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@torridxdesires-blog
I have been having some MAJOR issues with tags on this page >.> half of them aren’t working & i am kind of annoyed with being torridxdesires ;] I never should have left eightholyterrors in the first place so I AM MOVING TO ONE FINAL BLOG. Last move. Come hell or high water I am not freaking moving again. Ever. SO come follow my blog. No threads are being dropped just tag me in them over there :]
&. IUA:
iua wondered if the promise was sincere. he had already exhibited that he hadn’t stopped even when asked. whatever experience the other was looking for – he could have waited for it. waited until iua was more comfortable with the idea and more willing. at least the other knew he didn’t want to be messed with at the moment. so his shower was a quiet one, a good place for him to think. once he finished, he walked out with the towel around his wait and search his box of belongings for some clothes. he was speaking to the other for two reason: one, he had nothing to say, and two, he wanted the other to know he was upset with him. cruel but necessary.
the longer cooper sat with only his own thoughts for company the W O R S E he began to feel. his fingers gripped around his knees as he drew them to his chest, & he tucked his head into his lap, wishing he hadn’t upset iua, but knowing he had. he listened to the shower from where he was sitting, & wiped at his tears. every second that iua was gone the weight crushed deeper & deeper into his chest until he felt like he couldn’t breathe. he finally managed to pull himself back together when iua returned, but just barely. the silence continued & he listened to the rummaging. ❛i...i am going to walk biscuit...❜ he finally breathed out, standing to his F E E T, he gripped his guard dog’s leash from the bedside table, and snapped it onto his collar, before hurrying from the room. the silence was killing him & he already felt so awful he couldn’t take it. he needed to be somewhere else. where he wasn’t hurting iua.
hope&aegon | unexplainable attraction
&. AEGON:
the hug was expected at this point, for the both of them were very affectionate between the two. there was nothing he wanted than to be with her, already discovered by the sheer fact that he would no longer be able to go without her ever again… but what of her father? even if SHE were to go against her own father, wasn’t he much more powerful than her? in addition, that would cause a rift between the family….. “i know that,” aegon replies nonchalantly, squeezing her tight before letting her go and wrapping the towel around her tighter. drying most of himself off and placing a robe over stark naked and pale frame, he turns the lights off and heads back into his bedroom to change, closing the door after she enters the room as well. “perhaps we shouldn’t talk about this right now.”
she feels awful, but she simply nods her head, knowing there is nothing more than she can S A Y to him. she knows that he feels strongly for family, & her own was the same way, but she had caused the rift. it wasn’t anything that could have been helped. her father never would have let her out from under his thumb if she hadn’t fled. she couldn’t have him blaming himself for anything. she wouldn’t have it. ❛i am in love with you, aegon. that’s all that matters, today, tomorrow, & forever.❜ she breathed out, her eyes flicked up into his & she kissed his L I P S. ❛alright, love?❜ she shed the towel, & threw on one of his shirts, & pulled on her shorts, beaming at him as she took his hand in her own.
&. HARA:
she hadn’t noticed that they’re sways were actually directed steps until they’re stopped and the surroundings have changed. no more grass and green. it’s faces and concrete. she’s lucky, really. to find someone like him – to find someone like him to even consider loving someone like her. she’s never seen so much in someone. and although it has and sometimes still overwhelms her to have all that love pouring into her, she needs it. her heart swells to swears she can feel it in her ears and feel it trying to lift her off the ground itself. she reaches up to take his face into her little hands. fingertips stroking subtly the edges of his face ( the place she knows so well ). she focuses on that. on every inch of his face. gaze running over it and soaking him in. she looks at him with nothing but adoration. “ okay.. i believe in you.. “
he smiled brightly when she insisted that she believed him. he knew that she had no reason not to. he had N E V E R lied to her & he wasn’t going to start now. his fingers cupped her cheeks, & he sighed softly. ❛i will see you at the alter love.❜ he guided her back into the shop, & left her in the care of his friend. he knew that the man would guide her to the church once she was done being dressed. it was only down the street, & he could already see the camera’s beginning to line up outside ( his friend had called in some favors ) he walked down the street, into the C H U R C H where he stood at the alter. waiting for her. ready as could be with camera’s galore to catch his wedding to blast on the news.
tabitha&jackson; keeping secrets
&. JACKSON:
the male shrugged. “just in case,” he mumbled to make sure she realised she had up to six months to change her mind on a large life decision. if it was up to him he would’ve already been sitting at the station. she clearly didn’t. the boy half smiled at her when she got out of the car and thanked him. “no problem,” he murmured as if he hadn’t saved her from all the men that were still waiting in line to get their way with her. as if he hadn’t saved her life from heart failure. as if he hadn’t punched james square across the face. as if he hadn’t stayed by her side for many hours while she was unconscious. the boy nodded at her request. “yeah i can stay with you for a bit,” he murmured. this wasn’t his car. it was his mother’s. “let me just park the car and i’ll be right over,” he smiled sweetly again. the boy parked his mother’s vehicle on their driveway before jogging back to her neighbour and taking her hand in his. “i’m right here,” he murmured comfortingly.
she was standing in her driveway too traumatized to do much of anything as she stared at him. she felt sick to her stomach as though she were going to lose her mind. her heart was palpitating rapidly, & she watched in general silence as he parked the car & returned to her side. she coiled her free arm around him, and kept her other hand in his own. she was S C A R E D to be alone even for a few moments, & she felt bad for treating him like shit whilst she was in the hospital, & even before that. ❛i’m sorry for everything jackson...❜ she breathed out, her hand lightly holding his as she leaned up to kiss his cheek, nuzzling her face into the side of his neck. she H A T E D the idea of being isolated from everyone at school, but she did still have him, even if she had lost everything else in the process.
