This'll be good

watch my fat horse transform with memes in between the updates

[bob-belcher]

[fluent-in-lesbianism]

HERSTORY WAS JUST MADE IN VIRGINIA Y’ALL

[the-memedaddy]

[taquito]

this video is making me lose my god damn mind

[m86-deactivated20171116]

[a-very-original-name]

[three-days-straight-blog]

Beyoncé: I woke up like this *FLAWLESS*

Me: I woke up like this *I feel like I'm dying and I'm pretty sure there is dried drool on my forehead*

[daily-showerthoughts]

The dried up worms on sidewalks after rainy days are like beef jerky for birds

[tiredpug]

i work at a gym largely frequented by older women, and today as one of them left after her workout she accidentally pulled the entire door handle off and just slowly looked at her bicep in horror as if she was terrified of her new strength. it was beautiful.

[president-coriolanus-snow]

So my friends getting his leg amputated today, and he’s texting me and he goes “This sucks! I’m losing all my tattoos.”

I’m like “That’s what you’re worried about? What about your leg?”

He goes “I DIDN’T PAY FOR MY LEG!!!”

[trapcard]

me to myself: girl if you actually applied yourself in like….anything you’d be dangerous bitch

[orestian-deactivated20180120]

laws are imaginary but lawyers… are real

[orestian-deactivated20180120]

@unpatchedghost look … my policy on this whole epistomological debate is that things i can fuck are, subjectively, real

[dykejedi-deactivated20170430]

when i was little and i went to church people would talk about “fearing god.” they would use ‘’fear’ to describe like a way of respecting him while understanding his power and i never knew what that  meant until i met a fucking horse 

[rhombusgirldump]

Cole doesn’t help

[three-days-straight-blog]

me: gets personally offended when the best photo in a calendar isn't for my birth month

[clock-heart-deactivated20251220]

in the morning stomach: hey we’re starving and dehydrated me: Eats and Drinks

stomach: whta the fuck??? hwat the Hell andfuck

[thekwikemart]

[despicablewench]

it’s still so wild to me that john mulaney is only 35 years old because whenever he tells stories about his childhood i can’t help but picture him in like the 1960s playing baseball and going to the malt shop and saying things like “why i oughta”