Monterey Bay Aquarium
tannertan36
oozey mess
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Kiana Khansmith
#extradirty
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hello vonnie
Not today Justin
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taylor price
Phantogram Three
occasionally subtle
izzy's playlists!
Noah Kahan
Love Begins
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@tim-drake-is-a-mood
Tim: Look Dick, it says "gullible" on the ceiling.
Dick: Nice try, Timmy. I'm not falling for that one a fifth time.
Tim: I'm not kidding, Dick.
Dick: And I'm not looking.
Damian, walking into the room, looking up: Drake, why does it say "gullible" on the ceiling?
Dick, looking up: Really? Wherâ oh, you bastards!
Tim and Damian: *high five*
Dick: WAIT B! PLEASE DON'T LOOK AT MY LAPTOP!
Bruce: Why?
Dick: I'm... an adult. And I do... adult things on there...
Bruce: This is a buzzfeed quiz?
Dick, Forcefully shutting laptop: WHICH DISNEY PRINCESS I AM IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!
there is no way jason and tim haven't gotten bored during patrol and decided to switch places for a bit. like the amount they must banter and joke about how tim stole robin so he's coming for red hood next, and that jason's gonna steal red robin as revenge for taking robin from him; there has to be an occasion where during a slow night they're both bored and in funny moods so they just switch costumes behind an air conditioning unit without telling anyone for a laugh.
jason shows up to red robin's rendezvous with nightwing, batman and robin clearly about to tear through tim's suit. dick and damian stare at him in the utmost bafflement until bruce opens his mouth to ask what the fuck and dick cuts him off with a 'hoooold on b, i kinda wanna see what happens when he tries to use those bo-staffs.'
they end up just quietly accepting it and jason spends the next three hours doing the MOST dramatic tim impressions he can, including answering literally everything with 'uhm, actually âď¸đ¤' vibes and every five minutes going in a very high pitched voice 'man, jason todd sure was my hero back when he was robin. i wish i had been good enough to fill his shoes but alas, i am just a pathetic little rich boy with no skills other than being a potential peeping-tom'. damian laughs. every time. there also comes a point where they all get into a fight with some criminals and jason has to bust out the bo-staffs except he was never trained with them so he doesn't know the techniques, and it ends up with dick sat on top of a billboard calling out point scores as jason runs around holding one of the staffs like fuckin steve harrington with his nail-bat just whacking guys over the head with it as if he's playing fuckin' goon-golf.
meanwhile tim is over in crime alley surrounded by jason's subordinates who ABSOLUTELY fuckin' know this is red robin wearing their bosses suit because it is DROWNING him and they've seen the two hang out enough to catch onto tim's speech style, except they are absolutely NOT going to be interfering or asking why because red robin is wearing a bomb-helmet and is clearly ENTIERLY too happy to be in a situation where it is socially acceptable for him to be using guns and threatening to kill people and jason's goons do NOT want to get involved. the rest of the bats finally end up in crime alley and they find 'red hood' sat on a chair in the middle of a street he's blocked off via death threats overseeing a human version of chess that he's playing against black mask (who does not seem to realise this isn't jason) complete with a chalk chess board drawn on the road and all of jason's subordinates resignedly standing in separate squares with pieces of paper stuck to their heads declaring what kind of piece they're supposed to be. jason and dick walk onto the street just in time to watch tim declare 'knight to E5!' and the guy with 'knight' pinned to his forehead clocks his real boss entering the scene dressed as red robin, sighs bitterly at him, drags his feet over to where black mask's 'queen' goon is staring at the floor forlornly, says 'sorry matthew,' and then proceeds to sock him in the face so hard the guy goes down in one hit.
Robin!Tim: *gets in the second Batmobile*
Bart: You only have a learner's permit.
Kon: Yeah, don't you need an adult in the car?
Dick, inside the trunk: LET ME OUT OF HERE!
Bruce: how was your day at school
Jason: some kid at school called me a homo I thought it meant homeless
Bruce:
Jason: I replied with no shit
Bruce: honey, no
So what was the idea Firebird approached SkullKitten about? Well. It had to do with Firebird's barely-begun and poorly-planned batgirlsAU over on ao3. There was a whole thing, she was going to pair it with a bad things happen bingo card she got, and the psych idea was for a bingo space FAR down the interconnected timeline. Despite how many fics were in between where Fire left off and where she and SK were planning the Better psych fic, they immediately began writing.
