Barmaid in England and the Gourmet Governor

Brought to you by The Three Stags, Kennington

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Oh I Wish It Could Be Xmas EVERY Day

I caught the Guv' in a good mood this week: "We're fully booked for Xmas lunches in the upstairs dining room". Do we hear the cash till ringing?

The downstairs bar is heaving most nights with appreciative diners and happy revellers sipping our mulled wine. Do we hear the cash till ringing?

Our Facebook page is flowing with comments about our decor and festive windows...... Do we hear the cash till ringing?

Of course we hear the electronic bleep of the cash till at this time of year. Xmas comes but once a year and blimey doesn't everyone make sure they have a good time? No expense spared! especially if the office is paying!

We're happy to see so many happy smiling faces that we wish it could be xmas every day.

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All I Want For Xmas Is YOU!

Tis the season to be Merry! (and we have a superb selection of wines for you to get merry on) Tis the season to feast! .... and we don't advocate stuffing yourselves  so early on  in December with twiglets/ quality street or supermarket mince pies. Instead be discerning. Save the truly magnificient meal of the season for Xmas day and in the meantime dine on something prepared with care. Here at the Stags in the lead up to Xmas - we have on our regular evening menu: seasonal treats such as  Cornish salmon (homecured for 48hours), venison and the above: which is confit of duck w/ sauteed potatoes, french beans and raspberry sauce. Look at the photo: it begs to be eaten!! Go on treat yourself and another person - you don't want to dine alone - that's selfish.

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TALES FROM THE FACTORY FLOOR

Our Xmas decorations have gone up in the pub.

...... Meet Rioja Rose our newest recruit. Rioja is doing seasonal work before starting uni - she's resitting her A-levels as she failed them for the eighth time: well, she does listen to One Direction instead of revising. We like having her in the pub as she is so ...... simple. Why did her parents name her 'Rioja'? because when they met in 1995 in Spain, they fell in love with the region and over their first bottle of good red plonk.

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Rambusters & Silence of the Lambs

Ram-alama-dingdong! we've done it again! The Stags have purchased a goat, from Surrey Docks Farm, that will go to slaughter and end up (after careful preparation) on our diners plates!

The same fate awaits one their  lambs . We say:  'Don't look upon it's beauty - look upon it as an amazingly good roast!! '.

This is local produce at its best. Pay a visit to The Stags to have a sample. 'Sounds 'cruel but the taste is sublime.

Surrey Docks Farm, Rotherhithe London: A hidden gem on the river Thames. A livestock / veg and fruit farm. Free entry. Farm shop onsite.

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Foodie Fashion

Rapeseed Oil is the new 'oil' on the block and in the supermarkets. Low in fats, good for heart health and British.  Bottles of cold pressed are costly: £4.00 upwards.

Most bottles come laden with info detailing Rapeseeds goodness in order to justify the hefty pricetag. However, if you look in the same section in the aisle at supermarkets you will discover  a brand called "Crisp & Dry" which has long been associated with frying fatty foods - mainly chips. Look closely and it clearly states: 100% Rapeseed Oil. It's not cold pressed - it is British and it's half the price as the posh labelled bottles. "Crisp & Dry" is perfect for regular cooking.

At The Three Stags we notice things like this.

