ticktockdearie

fanfiction blog of @commander-rutherford-vakarian

[ticktockdearie]

Tonight is a great reminder that American democracy isn't dead yet. It still needs our help, but we just proved we CAN fight. Don't ever roll over for Republican pricks.

[ticktockdearie]

A show could be legitimately 30 years old and you still log on every day to the most dog shit takes on it you've ever seen

[ticktockdearie]

4 year old: can me and [2 year old brother] pretend we're twins?

Me: aww, sure you can!

4 year old: and that we STEAL MONEY.

Me: um...okay.

[ticktockdearie]

Just think about when I, post nuptials, found out my husband was a Homestuck fan and it legitimately took some time to process

[ticktockdearie]

Hey Dolly Parton, I have a couple quick questions about the book you just sent to my son.

[ticktockdearie]

My 4 year old was listening to the Yoto Daily podcast today and they did a quiz. They asked who painted the Mona Lisa and the options were Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and Raphael. I could just see the little gears turning in his head like "you're telling me... a Ninja Turtle painted this?"

[ticktockdearie]

4 year old: I'm my own Ninja Turtle! Her name is TC and she has a pink mask and she loves skate parties and she has an electric sword!

Me: omg... Baby's first OC.🥹

[ticktockdearie]

I showed my kid the original Ninja Turtles show, which I know absolutely nothing about.

Then Splinter started talking to me with Duncan's voice and I had an aneurysm.

[shortgaything]

QUICK. RB THIS WITH THE FIRST SONG LYRIC THAT COMES TO YOUR HEAD WHEN YOU SEE THIS POST. THAT IS AN ORDER

[toastyglow]

the world's most decent little princess

[manrippedapartbydogs]

Thank you Ken! Very cool.

[ticktockdearie]

"Where is Ken now?"

He... He hosts Jeopardy...

[dasenergi]

Mister Rogers

[therobotmonster]

Dang, I gotta start feelin’ better about myself.

[princebuffovt]

[ticktockdearie]

If there's a chapter in my kids' history book titled "The Second American Civil War" and the first paragraph starts with "On September 10, 2025, Charlie Kirk..." I'm gonna be so fucking pissed

[ticktockdearie]

I'm sorry but this wording????

[ticktockdearie]

At the Box Lunch store at the mall, looking at the Marvel stuff

4 year old: Was he in the water too long?

Husband: What?

4 year old: Because he's Deadpool.

[ticktockdearie]

I was talking to my mom about my first watch of ER and in the middle I made an offhand comment to my kid about Elmo and my husband thought I was still talking about ER and he got very confused

Husband: "Elmo needs to put in a stint!"