C'est la vie @thinking-ellie - Tumblr Blog

The very best writing tip you will ever hear is this:

Analyze stories.

Don’t just listen to what other storytellers say you should do, figure out what you like about the stories you enjoy and learn to replicate that.

Want to learn about pacing? Examine stories you think flow fantastically. Want to learn about description? Study your favorite author’s descriptions. Want to learn about characterization? Critique your favorite characters. Want to learn about foreshadowing? Explore how it’s done in stories where the plot twist blew your mind.

Storytellers giving advice to other storytellers is fantastic and useful, but you will never know something as thoroughly as you know the things you figure out for yourself.

And by analyzing the stories you love instead of listening blindly to advice, you’ll never be swayed by the bias of other writers and you’ll never take in advice that’s suited for a story you wouldn’t enjoy writing.

So put on some thinking caps and go analyze those stories.

oddhour

pick-me-ups for writers

for the self-conscious beginner: No one makes great things until the world intimately knows their mediocrity. Don’t think of your writing as terrible; think of it as preparing to contribute something great.

for the self-conscious late bloomer: Look at old writing as how far you’ve come. You can’t get to where you are today without covering all that past ground. For that, be proud.

for the perfectionist: Think about how much you complain about things you love—the mistakes and retcons in all your favorite series—and how you still love them anyway. Give yourself that same space.

for the realist: There will be people who hate your story even if it’s considered a classic. But there will be people who love your story, even if it strange and unpopular.

for the fanfic writer: Your work is not lesser for not following canon. When you write, you’ve created a new work on its own. It can be, but does not have to be, limited by the source material. Canon is not the end-all, be-all.

for the writer’s blocked: It doesn’t need to be perfect. Sometimes you have to move on and commit a few writing sins if it means you can create better things out of it.

for the lost: You started writing for a reason; remember that reason. It’s ok to move on. You are more than your writing. It will be here if you want to come back.

acutelesbian

A lot of people ask me what my biggest fear is, or what scares me most. And I know they expect an answer like heights, or closed spaces, or people dressed like animals, but how do I tell them that when I was 17 I took a class called Relationships For Life and I learned that most people fall out of love for the same reasons they fell in it. That their lover’s once endearing stubbornness has now become refusal to compromise and their one track mind is now immaturity and their bad habits that you once adored is now money down the drain. Their spontaneity becomes reckless and irresponsible and their feet up on your dash is no longer sexy, just another distraction in your busy life. Nothing saddens and scares me like the thought that I can become ugly to someone who once thought all the stars were in my eyes.

fat-thin-skinny

this fucks me up every single time

acutelesbian

I never expected this to be my most popular poem out of the hundreds I’ve written. I was extremely bitter and sad when I wrote this and I left out the most beautiful part of that class.

After my teacher introduced us to this theory, she asked us, “is love a feeling? Or is it a choice?” We were all a bunch of teenagers. Naturally we said it was a feeling. She said that if we clung to that belief, we’d never have a lasting relationship of any sort.

She made us interview a dozen adults who were or had been married and we asked them about their marriages and why it lasted or why it failed. At the end, I asked every single person if love was an emotion or a choice.

Everybody said that it was a choice. It was a conscious commitment. It was something you choose to make work every day with a person who has chosen the same thing. They all said that at one point in their marriage, the “feeling of love” had vanished or faded and they weren’t happy. They said feelings are always changing and you cannot build something that will last on such a shaky foundation.

The married ones said that when things were bad, they chose to open the communication, chose to identify what broke and how to fix it, and chose to recreate something worth falling in love with.

The divorced ones said they chose to walk away.

Ever since that class, since that project, I never looked at relationships the same way. I understood why arranged marriages were successful. I discovered the difference in feelings and commitments. I’ve never gone for the person who makes my heart flutter or my head spin. I’ve chosen the people who were committed to choosing me, dedicated to finding something to adore even on the ugliest days.

I no longer fear the day someone who swore I was their universe can no longer see the stars in my eyes as long as they still choose to look until they find them again.

queengreendown

It’s almost as if nobody wants to admit that they might not be prepared to do the work it takes to love somebody. And it can be laborious. To be intimate with someone who is flawed (which is the standard) requires us to expose our own flaws. We don’t talk about the heavy responsibility of that. We don’t talk about how we’re too lazy or too cowardly sometimes. We instead accuse love of being elusive. It isn’t. It is omnipresent. It asks us to be better people. And sometimes we flat out refuse.

acutelesbian

A lot of people ask me what my biggest fear is, or what scares me most. And I know they expect an answer like heights, or closed spaces, or people dressed like animals, but how do I tell them that when I was 17 I took a class called Relationships For Life and I learned that most people fall out of love for the same reasons they fell in it. That their lover’s once endearing stubbornness has now become refusal to compromise and their one track mind is now immaturity and their bad habits that you once adored is now money down the drain. Their spontaneity becomes reckless and irresponsible and their feet up on your dash is no longer sexy, just another distraction in your busy life. Nothing saddens and scares me like the thought that I can become ugly to someone who once thought all the stars were in my eyes.

iwaschangedforgood

When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots are to become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the desire to mate every second of the day. It is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every part of your body. No … don’t blush. I am telling you some truths. For that is just being in love; which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over, when being in love has burned away. Doesn’t sound very exciting, does it? But it is!“

Louis de Bernières

deeplifequotes

Pay attention to what people say out of anger, they’ve been dying to tell you that.

Unknown (via deeplifequotes)

busket

where is that cat with the kind and reassuring face

charllahan

he?

busket

thank you…..

stand-up-gifs

lucasnoahs

shit son

just-shower-thoughts

“queue” is just “q” with 4 silent letters

thinking-ellie

they were in queue

artmagine

The amazing digital art of 爽々

intplady

Why am I reluctant to display affection towards people I am interested in starting a romantic relationship with? I hardly ever can bring myself to display interest towards them publicly, and realistically every person I have ever loved probably thinks I hated them. It’s almost as if I want them to think I dislike them? Or like it’s embarrassing for me to like them. Is this related to INTPs and maybe the competitive nature we have? Not wanting them to know just how perfect+ ”wanted” they are ??

A lot of the time we INTPs are quite certain of our feelings for someone else but are uncertain of their feelings for us. Because of this, we are wretchedly slow at developing relationships with other people. And because we are slow, this makes us feel that we are bad at it. (Which, I mean, I guess we’re not exactly stellar examples of How to Make Friends and Influence People.) Anyhow, we lack self-confidence in the area of human relationships, to put it lightly.

So, because we lack confidence, we feel that we have to hold onto every little bit of relationship that we can, which is both cute and pathetic. And how do we hold onto each little bit of relationship? Do we do it in a mature and healthy manner?

Haha, of course not!

Instead, we pretend that we are not terribly interested. Heaven forbid that the person we are interested in should be frightened away by our interest! We would rather suffer, not knowing, than face even a little rejection from someone we care about. So, we hold them at arm’s length, too frightened to offer them more space lest they reject it. We figure, if they think we aren’t that interested, they will think we’re normal. If they know that we think they’re perfect, they may think we’re too clingy or needy.

And yes, this is a very INTP-ish thing to do. I do it, sadly. I don’t want to do it, but it’s very difficult to get out of this mindset, so I can fully sympathize with you here. I suppose the thing to do is to mature, to fight against the crippling self-doubt and realize that the other person deserves a chance, too.

I hope this helps, and thanks for stopping by.