THREE OUT OF FIVE

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BEST OF 2017

It’s almost a new year which means it’s once again time for my personal Top Ten movies of the past twelve months.

There have definitely been some less-than-great movies this year from true turkeys such as The Mummy and Alien: Covenant to movies that didn’t quite live up to my own expectations such as Justice League and Jigsaw. I would also add Star Wars: The Last Jedi to this latter category as, whilst not a bad movie, it personally left me feeling a little underwhelmed and didn’t live up to The Force Awakens or even last year’s Rogue One, both of which made my Top Ten.

Without further ado, please enjoy my Top Ten of 2017.

10. LIFE

With sci-fi blockbusters Star Wars: The Last Jedi and Blade Runner 2049 smashing this year’s box-office, it would be all too easy for this sci-fi/horror released way back in March to be forgotten about. However, with a great cast and even better story, it would a real shame if this were to happen. Life is essentially “Alien meets The Blob” and follows a crew of scientists on a space station who are the first people to discover signs of intelligent extraterrestrial life in the form of a small one-celled organism. When the organism quickly begins to learn, grow and evolve, they realise that the organism could be far more dangerous than anticipated. Released in the same year as Alien: Covenant, it manages to be ten times scarier and a hundred times more necessary with a killer ending to boot. A must-see for any sci-fi fans.

9. LOGAN

Out of all the superhero franchises, the X-Men cinematic universe has always been the most willing to push the boundaries and step out of its comfort zone; see last year’s Deadpool and next year’s horror-themed The New Mutants for evidence of this. Even with this in mind, I don’t think anybody expected such a stunning, artistic piece for Jackman’s final appearance as Wolverine. Jackman is fantastic as Logan at his most tragic (and violent) but I felt Stewart’s performance as the aged Professor X was a personal highlight and I would put the “psychic seizure” moments up there with my favourite scenes of the year. If this is definitely the last we see of this incarnation of Wolverine on screen - a high likelihood thanks to the recent Fox-Disney deal - there could be no better way to go out.

8. THE DISASTER ARTIST

I admit I am a sucker for so-called “bad movies” and followers of my yearly movie lists will know the Sharknado movies have appeared more than one occasion. Needless to say, when I originally watched The Room - often referred to as the “Citizen Kane of bad movies” - I was blown away in the best way. As it turns out, the behind-the-scenes story of The Room is as fun and outright bonkers as the movie itself. The Disaster Artist follows the story of director Tommy Wiseau and wannabe actor Greg Sestero as they accidentally make one of the worst films ever made. Those looking for answers to some of the most-asked questions (how did Tommy finance the movie? where is Tommy really from?) may be left wanting but, within the confines of the movie itself, Tommy’s question-dodging makes for some of the funniest moments of the movie. As well as being a great movie about filmmaking in general, it also manages to be one of the funniest films of the year. The Franco brothers are fantastic as the co-leads but I genuinely believe James Franco should be in Oscar talks for his spot-on portrayal of Tommy. Considering Tommy’s misguided belief that The Room should receive an Oscar, I feel it would be hilarious for The Disaster Artist to be nominated.

7. MOTHER!

This is likely to be the most controversial and divisive movie on my list this year but I personally thought it was absolutely great and had to be in my Top Ten. Aronofsky has made some strange movies in the past but it’s fair to say this movie is way more abstract and unsettling that any before it which is why it seems to have alienated some of its audience. The movie follows a young woman whose life starts to unravel when her poet husband invites a stranger into their home. Saying much more would mean going into spoiler territory and Mother! is a movie that greatly benefits from going in blind. There is a lot to be read from the movie which is essentially one big allegory but, even without looking for hidden layers, I found Mother! to be one hell of an unsettling psychological horror. One scene in particular towards the end - those who have seen it will know exactly what I’m talking about - truly shocked me and caused an audience-member I watched it with to actually cry out in horror. Any horror movie that causes such an involuntary, visceral response from anybody deserves a place on my list.

6. SPIDER-MAN: HOMECOMING

Since his introduction to the MCU (Marvel Cinematic Universe) in Captain America: Civil War, I never thought for a moment that I would be disappointed by the new Spider-Man movie. That said, it managed to even surpass my expectations to become one of my favourite movies of the year. Tom Holland is an inspired choice for Peter Parker and I feel he manages to combine the characters of Peter and Spider-Man more seamlessly than either McGuire or Garfield before him. There were more MCU links that I’d expected and even more of Tony Stark than the trailers had suggested. However, rather than suggesting an lack of trust in the Spider-Man property, I felt that it actually grounded Spider-Man more in the universe the audience are used to and believe it would have actually been odd if they hadn’t taken this direction. Michael Keaton as The Vulture was another great choice and, even out of his mechanical flight-suit, he is a worthy opponent for the titular hero. Here’s to hoping for many more Spider-Man appearances in the MCU as, if they do it right, Peter Parker could soon become the real heart of the franchise.

5. BEAUTY AND THE BEAST

When news broke that a live-action Beauty And The Beast remake was being made, most peoples’ first question was ‘why?’ The more negative critics said it smacked of unoriginality and cynicism on Disney’s part but, after watching it, it became clear that it better than the sum of its parts. For me, if the upcoming Disney remakes are half as good as Beauty And The Beast, I would be more than happy to check them out. It seems like the entire cast and crew had a blast making the movie but the stand-out performance is Luke Evans who puts his heart and soul into bringing the arrogant, villainous Gaston to life and clearly has fun hamming it up to the max. The general plot and songs are almost identical to the original animation and it’s clear the filmmakers have taken a “ain’t-broke-don’t-fix” approach but still add enough changes and a couple of original tunes to make it feel fresh. Possibly the most re-watchable of all the movies on my Top Ten this year.

4. PADDINGTON 2

When the first Paddington movie came out I went in with fairly low expectations. After all, how good could a quaint movie with a marmalade-loving CGI bear as its lead really be? However it managed to completely charm me in a way that I hadn’t expected and the sheer niceness of it and old-fashioned aesthetic totally won me over. Expectations were therefore high for the sequel and so I was pleased to find my expectations were more than exceeded.  The story is so simple – Paddington wants to buy his aunt a present for her 100th birthday – but quickly escalates into a fantastic set of scenes where Paddington finds a job and eventually finds himself locked up in prison. The idea of throwing a young, idealistic character such as Paddington against tough, grizzled characters like the prisoners he is forced to live with is a touch of genius and the end result is more charming and heart-warming than any recent movie I can remember.

