The Sum of Seconds

The future is the sum of seconds. Here's how I hoped mine would add up.

[thatkindofwoman]

I’m going to love myself this winter.  I’m going to charm myself. I’m going to treat her like I would treat someone who I want. Someone I need. Someone I want to get to know. Someone that I couldn’t stand not to know. 

I will know what she loves. What makes her laugh. What makes her cry.  I will be proud of her. I will cheer her on. I will be tough on her when she needs it. I will love her flaws, and hope that she overcomes them. I will support her through that struggle. I will love her through all struggles. I will love what she is capable of. I will love the people who love her. I will appreciate them loving her like I do. I will be patient, and appreciate their patience. 

I want to spend the nights appreciating the grace of her hands, and the trim lines of her ankles. I want to drink wine with her, and enjoy her favorite things. I want to make new memories with her, loving her. I will challenge her understanding of the world. I will help her become a better storyteller. We together, will tell a story that must be told. 

I will discover a new world, loving her. I will discover a new way to love. I will discover a new way to live. Loving her. I’ve been with her for nearly 30 years, and I’ve finally found her, seen her fear, her possibility. Seen all the love she can give to me, loving me. She’s been beside me this whole time, and I had no idea that I could love her as much as I do. 

I will love her. I must love her. I can love her.  I will love her like she’s never been loved before. 

[nondualreality]

“My life used to be full of everything. Now if you aren’t with me I haven’t a thing in the world.”

— Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms

[thatkindofwoman]

“My heart is full of February longings,”

— Bing Hua, from Roses by the Stream; Poems; “February Roses,” (via violentwavesofemotion)

[violentwavesofemotion-deactivat]

“I know your strength of spirit. I want you to be with me,”

— Dacia Maraini, from “Only Prostitutes Marry in May,” wr. c. August 1994

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

“There’s a difference between somebody who wants you and somebody who would do anything to keep you. Remember that.”

— Unknown

[thesumofseconds]

relevant. thank you.

[thatkindofwoman]

“I can’t do this, I can’t just be a wife. I don’t understand how anyone does it—there is literally nothing to do but wait. Wait for a man to come home and love you.”

— Paula Hawkins, The Girl on the Train 

[thesumofseconds]

Damn. Oof.

[blossomfully]

Before you kiss someone for the first time, just wait. Take a second to look at them. They are so new, so unfamiliar. Right now you don’t know how they taste, how their hands will press against your skin, how they’ll breathe. You won’t see them like this again. Look at them wanting - the apprehension in their eyes. They don’t know either. In their minds you are uncharted territory. Isn’t that special? Keep it. That’s how you’ll never lose them. Every so often afterwards look at them through these eyes. Don’t lose that wonder. Don’t lose the spark.

S.Z. // Excerpt from a book I’ll never write, #197  (via thatkindofwoman)

[scorpy]

[thatkindofwoman]

What should I be drinking this weekend?

Home made sangria. Tomorrow go grab some blueberries, raspberries, strawberries and some navel oranges. Grab a big bottle of red, and a blush. Seltzer water, honey. GO CRAZY.  Let your lips get stained and wear a dress that’s been waiting for warmer weather!

Or, buy some Hendrick’s Gin and infuse it with lavender, add champagne. Mix in your favorite tonic. Wear a lot of bracelets, so they jingle everytime you talk. 

Home made sun tea and Bulleit Rye Whiskey, make your own lemon simple syrup. Tell a couple horrible jokes to close friends and laugh. Laugh about everything. 

[thesumofseconds]

This woman needs to run my life. 

[bled]

[thesumofseconds]

Awwwwwwh

[thenewmans]

“Some combination of lust and respect and patience. And determination.”

- Paul Newman, when asked in a 1998 interview about how he and Joanne Woodward had maintained a successful marriage. 

[summers-in-hollywood]

[yepitsmadshep]

“the billie holiday record I played that night might as well have Madison written all over it.” 

[whitepaperquotes]

‘I Suppose Forver Is Over’

It was a Saturday night

under a blanket of little lights

when you pulled me in

and told me

we were meant to be.

Now,

I’m not sure of what

forever feels like,

but if there is such a thing,

I was supposed to live in it

with you.

This was supposed to work.

You said I was great

and that this was something great,

and it was supposed to work.

We were supposed to have years

of lazy Sundays,

lying in bed watching the end

of a horror movie from the

night before,

that you turned off

because you said you were tired,

but I knew you were

just scared.

And you would feed me Skittles

and I would catch the spiders you hated

and we would close the curtains

and pretend the world outside

didn’t exist.

This was supposed to work.

But then I realised

you’d been sharing

our memories

with somebody else,

and forever

didn’t seem as long as I’d hoped.

Written/submitted by your-daisyfreshgirl

… Come talk to me :)

[thesumofseconds]

my heart. you knew. oh, you knew, for so, so long. 

[yepitsmadshep]

In December the sun was giving me kisses. 

[primarity]

Found Here

[weltenwellen]

You attract the right things when you have a sense of who you are.

Amy Poehler (via briqou)

[books-n-quotes]

Sometimes you are going to miss a person who was an almost to you. And feel sad because there is no name for that feeling. You just feel it in a way that makes you tired to your very bones.

Nikita Gill, Almost Feelings (via books-n-quotes)