Wholehurtedly

Where love and pain collides

[theunwantedman]

Acts of service…

The love language that I didn’t know I always show to people I love. A great discovery to know more about myself. Doing this makes my heart happy and satisfied.

But,

Physical touch…

Will always be my assurance to know that I’m loved. And this can soothe my anxious heart.

Feb 26 ‘26

[theunwantedman]

I’m just thankful that God sent me trusted friends that will help me to cling on during times of adversity.

Before I ask, God already knows what I need. Right timing.

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[theunwantedman]

I thought I was living. But I was wrong. I am patching this void in my heart by chasing.

But I am really trying to survive with this running mind and a lifeless body. It’s always raining. It’s always sad.

Can I call you, my one true friend? and have a small conversation with a cup of coffee?

Jan 23 ‘26

[thepersonalquotes]

[theunwantedman]

Another sleepless and endless night.

Dec 2 ‘25

[theunwantedman]

It’s World Mental Health Day!

Thank you tumblr for being my journal therapy i never thought I needed.

My mental head space when I’m down.

Oct 10 ‘25

[theunwantedman]

How can you be therapeutic to my pain:

Listen without judgement

Sat with me in pain instead of trying it to fix

Let me talk about her, not to hold onto her, but to let her go in pieces

Ask me how I was— and meant it

Help me feel like my sadness is safe with you

Remind me I wasn’t broken just because I still loved her who hurt me

Just present. Gentle when I am raw. No sarcasm and coldness.

June 22 ‘25

[theunwantedman]

Loving you in silence can still create a different kind of noise.

June 20 ‘25

[quantum-bliss]

Sometimes we think we miss the relationship, but really we just miss the person we were before the relationship.

[theunwantedman]

I cried because I missed you so.

Hate this feeling. Screaming from the inside. Until when? Until when my dear?

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May 27 ‘25

[theunwantedman]

I cried. And i hate u. thank you for letting me do it.

Those memories. Those pictures. Forgotten by time.

Let me float in the oblivion. And stay there forever for the both of us.

For. The. Both. Of. Us.

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Apr 5 ‘25

[thoughtkick]

“There’s nothing like deep breaths after laughing that hard. Nothing in the world like a sore stomach for the right reasons.”

— Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

[theunwantedman]

Core memories unlocked this year. Yeeeyyyy! 🙌

[theunwantedman]

A letter to my ghost lover

Hey! It’s been a while. How are you? I just wanted you to know that I still care for you. I pray for you always that hopefully everything went well for you. Your happiness. Your freedom. Your personal goals. Your future man.

But I really do want you to be the best and excel in everything that you do. My love for you will never pass away. I know a lot of people love you so much. You are blessed and a valuable rare gem. Continue to be so caring and thoughtful like how you always did before. Don’t let the situation/people control you from what you want to do. Don’t be like me. Love yourself more.

As long as I know that you’re safe and your man doesn’t burdens you like I do. I’m already okay with that. Because you deserve the best. The one who will stood for you. The one who will fight for you. Because you are you. A sunflower in the oasis. Where the sun sets and shines upon you everyday.

Don’t stop even if everything around you feels like stopping or freezing. Even it feels like they are against you. Go always against the current. Your will and passion will pierce you through the wind. Dreams will be your guidance. And finding the light in the darkest night will always be found inside your heart. In your innermost desires.

I just want to say how happy and blessed I am to met you. Even just for a moment. A moment that lasts a lifetime. A moment that I will treasure everyday and say that “Someone loved me at my worst and best moments” and I’m proud of that. You make me see myself worthy of your love and worthy to be loved.

You make me the happiest man in the darkest times during the pandemic.

That maybe selfish to hear. But that’s the reality and pure honesty I can say with everything that’s going on.

I’ll always stay authentic and true to you.

And with that, I hope this letter may find you someday.

And when that someday happens, remember that I am smiling always for you from afar.

My sunflower. My ghost lover.

Dec 24 ‘24

[theunwantedman]

No one can ever see my biggest smile ever again.

Only one person can bring it back to me.

Only one. You know who you are.

So for now, sit with me in sadness. Feel the excruciating pain you have caused me. All those people I thought who really love me, brought me the same intense pain.

I will rather stay single forever than marrying the wrong one which my heart knows who am I loyal to.

Scared for the future. But more scared that there will be no more chances for you to see me smile again.

And let’s just be okay with that. We’ll die anyway.

Tired of doing something. Doing everything in vain.

Let me die peacefully knowing that I will either marry her or no woman at all.

Dec 24 ‘24

[theunwantedman]

Deep sorrow on Christmas. A different kind of season.

Never I had experience this kind of something unusual. But this is the purest, honest and authentic part of me. I’d rather deal with my truest feelings than fake smiles and endless giving in vain. Christmas should be real. Because God is real. Stop making the house filled with colorful lights and decorations when it is cracking and burning inside. It will go down eventually. Focus on repairing the leaks and cracks. Building it to be stronger not to be beautiful. The warmth of the house can be found in the innermost part of it. You can cover or hide the ugly parts of it but it will be noticeable.

I cannot go party and celebrate with someone who is experiencing pain and hurt. I’d rather go grieve with him/her. Empathy is a form of love which is the true essence of the season. No one is left behind.

The warm fuzzy feeling we all chasing in this cold hard winter.

Dec 23 ‘24

[theunwantedman]

I rather be heard and understood

than be seen.

Dec 23 ‘24

[theunwantedman]

I’m slowly fading away.

I don’t even have the energy to cry.

Nov 8 ‘24