Tamira Stardust @tomms-blogg - Tumblr Blog

✨HELLO, my names Tom/Tamira/Tommy/Tam/Tammy✨

I’m a bigender girlie and I go by she/her/he/they (I tend to prefer she/her)

My favorite color is red. My favorite animal is raccoons. I love my family, 20s-50s movies, and orchestral/big band music.

Vintage is my aesthetic and I will make vintage edits!!

I’m also a part of a system. So my folks will probably use this blog too.

(When that happens it’ll be marked/tagged as not being me)

✨~That’s all for me!!~✨

^(My favorite song)^

#Spotify #the tag my family uses is #(not actually tom)#but occasionally they’ll specify who they are #in which case it’s typically just their names

gratsu-prophet

Meet OP

Hello!! My name is Ray! This is a blog for Fairy Tail content, primarily Gray Fullbuster and Natsu Dragneel. Expect a lot of Lucy as well because she is truly the people’s princess.

I will take asks

I love interacting with people about fandoms! Don’t be afraid to message me :D

I however will not be taking any headcannons about Juvia Lockser. I will be posting and reposting some analyses about her in relation to Gray as a character- but she is a stalker and an abuser. Making that stance really clear really quick. I will not engage, I will just delete your comments and block you.

#hehehe #this is the hosts gf #she’s awesome and I love her work and you should support her silly fandom blog

terkaterr

since it came to my mind... hey trigun fans. i know most of you got into trigun 3 years ago or way before that, and there's just a real interesting trend among personal trigun friends i've noticed in the years since, so

to clarify, the question isn't "did trigun play any part in your syscovery". it's just about correlation, not causation

did you, a trigun fan, discover you're plural after getting into trigun?

yep

wtf is "plural"? (your answer is likely no)

idk, questioning

knew you were plural before getting into trigun

plural but not a trigun fan

not personally but i have friends who did

Voting ended onApr 14

#this is tough #the host was introduced to Trigun #back when it had only been dubbed and released for a few years in the us #incredibly formative to our childhood #there’s a massive possibility that our host is/was a Vash fictive #back when we had our Trigun renaissance in 2023 #it had a massive impact on our lives generally in terms of it being a special interest and something that unlocked a lot #of childhood memories #it sent the host in a tailspin over the idea of not being the original host #because of his memories only went back as far as having seen Trigun as a kid #and he was Vash #then who was the host before that???#Trigun gave us better communication with people outside the system #and helped us process a lot of issues about our body #and our trauma #it was extremely important to us #but did come back into our lives a few years after initial discovery #(then again Trigun was there waaaayyyy back when the host had already developed DID and was clearly formative!)#(den ramblings)

pencilswithwigs

Wolf wood sketch bc stargaze comes out todayyy 😝😝😝😝😝 genuinely tho I’ve been so busy I haven’t been able to finish that cowboy drawing yet. I need to lock in

alteredpanel

unrivaled champion of guess who

#many such cases #my partner is really good at this too #it throws everyone off #I remember when she identified Tommy or the first time #I think she just about jumped out of her skin #and then complained about how well she had been acting like me and was so upset she’d been caught #most of us struggle to remember that we don’t have to pretend to be someone else around her #and then she calls it out sometimes before we even notice and it’s so crazy

alteredpanel

#suuuch a good metaphor #we use the different roles in a theatre usually!#it’s a fun way to explain it to our friends #the concept of many people both on stage-offstage-in the house-etc #working to make a show come together so that a production can go on #is very much how we feel #our day to day life in a hard balance and a difficult show to put on but we all work together and impress audiences daily

alteredpanel

something from our files while i was digital spring cleaning

#our older folks certainly complain that the body is young and small #give me some space man I’m working on being 20 #I know you’re like 45 #but I’m really trying here #the kids seem to find it very fun that I’m “huge”#(in seriousness they’re often sad to be so big because they can’t hang out #with kids their age #they feel very alienated #it sucks that I’m old and they can’t go do kid stuff(

alteredpanel

siblings in bitching out

#we really appreciate the portrayals of fun mundane things like this #your work is so relatable #the triplets feel this very personally

alteredpanel

this just in does no one else fucking cough

#this happens all the time #my gf will be like #oh! yeah! I knew that wasn’t you because your posture changed!#and I’m like???? oh??? please do go on??#host rambles

patricia-taxxon

i know literally everyone in their mid twenties feels like they're still a kid but jesus christ i am functionally like 6 years old if you only count the years when i wasnt being physically or sexually abused & it isn't fucking fair that i need to be an adult now