3. WAR FOR THE PLANET OF THE APES

When Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes was released in 2011, I wasn’t actually a fan of the original Apes movies. However I was quickly won over by the story of Caesar the chimp and have enjoyed every movie in the franchise since. The third in the rebooted series is very much the end of Caesar’s tale and focuses on him and his group of apes as they attempt to survive one final stand against a group of desperate human survivors led by Woody Harrelson’s Colonel. Whilst Harrelson is great in the villainous role, full kudos goes to Andy Serkis whose mo-cap genius truly brings Caesar to life and the story is so enthralling it is almost easy to forget what a technology marvel War really is. Many of the shots of Caesar (along with the other apes) are done in extreme close-up which, even in the prior Apes movies, would have not been possible or at least would not look as incredible as they do in this movie. Wherever the Apes series goes now, it’s safe to say that this is a fantastic, fitting end to the current story arc and one of the most emotionally moving stories of the year.

2. THOR: RAGNAROK

Just when I thought Spider-Man: Homecoming would be the funniest Marvel movie of the year, Thor: Ragnarok came along and became probably the funniest Marvel movie of all time! When it was revealed that Taika Waititi would be directing the latest Thor movie, some people thought his particular comedic style could steamroll the film and reduce any potential stakes set up by the existing MCU movies. It clear after watching the movie that this is not the case; I mean did anyway expect the total destruction of Asgard to occur in this movie?! Thor: Ragnarok is effectively a ‘buddy movie” with Thor and The Hulk teaming up, along with Loki and a ragtag group of warriors, against Hela the goddess of death. Whilst the stakes are as high as they have ever been, the comedy factor is the biggest take-away from the movie and I simply cannot review it without mentioning Waititi’s role as benevolent rock-creature Korg who acts as a vessel for the director’s comedic chops and is by far one of the funniest MCU characters to date. Whilst the big event lies with next year’s long-awaited Infinity War, audiences have been truly spoiled after receiving such great MCU movies this year. Here’s to many more ahead!

1. IT: CHAPTER ONE

As a fan of all things horror-related, there was no way IT wouldn’t be at the top of this year’s list. It took 31 years but they finally did it. They finally made an adaptation of – in my opinion – Stephen King’s magnum opus that is worthy of the title and a whole lot of fun to boot. The basic story follows a group of children who are forced to fight for survival against a supernatural, killer clown that is killing the townsfolk. However the tale has always been much more than that; a coming-of-age story, a slice of nostalgic Americana, a twisted “adventure” tale of sorts… Everything that the 1990 TV movie got wrong, the remake manages to get right, from the children interacting the way children actually act with each other (see the 90’s version for the very definition of overacting) to removal of the more schmaltzy moments.  There have been some criticisms of the amount of CGI in the movie – required, I would say, to pull off many of the weirder scenes from the book – and the lack of true scares. Whilst I agree wholeheartedly that the movie could have been a lot scarier, Skarsgard’s performance of Pennywise the Dancing Clown manages to be extremely unsettling nonetheless and I feel it may even top Tim Curry’s from the original for me. IT has become the highest-grossing horror movie of all time and it’s great to see it’s been commercially as well as critically acclaimed. We have to wait until 2019 for It: Chapter Two but I have no doubt it’ll be worth waiting for...

Well that’s that! It’s been another great year of movies and it would be utterly dismissive not to add some honourable mentions for the likes of Wonder Woman, Get Out, Baby Driver, Guardians Of The Galaxy: Vol 2, Kong: Skull Island, John Wick 2 and The Lego Batman Movie, all of which were pretty damn great and made it very difficult choosing my Top Ten this year.

2018 looks to be a great year ahead in cinema with superhero big-hitters Deadpool 2, Black Panther, Ant-Man And The Wasp, The New Mutants, Aquaman and a little movie called Avengers: Infinity War as well as The Predator, Ready Player One, Insidious: The Last Key and, probably my most anticipated movie if next year Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom.

See you all on the other side!

