowers or any other present. I’m not going to reward your behavior so you can feel free to let go of that deluded grip you have. It’s of no use to you now. Uh huh, sure. A likely story. I figured that you would. I’m sure you’ll be able to make quick work of subbing one of them in. That’s quite an array of candidates. From the sound of it, you really can’t go wrong since they’re all allegedly better than I am. You just can’t let go of me, can you? Here you have the perfect opportunity to cut ties and free yourself yet you’re willing to sacrifice and take up the futile mission of changing me. I never claimed not to be. And that’s the problem right there. You would do well to actually put forth some effort in changing that. It seems to be our shtick so I’m sure we won’t lose sight of it. That wasn’t the case. Of course, I was completely stunned to hear that but it wasn’t grounds for me to want to put an end to our friendship. I handled the situation horribly, I know that. I think we could do it. Already we’ve been falling into step like we used to and that’s promising. It’s fine; it’s my own fault. What we need is a fresh start and I genuinely believe we’ve been carving one out for ourselves as of late.

Point is, I don’t have to take any part in this cult of yours and that’s all I could really ask for. Modesty? Hmm, I’ll need to search that word up later. I’m always going to put a fight, that’s just how I am. You’ll get by well enough, you always do. I’m practically beaming with pride as we speak. I’d say that’s a smart trade. Aiden makes for far better company than I do. You’ll still be able to get your paws on Cece’s brownies through Aid so it all works out for you. I’ve had them since the dawn of time. There’s nothing wrong with Katie nor is there anything wrong with having a nickname. Kat, Kates, it’s all the same to me for you. Some things aren’t lost to time, we’re a prime example of that and I know it makes you relieved to see it.

[thesoccerstar]

And I still maintain that I'm right, so I suppose we've reached an impasse. Once again. This is just downright pitiful. You're not allowed to impersonate a doctor, mind you. Now that you mention it, I'm really starting to doubt whether I'd be able to hold a conversation with you if we weren't arguing throughout large chunks of it. What do we talk about when we're not arguing? Your phrasing's remarkably tricky. I almost got my hopes up for my hundredth compliment of the day, but there go the balloons. For reasons I can't even begin fathom, you seem to be dead-set against facing facts. Do I have permission to knock some sense into you with a reasonably heavy book? That's what you think. It's actually started to kick in quite nicely. You're making your jealousy far too apparent. That is exactly why your replacements are much suited to be my friends. Aging has just made you meaner and I didn't think that that was possible to begin with. I'm holding on to you for exactly two reasons: 1) I can only imagine how terribly you'd fare without me and my quips, and 2) Refer back to point one and read it thoroughly. I expect a trophy in recognition of my selfless generosity. So would you, though. Let's face it, you're not exactly the definition of nice. Compared to you, I'm the truest saint there ever was. In other words, these ten years that we spent avoiding each other was the result of lack of communication? To be fair, it shouldn't have been a situation that you even needed to handle. Clearly, things would've been more or less different if I'd just kept quiet about it. I don't know. At this point, I think I'm just trying to convince myself that, more than anything else, our friendship deserves a second chance, as awfully sentimental as that might be. Shall I take it to mean that we're okay, then? 

Oh, please, you're acting as though I would've forced you into it otherwise. I doubt you'd be able to grasp the meaning, so it might be a futile attempt at best. A fight you're inevitably going to end up losing because I'm your opponent. Sometimes I forget how much of a jerk you are, but you're just so considerately punctual with the reminders. I give you an A plus. I wish I'd thought of this arrangement before we rekindled our friendship, what a shame. Speaking of Aiden, how are you dealing with the whole issue of him starting school? Better, I hope. Because you presented it to yourself. That doesn't count. As long as they make very rare appearances, we'll be fine. Besides, I'm sure I'm fighting a losing battle anyhow. A little bit. I did wonder if we'd ever get past that awkward teacher-parent phase. I prefer it when we're Eli and Katie far more than when we're Mr. Goldsworthy and Ms. Matlin. 

[thesoccerstar]

Text to: Girl who enjoys my pain.

Adam: And how exactly would you feel if I purposely dodged you at every turn? Like I said, I know you thought you were doing something good, but I still didn't appreciate it. It would be a lot less awkward if you stopped thinking about everything, the awkwardness wouldn't completely diminish but it'd help. I-- never mind, fine.