#update that the whole realization of our humanity for real for real #happened late last year #it was like…September #my gf made me cry/pos #and then we listened to my favorite music…#which was Little Spoon by Patricia Taxxon #host rambles #(not actually tom)

alteredpanel

ice begins to melt

#we’ve read the comics on this blog #and we have to say #thank you #I don’t think we’ve felt this seen before #this comic particularly #we…uhhh…#yeah #it’s a familiar feeling #(not actually tom)

alteredpanel

i was going through our files today to clean and this is not a comic exactly but i think is topical and technically an entry to this diary regardless

#hehehe #I could tag each of us too #I will say I personally resonate with Service Animal style dehumanization #host rambles

alteredpanel

would be awesome if they had some sort of name for this sort of response

typenull

But, problematically, that act of allowing out the memories, the dissociative parts of the self that I had kept firmly in the box, brought with it a collapse of my previous coping strategies and my previous ‘logic’ for life. Things don’t work the way they used to. Life previously functioned a certain way, and then overnight, everything changes, and nothing is the same. As an analogy, a woman in her fifties goes to work in the morning and comes home in the evening and finds her husband dead in the lounge. Her life has unexpectedly been turned upside down. Suddenly, she can’t do what she was going to do that evening. She can’t make dinner and talk about her day and ask him to take the bin out and feed the cat. She can’t just get up the next morning and go to work and pop to Tesco’s on the way home and send a birthday card to her cousin. Suddenly everything is different. It’s a new situation. She’s got a funeral to organise, and she’s never done it before, and it’s overwhelming. She’s used to talking about her day with her husband and he’s not there. When she’s upset, she’s used to going to him for comfort and support, but at the point at which she most needs comfort and support, he’s not there. She’s not a married woman anymore; she’s a widow: it’s a change of identity. Her finances are different. She has to learn about the servicing schedule for the car and get someone to help her hump the Christmas tree down from the loft. Life is suddenly very, very different.

And when she goes a bit ’crazy,’ when she starts crying and can’t stop, when she sits and stares into space for an hour because she can’t figure out what to do next or how to do it, when she doesn’t want to go for a drink after work with her colleagues and can’t bear their jollity, when she can’t concentrate at work or remember what it was that she was doing, when she lies awake at night worrying about how to pay the mortgage… when all these things happen, no one actually says that she’s gone mad. Everyone understands that she’s in grief and that it will take time, perhaps a long time if the death was sudden and unexpected, for her to rearrange her life again so that the new normal becomes automatic and comfortable and comprehensible. And even then, for decades afterwards she may contend with the why? questions of sudden tragedy and life not being as sugar-sweet as the John Lewis adverts suggest. But when we have a ‘breakdown,’ when our dissociative coping strategy that has kept our trauma or abuse at bay for years or years suddenly collapses in the lounge and dies on the floor, and we find when we come home from work that it’s not there anymore, people don’t see our resultant behaviour as normal. Even we ourselves think we have just ‘gone mad.’ We don’t have a paradigm for it. And because there’s no corpse in the lounge, no funeral cortège, no life insurance pay-out and a bank statement in a single name, because it’s all intrapsychic and hidden in the undergrowth of our mind, then our outward behaviours do seem ‘crazy.’ When we can’t go to work the next day, and we can’t concentrate, and we keep bursting into tears, and we can’t bear to socialise, and we lie awake at night, and everything seems too much, then we don’t think, ‘This is normal.’ We think, ‘I’m insane.’

— Recovery is my best revenge: My experience of trauma, abuse and dissociative identity disorder by Carolyn Spring

Odd front trigger that threw me off, spent the rest of the trip to Walmart stuck in my accent and trying not to be weird in plublic

#it was great #the host’s friend asked me #“why do you sound like that?“ and I said “I saw a mushroom cow earlier and now it’s a problem“#The host’s partner laughed and she added “Yeah she has a name“#tom<3

atomicbugs

More art of him in a field. This is my thing now.

rajingdragon

Playing around with acrylic markers again

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