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BEST OF 2016

Well, it’s the end of another year and what a year it’s been! Some critics have suggested 2016 has been the worst year in film in a long time but, rest assured, that isn’t to say there haven't been a good number of highlights amidst the disappointment. Before I list my personal top ten, some noteworthy disappointing releases included superhero blockbusters Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, Suicide Squad and X-Men Apocalypse; all of which were critically slammed despite raking it in at the box-office and some of which deserved a little more credit than they received, despite their admittedly shonky final results. Even more importantly, Sharknado 4: The 4th Awakens did NOT make the cut this year and, after appearing on my top ten list over the last couple of years, it's a real shame to admit the Sharknado team may have finally jumped the, uh... you-know-what. Anyway, without further ado, here are my personal Top 10 movies of 2016! 10. DON'T BREATHE The set-up to this psychological thriller is as simple as it comes; three young amateur burglars decide to break into the house of an old blind man to rob him for “one last job”. However, they don’t count on the elderly resident being military-trained and a lot less infirm than he seems. At risk of spoiling what is already in this movie’s trailer, the tables are very quickly turned on our three thieves who are forced to fight their way out of the house before their assailant gets to them first. There are twists and turns throughout the movie, the result of which is much better and scarier than the sum of its parts. It has genuinely been a very long time I’ve felt quite as tense in the cinema and the tension itself is expertly crafted, especially during certain scenes where the threesome have to feel their way around a pitch-black basement whilst their antagonist is silently hunting for them. If horror is tension, this could easily be one of the scariest films of the year and, with its tight run-time and low-budget grittiness, it’s definitely the most commendable thriller of the last 12 months. 9. FANTASTIC BEASTS AND WHERE TO FIND THEM Whilst I have enjoyed the Harry Potter movies, I feel they haven’t really done the book series justice. When I heard they were going to make a movie of Rowling’s minuscule Comic Relief book, I was slightly cynical to say the least. This was even before it was announced this was in fact due to be the first in FIVE Fantastic Beasts movies which even the biggest Potter fan may have considered a cash-grab. Add this all together and I have to admit I was not overly excited about the movie. However, once the trailers were released and the hype-machine began to run, I started to find myself intrigued and suddenly realised I’d always considered the least interesting of the Harry Potter universe to be Potter himself. Take him and his “Chosen One”, premonition-heavy story arc out of the equation and the filmmakers would have free reign to explore the Wizarding World outside the walls of Hogwarts and transport it Jazz-age New York City. The end result did not disappoint, partly due to Eddie Redmayne’s likable lead Newt Scamander as well as his magical briefcase full of beasts. As Newt has to round up his escaped beasts, I was reminded a little of Pokémon – albeit with a briefcase "capsule" instead of a Pokeball – with Newt having to “catch ‘em all” and utilise his various beasts to assist in his quest, especially considering the bird-like Swooping Evil that can be released from a hand-sized cocoon to defend Newt and reflect magical attacks. The creatures themselves are a real highlight and expand on Rowling’s original ideas to create fully-formed beasts; my favourite of which is the platypus-like Niffler who is obsessed with stealing shiny things and completely steals the show in the process. After having watched this movie, I am genuinely looking forward to the forthcoming Beasts movies, cash-grab or not! 8. THE JUNGLE BOOK The newest addition to the current run of live-action Disney remakes is without a doubt the best so far. Long gone are the days of the "Uncanny Valley" when you are able to watch photo-realistic wolves and tigers speak like humans and not think anything of it. Not only are the CGI creatures expertly crafted and voiced, the entire rainforest and background animation is some of the best I've ever seen, creating a full immersive experience especially when watched in 3D. This movie would have been higher on my list had the actor playing Mowgli been slightly less grating but overall I was enthralled by the movie and the incredible scenes with King Louie smashing his way through the monkey temple will stay with me for a very long time to come. 7. DOCTOR STRANGE The moment Doctor Strange begins, it is immediately apparent it's very different to the rest of the Marvel movies to date... Bringing the idea of real actual magic, parallel dimensions and time-manipulation into the Marvel Cinematic Universe, you can't help but wonder where Marvel will take their super-franchise with such grand themes to play with. However, as a stand-alone original story, it holds its own and Cumberbatch is perfect in the role as the likeable, pompous super-doctor. The reality-warping city-folding scenes are adequately impressive and, whilst Doctor Strange is not one of Marvel's strongest movies or characters, it will be a hell of a lot of fun to see him interact with the Avengers in the coming movies, particularly if his short post-credit scene with Thor is anything to go by. Roll on the Infinity War! 6. ROOM This drama follows Joy and her young son Jack who have been kept prisoner in a grim basement ever since Joy was kidnapped seven years prior. Whilst the movie goes to so extremely dark places, Jack's innocence and naivety keep him perpetually upbeat in spite of their awful situation and it is ultimately a movie about optimism in the face of adversity. I went into this film with little prior knowledge and found myself entirely engrossed in the mother and son relationship and how they learn to adapt to their life both inside and outside their basement room. Whilst Brie Larson is outstanding in the role as Joy, it is Jacob Tremblay's performance as her son Jack that is the most impressive and, considering his age at nine years old, it is even more commendable that he outshines his co-star. 5. UNDER THE SHADOW This Iranian ghost story is without a doubt one of the best horror movies of the year. Set amidst the Iran-Iraq war, the movie follows