Tmnt 2012 x Reader //continuing from my previous one shot “to big to hide”
This was requested by @shyflame003
 The first warning sign had been the shedding.
Not the scales—those were weird enough on their own—but the fur.
“Why is there so MUCH of it?!” Mikey cried, holding up another clump of dark green fuzz stuck to his arm. “Bro, he sheds like an alpaca!”
“He’s not an alpaca,” Raph grumbled.
“Then why is my pizza furry?!”
Down in the abandoned subway tunnels beneath New York, Y/N ducked his massive head guiltily, giant amber eyes soft and apologetic. The mutant lizard whined low in his throat and shifted his weight carefully.
A mistake.
CRRRRK.
Everyone froze.
Slash slowly lowered the crate of stolen grocery store produce he’d been carrying.
“…Tell me that wasn’t the wall.”
The tunnel wall cracked a little more.
Y/N immediately stopped moving altogether.
“…Oops.”
For over a month now, the giant mutant reptile had been living underground with Slash and the Mutanimals after the panic from his mutation finally died down. What had started as “temporary hiding” had turned into an increasingly complicated situation involving:
1. Fur and scale shedding everywhere.
2. Food costs high enough to bankrupt a small nation.
3. The horrifying realization that Y/N was still growing.
And currently?
Problem number three had evolved into a full-blown disaster.
Because Y/N was stuck.
“Okay,” Slash said slowly, pinching the bridge of his snout. “Maybe if you breathe out.”
“I AM breathing out!”
“Less.”
“How do I breathe LESS?!”
Y/N was currently wedged sideways between two support pillars in an old maintenance tunnel, one arm pinned awkwardly above his head while his tail disappeared somewhere behind him like a trapped alligator.
The Mutanimals had been trying to free him for three hours.
Three.
Hours.
Mondo Gecko was eating popcorn while watching.
Leatherhead had tried pulling.
That had only succeeded in making Y/N yelp and the tunnel groan ominously.
Slash stared at the disaster in exhausted silence.
Then, with the heaviest sigh of his life, he pulled out his T-Phone.
—
Raph arrived ten minutes later.
He stepped into the tunnel.
Looked at Y/N.
Looked at the cracked concrete.
Looked at Slash.
Then back at Y/N.
“…You gotta be kidding me.”
Y/N gave a tiny embarrassed wave.
“Hey, Raph.”
“HOW?!”
“I got hungry.”
“That does not explain ANYTHING!”
Slash folded his arms. “You said not to call your brothers.”
“I KNOW WHAT I SAID!”
Another crack echoed through the tunnel.
Raph looked up nervously.
“…Okay, yeah, no, secret’s over.”
—
Twenty minutes later the others arrived.
And somehow it got worse.
“Okay!” Leo announced, climbing off the Shellraiser with confidence. “We came prepared.”
Donnie jumped out after him carrying an alarming amount of equipment.
Mikey hopped out holding—
“…Is that butter?” Raph asked.
“Eight sticks,” Mikey said proudly.
“…Why?”
“I dunno. People grease up pigs sometimes.”
“That is NOT the same thing!”
Y/N buried his face in his claws.
“I’m gonna live here forever.”
“Aww, don’t say that, big guy,” Mikey said sympathetically. “We’ll get you unstuck.”
He paused.
“…Probably.”
“Encouraging,” Y/N muttered.
Donnie immediately entered full science mode, scanning the tunnel walls with a handheld device.
“Interesting. Structural integrity is declining at approximately—”
The ceiling dropped dust directly onto his head.
“…rapidly declining.”
“Great,” Raph groaned.
Leo crouched near Y/N’s side, inspecting the situation carefully.
“How did this even happen?”
Y/N looked ashamed.
“There was a pizza truck.”
“…A whole truck?”
“It smelled really good.”
Mikey gasped softly. “Honestly? Respect.”
“Not helping,” Raph snapped.
Slash crossed his arms. “We tried pulling him out already.”
“Forward or backward?” Donnie asked.
“…Both.”
“And?”
“Lots of screaming.”
Y/N pointed weakly. “Mostly me.”
Donnie adjusted his goggles.
“Hm. The issue isn’t just width. His dorsal spines are locking against the concrete edges whenever he moves.”
“Translation?” Mikey asked.
“He’s too pointy.”
“Ohhh.”
Donnie grinned suddenly.
“I have a plan.”
Raph immediately looked suspicious.
“That sentence has never ended well.”
—
Ten minutes later.
“Absolutely not,” Y/N said.
“You wanna stay stuck forever?” Donnie asked.
“…No.”
“Then trust me.”
The Shellraiser had been backed halfway into the tunnel. Attached to its rear winch was an elaborate pulley system Donnie had assembled with terrifying speed.
Leo held the blueprint.
Mikey held butter for some reason.
Raph stood nearby ready to catch falling debris.
Slash looked deeply regretful about every life choice that led here.
“Okay,” Donnie said, pointing. “Step one: Mikey applies lubrication.”
“YES!”
Mikey sprinted forward with horrifying enthusiasm.
“This is the weirdest day of my life,” Y/N whispered as butter got smeared along his scales.
“Trust me,” Leo replied. “This doesn’t even crack top ten for us.”
“Done!” Mikey announced proudly.
“You used ALL the butter?!” Raph yelled.
“He’s a large dude!”
Donnie ignored them and secured the winch cable carefully around Y/N’s torso.
“Now, on my mark, the Shellraiser pulls while Y/N exhales and rotates clockwise.”
Y/N blinked.
“…What?”
“Twist your hips.”
“…Oh.”
Raph snorted loudly.
“Shut up,” Y/N muttered.
“Everybody ready?” Leo called.
The group nodded.
Donnie raised a finger dramatically.
“Three…”
The winch motor whirred.
“Two…”
Concrete cracked.
“One!”
The cable tightened violently.
Y/N twisted.
The tunnel SHRIEKED.
And suddenly—
FWOOOOOMP.
Y/N shot free like a champagne cork.
Unfortunately physics immediately betrayed everyone involved.
The giant mutant lizard slid completely across the buttered tunnel floor and slammed directly into Raph.
“WHOA—”
CRASH.
Both of them smashed through a stack of old crates.
Dust exploded everywhere.
Silence.
Then Mikey burst into hysterical laughter.
“Oh my gosh—”
Raph shoved a crate off himself angrily.
“I HATE ALL OF YOU.”
Y/N lifted his head from the wreckage, dazed.
“…Am I free?”
“You are never allowed near narrow hallways again,” Slash said immediately.
Leo walked over, trying very hard not to laugh.
“You okay?”
Y/N looked sheepish.
“…I think I pulled something.”
Donnie adjusted his goggles smugly.
“But you are unstuck.”
“…Yeah.”
Another pause.
Then Y/N’s stomach growled loud enough to echo through the tunnel.
Everyone stared at him.
Y/N smiled nervously.
“…So, uh… anybody else smell tacos?”
Raph pointed aggressively.
“NO MORE FOOD TRUCKS.”
Mikey was already climbing back into the Shellraiser.
“Too late, I know a place open all night!”
Y/N’s tail wagged hard enough to knock over a traffic cone.
Slash groaned.
“We’re never financially recovering from this.”