Star Trek: The "X" Generation

Steve reviews the amazing crossover novel featuring the cast of Star Trek: The Next Generation and Marvel's X-Men.

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Chapter 6 - A Walk Down Memory Lane

Pages 43 - 48

Not a lot happens in Chapter 6 except more sexual tension (between a 60-year old and a 30-year old) and a bunch of “That One Time On The Enterprise-D” moments.  Basically this chapter doesn’t seem to be of much use except to possibly foreshadow a romance between Picard and Storm.  I don’t honestly know, because I haven’t read ahead.  I only just finished this chapter!

We start the chapter with Picard using his best “Extras” voice to order Storm an herbal tea (and man, is this a specific herbal tea generated by the Computer):

"On the Enterprise," he replied, "we have everything." Selecting a blend of rosehips, orange peel, and blackberry leaves, the captain programmed the replicator to manufacture it.

The two chit-chat for a little bit, and it’s a little boring - basically, the X-Men and the TNG crew met in a previous comic book and used a “Time Hook” to return to their correct time.  It worked for the TNG crew, but not the X-Men - hence their return to the 24th century.

But then it gets a little spicy in The Captain’s Ready Room...

Storm grunted softly. "No doubt, you were surprised to hear from us." 

"I was," the captain agreed. "Though to be honest, I often found myself thinking about you." 

He realized how that must have sounded and felt his cheeks flush. It was not a pleasant sensation. 

"That is," he added quickly, "about your group. To be honest, I had never encountered anyone quite like you."

Good cover, Jean Luc.

They talk some more, and then get into another “Remember that time this happened on the TV show?” moment surrounding Picard’s flute-thing from The Inner Light.

"Yes. Something about the flute you have not mentioned." 

Suddenly, he realized what she was talking about. "I had . . . a friendship with someone a few years ago. She played an instrument as well. We enjoyed participating in duets."

Duets, eh Jean Luc?  

Storm leaves some things unsaid, Picard wants the mutants to go for “tests”, and the chapter ends.  Good riddance - let’s hope the plot moves forward in chapter 7!

[tngxmen]

Chapter 5 - Nodding as Sexual Advance

Pages 38-42

In Chapter 5, Michael Jan Friedman decides that simply speaking is not good enough for the Enterprise crew; they have to be doing something with every line of dialogue. I don't think there is a single instance of a character simply "saying" anything - and the most notable action is The Nod.

I stripped Chapter 5 down to the sentences where characters nod:

“Clark nodded. The counselor nodded.Troi nodded.Nodding in a friendly way to the willowy brunette, the first officer took his place beside her.He nodded to the first officer and took up a position beside him.Storm nodded.”

And it's here that it seems like The Nod is shorthand for sexual advances in the 24th century, especially when Riker nods to the random Brunette transporter chief. Although, Riker follows that up with giving the chief a history lesson about previous TNG episodes.

While that little flirtation is more subtle, this chapter features a more overt suggestion between Wolverine and Troi:

"His anger was gone now. The frustration, too. A new complex of emotions was taking hold in the mutant--a mixture of happiness and relief, along with a hint of . . . Troi blushed. Wolverine grinned."

I'm going to keep an eye on this development - at this point I'm assuming Wolverine is focused mainly on Troi, and won't be hitting on every woman on board the Enterprise.

The only other note of importance is the wonderful Bromance between Worf and Wolverine:

"Coming forward, he held his hand out to the Klingon. Worf grasped it enthusiastically--and no wonder. In their last meeting, he had developed quite a respect for Wolverine's prowess as a warrior."

This can only lead to some great one-liners in a future action sequence, I'm sure.

Chapter 6 to come. Like Riker, I'm just warming up.

[ryannorth]

I made a shirt illustrating the essential tragedy of our generation. Available for 10 days only!

[tngxmen]

Best shirt ever (until space ships are made available)

[tngxmen]

I’m just going to leave this here for you.  Chapter 5 coming soon.