Katie: We've been avoiding each other for so long that I'm not sure I'd feel anything if you were to do that. In that case, I'm sorry you feel that way, but I'm still perfectly convinced that had it not been for this conversation, things would've unfolded smoothly. Pray tell, what exactly am I over-thinking here? If anything, I'm being realistic. Fine? That's it?

[thesoccerstar]

Text to: Girl who enjoys my pain.

Adam: So you chose to avoid me at all costs? They're only awkward because you overthink everything, and let it be. No not even remotely, but thanks for trying, I guess?

Katie: You make it sound like I did something unforgivable. I was trying to be considerate for your sake, that's all. It's awkward either way and you know it. Maybe we just shouldn't be friends at all. I mean, we're halfway there already, so we might as well make it conclusive.

[thesoccerstar]

Text to: Girl who enjoys my pain.

Adam: Is this little dance over? You're at my house less and less, and it seems like Drew is going out more and more. I'm not some fragile piece of glass that needs tip toeing around, you know. You might think you're being polite but in reality ignoring me doesn't help anything.

Katie: I didn't know what else to do. You can't deny that things are painfully awkward between us, and I was just trying to make things easier for you. Did it work?

[thesoccerstar]

text ☆ imogen

Imogen: You really have gone slightly insane. I always knew this day would come. Just thought it would be a lot later rather than sooner. But I'll humor you. I expect some sort of legitimate explanation. Especially considering how things turned out before...

Imogen: Well, Fiona's in town this weekend so that's kind of a challenge. Unless you want to meet me at the gallery when I have to go in?

Katie: Was any of that really necessary? If you're really expecting an explanation, then there's a reasonable chance that you're going to be disappointed. Look, this is just me asking you a favor because I don't have anyone else to turn to.

Katie: Can you just come over to my house?

[thecaptaincurfew-blog]

I believe it because it’s the truth of the matter. I didn’t sustain any injuries or accidents; I’m of sound mind on this so there goes your little theory. Hypocritical? Please. Just about everything you’ve said in this little chat has been fictitious. I haven’t told a single lie. If only you could say the same. You’re downright diabolic, Matlin, but I’m not easily swayed so you’ll have to try a little harder. That was a false pretense, hate to break it to you. Ha, there’s a laugh. It’s cute that you honestly believed that though, albeit slightly disconcerting as well. You fail to see logic or reason so of course you’d be apt to thinking so. I never once claimed to be a modest guy. I have my moments of humility but when I’m right, you can bet I’m shouting it from rooftops. These lies have their hooks in you so deeply that you can’t be saved, I’ve come to accept that fact. It’s a shame though. I really thought in time you’d be able to come around but clearly that hope is in vain. You’re getting progressively worse. I’m actually concerned about your well-being now. Nah, a small ibuprofen should do the trick just nicely. Little comments like that are why I say you’re mean to me. I don’t have anything to make amends for so I won’t waste the time or energy it would take to, as you see it anyway, set things right. You’ve got a superiority complex that just can’t be beat. I’ll bow out gracefully and have someone replace me. I’m sure you have people lined up, just waiting in the wings. You’re just picky is all. If you could treat me better, I’d jump at the chance for an upgrade in dynamics, certainly. I understand perfectly why you didn’t but that goes both ways. I’ve gone over this countless times over the years. I can see your perspective clear as day and I can only hope you can see mine as well. I didn’t give you the response you were looking for and I felt terrible for that. I didn’t feel deserving of your friendship anymore. We were amazing as friends. I don’t know what this is now but I’m deeming it a second chance. That makes me feel like an even bigger ass than before but I guess I deserved that.

It’s no loss to me, I promise. Overcrowding is just as good a reason as any to back out of this at all costs. I’m a man of many talents. Leaving people in awe just so happens to be one my finest skills. There’s no getting through to you. There isn’t a single trace of resentment, that much I can guarantee. Please, you’ll get over it. You have your minions to bolster your ego anyway so you’ll be just fine in the long run. By all means, become friends with a five year old. Aiden is the coolest one around. I’ve had these accolades for years now so too little too late. Old habits die hard. And for the record, the nickname stays. You really do have a warped sense of reality, you poor thing. Change is inevitable. Out with the old, in with the new, right?

