Son, this is bait.

Helping the fish of Tumblr identify bait since 1947

[game-progress]

Have you heard about that sexist video game in which Metroid is running through a planet full of deadly aliens to save some princess damsel in distress named Samus? The game's called Metroid after the main protagonist running to save Samus. I'm shocked, it's 2015 and developers are still doing this? WTF?! I mean, I'm a hard core gamer girl and even I'm finding that sexist as hell. Almost as bad as Zelda trying to save the princess all the time. Sexist sexist sexist.

Yes, unlike a tech writer at the Huffington Post I have heard of the fearsome bounty hunter Metroid. Do you think it’s a co-incidence that you have to defeat ‘Mother Brain’. You have to go there and murder a woman. It clearly encourages violence against female creatures. And I agree, the fact Zelda has to rescue some nameless princess game after game is 512bit misogyny.

Did you know Nintendo have a track record with this? For example the character Punch Out, is a man. The racer F-Zero, also a man. The character Pikmin, also a man who enslaves native POCs. The character Fire Emblem is a feudal lord who lords of over, you guessed it, hordes of women. 

Are Nintendo’s games inclusive for everyone or exclusive for anyone who isn’t a white male. I’ll let you decide. (actually I won’t let you decide I’ll decide for you, the answer is they’re sexist and you and your extended family should feel deep shame if you play them).

[aikharmony]

Did you mean Link having to save Zelda all the time? Zelda is the princess, not the warrior. Please check your facts before posting so actual hardcore gamers will take this seriously. This is an important issue and alluding to the wrong characters won’t help your case.

[this-is-bait]

[this-is-bait]

Chronicles of Bait II: Infinite Chum

(I'm still taking care of a few on-shore commitments, but here's something to hold you over until I'm really back.) Recently, my childhood home was utterly destroyed by a maelstrom. The few survivors migrated to a nearby river with seemingly infinite tributaries. A few weeks ago, I decided to stop by and try to help the survivors in whatever way I could. At first, I was pleasantly surprised. This place seemed more hospitable than our former home, and I even had a fan club there - many fish shared pictures of me from this very archive amongst themselves. But they were not the only survivors. The bottom-feeders from my previous Chronicle had also made the river their new home. Here, however, many of them had formed a bait-worshipping cult - at least, that was the only conclusion I could draw from their incessant chanting of "never be a woman" and... "jonphint"? I still don't know how to spell that. I say "bait-worshipping" because it turned out that "jonphint" was their name for a fisherwoman who filled her net with the maelstrom's victims. Or, at least, tried to - from what I gather, she and the others have been waging a war over the corpses (now mere skeletons) for months. It wasn't long before a few of these fishermen heeded the bottom-feeders' apparent call for death, and the river became littered with their hooks - some bare, some with bait so tempting even I could barely resist a nibble. One even tried to redirect the water toward his personal fishing pond - incurring the wrath of the bottom-feeders, other fishermen, and even a flamboyant lobster. (The cultists and lobster swam to the pond on purpose to capsize his boat. I don't know if they succeeded.) It was complete chaos. The fishermen's war moved to the river. The bottom-feeders went into a frenzy, unable to tell fish from bait, and devouring them all alike. I tried to flee, only to find that the war had become global. There is no escape now. Your only hope is this: until this surface war ends, if you see anything coloured in purple and green, SWIM AWAY IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE. Pick a side, and the fishermen have already won. (I lost my camera in the anarchy. I'll try to get something once I find a new one.)

[this-is-bait]

Fishy fish, my dear lovely tuna of the sea. Where fort art though my dearest fish of the fishkins? I need your help in guiding through the bait that is the sea of tumblr.

I shall return…

Soon.

[dipshit-knight-blog]

The Journalists have spoken.

They say that gamers are irrelevant.

They say that gamers are dead.

This is their message to us.

I say it’s time we send them our own message.

[turbovirginbonerlord]

[aceofsnakes]

you can talk about equality all you want but I’ll still feel that men are expendable and women should be protected at all costs

guess I have internalised misandry

[ermac-kisser-deactivated2023072]

[nellucnhoj]

How to deal with internet trolls.

[ophidahlia]

