闪电 @tlouxlei-blog - Tumblr Blog

Posts

housedemarr

#{ soldier }#{ Is this too spicy to reblog bc I love this and want to share it }

tlouxlei-blog

Lost In Translation | J&LS

tloujackson-deactivated20160306

All Jackson knew of love was what he had been told. He witnessed it in his parents but he had never experienced it himself. He had friends that had been in love and had tried to tell the doctor what love was like but he would never know what it was until he experienced it himself. Or so he was told. Jackson had also seen the damage love had done to some people. Some patients had come in with injuries related to broken hearts or lost love. Some had even been hurt by the ones they loved. Jackson wasn’t sure if he even wanted to feel love. He knew he could, he just didn’t know how.

However, things were different when it came to the older male. With Lei Jackson felt complete. He felt happy. He felt like his past meant nothing as long as they were together. And if that was love then so be it. He would gladly welcome love into his life if it meant he could forget the trauma of his past and move on. His friends had told him they had noticed a change in him after meeting the soldier. They said it was a good thing. So he accepted it. Their love was new and it was still blossoming. Neither male knew what to do or how to act.

As soon as Lei sighed Jackson turned his head to look at him. He listened as the other male spoke. His heart warmed up and a smile spread across his lips. He looked down towards the ground below as he continued to listen. His legs swung back and forth as they dangled over the edge. When Lei had finished Jackson waited a few seconds before turning his head to smile once again at the one who made his heart flutter. He wrote something down on his notepad and bit his lip as he decided whether or not to show it. He breathed deep and handed the book towards the male and looked away.

Whenever you’re away I get so worried something will happen that I fight off the urge to break into the military zone and find you. When I think about you my heart beats too much sometimes I feel like I’m going to have a heart attack. I don’t know what to do when you’re not near me. But I’m always safe. You don’t need to worry.

tlouxlei-blog

The world was at peace right now, was that a sign? He never noticed the sun anymore, nor the clouds or the stars, but he always noticed it these days. Wasn’t there a saying that everything seems brighter when you fall in love? Lei didn’t know if it was love, he’s never felt it, but what else could explain that uneasy feeling in his stomach? How else could he explain why he was never in his right mind around Jackson. It was complicated enough trying to understand who he was and what he wanted to be, but God did Lei feel like a real person when he was with him. He felt like he could sing and dance and parade around in front of thousands without getting a shiver of doubt and all because he would do anything to see Jackson smile... was that normal? Lei didn’t even know right from wrong anymore.

When he heard the writing scratch away on the notepad he didn’t really respond to it. The sound was almost like a small melody, a soft and sweet song that he grew used to. It was even soothing and sometimes he even asked Jackson a long question just to be lulled into a daydream. It was like Jackson was there and while he dreamed of what the doctor sounded like, he didn’t need it, this was enough for Lei. The corners of his eyes caught Jackson handing over the notepad and Lei’s eyebrows shot up out of curiosity. He wasn’t expecting anything special, just casual conversation like always, but as soon as his hand reached out and his eyes landed on the words, there seemed to be a voice inside his head for the first time that felt like Jackson’s.

His eyes grew red, hands clenching too tightly around the notepad, lips twitching an eyes darting back and forth from the paper to the doctor that refused to look him in the eyes. That’s when the flashes of black and white movies entered his train of thought- the kiss and the embrace. Always a kiss. But Lei had never kissed anyone. His pen scratched away at the paper, nudging it towards the younger man with a small hum, fidgeting in his seat at the words crossed out and the small ink blots from where he pressed too hard.

Can I You Jack

I know I’m not the best at telling you how I feel and I always thought you’d be mad at me for not speaking enough. I’m not always happy, but you are. I want I’ve never met someone like you before Jackson. And I want to do everything I can to keep you safe. I know that when I see you I get this crazy feeling in my stomach that makes my head spin and I had a dream one day where we kissed and I don’t know what it meant but

I don’t know anything about making a guy like you happy, but I’ll try my best, okay? Just don’t get mad if I get too close to you, it’s the only way I know that you’re safe.