[tngxmen]

Just read Chapter five (finally). Whole lot of nodding going on. New posts soon!

[tngxmen]

Chapter 4

In reading this novel, I get the feeling that the only direction Michael Jan Friedman was given was, "hey you could write something like a fanfic where the X-Men and TNG universes meet" and then wrote it exactly as a bad fanfic where two franchises come together. This chapter is another "nothing to see here" chapter that sets up one major conflict and one stupid conflict. We start out back on Xhaldia, where we meet some new people with new powers and possibly one who can influence people. Maybe Erid is not the leader of the revolution? Oh yeah and they are busy pointing out that the guards holding them prisoner are afraid of them. But after that, it's time for Picard to beam aboard Starbase 88,where for some unclear reason Wolverine has been locked in the brig and they need to send Troi to smooth things out. I'll let you figure out which is the stupid conflict here. Beyond that there are some great lines, including Banshee's mention of the "silly wee brig" and Picard's talk of "Wolverine's emancipation". Alright, can chapter 5 be a little more interesting?

[tngxmen]

Last time on Star Trek: The Next Generation...

So before getting right back into the swing of things, since it's been about two years since I read the book, I thought it would be helpful to have a look back at the first three chapters. When we last left the crew of the Enterprise, they re-joined their friends The Uncanny X-Men at Starbase 88. Apparently the X-men were causing a lot of trouble aboard the Starbase, so they were eager to be rid of them aboard the Enterprise. Also, Worf gets majorly trolled by the senior staff. Meanwhile, on The planet Xahldia (aka Space Scotland), many of its inhabitants are developing strange mutations - some of which are literally nightmare fuel. Naturally, the solution is to lock them all up in some giant castle. Some Japanese admiral who just happened to be one of Picard's former instructors (coincidence or will this come into play later in the novel??) assigns the Enterprise to take care of this dilemma. And that's where we left the crew...chapter 4 next week!

[tngxmen]

Chapter 3 - Pages 27-34

I don’t think Star Trek has ever been a franchise that takes it’s sweet time in getting into the meat of the story; we usually get a quick intro that sets the tone for the story, and then we dive right in.  That, I suppose, can be attributed to the limited amount of time given to writers to tell a story. I think the novel writers need to keep that in mind, too, because Friedman is taking his sweet time setting up this story.  Honestly, I would probably have cut the first three chapters into one by now - but I’m getting ahead of myself here. Chapter three links the previous two chapters and prologue to the Enterprise-E crew.  Picard is hailed by some Japanese admiral - Admiral Yoshi Kashiwada - who apparently was one of Picard’s instructors in the academy.  Picard does his standard Tunic Tug (I’m serious: “He pulled down the front of his uniform top...” - Page 27), and complains to himself that duty pulled him away from tea and crumpets with Worf.

Awesome illustration by Xyloart

The two exchange fawning compliments of each other’s beauty for what seems like hours (seriously, this is not a good trend for Friedman to be taking) before getting to the point of the call: The X-Men are at Starbase 88, and want to see Picard.  Picard orders the course to be set for the Starbase, and that’s that. But then!  We get to see some more of Space Scotland Xhaldia, and learn a little more about Erid Sovar’s crazy mutation from the prologue.  Apparently if he touches any source of light he starts shooting lazer beams.  That’s not terribly convenient. Anyway, not much goes on here except an inside look at the giant castle where all the mutants are being held against their will.  Also, Friedman chooses to list Sovar’s observations in actual list form rather than try and blend them in - you know, actually write well.