All.
Semester.
Long.
They wrote and zoomed and edited and rewrote. Characters took shape. The BBEG became "Bubbles" and then Ben. The BBEG's bf became "Tie Guy" and then Ty. The other members of the Owl court (someday soon we'll explain our vision of it, pinkie promise) went from being numbered after their positions to having names and personalities. For better or worse.
We uh. We revised and rewrote and partially wrote this fic so many times. We got burnt out and it remains unfinished but there are so many hilarious and chilling moments we desperately want to share. Especially because well... that fic is no longer canon to our timeline. Over the summer we began playing around with a change in the timeline and the villains and heroes began actually getting along. And well. It was so beautiful. We also got to see more of Ben and Tys relationship and guys we cant do what we were gonna. Neither of us can handle it. Nor can Ty. Ben can but his opinion is irrelevant and we have thus made a manual override so that our OG AU is now the Dark AU.
So welcome to the Dark AU! Remember folks its all uphill from here đ
Key Things About Dark AU
Original trajectory of the sisters/bthb au (we'll talk you through how we planned to fill out the card in another post we'll link here)
Its very batfam vs the court of Owls (our version), with a slow build towards the realization that the forces in play all along were the court
The Robins are: Rebecca Mary Grayson, First Robin, now Nightwing. Jade Beatrice Todd, Second Robin, now Red Hood. Emily Janet Drake, Third Robin now Red Robin. Daima Al Ghul Wayne, Fourth Robin.
Babs was Batgirl, now Oracle. We love Steph, Cass and Duke so much, but they do not exist here. Fire had a very convoluted (it made sense to her) way of dividing the 25 prompts among the 4 Robins equally and since we have added and changed so much since, and moved away from comic accuracy quite a lot, we've kept it to our Batman, 4 Robins, and Oracle
The court of Owls is essentially a micronation within the USA residing in Gotham. We'll explain in more detail, but it has 5+1 Court Members (we usually just type cm) who are ranked 1-6. (6 bless their heart is a replacement for if someone dies while serving their term).
Assume anything you read is a spoiler. Spoiler for what? Dunno. But its probably a spoiler for smt.
Oh magic exists. We have a very intricate system. There will be PowerPoints.
Alfred is Fae.
So over a year ago now, Firebird, a humble batman fanfic writer, approached SkullKitten with a fic idea she was working on inspired by her â¨ď¸psychology classâ¨ď¸.SK, after listening for several minutes, calmly explained why it Would Not Work and asked to make it Better.
Um. She did. And now we have OCs based on our not-comic-accurate-but-very-intricate version of the Court of Owls. OCs which are living rent free and as yet have gone nowhere and since it will take quite a long time to organize the brain rot into post-able fics, we thought we would introduce these OCs and our Batfam here on Tumblr bc they are just the sort of unhinged, queer, morally questionable, traumatized little beans we all seem to love on this site.
Oh. And there are AUs. Of this AU. Many. We're going to introduce things slowly and grouped by AU and keep a post with a running tab of which of our sub-blogs that we make correspond to which version of a character, with the hope that the infection will take hold and soon you'll know who's who too. Or at least be a step ahead of Cardan.
Feel free to ask questions we know its complicated and these goddamn characters thrive on attention so. If you're a writer you get it.
Signing off,
Firebird and SkullKitten
âHe would not fucking say thatâ is a Schrodingerâs phrase when it comes to Batman. There is probably Batman run where he would say that. There is also probably a run where Batman would kill the other Batman for saying that.
Yknow how lions will sometimes pretend that their cubs' biting hurts and stuff as a form of encouragement
Imagine that but like
Robin!Dick: *bap*
Bruce: *dramatically throws himself into a shelf*
a toddler who was being saved by the red hood called him "mama" once and now crime alley kids will refer to him as mama all. the. time.
Bruce: Alright, we got the family holiday party coming up and we need to go over some ground rules to make sure we don't have a repeat of last year.
Stephanie: Is it gonna be in the back room of the Clock Tower again?
Bruce: No, it's not. Apparently, the city doesn't enjoy holes punched in the wall.
Jason: Hey, that punch was meant for Tim.
Tim: You're a mean drunk, Jason.
Bruce: Rule number one: adults get two drink tickets. When they're gone, that's it.
Jason: Uh...