Shideh who is left to look after her daughter Dora alone when her husband is called for duty. After an armed missile becomes lodged in the roof of their apartment building and the residents start to depart for safer areas, Shideh refuses to leave her flat which turns out to be a bad idea when her daughter starts to add strangely and it appears she may have been possessed by an evil Djinn... Under The Shadow is the director's debut feature film and it is a truly impressive, atmospheric chiller in its own right. Whilst it isn't the highest horror film on my top ten list, it could in fact be the scariest movie of the year and has some horrific imagery that will stay with you long after the credits roll. 4. ROGUE ONE: A STAR WARS STORY As with Fantastic Beasts, Rogue One is proof that even the most successful franchises can be freshened up every now and again with a spin-off set apart from the central saga. In the case of Rogue One, we follow Jyn Erso and a group of misfit rebels on their mission to steal the plans for a Darth Vader's new planet-destroying super-weapon the Death Star. Whilst it acts as a stand-alone story it is also set directly before Episode 4: A New Hope which means there are plenty of opportunities for some appearances and cameos from existing characters including that of Mr Vader himself. During the few minutes of screen-time Vader has, he's the most powerful, intimidating and utterly badass he's been since his very first appearance. Without spoiling too much, the tone of the movie is a little darker than most of the Star Wars saga which successfully sets it apart from the rest and it has some fantastic imagery throughout; Stormtroopers patrolling a palm tree covered beach anybody? The standout character of the movie however is sass-bot K-2SO who, it is explained, was reprogrammed and accidentally ended up with his sarcasm setting turned up to 11. Whilst he has tones of Threepio, he is a hell of a lot more likeable and fun and is ultimately the movie's much-needed comic relief. With the sad news of Carrie's Fisher's passing, Rogue One is also a strong reminder of her contribution towards the entire Star Wars franchise and a testament to the character of Princess Leia. Despite some initial trepidation towards Star Wars spin-off movies every other year, it seems most people have been left hoping that every Star Wars movie to come will be half as good as Rogue One. 3. THE CONJURING 2 I admit I wasn't a huge fan of the original Conjuring movie or its evil-doll spin-off Annabelle so I went into the second instalment with low expectations. As it happens, the sequel is far superior and is an effective horror in its own right. Wilson and Farmiga have now fully settled into their roles as the ghost-hunting Warrens and this time they have a real task on their hands... Not only is their new case linked to a the ghost of a creepy old man called Bill and a nightmarish entity The Crooked Man haunting a house in Enfield, they also have to tackle a horrific demonic nun that seems to have a history with Lorraine Warren. The evil nun is the key selling point of the movie, so much so that she is getting her own Annabelle-esque spin-off in due course. There is one tension-filled scene in the movie which equates to Lorraine walking towards the camera in a dark room with a painting of the nun in the background of the shot which is quite possibly the single most terrifying scene I've experienced in the last few years. 2. THE HATEFUL EIGHT It's safe to say that Tarantino is not held in as high-regard as he may have once been in his heyday. However, The Hateful Eight is an absolute blast and despite the fact this is one of the first movies I watched in 2016, it speaks volumes that is is still fresh in my mind and remains high on my top ten of the year. Some people had an issue with the runtime of the movie and, whilst it does exceed three hours in length, I didn't find it bloated whatsoever. The movie's length gives you chance to get to know the characters and, like a lot of Tarantino movies, most of the fun is simply watching the characters interact and spar with each other. Overall, the movie is a timeless love-letter to the western genre and it is Tarantino's best for a very long time. NB. It's worth noting The Hateful Eight was released in January here in the U.K. hence its addition to this year's list 1. CAPTAIN AMERICA: CIVIL WAR For me, it really was no contest for movie of the year. It took thirteen movies for the Marvel Cinematic Universe to get there - two of them featuring all active Avengers - but Kevin Feige and the Marvel Studios team have finally made a near-perfect ensemble superhero mash-up that visually could be directly ripped from the comic books themselves. Whilst not strictly an Avengers movie, following so closely after last year's sub-par Avengers: Age of Ultron, the filmmakers still manage to give every single active Avenger and their associates their five minutes to shine whilst adding new hero Black Panther into the mix. Plus introducing Spider-Man to the franchise. Plus completing the story-arcs in both Captain America and Iron Man series... This was no mean feat and there was absolutely no guarantee it would work out in the way it did. Lucky for them, the movie was a huge success critically and, for me, is an ever better ensemble piece than either official Avengers movie to date. The airport scene where each hero squares off against another is an absolutely incredible scene and brings me so much joy every time I watch it. The Infinity War movies are going to be much, MUCH bigger in terms of scale and number of characters so here's to hoping Marvel can utilise the same magic in Civil War during be two-part saga. Either way, I can't wait to see how it'll all pan out! This year's other noteworthy releases include Finding Dory, Zootropolis, Kubo and the Two Strings, Deadpool, The Neon Demon and Arrival; all of which were all strong contenders for the final list but didn't quite make the grade. As for next year there is a LOT to look forward including a whole heap of superhero outings for the Justice League, Guardians of the Galaxy, Logan, Spider-Man, Thor, Wonder Woman, Lego Batman and the Power Rangers as well as other potential big-hitters such as Alien: Covenant, Kong: Skull Island, Jumanji, The Mummy and Saw: Legacy. Oh, and of course The Emoji Movie which will likely be 💩... Here's to hoping that 2017 lives up to its potential! As always, this is my personal top-ten but let me know whether you agree or disagree and what your favourite films of 2016 were!