As Erid Sovar entered the room, he tok note of three things. The first was the presence of a thickset, blue-uniformed administrator behind a large … desk. The second thing Erid noticed was the light streaming in through a large … window. Erid’s third observation was that there were no guards in the room. … (Page 29-30)

We swing back to the Enterprise, where we see Lieutenant Sovar again.  Remember him?  Totally related to Erid:

Lt. Sovar, a security officer with bronze skin and a brush of blue-black hair, was manning the tactical console.  He looked up from his monitors, seeming to sense the captain’s scrutiny. (Page 33)

So, after exchanging more pleasantries for another hour, Admiral Yoshi and Captain Picard agree to meet in half an hour to talk about the X-Men.  But we can’t leave chapter three without highlighting this gem:

“Jean-Luc,” said Kashiwada.  “I see you made good time.” It was a joke, of course.  Starship travel was precise.  Seldom did a vessel vary from its schedule by more than a few minutes. (Page 33)

Chapter 4 is next!

[tngxmen]

Chapter 2 - Pages 17-26

Not much happens in Chapter 2; if there were subtitles for chapters in this book, Chapter 2’s subtitle would be “X-position” (I was going to think of a better title, but honestly this was the best I came up with).

It starts off back at Space Scotland Xhaldia, where some government official is reading reports of freak mutations all over the planet.  There’s a lot of familiar-sounding mutations, and actually the descriptions of the mutated people’s reactions are slightly disturbing.

"A Mercasite gymnast had come close to suffocating when she somehow encased herself in an impermeable, metallic skin."

Basically though, the entire purpose of this chapter is to do two things.  The first is to set up the main conflict of the novel, which is the Xhaldian people being dicks and trying to confine all these mutated people into an isolated area away from the rest of society (for their own safety, honest!). The second is to give us a reason for Worf being on the Enterprise.  Honestly, nobody needed a reason.  He can be just there.  One throwaway line is all you need - Insurrection did that perfectly.  But then again, without this extended scene, we don’t get the amazing troll job the Enterprise crew pulls on him.

Here’s some brief background: Worf has been living on Deep Space 9 for a while now, and recently married Jadzia Dax.  We are told all of this in the novel, largely for the purpose of establishing where in the Trek timeline this takes place (because it’s expected that we know what the hell Friedman is talking about). 

Worf is returning to the Enterprise for some sort of diplomatic mission that involves Klingons somehow, and anyway blah blah blah he’s totally looking forward to seeing his old friends.  Except that when he arrives, there’s no one to greet him in the transporter room.  This is Step 1 of Operation: Troll Worf. Worf’s reaction is priceless.  Picture him doing the Charlie Brown sad walk off of the transporter pad.  Sort of like this:

Then, he runs into Picard, who also is all, “Oh, what? No we’re not busy we just didn’t come to see you”.

"Mr. Worf!" the captain exclaimed.  The Klingon suppressed a smile.  "I am pleased to see you, sir."

"You look well," said Picard.

"As do you, sir."  He eyed the captain more closely.  "Has something pressing come up?  Something of which I should be aware?"

Picard looked at him.  "I...don't believe so," he responded finally.  "Why do you ask?"

Worf sighed.  "No Reason."

At this point Worf is completely out of sorts.  And instead of being all Ragey Klingon he is Mopey Kilngon.  Being the reader, we have the advantage of knowing this is a clear set-up for a surprise party - something which Worf should come to expect by now from his friends.

Here, have an illustration of Sad Worf, courtesy of Xyloart:

But he doesn’t, and the characters literally yell out “SURPRISE!” and engage in a healthy round of mocking Worf.  Worf pretends to be annoyed, but deep down, he loves it.

And then some sort of emergency is communicated to Picard by a Lieutenant Sovar, who maybe has some sort of relation to Erid Sovar from the prologue?  Maybe?

One last thing - Chapter two addresses a plot hole I didn’t even think about when I watched Worf’s wedding on Deep Space Nine: Worf didn’t have a single Enterprise crewmate attending his wedding (unless you count Chief O’Brien, but by that point he was part of the DS9 crew).  It’s like once you join a new post, you drop your old friends unless they show up as a special guest star in some other episode. Whatever.  I hope something actually happens in Chapter 3?