#{ para }#{ p; lit }#{ oh mY GOD }

As the last shot pierced the targeted skull with a dying bang, Lei wiped away the splattered blood on his forehead with a heavy sigh. He never meant to barge in like that, he just wanted to mind his own business, keep searching, but the person was to oblivious to see that an infected group was taking their aim inside the house. Of course, if the tables were turned, Lei would’ve probably dropped his guard for an instant, too. The small city was quiet- calm enough to fool even the best bandits and soldiers.

“Look back next time.”

#tlou:open #{ just in case anyone wants some lowkey interactions!! feel free to message me if you want something pre-established!! }

tlouxlei-blog

Lost In Translation | J&LS

tloujackson-deactivated20160306

Jackson was easily entertained. He was often laughing or smiling. And with Lei he found himself laughing a lot. The older male seemed to enjoy making him laugh which he didn’t mind. He felt relaxed around the other when he showed how normal he was and not someone to fear. Jackson laughed the most when with his twin, however, his time with Lei had made Jackson laugh a lot as well. Despite his age, Lei, to Jackson, seemed the laid-back type. He could be totally wrong though. He has been in the past.

The young doctor watched the soldier sit down beside him with a smile. Jackson enjoyed sitting on places like this roof. He had a fear of the dark and here he didn’t have to see the darkness as much as he would on the ground. He was also able to be alone and enjoy the weather. Having spent half of his life being trapped in doors, being outside was the best place for Jackson. When he saw the other man frown it made Jackson confused. Was there something on his face? But as soon as that frowned turned into a smile Jackson grinned. He had always thought that Lei looked better when he smiled.

Jackson silently chuckled. I’m not trying to be. I just didn’t know I was that predictable, he wrote. Jackson shook his head, ignoring how the way the other was biting his lip made him feel. I’ve finished for the day. I’m just waiting to see if I’m needed. He poked his tongue out. The blonde male watched the older reach into his pocket and for a moment the doctor felt fear. But then Lei pulled out a small pen and he relaxed. He watched as Lei wrote on his notepad, his face blushing upon reading what was written. He bit his lip.

Me? Why did you want to see me?

tlouxlei-blog

Lei could only remember the old cheesy feudal Chinese movies his mother used to watch when he was young. The type that had fearless warriors and the damsels in distress- He thought that’s what he had to be like, he thought that’s want Jackson wanted. Actually, isn’t that what everyone wanted? He read it in books, too. The princess falling in love with the hero at the end because of a massive act of bravery and courage. All Lei could do was fight infected and Jackson being a doctor kind of meant the younger man was more of a hero than Lei already, so his idea of perfect romance wasn’t the most cohesive nor the easiest to achieve. And he couldn’t exactly walk around trying to rack up a steady kill streak and boast about it to the younger man, that seemed oddly grim and even he had to admit, rather distubring.

So he opted for ways to learn and adapt to Jackson. He would smile because Lei noticed Jackson would smile, too. He would wave because the doctor liked to wave. And he would laugh because somehow he knew that it meant things were alright between them. Even now, a low and husky chuckle made it’s way out of Lei as he watched the heat rise up in the doctor’s cheeks, which according to the other soldiers meant Lei was doing a good job. It was still messy, though, Lei had to admit. He still didn’t know how to feel, he never knew how he acted. Sometimes he never replied the way he was supposed to, some called him robotic and tense, but the soldier couldn’t change that. Sometimes there wasn’t much to go off of.

He gave a steady sigh, leaning back and placing his hands onto the cement roof, looking back up at the sky, the words burning on his eyes. “I don’t know,” He answered after a second. “When I’m asleep, sometimes your face pops up out of nowhere. When I wake up, all I can think about is what’s the best way to protect you if there’s an outbreak, but then I remember than you’re nowhere near me and my heart starts beating too fast and I have to leave early because I don’t know if tomorrow I’d get to see you again.” His eyes darted back to the doctor beside him, a smile no longer on his lips. “I just want to know that you’re safe.”