[threeoutoffive]

Free internet. Good rates. Ignore the quiet giggling in the middle of the night... #horror #clown #scary

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BEST OF 2015

Its the most wonderful time of the year yet again. That's right! Time to choose my personal top ten movies over the last twelve months! Now the most highly anticipated movie of all time has finally been released - and every other movie worth watching has politely kept its distance - I can honestly say making this year's list has been the most difficult yet. Whilst the movies forming 2015's blockbuster-packed "Summer of Death" were less... consistent than people had hoped, there were without doubt some truly incredible movie-going experiences on offer including a number of films that went straight to top of the box-office. 10. SHARKNADO 3: OH HELL NO! For the second year running, a Sharknado movie has made the list. In spite of its silliness - or more likely because of it - I hold so much genuine love for this series and they honestly seem to be improving in quality. This addition to the series starts with a sharknado destroying the White House and ends up with sharks in space and laser chainsaws. No other comedy this year has made me laugh as much as Sharknado 3 and for this alone it is more than deserving of its number 10 position on this list. As always, please don't hate me for this! 9. EX MACHINA "There is nothing more human than the will to survive..." I feel like, in this year of light-speed space battles and dinosaur-on-dinosaur action, this small-scale psychological sci-fi thriller did not get the recognition it deserves and risks being forgotten about. However, it's more than worth checking out and (spoiler for the list ahead) is my second-best movie starring Oscar Isaac this year... The premise is simple; a Steve Jobs-type recruits a low-level employee to put his latest in AI technology to the test. The AI in question just happens to be an attractive, intriguing fembot and it quickly becomes a question of who is testing who. This movie is arguably one of the most well-acted films of the year and the premise doesn't do justice to the dark story which plays out like one of the best episodes of Black Mirror and poses a lot of questions about morality and how technology can advance. 8. BONE TOMAHAWK Bone Tomahawk is an unusual mix of western and horror that I would have never heard about if an incredibly brutal scene from the movie had not been "accidentally" leaked online. The scene in question featured a man being tortured and butchered with tomahawks and whilst the entire movie does not match this level of gore, it was enough to to appeal to the horror fan in me. The film begins with the kidnapping of a woman by troglodytes causing her husband and a ragtag team of townsfolk to go on a rescue mission into the savage's territory. It is an interesting piece of genre filmmaking and one of my favourite horror films of the year. 7. AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON "A new age begins..." The second team outing for Thor, Iron Man, Captain America and their buddies does not live up to the spectacle of the first movie but is still a damn-fine action flick. The new characters introduced feel like welcome additions to the franchise and the first scene, featuring every Avenger storming a Hydra castle stronghold, was worth the ticket price alone, looking just like it had been ripped out of the splash-pages of the comics. Whilst Ultron was not as interesting a villain as Loki, it was still extremely enjoyable to see the team together again and it was great that Hawkeye got some of the best lines after his prior disservice. 6. MAD MAX: FURY ROAD "What a lovely day..." There were few movies released this year as visually stunning as Fury Road, The main criticism of this movie was for it's minimalist plot but this should not be confused with underdevelopment of the characters or story as there is still an element of world-building that pays off even if you have not watched the original Mad Max movies. Furiosa is one of my favourite characters of the year and Theron makes her a ruthless badass enough to give Max a run for his money. I watched this movie twice and it was only on the second viewing I truly appreciated how visually interesting and exciting the movie really is which, considering most of the movie features yellow-orange desert, is no mean feat 5. IT FOLLOWS "It doesn't think. It doesn't feel. It doesn't give up..." This film is equally an anachronistic throwback to 80s horror movies and a homage to the horror genre in general. A girl has sex with her new boyfriend and contracts a curse which causes a shape-shifting monster - only visible to her - to relentlessly, but slowly, follow her wherever she goes. Hinged on a simple premise, the movie efficiently sets up the 'rules' of how the curse operates and, in doing so, manages to create a genuinely original movie monster. The movie often has you focusing in the background of shots, wondering if that extra walking towards the characters could be the killer creature, adding to the overall sense of paranoia. It also earns extra marks for breaking some horror genre rules such a having the girl's friends almost immediately believe her and offer to assist with stopping the monster which is not seen in a lot of movies. Clever, stylish and with a killer 80's-synth score, this is a must-see for any horror fan. 4. KRAMPUS "You better watch out..." There are a number of Christmas horror movies out there; Few of them are as good as Krampus and none of them are nearly as fun. The film begins as a young boy's obnoxious extended family arrive for the Christmas period and quickly make his life hell. Shunning Christmas and throwing his torn-up Christmas list out of the window summons Krampus, the "shadow of Saint Nicholas" who punishes those lacking in the Christmas spirit. Most of the fun elements stem from Krampus's little helpers which include his twisted elves, a large snake-like jack-in-the-box creature and murderous gingerbread men which were my personal favourite of the bunch. The movie won't be to everybody's taste and if the sound of killer Christmas cookies doesn't float your boat, the movie will probably leave you unimpressed. However, if you enjoy your horror on the playful side, you will love it. It certainly ticked all my boxes and would make a darkly funny double-bill along with the director's Halloween anthology Trick R Treat. 3. INSIDE OUT "A major emotion picture..." Some would say Pixar's latest movies have been a little lacking in their usual energy and heart and have suffered critical acclaim due to their over-reliance on sequels, particularly in the cases of Cars 2 or Monsters University. Inside Out is a return-to-the-form for the studio and has the heart and originality we've come to expect from them. The film focuses on a young girl called Riley and the physical embodiments of the emotions in her head as she is forced to move cities by her parents. Animated movies are often made with both adults and children in mind so they can appeal to both but what is special about Inside Out is that, rather than simply throwing in the usual couple of double entendres, they have the made the movie in such a way that a parent watching it with their child will experience a genuinely different movie. Whilst a young child would mainly focus on the journey of Joy, Sadness, Fear etc around Riley's brain, an adult would pick up on the larger themes the movie tackles such as loss of childhood, why sadness is a necessary emotion and what can happen to a person when they are suffering with depression. The adult themes are not explicit enough to affect a child's enjoyment of the movie and there are certainly a lot of funny moments but, for me, they tipped the scales from Inside Out being a great Pixar movie to being an important movie and one of the best films this year. It is also the most tear-jerking Pixar movie since Toy Story 3 and should stand the test of time with with the best of them.. 2. STAR WARS EPISODE VII: THE FORCE AWAKENS "Every generation has a story..." What to say about Star Wars that hasn't already been said? Without doubt, The Force Awakens is the most anticipated movie of all time and so the bar was set as high as it possibly could be. After watching it, I am pleased to report I genuinely don't think the filmmakers could have done a better job. I have to admit, I am not the biggest Star Wars fan. However, even I got a genuine thrill from seeing Han and Chewie stepping back on the Millennium Falcon and, simply put, it felt like an experience. The drama, the comedy beats, the action; Everything has been delicately measured in the best possible way. The newcomers were great, the villains were three-dimensional and interesting (still something that isn't as common as it should be) and BB-8 holds his own against R2-D2 as new Droid on the block. Well worth a watch, even if you're not a Star Wars fanboy/girl. 1. JURASSIC WORLD "The park is open..." I'll start but admitting I've probably watched Jurassic Park more than any other movie so it's likely this was always going to be somewhere on my top ten list. When, in Jurassic World, characters enter a hotel room and pull open the curtains to reveal a fully-operational park, complete with original John Williams score, it was like nostalgia itself punching me in the face and I genuinely could not stop smiling. When talking about the nostalgia-factor playing a part in the film's financial success, it's all too easy to forget how well-made the movie really is and it works just as well as a standalone film. Pratt and Howard have a lot of real chemistry and as much of the movie falls on their shoulders as the scaly, CGI ones towering above them. That said, the final showdown scene at the end of the movie will be ingrained in my head as one of the best individual scenes of the year. It's a true, loving homage to the original Jurassic Park with enough new additions to make it interesting and it made me realise why I love the original so much. Well, that's it! Probably a bit of a controversial list as many of the above movies my top were only released in the last month or so and others naturally had to make way for them. Honourable mentions this year go out to The Duke Of Burgundy, Ant-Man, Spectre, Crimson Peak and The Visit which were all great and well worth a watch. Despite the multitude of blockbusters this year, there are still plenty of heavy-hitters on the way next year with the likes of Batman V Superman: Dawn Of Justice, Captain America: Civil War, X-Men: Apocalypse, Finding Dory, Star Trek Beyond and Suicide Squad to name a few also battling it out for your hard-earned cash. Don't let me down, Bats! Here's to a great year of film in 2016!

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BEST OF 2014

Yep, it’s that time again! Time for me to chip in my two cents about this past year’s movie releases. I had a much easier time coming up with this year’s list than I did for 2013’s releases and there were certainly some sure-fire 6/6 movies in the mix. There were a number of movies this year that I'd had tipped for the list before I’d even seen them but, for one reason or another, they failed to live up to my expectations. Instances of this include V/H/S: Viral (the first of the V/H/S series not to make my Top Ten) and The Babadook; neither of which were bad movies but left me disappointed to think what they may have been… That said, they had a lot of stiff competition and so, without further ado, here’s this year’s Top Ten.

10. SHARKNADO 2: THE SECOND ONE "Shark happens..." Yes, I know. Sharknado. One of the things I consider when making my yearly list is whether I would be happy to watch the movie again. For me there are very few recent films as instantly re-watchable as Sharknado 2. The acting is atrocious, the jokes are laughable in the wrong way and the CGI effects are somehow worse than the first in the series. However, it's impossible not to fall in love with a movie that includes flaming sharks bouncing down stairwells, a shark used as a baseball and - even more improbable - Tara Reid as a best-selling author. Also, tornadoes made of sharks... It's a riot of a movie and as long as they keep making them, I'll keep watching them. Some good movies lost out on the tenth place position for Sharknado 2 and I stand by that decision. Don't judge me...