[thesoccerstar]

Like you'd even know what the truth of the matter is, Pinocchio. I'll believe that when I receive a doctor's report confirming that there aren't any internal brain damages. You can just drop it by my class on Monday. I'm baffled and ever so slightly impressed by how you can be so painfully wrong this often. It's really a simple concept: you lie a lot, I'm the pristine picture of honesty, and you still lie a lot. I'm glad we settled that like responsible adults. I've already changed your mind; you just don't know it yet. I'm really not fond of you. That's my way of saying that the tradition's going to live on, by the way. I fail to see logic or reason? Go lie down, Elijah. You're obviously too delusional to function right now. Given the fact that you're rarely right, I can understand why you'd want to cherish those extraordinary moments when you are. You're one to talk. Tell me, do you even know how to be honest anymore? Maybe it's time we staged an intervention for you. Remind me to talk to your parents about this. I'm so flattered that you'd go as far to take medication in order keep talking to me. You're such a big baby. But in my defense, you started this, not me. Just so you know, I'd forgive you if you were to present me with a bouquet of purple lilacs. Out of the pure goodness of my heart, of course, not because of the flowers. I take pride in it, thank you. To be precise, I have twenty two improved versions of you. It's a tedious job to select one, though. Perhaps I'll just keep you around and make modifications as I see fit. And you're just annoying is all. Except I really don't know if I can treat you any better. I mean, it's you. I'd genuinely worry if this back and forth banter were to come to a halt. Frankly, I just figured that it freaked you out to the point where you couldn't stand to be my friend. Before I told you, a part of me was sensible enough to know that you wouldn't feel the same way. I'm not really sure what changed in those few moments when it actually happened. What I'm trying to say is that you're kind of an idiot and you didn't need to feel terrible. A second chance. If possible, this feels more impermanent than the last. That wasn't my intention, sorry. I just meant that I was irrationally hopeful. 

It's the only reason, and you know it. You neglected to mention your biggest talent. It's a little something known as modesty; you might've heard of it. I thought we already established that your efforts were in vain? This time around, I don't think that my minions will be of much help. I hope you're pleased with what you've done. In that case, you're out and Aiden's in. Besides, I only tolerated you for your mom's brownies. Are you presenting yourself with accolades now? How desperate. I hate to have this argument again, but what's wrong with Katie? It's sufficiently professional and pleasingly delicate at the same time. Not nearly as much as you. I'm not sure about that. While you can't conquer or avoid change in its entirety, a few bits and pieces are meant to stay the same and it will. Exhibit A: Us. In spite of everything. 

[thesoccerstar]

text ☆ imogen

Imogen: What are you even talking about? You're rambling and you never ramble, that's my job. And it's daytime? You never text me unless it's night and you're /bored/.

Imogen: You want to see me? Is this some kind of joke, Katie? What's really going on?

Katie: I don't know, I don't know, I don't know. I didn't dive into this with a predetermined outline of how things would pan out, and I've retained enough of my senses to conclude right now that this isn't going to end well. Just humor me, will you?

Katie: I can't be any plainer than this: I need to see you.

[thesoccerstar]

Facerange Message ✉ Katie Matlin

Adam: Are you serious? I mean, I can do all that, but, why the change of heart?

Katie: No particular reason as such. I figured I'd help you out. Now are you up for it or not?

[thesoccerstar]

text ☆ imogen

Katie: I realize that this is going to be unexpected, and if it were any other instance, I'd be second-guessing this severely. God, I don't even know what I'm trying to say here. I really don't.

Katie: Can I just see you, please?

[thecaptaincurfew-blog]

It’s a cheap last ditch effort at best and nothing more. Then I regret to inform you that you’ve successfully managed to have lost your touch over the years because your words are saturated in bias. I think we both know that’s not true. The truth sets me free, therefore I have no problem calling attention to it and on the same token, calling you out as well. It is innate, we can agree on that much. I’ll believe that when I see it. Until then, I’m going to continue being indifferent to all that you have to say. I’m not going to agree with you on this, not when you’re failing to see reason. A well-respected tradition for whom? Once again, this falls in your favor so naturally you don’t have any qualms against it—therein lays the problem. My word should count for a lot more seeing as though it’s the only thing here with actual merit and substance but that’s just me. Even with honesty staring you right in the face, you remain stuck in your ways and refuse to come around. It’s a real shame, Matlin. All you do is give me a headache. I’d hardly call it much of a challenge but let’s not mince words. I don’t owe you anything for this. How sweet. And what pray tell are the requirements to be said punching bag? I’d gladly pass along my title to someone else far more deserving if that’s the case. I am tolerable; you’re the one with the issue here, not me. Nah, that would just mean caving and letting you get your way. I’m plenty nice and I won’t stoop to giving into your demands to make you see that. They’re never out of reach. I sincerely hope you won’t be placing bets for that because I can tell you right now, that’s not happening. A simple text or email would have sufficed, just something to let me know you weren’t upset with me. We both should have said something. This isn’t a game of chess, it’s not about whose turn it is to make the next move. I’ll apologize until I’m blue in the face but in all honesty, I thought you didn’t want to be my friend anymore. I should have done more, I should have stepped up but after a while, the silence said more than any words could have and I just accepted things for what they were. Of course it matters. I let you down and I’ll be sorry about that.