#{ para }#{ p; lit }#tloujackson

allasianguys

#{ soldier }

tlouxlei-blog

Lost In Translation | J&LS

tloujackson-deactivated20160306

Wang Jackson was the kind of person to find himself growing close to a lot of people. He is the kind of person who can find themselves attracted to more than one person at a time. Which Jackson would do at times. He had never been in love, but he did feel attraction. Was it the same as love? He was told not. Love, he was told, was when your whole body reacts to them. It was when you can’t picture your live without them. This led Jackson to wonder if there was anyone in his life that he felt his whole body react to, One person sprung to mind: the military soldier, Lei. Something about the older male made Jackson feel special. Lei was eight years older than he was but he didn’t mind. Age was but a number.

When Jackson would talk about Lei, his fellow medical staff and even his patients would laugh at him and congratulate him for at last finding someone worth caring about. They knew that Jackson was easily attracted, but he never spoke of the others as he spoke of Lei, he was told. Perhaps it was because- wait, were they both Chinese? Jackson would have to ask. As a doctor himself, Jackson knew that what he was feeling was nothing that could be medically explained.

The 23-year-old Chinese doctor had finished his shift at his clinic and was now sitting atop the roof of an abandoned cafe. He heard footsteps and he knew those footsteps well. He turned his head to grin and wave at the taller male. He nodded and closed his eyes as he felt the soft wind blow his face. He got out his notepad and began writing.

I like the weather and the view up here. How did you find me? Shouldn’t you be on patrol?

Jackson frowned at Lei in question. Why was the older male here anyway? Not that he minded, of course.

tlouxlei-blog

There was tiny grunts and huffs of breath as he made his way up to the roof, not minding the sounds as much as he would any other day. Call it a sort of running gag, make himself look clumsy and boisterous to get a smile out of the doctor. usually it didn’t work and Lei just ended hurting himself in the end, but he got a laugh out of, which a rarity for the soldier. He didn’t want to be strict and tidy like he was with during patrols- He wanted to seem laid back. At least that’s what another soldier have told him to act like. SO far, it had gotten Lei and Jackson this close so it was advice worth remembering.

Lei shot a look at the notepad as he sat down next to Jackson, feet carelessly dangling over the empty shop. He looked up at the sky, blue sky and clouds, looked down at the streets, no signs of infected, and then looked over at the man beside him, a crinkle on Jackson’s forehead. At least the weather part was right. He didn’t like seeing the doctor frown, which in return, made his own eyebrows shoot down. Did he do something wrong? Why wasn’t he smiling anymore? But then he remembered the question and even if there was no tone and voice, Lei knew that the frown came with concern. That meant Jackson cared and because of that tiny, insignificant thought, the frown came undone and Lei’s lips twitched to a form a smile. This was stage one, that’s what the other said. When you can only smile and shrug away the problems because they didn’t matter anymore. Not when you’re around that certain person.

“You’re not too sneaky, you know.” The low voice grumbled, sucking in his bottom lip to try to hide the fact that he wanted to grin. It was a habit that he never got rid of, he didn’t know why, but it always happened. “Besides, shouldn’t you be at work, too? You’re not one to point fingers, Jackson.” He paused for a moment and reached into his uniform pocket to pocket to pull out a small pen and stretched sideways to write on Jackson’s notepad with sharp and small words on the corner of the paper.

I wanted to see you.

#{ para }#{ p; lit }#tloujackson

Lost In Translation | J&LS

Liking someone- Lei never thought he’d live to see that day. There was always the push to date, even in these times. The guys would talk about the girls they would get with and the married men who were lucky enough to still have their wives would tell them how their relationship was stronger than ever. He would hear about first dates and first kisses, how smiles meant different things, that body language was always the first thing to look out for. Somehow, horniness was never was the first thing on Lei’s list of problems, but he didn’t speak for the others- He just sat back with open ears and listened to the rest rant about their lack of intimacy. Maybe that was something he should think about, attraction. Of course he only knew the physical, but he never understood how that could be the only precursor to getting in bed with someone. Was that all there was to it?

But somewhere along the way of his grand exploration of sexuality and jumbled mess of questions regarding sex and first times, Lei didn’t really expect to become interested in the young man that never spoke. Truthfully, he never expected to start liking anyone. Yet the words scrawled onto paper had him smiling, had his stomach twirling. Which at first he thought was a sickness and was only made fun of by a doctor when Lei voiced his concerned. Lei has a crush. It was a mockery and the other soldiers followed suit, making slight jabs at him when he spoke about Jackson. But he didn’t understand... what was he supposed to crush?