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Great Drinkers of Our Time

All the best villains are called Ronnie:  Ronnie Knight, Ronnie Biggs, Ronnie Corbett (he murdered a few jokes in his time) Ronnie Kray, Ronnie Mitchell and we are lucky enough to have drinking in our pub on a regular basis: Ronnie “Lambeth” .  “I don’t do surname’s Tess - you don’t need to know”. Ron is an elderly well turned out  character with plenty of stories about his working life in 70’s Soho when the area was still nice and sleazy. He talks with a Sarf of the river vernacular common amongst men of his age who’ve “dun-a-bit O’ this n’ that”. “Tess - you’da luvved a club in Sew-Hoe called ‘The London Cry’ - everyone went in. I used to knock off the woman who ran it. Gorgeous sort she was. I met ‘er yearz later in Self-ridges when I was wiv’ the missus. She said to me “I ain’t seen you in yearz” and to me wife she said “ E’ were me best customer” and gave me a wink. Me wife turned to me n said ‘I ‘ope she meant cash n nuffin’  else’. I nearly got a clout!” Ronnie regales me with all his stories about the people he knew who were “up to no good the lot of ‘em’. Hard men who ‘ad money and plenty of chat….like The Knibbler.. He woz called that on account of ‘im nibbling for a few bob. Some great feeves  and conmen in them dayz. All gone nah.Drugs has ruined London. That’s where the money is. No more commercial  robberies –  it’s all online now. Everyone’s gone……”

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Message In a Bottle

I made some Rosehip vinegar for the pub. Rosehip's are floral and achingly fashionable as well as containing huge amounts of Vitamin C and antioxidants. This will ward off winter colds. We use the vinegar to dress our Winter salads. What's a 'Winter Salad'? a seasonal leaf gathering! comprising of mizuna/mibuna/wild rocket/frizzee and oriental mustard greens. This little lot is warming and spicy (rather like me). I've been feeding the Guv' on this to keep him active (he's over 80yrs of age) and healthy. He looks and feels good on it.

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Trucklements?

That's what we excel at, here in the pub. No meal is complete without something to dollop onto your plate whether it's mustard, ketchup, chutney or a slither of jelly with  cheese: it's all a fine accompaniment.

Our basic standards are made by Heinz - the more intricate delicacy's are made by me. I recently made a 'pear, date & ale' chutney. Using those three ingredients, adding onions with some herbs, sugar and a touch of vinegar - I let it all reduce down into a sticky mass: roughly about 6hours!

The pears retained their shape whilst the dates dissolved into a thick consistency and provided much of the sweetness. The end result was all I could hope for:  a not so sweet, flavoursome chutney that would do any meat or cheese dish proud!

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WHAT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER WHEN YOU ARE IN A BAD MOOD?

if I cook something.

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Arise 'Quince of Islington'

It's amazing what you learn whilst out shopping. I popped down to Frieghtliners Farm in Islington to pick up some fresh produce straight from the plot. I was taken around by Jane, one of the growers, and she asked if I was interested in any of the veg that had just been harvested. I took a look into the box she ponted at and saw some white tennisball type specimens.

'Am I right in thinking these are aubergines?' I asked. 'Yeah' replied Jane,'They look like big eggs don't they? That's why Americans call aubergines - eggplants'. I didn't know that. It never occured to me to question why. Now I know.

As Jane took me around the various veg plots we chatted about the current 'chutney' season. Most veg growers will be immersed in doing what we all do about this time of year: chutney making. It's a great way of using up any surplus fruit or veg. Jane and I shared tips on how to use up quince.

The quince tree produces a downy fruit that is a cross between a pear and an apple. It makes a marvellous jelly, most famously used as an accompanyment to cheese.

Jane made a quince compote type jam by boiling the fruit with lemon, sugar and ginger. The result was a beautiful crimson set. The flavour was sharp, sweet and tasted like...... a cross between an apple and a pear.

The above photo is of a very proud jane holding aloft her creation. which is available to buy from the farm cafe. Having tasted it - Im now unsure as to whether to make a jelly or a jam...... what do you think? leave me a comment!

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An Apple A Day

It's the English Apple Season: there's been a fair few fayre's in honour of our wonderful seasonal fruit. Roots and Shoots, Lambeth / Surrey Docks Farm, Rotherhithe / Spitalfields City Farm, Spitalfields all held festivals showcasing all the different varieties of apple available to us.

Plenty of entertainment was provided in the traditional form of Morris Dancing and live celtic music. Demo's on apple pressing, cider making and cooking with apples (chutney/ pies )were held.

The above is a 'medlar' - its a type of apple that's fallen out of fashion. Many decades ago it was harvested and made into a "super vitamin c" charged jelly. This xmas we're bringing it back for our diners to sample and enjoy.

