When Life Gives You Lemmas

⚜ {Nique}, 24. They/Her. Non-Binary. {Mathblr} Applied Mathematics Major. Filipinx-French-Canadian. Currently Taking: Applied Matrix Theory | Vector Calculus | Number Theory. Send Proofs.

[southernsideofme-deactivated201]

Well, I found your problem. You have minor water damage… Probably due to a leak somewhere. It might take a while to find it.

[rootbeergoddess]

How?!

[endlessfishery]

There are many benefits to being a Marine Biologist

[vacuously-true]

Since I have now been accused of being unable to understand deep mathematical ideas just because I'm Lutheran (with a 💋 emoji), I would like to announce I am giving up the standard Zermelo-Fraenkel axioms in favor of my new Lutheran axioms. Catch my 95 theorems nailed to the door of the math department.

[third-degree-math]

All 95 Theorems have been peer-reviewed and approved for publication.

[third-degree-math]

[vacuously-true]

I think we should replace "theorem" with "hot take" from now on. Pythagoras' hot take. Fundamental hot take of algebra

Hello! Thanks for sharing your hot take. Your opinion is Wrong and I am going to tell you Why.

“Hot take” should be reserved for statements which are conjectured or hypothesized but not proven. Despite not being proven, a statement should have some evidence in its favor before being presented as a hot take.

On the other hand, once something is proven, it is tea. To prove something is to spill the tea. A proof is an effortpost. Proper format for spilling the tea is to write the statement of the tea, followed by “in this essay I will,” and then the effortpost, beginning with statement of assumptions. A proper effortpost ends with “thank you for coming to my TED talk,” or “TED” for short. Allow me to demonstrate.

Fermat’s Little Tea.

For p, a ∈ ℤ, if p is a prime which does not divide a, then a^(p-1) = 1 (mod p).

In this essay I will let p, a ∈ ℤ, such that p is a prime which does not divide a. Lagrange’s theorem indicates that ℤ/pℤ* is a cyclic group under multiplication. As such the order of any element of ℤ/pℤ* is the order of the group, p-1. Since p does not divide a, a is an element of ℤ/pℤ*, and as such, its order in the group is p-1. Therefore a^(p-1) = 1 (mod p). TED.

The Four Color Tea is notable for being the first major tea spilled by computer. The Four Color Tea, then the Four Color Hot Take, was first proposed by Francis Guthrie in 1852. The tea was notoriously difficult to spill, but over a century later, in 1976, Wolfgang Haken and Kenneth Appel presented an effortpost using a very advanced (for the time) computer at the University of Illinois.

The first person to spill the tea on the Riemann Hot Take with an effortpost accepted by experts will be the recipient of a million dollar prize.

[afriendlyirin]

is this what having a stroke feels like

[third-degree-math]

[mathprofessorquotes]

“You can use this type of iteration for any set. Finite set. Well, I GUESS you could do it with an infinite set, but… you might be here for a while.”

— Discrete Math Professor

[mathprofessorquotes]

“The goal of mathematics is to do as little as possible.”

— Algebra professor

[mathprofessorquotes]

After the semester ended, I sent a friend request to my Honors Calculus III teacher.

A few days later, I learned why he took forever to grade stuff.

[third-degree-math]

[mathprofessorquotes]

“It sucks that we’re ending this semester with a lemma. Scratch that, we’re calling it a theorem. We deserve it.”

— Mathematical Logic professor

[mathprofessorquotes]

“Math isn’t discrete.”

— Discrete Math Professor

[mathprofessorquotes]

“Here’s where you nod and say, “yes I understand”, but I can tell you’re all dead inside.”

— Calculus Professor

[inima]

certified freak. 5 days a week (im in a union)

[escarei]

[third-degree-math]

Make them capitalists WEAK.

[mathprofessorquotes]

Student: What’s the use of these things in real life?

Abstract Algebra Professor: If you are asking that question, then you are in the wrong field.

[third-degree-math]

What y'all think of the new colour scheme?? The photo is actually from my Biomathematics project back in December 2019 "Cellular Automata animated Epidemic Models". The animation generated is based on the SIR model for the Common Cold. Bonus #1: the one for Measles on the right.

(Annnd given the current situation... yeah, well back in March, the people who I presented my project to essentially said "holy fucking shit")

Bonus #2:

Here's me showing my work at my uni's open house

[third-degree-math]

Anyone who knows a bit of Partial Differential Equations knows that finding the coefficients at the end is the icing on top of a multilayered cake of

pain.

[uuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]

eigenvalues are just the TLDR for a matrix

[associahedron]

You think this is a joke but it’s basically the statement of the Eckart–Young theorem.