Damian: No, Jason, you cannot use Cassandra's drink tickets.
Jason: Damn.
Bruce: And no bringing your own supply. I will be checking water bottles.
Dick: But do bring your gelt 'cause I'm bringing my dreidel again and it's on.
Duke: I'm not risking my chocolate again. No way.
Harper: Two drink max and kids' games? This should be fun.
Bruce: Rule number two: no coupling up and sneaking off.
Jason, glancing at Dick and Barbara: Uh-huh.
Barbara: Oh my gosh, guys, how many times are we gonna talk about this?
Bruce: Think of the shame and humiliation. Think of the awkwardness the next day when you run into the person youâ
Barbara: We get it, jeez.
Bruce: Alright, rule number three: for the White Elephant, get creative. I don't know if you conspired last year but every gift was a weapon. You literally just exchanged weapons.
Cass: That really was epic.
Damian: Best White Elephant ever.
Duke: So where is the party gonna be this year?
Bruce: Right here in the Manor. That way we can get a deep clean in too.
Everyone: *starts complaining*
Dick, singing to Barbara: Last time loop, I gave you my heart.
Dick: The very next day, I gave you my heart.
Jason: wow demon brat, the replacement was right about you.
Damian: ?
Jason: well earlier we were talking and he said the reason you're so aggressive is because you lack battle sense and never have a decent plan apart from 'stab and hope for the best'
Damian:
Damian: oh, Drake said that did he? well we'll see if he still thinks that after i've carefully destroyed his entire LIFE.
Dick and Jason, watching Damian angrily storm away to plot:
Dick to Jason: why the everloving FUCK would you do that?! Tim didn't say shit, and they JUST started getting along.
Jason: exactly, dipshit. do you even understand how terrifying it is when those two work together? do you really want the real 'worlds greatest detective' and B's demon brat 'blood son' to team up against everyone else? do you really want the two youngest to focus their sights on the two oldest? do you really want that, dickface!?
Dick:
Jason: remember last year, when they started bonding over that human trafficking case B paired them up on? they declared themselves 'besties' and almost took over half of Bludhaven before i paid Alfred to pit them against each other during monopoly
Dick:
Dick: oh my god you're right. they'll turn against us and we'll be dead by the end of the week.
Jason: exactly. it's our job as their elder brothers to make sure they don't get too chummy.
Dick: ...just don't tell Bruce.
Dick is used to doing everything on the move, so he doesn't even notice that his behavior is not "normal".
When his mom was teaching him history, he was hanging upside down from the trapeze, trying to do a new routine.
When his dad was teaching him math, he was calculating the angles of his jumps and spins in the air.
Language? He practiced a new language on the trapeze with his parents, associating new words with the routines. If he made a mistake (either with routine or with language), they would start over so he could learn correctly.
He likes to read, but not while sitting. He usually reads while hanging upside down or swinging.
When Bruce receives the same message from his teachers for the fifth time in a row, saying that his son ward is "brilliant, a genius, but lazy", Bruce doesn't understand, since Dick always has his schoolwork done. How could he be lazy?
That is until he discovers that nine-year-old Dick is doing his homework while doing six other things at once, including practicing jumping routines, learning a new language and also planning a strategy to contain the Penguin.
Bruce: Chum, you have ADHD.
Dick: Why do you think that? *he says while hanging from the chandelier, with a math book in one hand and a device he just built that only he knows what it does in the other hand, until a second ago singing a song in a language Bruce didn't even know the little boy could speak*
nobody will ever speak ill of my son ever again he volunteers at the HOSPITAL bless him
also one step closer to dr damian wayne bc i think thereâs beautiful writing in raâs going from a doctor to an assassin raising his grandchild to be an assassin but damian wants to be a healer đ
put that boy in med school
I understand the appeal of writer!Jason Todd while heâs the Redhood but I donât think YOU understand the appeal of writer!Jason while heâs a pre-teen Robin. That young man writes a field report like itâs a mystery novel, and like what is Bruce even supposed to say âHey, chum⌠while the pacing of the report was very intriguing, I need you to be LESS detailed about the color of the suspects âemerald green orbs.ââ No, he wonât!! because Jason may be a bit annoying but itâs a vast improvement from Dick âWhat happens with the titans is between me, god, and the emergency room on 34th ave.â Grayson who used to just write âfixed it :)â on cases he completed.