We're fortunate to be surrounded by residential houses with mature apple trees. We're the lucky  recipients of their windfalls - no 'scrumping' for us. There's plenty of crumble on our menu and I've been making apple chutney, I just wish I was able to make cider. Cider would make us all feel Rosie. And don't ask 'Who's Rosie?'. The sweet dessert apples have been making an appearance on our cheeseboard.

This is seasonal eating at it's most scrumptious. All Hail The Apple! In the bible it's depicted as the 'forbidden fruit' - is that because if left to ferment it turns to alcohol? Also, in Pagan folklore if a woman peels an apple leaving the skin whole and throws it over her shoulder - the shape of the apple skin will reveal the first letter of her future husbands name. In children's books apples are always presented to innocents laced with poison. Apples are traditionally the first fruit that a kid gets weaned on.

Let the apple works it's magic on you. Take a bite on one here at The Stags.

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Barmaid & The Guv' Do Shakespeare

We both had a bit of culture: we saw  Macbeth @ The Globe Theatre.

It was a rip-rousing performance, full of drama and comedy. That Bill Shakespeare knew how to put on a good play. 

The following is from Act 2, Scene 3 and I like it because of it's reference to and accuracy about the perils of boozing.....

“What three things does drink especially provoke?”

“Marry, sir, nose-painting, sleep, and urine. Lechery, sir, it provokes and unprovokes. It provokes the desire, but it takes away the performance. Therefore, much drink may be said to be an equivocator with lechery. It makes him, and it mars him; it sets him on, and it takes him off; it persuades him, and disheartens him; makes him stand to and not stand to; in conclusion, equivocates him in a sleep, and, giving him the lie, leaves him.”

In modern day language this translates as:  Drinking turns your nose red, it puts you to sleep and it makes you pee.  It turns you into an old lech. Too much drink gives you the horn but you can’t actually have it off. It gives you an erection then you lose it.  To conclude, it makes you pass out with a boner and needing to pee.

I know a number of male customers that would agree with Bill on that point.

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Honeylingus!!!!!

It was a hive of activity on our rooftop when our two honey monsters: Luke and Maddie arrived to harvest the nectar. First they gently smoked the bee's to make them docile - at the end of the day Luke and Maddie are nicking their food! it's only natural for them to attack.

After each comb was collected.......

Each cell on the comb had to be uncapped to extract the honey. (Oh, those clever bee's!) The utensil to do this was like a fierce version of an afro comb. (See above photo). The cap is wax and chewable: honey flavoured of course.

This is natural wax - I'm going to teach myself how to make candles as I don't require furniture polish (I don't live in Downton Abbey). I've been reliably informed (by a chemist) that wax can be used cosmetically. I rubbed a little on my lips (MY MOUTH!!!!! filthy minded reader) and found it to be very effective.

The honey being spun. The waft in the air was sublime. It had us buzzin!

The sterilised jars were placed directly beneath the tap of the drum and we poured the nectar straight into each. We didn't filter the honey as all keepers do. Why take away the goodness? every drop of the honey is medicinal. This is Lambeth Realness - this is how we walk! "Oi!". The photo above is the finished product. It looks like a jar of marmalade.

One of the combs had a  pollen stash. I dug it out and gave it to the guv' as he had a stinking cold. it tasted pleasant with a slight tang rather like (but not!) a dried raspberry.  Dried bee pollen costs a fortune in Planet "Overly Expensive" Organic / Holland & Barrett / Wholefoods. So it was logical that we'd keep it.

We filled about 50 jars with our elixir: LOADSA HONEY!! The whole evening of harvesting was oozing with happiness and we dipped our spoons many  times into the vat. What did it taste of? floral and nutty. Fuck knows where those bee's went foraging. What they've created though is a thoroughly orgasmic tasting honey. It was an aural delight.

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Phew! What a Scorcher!