Gay Pride™ is subordination to the State and Empire.  Gay Pride™ is homage to capitalism, patriarchy, and white supremacy.  Gay Pride™ is co‐optation of queer radicalism by liberals, Democrats, academics, hipsters, and NGOs.  Gay Pride™ is the eradication of trans bodies and narratives, and queer militancies.  Gay Pride™ is gala events for the elite.  Gay Pride™ is walking past homeless queer youth.  Gay Pride™ is assimilation into straight society.  Gay Pride™ is corporate.  Gay Pride™ is destruction of queer histories of mutual‐aid, resistance, shame, promiscuity, creativity, humor, love, community, brutality, poverty, and disease.  Gay Pride™ is “we’re just like you”.  Gay Pride™ is safe, privileged, accommodationist, vanilla, temporary, and very boring.  Gay Pride™ is to ignore trans women of color being beat by police and murdered by street bigots.  Gay Pride™ is to achieve equality and sameness, to settle and be conditional, to compromise. Nothing more. Always less.  Gay Pride™ is forgetting about those affected by HIV/AIDS.  Gay Pride™ is “straight‐acting”, “masc only”, “promise I’m not that gay tho”, “sry no effeminate guys”, “not into Asians”, “prefer white guys”, “no fatties or trannies”.  Gay Pride™ is gender binary.  Gay Pride™ is on the sidewalk, obeying the police when they say the party is over.  Gay Pride™ is neglecting all of the queer and trans prisoners held captive by the State.  Gay Pride™ is marriage and military.  Gay Pride™ is poor people of color being pushed out of their neighborhoods by a white gay gentry.  Gay Pride™ is refusing to avenge religious fundamentalists who cause young queers to commit suicide.  Gay Pride™ is “things aren’t that bad in Russia.”  Gay Pride™ is being able to participate in the military‐industrial complex, kill and rape people in other countries in the name of “freedom”, yet be fired from a minimum wagejob in the US because of your sexuality and/or gender identity.  Gay Pride™ is giving a shit about corporate media and entertainment.  Gay Pride™ is pretending electoral politics will bring about social change.  Gay Pride™ is a rearranging of the existing social order only to accommodate a few, as opposed to collective liberation and dismantling of oppressive systems.  Gay Pride™ is nationalism.  Gay Pride™ is to water down and tranquilize ‐ to make “normal”.  Gay Pride™ is men and women who arm themselves to kill people who are deemed criminals, deviants, and terrorists by the State.  Gay Pride™ is business casual or muscle tees.  Gay Pride™ is the invisibilization of people of color.  Gay Pride™ is to dismiss queer Palestinians being murdered by the Israeli apartheid state.  Gay Pride™ is gay men being misogynist pigs and committing verbal, physical, and sexual violence against women and it being “okay” since they’re gay.  Gay Pride™ is obscuring histories of Western colonialism and silencing Indigenous voices.  Gay Pride™ is “speak English or go back to your country”. Gay Pride™ is a mythology and an opiate.

— William Lukas, Artist

[wood-poppy-deactivated20140829]

unfollow me if you think biological sex is a thing

unfollow me if you think trans girls are male or trans boys are female

unfollow me if you are truscum

unfollow me if you think you need dysphoria to be trans

unfollow me if you think reverse...

[the-dragon-feminist]

Do you considered there may be a point at which to draw the line when a relationship is considered abusive or becoming abusive? I mean, when the consistent hitting by a woman /becomes/ abusive (or by a man)? I understand playful tapping, and small punches on the arm/shoulder, but I don't think slapping, punching, or the /intention/ to /harm/ the significant other is ever deserved by any means, via a man or a woman. I just want to know your perspective on the word "abusive relationship"

I have already stated numerous fucking times that there are limits.If a woman is beating on a man for absolutely no fucking reason, that is not okay. But if she is provoked, it’s her right to assert her dominance.

[h0ld-back-the-night-deactivated]

.

[this-is-bait]

Check out this doozy: http://officialjeffgoldblum.tumblr.com/post/91371127241/most-classic-novels-are-classics-because-they-were

[this-is-bait]

Chronicles of Bait: Rock /b/ottom

Earlier today, in light of recent events, I took a short trip to the sea of my forefathers - the one they now call 4chan.

But not just any part of that sea, no - I ventured into the darkest trench: /b/.

I looked into a random crevice, labeled with a human woman with pink hair and a bare torso. What I read there was a strange tale about a woman whose ex-boyfriend had, in her words, “‘raped’ her” (yes, with quotes). While this was not the central topic (it was about a concert, an impromptu makeout session with a friend, and ensuing awkwardness), it stood out to me more than the rest, but I did not know why…

And then I remembered.

Schools - no, hordes - of local bottom-feeders swarmed into the crevice, attracted to the human and held by the tale. I barely escaped without being crushed - and then I heard them, in their feeding frenzy:

"Tits plz" “Tits or gtfo” “‘Raped’ you? Yeah, you know that’s bullshit, now show us your tits.”

I shuddered at the revolting sound and the violence with which they devoured… whatever they were eating. But then a thought came to me:

There has recently been a war between the fish of Tumblr and of this trench. The fish of this trench are known to be unable to resist the allure of human mammary glands (for whatever reason). It is their custom to devour anything with the word “rape” carved into it. Then why would someone with a completely unrelated tale invoke both of these attributes using an image of a type commonly seen in the Tumblr Sea, if not to-

And then it hit me.

I had stumbled upon the ultimate bait.

The bottom-feeders would never know what hit them.

Artist’s rendition of its creator:

[this-is-bait]

Chewingthatbroccoli has to be the worst fisherman I've ever seen.

“I don’t believe in Cis-genderism. I am Trans-black.”

[this-is-bait]

Tumblr user mmmqimmedat appears to be bait.

[this-is-bait]

disabilityfest.tumblr.com/ I’m sorry fishy fish

The bait was more obvious when I first got this, but it seems this fisherman has learned a few things since then - I had to go a few pages in to find some hooks.

But then this almost happened:

[foxythepirate-fox-deactivated20]

End cisphobia by clicking this

[truscummie]

if you think that neo pronouns are ok go kill yourself

[juicy-melons]

idislikecispeople is a liar. I created tucute and its for everyone, not just transtrenders. Whether you’re cis, trans, transtrender, other-kin, demi, poop, or anything in between. Yay!

[alivechihiro]

burst into flames and die

[juicy-melons]

unf yeah baby just shove it right in there

[alivechihiro]

you mean a knife? into your throat? don’t mind if i do

[juicy-melons]

Ooh kinky, I like it. Just make sure to lick it first. I want a part of you inside me while you do it.