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ex0skeletal

Zodiac Angels by Peter Mohrbacher

1. Hanael, Angel of Capricorn:

2. Advachiel, Angel of Sagittarius:

3. Ambriel, Angel of Gemini:

4. Muriel, Angel of Cancer:

5. Verchiel, Angel of Leo:

6. Hamaliel, Angel of Virgo:

7. Zuriel, Angel of Libra:

8. Barbiel, Angel of Scorpio:

9. Cambiel, Angel of Aquarius:

10. Barchiel, Angel of Pisces:

11. Malahidael, Angel of Aries:

12. Asmodel, Angel of Taurus:

tuffin-tuffmuffin

My Life As A DM #3

How to derail your own campaign with a single item.

themothyards

TYPE: Ghost Shell Recording

DESCRIPTION: Conversation

LOCATION: The Tower, The Last City

//AUDIO UNAVAILABLE//

//TRANSCRIPT FOLLOWS//

[Throat clearing]

[Commander Zavala] Thank you for joining me. As we are all aware, this September marks the anniversary of the Red War. Reconstruction is proceeding quickly, but the fact remains that the City - and those who reside in it - will take a very long time to heal. And that is why I’ve called you here: to discuss -

[Cayde-6] Yeah, yeah, we get it. You want to have a Zavala parade.

[Commander Zavala] I…what? No, I don’t want to have a Zavala parade.

[Cayde-6] A biiiiig parade where everyone dresses up as you and sings songs about our blue savior.

[Commander Zavala] Cayde, I am neither our savior, nor am I aware of any songs about me.

[Cayde-6] Oh? You should stop by the Crucible sometime.

[Ikora Rey] You’re sure a parade is appropriate, given the circumstances of the last?

[Commander Zavala] I’ve said nothing about a parade.

[Cayde-6] How about a Cayde Parade? It sounds better. Plus, I’d make a better balloon. It’s the horn, you know? A Zavala balloon would just look like a giant blueberry. Also - and I hate to say this - I think I’m more popular.

[Heavy sigh]

[Commander Zavala] I’ve called you here to discuss what shape our commemoration should take. So far, Cayde has suggested a parade. Anyone else?

[Lord Shaxx] A month-long tournament, the likes of which the Crucible has never seen. We shall pull from the ranks of our strongest Guardians, and in the end, the victor -

[Cayde-6] Will get a parade! I love it.

[Ikora Rey] On second thought, perhaps a parade isn’t such a bad idea. It shows…defiance. Tenacity. There is power to be found in -

[Cayde-6] Power to be found in cycles, yeah, yeah, we know. Ok, get this: how about a fair? With rides, and games, and - oh! We can get Amanda to rig up one of those really long slides, straight from the top of the tower all the way down to the streets.

[Lord Shaxx] A foolish idea. With those assets, my Redjacks could clear more areas. Prepare more combat zones. We would be sharper for it, more prepared for the next attack.

[Cayde-6] Or, we could have a fair AND a parade.

[Commander Zavala] Cayde, please.

[Cayde-6] Okay, okay.

[Silence]

[Cayde-6] I think we should have a Cayde balloon and a Ralph balloon. Oh, and maybe an Eris balloon. I know she’s not here, but she’ll hate it anyway. Wherever she is.

[Ikora Rey] There, there. I’m sure she misses you too.

[Cayde-6] Very funny.

[Ikora Rey] Yes, I thought so.

[Lord Shaxx] If nothing of worth remains to be discussed, I have Crucible matches to oversee.

[Cayde-6] And I’ve got a balloon to design! Well, two. Ikora, I’ll leave Eris to you. Let’s go, Ralph.

[Silence]

[Commander Zavala] This has been a tremendous waste of time.

[Ikora Rey] He has a point, as he so rarely does: I don’t think anyone in the City is interested in solemnity and reflection. We’ve had a year of that. Let’s celebrate our triumphs while we can.

[Commander Zavala] A fair, then? With a slide? Truly?

[Ikora Rey] Call it a month of celebration. Festivals are always welcome - and I’m sure someone will make those fried cakes you like so much.

[Commander Zavala] We can only hope.

[Ikora Rey] And hope we shall.

[Commander Zavala] For the record, I have no desire to become a balloon.

[Ikora Rey] Good, as I’m afraid Cayde was right about that as well - I don’t think you’d make a very good one.

[Commander Zavala] Thank you, Ikora.

[Ikora Rey] You’re very welcome.

yourplayersaidwhat

Context: I once played a short session with a dm who was, (to put it lightly) uncomfortably intense. While we played one of the other players noticed a strange scar on his palm, and he muttered “it’s from the game” but wouldn’t go into it any further. Eventually after much poking and some ungodly bottom shelf whiskey he told us the following, which i honestly believe is true and always will.