[tngxmen]

Chapter One - Pages 9-16

Chapter One is pretty short, and serves primarily as a cheap way to introduce the X-Men characters into the Star Trek universe.  We’re introduced to two new characters, and I noted them thinking that maybe they might be somewhat important.  However, it looks like they’re just some red shirts (who happen to not die in this scene).

We have Security Officer Marco Palmieri, who doesn’t even deserve a rank beyond “Security Officer”, and his Security Chief, only known as Clark.  She’s a woman, and that’s really all we’re told.  Palmieri is patrolling the corridors of Starbase 88, bemoaning the lack of any actual action and adventure.

“Palmieri didn’t see anyone attempting to break into one of the cargo bays.  He didn’t see anyone sabotaging any of the internal sensor nodes.  He didn’t see anyone, period. No surprise, he thought.  There was never anyone to see.” (p.9)

Come on, Marco, haven’t you seen any horror movies, ever?  Heck, I’d even give you suspenseful scenes in action movies.  Whenever you start complaining about how boring and dull everything always is, THAT’S when the big monster comes and tears you to pieces.  Seriously, this guy doesn’t learn, especially not even when the Starbase sensors pick up what they call a “temporal flux artifact.”

“Laying his hand against the security pad on the bulkhead, he watched the door slide aside.  It was dark in the bay, but he had his palm light.  Palmieri took a few steps inside and played the light over the uneven terrain of stacked cargo containers. Nothing to see.  But when was there ever?” (p.11)

Naturally, that’s when something happens.  Some sort of bright flash lights up the whole cargo bay, and in its wake appear seven strangers - some who Palmieri thinks are from alien races he’s never seen before, the rest young humans.

t’s pretty easy to figure out that these are the X-Men when we hear what’s got to be Wolverine speak:

“I’ve got a better question,” said a third voice.  “Where are our wee timehook devices?” A fourth one spoke up gruffly.  “Gone, it looks like.  And don’t that take the flamin’ cake.”(p.12)

Before I continue, I just thought I’d point out the line, “wee timehook devices.”  I don’t even know what the hell he’s talking about but it sounds funny to me.  Alright, so Palmieri sees seven X-Men, and I’ve been able to identify six of them.  We have: - Archangel - Nightcrawler - Wolverine - Collossus (who Palmieri at first thinks is a shapeshifter - nice touch, to be honest) - Shadowcat (who I think is Kitty Pryde or something? She’s the one that goes through floors) - Storm - And some red-haired Irish guy.  Xyloart tells me this is Banshee, whose mutant power is the ability to scream really loud.

Look at this awesome illustration she did!  I'd like to imagine that this is how they appeared in Starbase 88's cargo bay.

Two more things to address before finishing the chapter. First, I had mentioned in the prologue that I thought Friedman was a decent writer.  This chapter just blows that notion out of the water.  Not only do we have examples like “Abruptly, without warning, …” (p.11), but we have a huge problem with the scene that takes place in the cargo bay.

Friedman is using the fact that it’s a dark room with no lights to try to build some kind of tension: Palmieri can’t clearly see who these strange people are, and thinks that possibly they’re from the Dominion.  It works okay, but then this happens after a brief fight between the X-Men and Palmieri:

Reinforcements, Palmieri thought.  And none too soon. “Lights,” said Clark. Instantly, the cargo bay was illuminated. (p.14)

Lieutenant Redshirt could have just turned on the lights?  My suspension of disbelief is now gone, Michael Jan Friedman.  Thanks.

To close things off, the X-Men finally realize that they’ve seen the Starfleet uniforms before (in the crossover comic, Second Contact).  Then, Banshee asks if the security chief has heard of the name “Picard”.  The answer has gotta be yes, right?