How could I not? I’m glad the feeling is mutual. I don’t want any part in this and no one there would want me anyway so it works out perfectly. Please, I’d rest easy every night no matter how hostile the mob gets. I don’t know how much more plainly I can say it for you to just accept the truth. You want to buy into the notion that I’m somehow upset by this. I beg to differ with you on that one. You won’t get your fifteen minutes of fame or bragging rights over me because that’s just not possible. Hey, he’s the miniature version of me, albeit much cuter but still. He’d get through it. I earned it fair and square. Very perceptive, Kat. Pity, oh well; such is life. I don’t know why you’re so adamant about abusing me in the first place. If you want to hit something, refer back to your days in martial arts.

[thesoccerstar]

If you genuinely believe that I'm about to take your word on this front, you must've taken a nasty tumble down several flights of stairs. I trust it hurt just enough to set you straight? It's probably a wee bit hypocritical of you to call me out on my supposed lies. Note how I said supposed. So you admit that you've been lying all along. The beauty of my persuasion tactics is that it's so subtle that it happens without your knowledge. On the contrary, I was under the impression that it was a well-respected tradition for the both of us. I know that deep, deep down you're very fond of our little ritual. Merit and substance? You're blinded by your own convictions. It might also be worth mentioning that you're obnoxiously full of yourself. That was some sort of weak substitute which was further diluted with lies; there wasn't a shred of honesty in there. Please tell me that it's the kind of headache that's impossible to cure. Nothing you say is going to convince me that I don't challenge you, so just save your breath and start thinking of ways to make it up to me. It's a long list, but I can give you the abridged version: witty, charming, reliable, and of course, having the good sense to worship me without any external motivation is always a plus. Come to think of it, I've been too lenient with you; maybe you should retire. I can't be the only person who finds you insufferable, so I seriously doubt that's the prevailing opinion. Admit it, you just don't want me to treat you any differently than I do right now. Even if it meant that you'd be proving me wrong? It'll happen, I know it. And what if you'd ignored me? You have to understand why I didn't try. Any attempt I made to reach out to you would've just made me look helpless. But everyone's subconsciously thinking, "I've played my piece so now I wait." Or have you never thought that? Initially, I didn't, but then I tried to contemplate the alternative and I couldn't stomach it. And I should've just kept things to myself, so I suppose we both share blame. The way I see it, something bad was bound to happen. We had too good a run when we were friends. You let me down because I had unrealistic expectations. I can't blame you for that. 

I wouldn't mind having you there, but there are far too many people and it's starting to get suffocating. You understand. That's genuinely most imprudent thing I've ever heard you say and that's saying something. Maybe you should just try saying the actual truth every once in a while. You're upset. I can sense it in your words. There you go, underestimating my abilities yet again. Some friend you are, really. He's also sweeter and more well-behaved than you are. I think I befriended the wrong Goldsworthy. There's no way you can earn any rewards until you redeem yourself. I considered not pointing this out, but it just hit me that you haven't called me that in a very long time. For the record, I'm still not fond of it. There's no need to act like it doesn't bother you. Just let it all out. Excuse me for valuing an age-old tradition. 

[thesoccerstar]

Facerange Message ✉ Katie Matlin

Adam: That'd be the one.

Adam: You'd get paid weekly. Just get paid to be seen with me, and hangout with me and stuff. We go out to lunch? You get paid. You kiss me in the halls where people can see? You get paid (a little bit extra for that, of course.) But, you get the point.

Katie: Um, well, I'll consider doing it on three conditions: a) No one can know about this, b) You can't tell people that we went any further than kissing no matter what, and c) /No one/ can know about this. Can you do that?