He grew a habit of visiting the guy when he wasn’t supposed to and was even scolded for not showing up to patrol duty on time, but Lei just apologized, knowing fully well that the cycle would just start over the following week. Which is how he got to the point he was out now, hand waving at the lonely man sitting on the roof of what used to be considered a small cafe. Now of course, it was run over by vines and flowers and open air, but this side of the outskirts was relatively safe- What more could he ask for?

“Having fun?”

@tloujackson

#{ para }#{ p; lit }#tloujackson

Dear No One | JS&LS

Static. Endless static. He should be used to it by now, after days and weeks of trying, but he still isn’t. There are shrouds of something in his voice- Hope? No, it’s always been more morose than that. Sadness? Maybe, that seemed about right. It’s the only thing tat felt natural anymore. A few of the guys said that this place was where they had the best results on their walkies. Lei didn’t trust them, he never did, but this wasn’t an opportunity that he could doubt. It was a lonely clearing, just off the steps of a broken hotel, he had to curve around rooms and railing and even make his way up a few flights, but he was here and that’s all that matters.

At first he didn’t hear the steps that echoed behind his own, around these parts, Lei always assumed that someone could be following. When he stopped, the sounds behind him stopped, yet he didn’t seemed to mind. If someone wanted to steal or attack, they would’ve done it by now. So he stayed put, fiddling with the dials and the channels on the walkie, mumbling a few words here and there until like a knight in shining armor, a clear sound letting a jolt of happiness out of his mouth, a soft and delicate hum. In the matter of a second, the shadow lurking behind wasn’t important anymore, the threat of infected and bandits was the least of his worries and for the first time in years he felt happy.

“Feng,” His voice stretched out, the walkie talkie sounding on and off. Lei waited a beat, the seconds passing by as the all too familiar feeling of despair washed over him. “Don’t make me talk alone like last time again.” There was a fake laugh and a faltering smile, almost like he was showcasing his false beliefs to the empty world. That’s how it started to feel anyway, the words and the stories going out, never to be heard by anyone’s ears besides his own. His head cocked to the side, hearing for the lurking person, making sure no sudden moves were made, but then he stepped down, turning his attention back to the radio. “You’re boring, you know that?”

@tlouxshin

#{ para }#{ p; dno }#tlouxshin

housedemarr

#{ soldier }#{ NICE }

everysongaday

Visit Original Link

tlouxlei-blog

They take away each piece of you,

your life, your soul, your world

#{ ost }

Full Metal Jacket | JK&LS

The soldier ran a hand through his rough hair, not really paying attention where he was going. The whole situation was kind of strange, kind of weird that it had to be Lei to get more training. Yeah, he wasn’t Korean and wasn’t trained the same way the other gunners were, but he had a hand, good eyes and could shoot just as well as anyone else, if not better. But he kept quiet, bowed his head lightly and followed directions like the good soldier he was. His soft kicks made the rubble bounce int he air, filling the grey day with dust and apprehension. Was he nervous? Maybe, just a little. Angry, yeah, that was there, too. Of course he kept it all under wraps like always- If the foreigner tried to talk back then the others would jump at him. That’s how it always happened.

He knew that it was the other soldiers and patrol guards that talked behind his back to get them away from him, but Lei didn’t mind, if they didn’t want to be around him then he wasn’t about to act the same way. His commanding officer told him it was childish, that revenge and stupidity wasn’t going to be tolerated, so Lei did just that. When he reached the small training ground on the border of Zone 2, Lei gave a rough look around, eyes wide and searching, that strange bubbling in his stomach making him feel sick. Nerves, that’s what they're called, right? He answered his own question with a shake of his head because the last time he was nervous he had run away from his mission and the last thing he wanted to think about was everything before Seoul.

There was a calm here, at least that was certain. Lei didn’t feel pressured to act like others around him. The targets and barrels didn’t fight back, they didn’t bite or scream or run. That was always comforting. He looked around again, waiting for the man that was supposed to teach him to be better, but all he was greeted with was silence, that same silence that could make a man go crazy.

@tlouxjongkook

#{ para }#{ p; fmj }#tlouxjongkook