9, GODZILLA "The king will rise..." I understand there is a lot to dislike about the Godzilla reboot. Bryan Cranston is barely in the movie despite all marketing suggesting otherwise, Elizabeth Olsen is totally underused as the lead's one-note wife and I found it extremely difficult to build a connection with any of the human characters throughout the movie. However, the movie is called Godzilla and, whilst he may not have enough screen-time for some, every single frame the god lizard himself is shown is absolute gold. Like the later additions to the Godzilla franchise, the big bad is not 'Zilla himself but a new set of skyscraper-sized kaiju named MUTO. The inevitable battle scenes between Godzilla and the MUTO are well worth the cinema ticket alone, particularly when the former gets his radioactive-breath on... So, in spite of its faults, I would still watch this movie over the 1998 atrocity any day!

8. THE LEGO MOVIE "Everything is awesome..." There are some pretty dark movies on this year's list. This is not one of them. Very few people high high hopes for the Lego Movie which is one reason why it managed to make such a huge impact upon its release. Not only is it insanely fun and extremely witty, it delivers strong messages about the dangers of conformity whilst avoiding becoming a feature-length toy advertisement. As well as having a stellar plot and a great voice cast, it is also one of the funniest films of the year. The character of Lego Batman manages to steal the show but spaceship-obsessed Benny (the 80's spaceman) more than earns his place as fan favourite. Add to the mix an insanely catchy ear-worm in the form of 'Everything is Awesome' and there was no way this wasn't going to be on my final list.

7. X-MEN: DAYS OF FUTURE PAST "His past. Our future..." Yep, another superhero movie... "X Men 7: First Class 2 - Return of The Wolverine 3" is a ballsy epic combining almost every character in the X-Men cinematic universe and even finding time to introduce new mutants to the mix. Wolverine is sent back in time from an apocalyptic future to help the younger versions of Professor X and Magneto stop the creation of mutant-killing robots. It says a lot about the movie that, despite the sheer amount of plot and usual timey-wimey plot-holes, it still manages to be totally comprehensible and a lot of fun to boot. It's not all larks and 80's-style Hawaiian shirts, however. In the initial timeline we're introduced to, a lot of beloved X-Men including Storm and Iceman are brutally murdered by the shape-shifting robots which is a very brave move in itself and quickly establishes how high the stakes are. One of the highlights of the overall movie is the newly introduced speedy mutant Quicksilver who, in an incredible scene mid-way through the film, manages to take out an entire room of police officers before Wolverine manages to 'SNIKT' his blades out. The ending is also an extremely ballsy scene and brings a much-needed freshness to the X-Men franchise that has made me excited for future installments.

6. GONE GIRL "You don't know what you've got til it's..." Gone Girl is the perfect example of the creed 'the less you know beforehand, the better'. I knew very little of the plot before watching the movie and came out of it thinking it was an extremely well-executed thriller. This is mainly in part to Ben Affleck in co-lead but, I would argue, the movie is carried by the breakout role of Rosamund Pike who plays the titular "girl who is gone". The plot hinges on what you as an audience member believe has happened to Pike's character and, throughout the movie, I found myself flip-flopping between which characters I believed. Whilst the film does take a fairly large u-turn around the half-way point, this only created less certainty about where the movie was headed. Not a great date movie but a more than worthy contender for my Top Ten.

5. CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER "In heroes we trust..." There were a number of superhero blockbusters in 2014 but few were as slick as the second Captain America movie. There are some huge rug-pulls in this 60's inspired conspiracy thriller that I won't spoil here but no other Marvel release has had such a franchise-changing effect. In fact, there is so much going on in this movie that, by the end of it, you forget how subtle Cap's overall change is from Tony Stark's straight-laced all-American punching-bag to bad-ass authority-questioning warrior. Darker sequels are certainly a cliche but this one works extremely well in its tone and really puts its characters through their paces emotionally before the end credits. Like last year's Thor, it managed to take one of my lesser loved Marvel heroes and turned him one of the more interesting characters in the MCU. Roll on, Age of Ultron!

4. INSIDE LLEWYN DAVIS "Fair thee well..." Inside Llewyn Davis is a typically Cohen-y snapshot in time. Where 'O Brother, Where Art Thou' was essentially an oddball version of The Odyssey with bluegrass music, this movie has a very similar premise but uses folk music as its muse. The titular character, played excellently by Oscar Issac, is a loser folk singer who sleeps on a different couch every night and accidentally ends up travelling with his friend's cat. Llewyn Davis himself is actually quite a difficult character to like and is in a continued state of ennui. However, you cannot help but feel something for him - even if it is a form of pity - and the decision not to reveal too much about why he acts and feels the way he does is a clever one. We don't need to know. This is simply a snapshot in the life of a man that has one hell of a soundtrack.

3. INTERSTELLAR "Mankind was born on Earth. It was never meant to die here..." People say that they don't make sci-fi "classics" like they used to. Some would argue that Interstellar is proof this isn't the case. This tale, which admittedly owes a lot to 2001: A Space Odyssey (among others), focuses on a former astronaut turned corn-farmer after the food sources on Earth are depleted. When a wormhole appears in space, he is taken to the farthest reaches of space in order in an attempt to save humanity. For an epic space story that deals with different dimensions and complex theories such as space-time, it's firmly grounded in the idea of family and is very much the story about the astronaut and his daughter on Earth who he leaves behind. For some reason, Interstellar has had a bit of a 'backlash' since it's release but I genuinely think people will look fondly upon this movie and see no reason it won't be watched as a double-bill alongside 2001 in years to come.

2. UNDER THE SKIN In a year full of interesting, thought-provoking sci-fi flicks, Under The Skin manages to stand out from the rest with an extremely bleak tale of a shape-shifting alien scout - played by Scarlett Johansson - roaming Glasgow in a white van to 'harvest' humans. The filmmakers deliberately avoid answering the bigger questions (what exactly is the alien's role? what happens to the humans after they are harvested?) and instead allow the movie to focus on Johansson's alien herself who is, at least initially, utterly indifferent to humanity. She brings a remarkable coldness to the character which, particularly during a scene set on a beach, is as convincing as it is shocking... The sound editing and score of the movie are fantastic; unsettling and reminiscent of the background hum of Eraserhead. Saying more about the film would likely spoil the experience but, in my opinion, it's one of the smartest and most haunting sci-fi movies of recent years.

