Things To Show Oliver

Hi bubs!

[cocaineteas]

[thingstoshowoliver]

Mom: how many Popsicles have you eaten today

Me, laying in a bed of Popsicle wrappers: now is not the time to talk about my personal flaws as a human

[flopkween]

are the minions circumcised? 

[nerdjpg]

[sixpenceee]

Jesse and Katherine Oldfield of Eugene, Oregon are huge Harry Potter fans. A while back, when their eldest son, Sebastian, was just about 8 months old, they set up a Harry Potter-themed photo shoot for him in a graveyard. Now that they have a new baby boy named Theodore, they decided he needs his own Harry Potter moment as well.

Inspired by a scene from Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, the epic photo features the newborn son as a screeching Mandrake and Sebastian as Harry Potter. (Source)

[savannahgambino-deactivated2023]

My fiancé’s dad is Arabic, has a really thick accent and doesn’t really understand cursing so when he gets road rage he just puts a bunch of curse words together. My favorite so far “Up shut your ass, motherbitch.”

[holywaterbucketchallenge]

This is wonderful

[purrpleaesthetic]

[happy-go-puppy]

this dog is the future. poopin thru the fence

[memegod]

[fuckboysecurityllc]

Ain’t no law in space boi

[egberts]

that Florida feel when

always a small lizard in the house

[itsmikul]

It’s true. In fact, there’s one in my room right now.

I named him Henry.

Lookit him

[xx-raespexx-deactivated20170630]

i’m convinced florida is another planet

[prostatemodern]

[pleatedjeans]

[noneeyewithleftyork]

THERE’S A GUY SCALING THE TRUMP TOWER IN NYC WITH GIANT SUCTION CUPS LIKE A MISSION IMPOSSIBLE STUNT AND IM LAUGHING

[noneeyewithleftyork]

UPDATE: OKAY SO police are all over and they sent a window washer platform down from the top of the building but it was too far above him so then sent it back up and police just shattered a window slightly above him to try to get him and now he’s moving away from the hole in the window and continuing up he’s been climbing for like an hour now and they cant figure out how to get him down this is so incredible

[noneeyewithleftyork]

UPDATE: LOOK AT HIM GO

[noneeyewithleftyork]

UPDATE: they just inflated a giant inflatable on 56th street a third of nyc is in gridlock bc of this guy climbing the trump tower i cannOT BELIEVE

[noneeyewithleftyork]

UPDATE: he’s on the 18th floor this so surreal

[noneeyewithleftyork]

UPDATE: we’re approaching hour 2 of the climb and since the last update he’s made it up at least another 3 floors

[noneeyewithleftyork]

UPDATE:  SOMEONE TOOK A PICTURE OF HIM FROM INSIDE THE TOWER

A HERO

[noneeyewithleftyork]

update: apparently his name is steve and he’s from virginia

ASCEND, STEVE

[noneeyewithleftyork]

UPDATE: they just used suction cups to pull two panes of glass into the building a few floors above him

you know what they always say. you cant fight fire with fire, but you should always fight suction cups with suction cups

[noneeyewithleftyork]

UPDATE: HE’S TRYING TO GET AWAY FROM THEM STILL IM CRYING WHAT THE ENTIRE FUCK IS 2016????

[moonemojii]

[beyonceprivilege-deactivated201]

So a tip for my followers who work retail

Or wait or anything that requires you be on your feet for 6+ hours

Like you know how your feet feel all bruisey on the bottom after work and the pain still won’t be gone by the next morning and you have to deal w/ that pain AND the pain of the day to come

Well like my doctor told me that that bruisey feeling is cause standing on your feet all days causes fluids in your body to pool in your feet

So like at night he told me to elevate my legs with two pillows so the fluids can drain easier or w/e and ho damn.

It helps so much, Jesus Christ. No more limpy mornings.

Idk if this is even new information for y'all but just in case

I care about you

[outcheawavy]

I’ll verify this from when I was working retail.

Pillows under feet, under the sheet/blanket will keep it in place.

[voodoopunx]

Do you ever ‘wtf white people’ even though you are a white people.

[memewhore]

[aewm]

420 stands for “4got 2 0plogize” and this is how u use it

friend: hey dude why’s lester mad at u me: i broke his favorite mug and 420