Spitalfields City Farm held London's first ever chilli festival. Over 3,000 people hot-footed it down to celebrate the fiery little capiscum. The above photo is of me and my volunteer Jo-anne making "green tomato & mild chilli salsa' which we handed out as a free sample: 'coz that's how we roll at the farm'.

Entertainment was provided by superb musicians playing 50's inspired music. I am 50 and I can vouch that I've never met these guys before or ever told them what sort of sounds I like.

Lots of big name traders came down to sell their unique products. Sales on the day were exceptionally good - it appears that Londoners love a tongue tingling sauce.  I tried  "Ghost Pepper Spray" by Tom & Olly, I dipped a piece of cracker into the sample sauce and whilst I enjoyed the flavour - I don't relish having my mouth numbed! However, there were plenty of stalls selling soothing milk drinks to take the heat down: milk being the antidote to fire.

By the end of the day as the sun began to set and I'd tired of hearing about the 'dorset naga chilli' being the most flammable nugget that a person can digest and just when i thought I'd seen and tasted every searingly hot product  on offer (chilli chocolate / chilli icecream / chilli sauce / chilli bread / chilli nuts etc)   ...... someone came over  and handed me a 'vodka chilli shot' which I turned down as by this point I'd had ENOUGH!! I wanted to dunk my tongue into a huge jug of iced water.

A big thank you to Rossana Leal & Craig Cooper, the organisers, for a fantastic flaming hot day (and the sun did shine as well!).

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Tim's Stringy Fetish

Green Beans Ahoy!! Tim, at the three stags, holding aloft the last of this years crop of green beans. This little bundle came from  one of our growers in Stepney. Green beans have a tendency to be 'stringy' - however, because of the spanking freshness of our beans this won't happen. Tim was salivating at the thought of sinking his teeth into the cooked bean. "Will it be on a main or side dish?" he asked eagerly. "I haven't decided!" I replied tersely. "I may whip it into a chutney!".

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Barmaid at Capel Manor 'Aggrocultural' Fayre

Here at the Stags we buy in small batches of seasonal veg from Spitalfields City Farm. I'm proud to be a Spitalfields Farmer. For the past 5years this project has brought me enormous health benefits and laughter. I've met many people and made many friends here. Every year the farm competes with all the other urban farm's for 'Best in Show' with the animals and produce.

It's a fair fight that see's us winning a few awards. We'd win alot more if I was allowed to do a bit of bribery......

All the young volunteers come along and are judged on their knowledge of the animals they tend to and 'handling'. The above pic is of Jake with his goose - the goose was more attractive than Jake that's why he's not in shot.

The farm Donkey's: Bayleaf & Derek both brayed loudly throughout the day giving them first prize in  the 'who had the biggest gob' category.

Milo, Michelle and Me inside the marquee where all the farms exhibited their seasonal produce. All displays were incredible. Below was the overall winner: Frieghtliners Farm......

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The Incredible Green Fingered Gifted Grower

Ladies and Gentlemen meet Paul Cooper of L'arche Lambeth. Paul is the head gardener of this residential home for people with learning disabilities. The house is a grand gothic lodge with a sizeable garden which is tended lovingly by Paul with volunteers. Paul is a natural and prolific grower. His laissez faire attitude towards his plants borders on brilliance. He only has to poke a seed in the earth and it sprouts abundantly. He does nothing to them except water and the occasional pruning. As he told me "....I don't have that much  time to spend in the garden....". Part of Paul's work is to oversee the residents creativity. He has them making willow wreaths, dried flower arrangements, paper books with pressed flowers, lavender bags - all using produce from the garden.

His garden is teeming with food: beans, fruit, chard, squashes  - you name the vegetable and he's got it by the tonnage! I love visiting this project: there is a serenity and beauty about the garden which no-one could fail to notice. The residents sell their work and produce - you only have to ring to make an appointment!

I LOVE L"ARCHE!!!!

Below is a picture of The Three Stags Horse n' Cart

My bounty from Paul's Garden!!!