1. OCULUS "You see what it wants you to see..." Empire Magazine suggested that The Babadook was “the smartest horror movie in years” - a brave statement to make in the very same year that Oculus was released. Oculus focuses on two twenty-something siblings who stage a sit-in with a haunted mirror they believe was behind the murder of their mother when they were children. The tension builds between the siblings, one of which has been in therapy for years and no longer believes the mirror is haunted. The shining light of the movie is Karen Gillan whose character is a breath of fresh air in a genre saturated with vulnerable teens. Nothing like the 'scream queen' you might imagine, Gillan’s lead is savvy and confident and is fully aware of the history and power of the mirror even before the movie begins. She even sets up various fail-safes to keep themselves sane and to destroy the mirror when things start to get a little strange. All of this means it’s even more distressing for the audience when, one by one, the fail-safes start to… fail. It takes its cues from many haunted-mirror movies before it but it still manages to be much better than the sum of its parts. A solid horror film and definitely my personal film of the year.

So, there you go! This year's honorary mentions go to Guardians Of The Galaxy, Locke, The Wolf of Wall Street, Dawn Of The Planet Of The Apes and Nightcrawler; all of which were great movies but not as good as... Sharknado 2? I'm not changing the list, OK?! Anyway, this coming year is the "Summer of Death" during which such billion-dollar blockbusters such as Jurassic World, Spectre, Terminator: Genisys, Ant-Man, Furious 7, Avengers: Age of Ultron, Mad Max: Fury Road, The Fantastic Four reboot and, um, Fifty Shades of Grey (to name but a few) could potentially bankrupt the whole of the world. Or something. I haven't done the figures. In any case, I'm very excited for the big releases this year so roll on 2015!

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BEST OF 2013

This time last year I was commending 2012 as “a fantastic year for film” and I always knew it would be difficult to follow a twelve-month period with both billion-dollar successes such as The Avengers and daring, critically-acclaimed hits such as The Artist in its mix. Whilst 2013 has certainly had its share of blockbusters, I think it speaks volumes that I found it very hard to find ten movies that I would have honestly given a 6/6 rating and that three of my top-ten are sequels. Whilst the past year may not have been saturated with incredible movies (there’s always the 2015 “summer of death” to look forward to) there were definitely some outstanding releases well worth a mention. So here it is; my personal top-ten of 2013! 

10. Escape From Tomorrow

“Bad things happen everywhere. Especially here…”

This is, without a doubt, the most unusual and daring entry on the list this year. Whilst this dark fantasy-horror may not be to everybody’s taste, the fact that it was filmed in secret in Disney World (and incredibly not shut down by the Disney company upon its release) and has quickly managed to gain a cult following is definitely something to be praised. The movie follows a man who, on the day he takes his family to the “Happiest Place on Earth”, is told out he’s been made redundant at his job. Skip forward to trippy experiences on the ‘It’s A Small World’ ride, secret laboratories under Epcot, Disney princesses becoming prostitutes at night and a park-wide outbreak of “Cat Flu”… Has to be seen to be believed.

9. Les Miserables

“Fight. Dream. Hope. Love…”

Les Mis is one of those odd movies that is seemingly flavour-of-the-month when it’s released but has a bit of a public backlash afterwards. For sheer scale and drama alone, Les Mis deserves a place on this list. People have criticised the singing – both the vocal talent and the sheer amount – but I really enjoyed it at the time and haven’t changed my opinion since. Some of the actors such as Jackman and Crowe put in some of the best performances of their careers and it’s a powerful piece of cinema even if you’re not a fan of the genre itself.

 8. Stoker

“Innocence ends…”

This drama-thriller was the English movie debut for Chan-wook Park of Oldboy fame and, whilst much a lot more ‘subtle’ than some of his other movies, Stoker retains the tension and dark family-tension throughout. The movie focuses on young India Stoker and her mother Evelyn whose already strained relationship is pushed to the limits when the family patriarch dies and India’s previously-unknown uncle Charles quickly moves into the household. This is a movie that, whilst incredibly tense and well-directed, relies on the performances of its leads and it is Mia Wasikowska’s acting chops that makes the movie so completely watchable. 

7. Pacific Rim

“Go big or go extinct…”

Ever since I heard the premise of this movie (giant aliens vs giant robots) and discovered it was being directed by Guillermo del Toro, I was excited to see it. Whilst it didn’t quite live up to my very high expectations, it was still a hell of a lot of fun and visually stunning. I personally feel some of the dialogue was a little cheesy and a lot of the secondary characters were one-dimensional but it says a lot about the movie as a whole that my issues didn’t really affect how much I ultimately enjoyed it. Del Toro has an incredible eye for detail and colour which is utilised to the max and any movie that has such great sequences such as the night fights between the Jaegers and the kaiju and the beautiful 3D underwater battles is worthy of a place in my top-ten. 

6. Thor: The Dark World

Thor was never my favourite of the Marvel superheroes and probably my least-favourite of the ‘phase one’ movies. However, The Dark World upped the ante and absolutely nailed the mix of humour and drama that, in my opinion, outweighed that of Iron Man 3. Whilst it suffers from some of the same issues as a lot of recent blockbusters (an arguably pointless ‘McGuffin’ that doesn’t get utilised; token destruction-of-a-major-city) the strong third act is what makes the movie and I feel this is a rarity in these sort of movies. The scenes of the hammer Mjölnir continuously chasing after Thor as he keeps disappearing through portals across London is sheer brilliance and shows that Marvel Studios have no shortage of great ideas and humour. 

5. V/H/S 2

“Who’s tracking you?...”

The first V/H/S movie was an addition in last year’s top-ten list and I was pleased to discover I enjoyed the sequel just as much. Whilst a couple of the segments of this found-footage horror anthology – including a POV short from a go-pro camera attached to a zombie’s head - were perhaps a little less exciting and fresh than the ones in the first installment, it also includes one of the best shorts I’ve ever seen which, alone, makes V/H/S 2 well worth a mention. This short, named “Safe Haven”, follows a group of Indonesian reporters who have decided to do a piece on a local cult and its leader. Once the reporters meet the cult leader, things inevitably start to go horribly wrong... It’s best to say as little as possible about the actual outcome but the word ‘carnage’ sum it up nicely and what it lacks in subtlety it more than makes up for in gore and sheer insanity. 

