☁️

/cloud_archive.

[thundercatssaynotoskeletonhats]

if there is one thing i pride myself with, it would be my endless imagination.

i love daydreaming. sometimes i do it so often, i forget reality is real for a moment and that scares me sometimes but excites me nonetheless.

its an exciting thing. it takes you places you wish to be and if you are good enough, it even mimics emotions you would feel at that precise moment.

it is a good thing.

—until the lack of reality catches up with you and from then on, daydreaming isn't enough anymore. You became so in love with the version of life in your head you didn't realize it was slowly eating your heart too. And the more in love you were with that ideal, the more it killed you inside.

and i’m tired of feeling like this..this joy of what life could be or maybe is in another dimension closely followed with the wave of exhaustion and utter disappointment.

is this my fault? is this a form of punishment? i dont know.

all i do know is that it kills me and i dont know how much longer i can do this for.

“its the oldest story; i am surrounded by a sea of people and yet, i have never felt more lonely. more misunderstood.

but, i will power through. I know it.”

—me about a month ago.

will i though?

i dont know.

all i know is..life is bullshit.

and i dont know if i am able to accept that.

—my lonely ass at 1:34am (Saturday 16th Febuary, 2019)

[thundercatssaynotoskeletonhats]

lost&found {{vol.1}}

“She forced a smile and with every second the smile lasted, a thousand knives were stabbed in her already shattered heart-- she knew his forever was shorter than hers.”

----Aug.11,2016 // uneditted

[thundercatssaynotoskeletonhats]

.emotions exhaust me.

-a.m.

[thundercatssaynotoskeletonhats]

i don’t know much about love, it’s true.

—but trust me when i say; no matter where you are and what you are doing, i know we are meant to be together.

[thundercatssaynotoskeletonhats]

to nobody in particular,

i hope to find happiness some time soon.

-a.m.

[affectin]

[lonelysoul-inlight]

“The thing is, i say im strong that im over you. And im. I really am. But the problem is, if you say ‘hi, im here.’ I would fall for you all over again.”

—

[lonelysoul-inlight]

“If i confess, would you runaway with me?”

—

[lonelysoul-inlight]

“Why do i still see you in my future?”

—

[lonelysoul-inlight]

“Dear you, I don’t know how long it has been since we were us. I dont even want to know because numbers are just facts. Something that is exact, logical..something that anyone could easily understand with some time and effort put into it. My love, however, isnt. I didn’t understand why after all the time and effort I’m still an open wound. I don’t understand why after everything you have done, i still wanna crawl back to you. People say, nothing heels a broken heart as time does, so why after all this time my heart still bleeds for you? When i see you, all i wanna do is hug you so tight so i would never let you go again. But that’s just it isn’t it? I wouldn’t let go but you would. I used to be your cheerleader but now your number one fan in your eyes is only her. -a.m.”

—