“The name sounded familiar to Palmieri.  Then he realized where he had heard it before. Jean-Luc Picard was the captain of the Enterprise, the flagship of the fleet.  If the stories about the man were true, he had saved the Federation from destruction more than once.”(p.16)

Are you kidding me?  How does a security officer - granted, one that sounds pretty low on the food chain if he can’t turn on the lights in a cargo bay - not immediately recognize the name Picard? My head hurts.  Onto Chapter 2!

[tngxmen]

Prologue - Pages 6-7

Sorry, no illustrations today.  This review is just too short.  Lots happening in Chapter One though, so stay tuned!

So aside from bulking out and turning into some weird hulking mass with metal cables for veins, Erid Sovar also has this happen:

“A brilliant white beam shot out suddenly from one of his fingertips and struck a nearby stack of rocks - shattering it with explosive force.  He stared at the stunted pile that remained.”

Okay, I think I’m composed.  

“But what if one of them hits me? he wondered.  If these beams can shatter rocks, what will they do to flesh and blood?”  

Translation: “Never touching myself again holy crap wtf”   Anyway, eventually the beams stop coming out of all his fingers and they return to normal, and stop glowing.  However, he “knew in his heart that the nightmare was just beginning.”  No kidding!   Well, that does it for the prologue.  Chapter One continues on Page 9!

[tngxmen]

Prologue - Pages 2-5

(I said I was doing a page-by-page review, but I’m obsessive in that I would rather not stop reading when a page ends in the middle of a sentence. So this is why you’re getting three pages today. And two next week.) Okay, this Michael Jan Friedman is actually a pretty decent writer. Apparently he really knows his way around the Star Trek universe. He does a pretty good job of painting a picture here. Page two starts off at a similar pace to the first page - that is, pretty slow and not quite clear what’s going on. Apparently Erid Sovar wants someone to be there with him, who may or may not be his gay lover (or simply a close friend). All that is known really is that Sovar has to climb something called “Otros Paar, the legendary Field of Heaven” without any food or water. You’d think he would be a little concerned about this predicament (that he willingly submits himself to), but instead he sits down and starts to sing! Apparently this is supposed to initiate whatever transformation he’s expecting to undergo. I hate to break it to you, Erid, but it sounds like more of a spiritual transformation than a REAL transformation. OH WAIT NO I WAS COMPLETELY WRONG ABOUT THAT. Shortly after he finishes singing he starts seeing the world differently - he sees it as beautiful, even if it is full of rocks (so I guess NOT Space Scotland?). And then this happens:

“...One of his feet slipped and missed its niche, and the rest of Erid followed it with amazing quickness. The next thing he knew, he was lying on the ground, the side of his head feeling raw and bludgeoned.”

Yeah, he totally fell and possibly cracked his head opened, but LOLZ it’s no biggie for Erid, he just rolls around on his belly and laughs. And then he actually does start changing:

“...He realized it wasn’t just his legs that felt heavy. His arms felt that way too. Weighted down. And thick. Swollen, somehow. And their veins were popping out as if they wanted to burst through his smooth bronze skin.”

OKAY I GOT IT he’s turning into THE HULK! The back cover copy guys fooled us all and left out that there was also going to be a rad HULK crossover involved.

Illustration by Xyloart

“And yet, his veins and arteries were swelling before his eyes, standing out under his flesh like metal cables.”

Dude is totally turning into The Hulk. He’s all bulked out, repulsed by his own reflection in the water, and realizes that only his fingertips have remained normal. OR HAVE THEY? (Protip: no they haven’t!) TUNE IN FOR PAGES 6-7!

[tngxmen]

Wikipedia Entry

Because I seem to be doing updates on Sundays, here's a fun little read to keep your appetites whet for pages 2-5, coming up later on.

I went looking for some info about Michael Jan Friedman on Wikipedia, and ended up finding the "official" Wikipedia page for this novel.  Apparently, the proper title is Planet X, and doesn't involve ST:TNG or X-Men.  They just show up on the cover as a helpful indicator.