4. Gravity

“Don’t let go…”

Being arguably the most talked-about movie of the year, there isn’t much I can say about Gravity that hasn’t already been said. Much like Pacific Rim, I felt that the sheer premise and expectation of the movie was always going to leave the end-result slightly disappointing. I also felt that its uneasy dialogue did let it down in places. That said, Gravity is a stand-alone movie that is neither a reboot or adaptation of pre-existing material and utilised brand new filming techniques and equipment to reproduce the weightlessness of space and for this it should massively applauded. This would be remarkable alone even if the visuals throughout the whole movie weren’t so incredible and it’s been enough to make people have faith in not only 3D but the cinema experience once again. As long as you’re able to suspend your disbelief enough to get past the ‘how-much-bad-stuff-can-happen-to-one- person factor’, it is still almost objectively one of the most impressive movies of the year. 

3. Man of Steel

How do you go about re-telling an origin story that is one of the most well-known in the world? It’s a question that a lot of people from both Marvel and DC Studios have had to face before but Superman is SUPERMAN and, therefore, the first superhero… I was never personally a massive fan of the previous Superman film series (maybe a slightly controversial opinion) and it was great to finally see a movie worthy of Supe’s name. I know a lot of people had an issue with the smashy/punchy ending but I believe if you wish for a Superman without a lot of punching you basically get Superman Returns and nobody wants another Superman Returns. I feel they threw enough different elements at the character to make him interesting again and I’m not quite at the level where I’m bored at watching cities be destroyed by “gods” in stunning 3D. Add to that a powerful villain that has more than one dimension and is played with true intensity by Michael Shannon, a welcome lack of Clark Kent “goofing around” and a truly interesting plot and it becomes the blockbuster the character deserves. 

2. The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

“Beyond darkness, beyond desolation, lies the greatest danger of all…”

The original Hobbit movie got a bit of stick for lack of real peril and tension for the characters and dwarven songs about washing dishes. Any concerns that this series was far removed from the Lord of the Rings movies have been washed away by this sequel that is both extremely fun and reminiscent of the earlier movies. Throw-backs to the Prancing Pony pub, more uses of the One Ring and a cameo from the LotR Big Bad himself are welcome and make you glad to be back in this universe that now seems very familiar. I now struggle to think of anybody else but Freeman that could tackle Bilbo’s role and his long-anticipated face-off with Smaug the dragon is well worth the wait. Whilst the ending feels extremely abrupt I guess it’s to be expected. My only real criticism of the movie is that I feel it could have resolved some of the more minor storylines before moving on to the final in the trilogy. 

1.Evil Dead

“Fear what you will become…”

I’ll start off with the obvious; I really enjoyed the Evil Dead remake. The best bit about this fact is that I really wasn’t expecting to. I’m a fan of the original series – particularly Evil Dead 2 – and felt a remake/reboot was unnecessary at best. Whilst the new Evil Dead is certainly not a perfect movie, the director and producers clearly have a love of the original movies and make sure all the right beats are there. The cabin, the teenagers, the tracking shots, the book, the chainsaw (OK, partially replaced with an electric knife)… It’s both a homage and an stand-alone addition to the series. Jane Levy is great in the lead role but the award for unsung-hero is the Shaggy-esque Eric who accidentally unleashes the evil from the cursed book but also does more than most of the characters to try to rectify the pretty gruesome situation. It’s Eric himself that mutters my favourite line in the movie: “Nothing's fine! I don't know if you noticed this but everything's been getting worse EVERY second.” In one line, the admittedly simple premise and overall tone of Evil Dead is summed up beautifully. 

OK, that’s it! It’s a little more detailed than usual but for lack of regular FOUROUTOFFIVE film reviews, I thought I’d do a bit more of a write-up. Honorary mentions this year go to Prisoners, You’re Next, Star Trek Into Darkness, The World’s End and Insidious: Chapter 2. All those movies were close contenders but just missed out. Roll on 2014!

[threeoutoffive]

OLYMPUS HAS FALLEN

"When our flag falls our nation will rise..."

Lots more fun than I'd imagined. A tongue-in-cheek actioner that's surprisingly grizzly in places, entertaining and high octane throughout.

5/6

[threeoutoffive]

STAR TREK INTO DARKNESS

"In our darkest hour, when our leaders have fallen, a hero will rise..."

Even better than the first, this starts on a high and only gets better. Quinto is great but Cumberbatch's villain steals the show.

5/6

[threeoutoffive]

DEAD MAN DOWN

"Blood demands blood..."

Well-made, if not totally original, espionage thriller. The underlying chemistry between Farrell and Rapace made it stand out.

3/6

[threeoutoffive]

IRON MAN 3

"Unleash the power behind the armor..."

Disappointing sequel that failed to do the Marvel Universe justice. Villains were way too powerful and too many suits. A lesser addition to the series.

3/6

[threeoutoffive]

KILLER JOE

"Murder never tasted so good..."

Harrowing thriller with moments of dark humour amidst the high tension. Great performances by McConaughey and Temple.

5/6

[threeoutoffive]

THE ABC'S OF DEATH

"26 directors. 26 ways to die..."

It didn't live up to my expectations and not as fun as I'd hoped. The handful of really good segments were let down by one or two very offensive ones.

3/6

[threeoutoffive]

THE PLACE BEYOND THE PINES

"If you ride like lightning, you're going to crash like thunder..."

A character study of how people are shaped by errors of the past. Gosling was great but I felt Cooper was less necessary.

3/6

[threeoutoffive]

EVIL DEAD

"The most terrifying film you will ever experience..."

Intense, insidious, well made horror remake that's more gory and horrific than its namesake and different enough to feel fresh.

5/6

[threeoutoffive]

A FANTASTIC FEAR OF EVERYTHING

"His demons are taking over..."

Bunny and the Bull-esque comedy that tries harder to be quirky than to create a good story or likable characters.

1/6

[threeoutoffive]

OBLIVION

 "Earth is a memory worth fighting for..."

Moon done by Michael Bay. Much better than expected. Whist a lot of plot points are brushed over it still manages to be interesting and visually great.

4/6

[threeoutoffive]

21 Grams

"How much does life weigh?.."

Superbly acted drama but its fragmented style took some getting used to. Watts's performance was definitely a highlight. Good overall story.

4/6