DM: about 10 years ago (early 2000’s) I was in playing in a bunch of campaigns at the same time, and my girlfriend at the time found a beautiful glass d20, and gave it to me for our anniversary. This d20 was so lucky for me that people thought it was weighted, but when they rolled it it behaved just like any other d20 would.

Time passed and a few months later we broke up and it was as if the luck was sucked right out of it. Crit fails upon crit fails and I lost two characters to it. I was furious, and when I lost my character in my main campaign to a crit fail I couldn’t take it anymore. I slammed the die down so hard that it shattered and cut my hand, and I slid all my other dice over to it and yelled “let this be a goddamn lesson to all of you!” And to this day I’ve never had a long run of bad luck again.

maxdmgsd

Half-orc fighter: are these windows big enough for someone to jump through?

DM: the windows aren’t open.

Half-orc fighter: that’s not what I asked.

constantlyonfirerpgideas

If it ain’t me

5theditionhomebrewing-deactivat

First set of constructs. Whole lot of stuff being made about them right now. Going to take some time to get done. I’ll work on fixing up some of the wording and presentation later. Just wanted to get these out after so long. PDF

yourplayersaidwhat

“You know, when I put this adventure in a forest I didn’t expect to have to role play a TREE, but here we are”

— The DM

spaceyjules-deactivated20180305

If you call pedophilia a kink please unfollow me and never talk to me again

spaceyjules-deactivated20180305

Isn’t it disgusting that 23 people just unfollowed me

clarknokent

Unfollow me too

gothhabiba

this goes double if you call paedophilia a disability. unfollow me twice

closet-keys

and if you call pedophilia an “orientation” or in any way compare it to being LGBP+ you can unfollow, delete your blog, and set yourself on fire.

peachypastel

I just lost 50 followers.. bye

katiemcgrxth

clearing out the trash

bway-grimes

GO ON AND S M A S H THAT UNFOLLOW BUTTON

moonedknights

BUHBYE U McNASTIES

bogleech

I’ve seen this circulating forever and genuinely thought “no way do I have any of them following me” until this week when it turned out I had all these fuckin “MAP” (pedophile) followers sad to find out I’m an “anti” (normal person) Please leave and also please get guinea worm.

flerpdederp

GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY BLOG

bunchofdoodlesinspace

I reblogged something similar to this a while ago but again:

if you support pedophilia,

kindly get the fuck off of my blog.

Thanks.

princet-ofthe-rivers

I reblog these regularly.

STAY OFF MY BLOOOOOOG

littlebabiebear

Shoo fly, don’t bother me👋🏾

fragilelikeabomb0106

Pedophilia is not welcome in the LGBTQ+ community nor are MAPs or pedophilia apologizers welcome on any of my blogs. If you support pedophilia, unfollow me. My blog is a safe space but I will not tolerate the sexualization of children.

antoninaagg-deactivated20200410

Go on and smash that unfollow button. You’re not welcome here.

probablybadrpgideas

Play an Ogre Paladin and have this play every time he walks into a room

itsalwayssunnyinhiraeth

filibusterfrog

7th lv spell scars, dms please abuse your power

(Cantrip scars)

(1st level spell scars)

(2nd level spell scars)

(3rd level spell scars)

(4th level spell scars)

(5th level spell scars)

(6th level spell scars)

yourplayersaidwhat

(Context : My friend and I are both bards in our party. I have a lute and he has a flute. We are in an inn and we want to play a song to see if we can get a free room.)

Me: What song should we play?

Other Bard: Oasis - Wonderwall

Dm : Roll for performance

(My friend proceeds to roll a nat 20 while I roll a 2)

DM: You both begin to play. The flute emits a harmonious blend of notes, with flawless finger movements. This is by far the most beautiful version of Wonderwall ever played. DM(to me) :Meanwhile, you are in the back just plucking miscellaneous strings on the lute. The patrons in the bar aren’t even sure if you are with the flute player.)

yourplayersaidwhat

Rogue, getting angry very quickly: “Wow, it’s almost like I suggested that before, but no one listened until someone else said it.” Cleric, trying to calm her: “Look-” Rogue: “Or, before, when we were making camp, if you had listened to what I said about the fire, we wouldn’t have had that issue either!” DM: Of course, but why would anyone listen to a dirty drow? Rogue (OOC): Ouch. DM: Or at least that’s why the NPCs ignore you. I’m not sure what excuse your party has. Party: *Looks around sheepishly* Rogue: You’re all pricks.