Here's a fascinating note; this novel is actually a sequel to an earlier Marvel crossover comic (let's not get into the fact that this is probably better-suited for a comic) called Second Contact, which is ALSO sort of similar to a different crossover comic where different X-Men encounter crew from The Original Series.  Unfortunately there is no link for Second Contact, so I couldn't blow my mind that way.  I will see if I can find it somewhere, however (on both Second Contact and this mysterious TOS/X-Men comic).

Unfortunately I spoiled myself a bit.  I won't give you all of the details, except that apparently the book hints at an attraction between Picard and Storm.  Man I can't wait for that.  Also I hope Geordi gets a crush on one of the mutants and has some romance woes.  Poor Geordi!

Anyway, I highly recommend NOT reading the plot summary (I held off!) if you don't want to be spoiled anymore than that.  Wikipedia is bad for that.

[tngxmen]

Prologue - Page 1

Illustration by Xyloart

Curiously, this novel begins not with a familiar face, but with an utterly foreign character: Erid Sovar. He and his friends are on a nature hike in some place called “the barren highlands of Ra’ad Cuhloor.” So they’re in Space Scotland, I guess?

I don’t know if I should even call Sovar’s companions “friends”, because they’re taking every opportunity to make fun of him:

“While Erid prepared himself for the task ahead, his friends traded scandalous stories about him and laughed even harder than before.” (Emphasis mine)

Two things I took away from this page:

1) Erid Sovar is clearly being set up as the main villain of the story (maybe he’s the green guy on the cover?):

“I will be truly different,” he said. “I will be so different from anyone else, you won’t know me when you see me again.”

2) It seems like Sovar is about to embark on a spiritual journey, and according to him, a transformation. Will Erid Sovar transform as he thinks?

Will his friends continue to tell scandalizing stories about him? Find out on page 2!

[tngxmen]

Cover Analysis

Star Trek: The Next Generation and Marvel Comics' X-Men: Planet X is a 1998 novel written by Michael Jan Friedman, and published by Pocket Books.  There's a lot going on with the cover for this novel - its promise of the best book ever is the least of which.  Let's take a look!

First and foremost are the featured characters.  From the Trek universe, we have Data, Riker, and Worf.  From the X-Men, it looks like Storm and Wolverine.  There's also a third character, unknown to me, but looks a lot like Prince Xizor from Shadows of the Empire.

Other than the publication year, Worf & Data's uniforms indicate this is during the First Contact / Insurrection era.  Interesting to note the similar fighting stances from Worf and Wolverine - perhaps we will get to see these natural-born fighters in action side-by-side?

The other thing that stands out to me is Riker.  What's going on with his rendition?  He looks like a cross between Season 2 Riker and Wesley Crusher wearing a collared shirt.  He looks nothing at all like Riker from First Contact (or Insurrection).

                                           Noticeably absent: Captain Picard, Professor Xavier, and Cyclops - some faces I would have expected to see.  At any rate, here's my version of Picard and Xavier:

                        BACK COVER

Storm is listed here as the leader of the "Uncanny X-Men" - so it doesn't seem likely that we'll see Cyclops or Professor X (pity - Cyclops and Geordi could have shared a moment).  There's mention of "hostile aliens" - is this a race we've seen before, or something new?

                Lastly I thought it was interesting that the X-Men are acknowledged to have come from another reality - I just finished reading "Dark Mirror", another TNG novel dealing with an alternate reality/universe!

This should be fun!

[tngxmen]

Star Trek: The Next Generation and X-Men: Planet X

So I found the greatest book possible while browsing Value Village last night:

                                              In the spirit of Ryan's BTTF Novelization Study Guide, I have decided to document this page-by-page.  There will also be illustrations to go along with this.

This is going to be really awesome, and I will start tomorrow with an analysis of the front and back covers - because there is a lot of cool things going on with that front cover.