Peter Murphy
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if i look back, i am lost

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@tommac33
Peter Murphy
Eraserhead (1977)
“A dream of dark and troubling things”
This is why They come back:
1. They see you are happy without them, and their ego is damaged. This will often cause them to reach out in hopes of trying to dictate your emotions to strengthen their ego.
2. They notice that you appear to be doing better and may believe that you’re beginning to move on. This belief prompts them to reach out in fear. When you successfully move on, it’ll make it harder for them to return.
3. They’re testing you to see if it is indeed possible to abandon you and return whenever they want to. They’re priming you for an extended roller-coaster of emotions. If they know that they can hurt you, disrespect you, neglect you, then leave and decide when they’ll return, then they’ll most definitely continue to do it in hopes of continually breaking you down. The more you let them back in, the harder it is for you to move on.
4. They’re either bored with the person they initially left you for and/or the person is no longer interested in them. When they leave all of a sudden, it is usually because they’ve taken an interest in someone new. Here’s something a lot of us don’t know: Some people use a relationships as a point of ownership, and even when that relationships ends for whatever reason, they will add your name to a list of names of people they’ve been with. They will then reference that list to see who they still control emotionally. You remove your name from that list by refusing to allow them back into your life.
5. Yet, in some cases, they return because they regret losing you, but it’s important to remember how and why the relationship ended in the first place. It makes no sense to allow them back into your life when you’ve spent most of the relationship uncertain as to how much you mean to them. Consider yourself rare. Consider yourself magic. Leave that mediocre shit alone.
I got the fever
Nick Cave | NYC, 1994
Photographed by Marina Chavez
Photo : Edward Colver
Henry Rollins & Nick Cave, 1984
Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds - Murder Ballads (1996)