&. KOL:
a growl escaped his lips as she pulled away from him but he stopped when her words sank in. was she serious? no, she could be lying and teasing him. he hated it now whenever she teased him. “you lie, sister,” he growled and grabbed her wrist roughly, tightening his grip around her wrist. “there is no child inside you. this is just another pathetic attempt to push me off.” but another part of him disagrees. what if she was telling the truth? he could never know with her.
she hadn’t had her monthly in two months. she was certainly with his child even if he refused to believe it. her wrist was once more tugged away from him & she gave him a hard slap with her other hand. ❛how D A R E you!❜ she growled at him, her fingers tightening into a fist. ❛believe what you want, but there is a child inside of me. i will show soon, brother & then you won’t be able to hide what you have done to me. i will be your whore for all to see, then what will you do? everyone knows i have laid with no M A N!❜ she insisted her hands reaching up to shove at him.
kat&danny; innocent love
&. KAT:
a small sigh of relief escaped her lips. she thought he was gonna leave her and the baby and break the promises he whispered and made since they were young. “o-okay,” she whispered, looking away from him. she knew she needed and craved his touches and him sleeping with her. but if that’s what he wanted, she would respect it no matter how much it hurts. “does this mean we can no longer be together in that way?”
he had been sickened by his own actions for the past few months now. he knew that what they had done was wrong, even if he told himself he didn’t care he D I D deep down. but he knew he couldn’t leave his sister in the mess he had helped create with her, & he nodded his head. ❛that is what it means. i will be here for you for all the rest.❜ he breathed out, his fingers tracing softly through her hair as he looked into her eyes. he wished things weren’t always so hard for them. but they were. they always seemed to be so damn difficult.
kyle&maggie; shame & distraction
&. MAGGIE:
The duration of the car ride was spent in tensed, drawn out silence, with only the scenery passing by in flashes and the sound of the engine filling the space between. Maggie would continuously glance over at Kyle only for her stares to be ignored or go unanswered as Kyle focused all his attention driving. She held herself together, thinking once they reached home she could try again to reach him, to get through to him that she was here for him. Neither of them had eaten or really even been able to stay out that long and spend any time together yet she had been able to learn something so personal and private, a deeply buried and terrible secret that he clearly was hiding from everyone else in his life. As soon as the car pulled into the driveway and stopped, she slowly followed after him. Maggie was scared of setting him off again but she couldn’t leave him alone.
her curiosity was a dangerous thing for him. he was going to go out of his mind with fear before the night was through. he could practically sense her judging him in the back of her M I N D. it was a terrifying feeling to be so out of control. he felt like his body no longer belonged to him, but to his mother. & now he knew his fate rested with his new ‘sister’ as well. she nearly had the ability to tear him to pieces. one little slip up & the whole world could know his shame. he heard the sound of her footsteps behind him & he rounded on her in the hallway, nearly to his room. ❛stop following me.❜ he breathed out, his eyes wild, but his fingers clenched together. he was trying desperately to R E M A I N calm. he didn’t need another outburst where he hurt her again.
&. SPIRIT:
「☠」; He couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow in the amusement of discovering just now ready she was to fire back anything he had to bring her way. at least she came prepared. “Hey now- listen here, LITTLE BIRD, i’d be careful with that tone of yours in here. you never know just who you might cross.” a small chuckle came deep from his chest, emitting a little glint in those dark eyes. “i don’t have to assert my dominance. see- the whole package of the situation at hand kind of does that for me, ya’know? not that i’m complaining.”
she wasn’t the least bit put-off about this house because of him. if his weak attempts at S C A R I N G her were meant to send her screaming that was not at all the type of female he had happened to cross paths with. he was in for some sorrowful disappointment on his end. ❛you think i am afraid to cross you, or any other spirit?❜ she laughed slightly, he had no control over his mouth that much was certain & she lifted her hand reciting the incantation she had learned, beginning to cause all of the blood vessels in his head to pop ferociously again & again. it would be severely painful even for a ghost. she had used it a few times prior to this. ❛you don’t know who you are crossing. i can do this all day.❜ she snapped at H I M, drawing energy from the house as well as her ancestors to cause him pain. ❛threaten me again, & you will feel real pain, spirit.❜ she pulled her hand back, ceasing the pain for him.
&. JAMIE:
Thick red brows shot up at her admission. So, it was really that he hadn’t come straight to her to tell her what had happened and what he was going to do that had gotten her angry? But could she really blame him for not telling her considering the circumstances? “Ye were sick, Claire! I didna want ye getting all in a fash. I would ha told ye when I got home. I didna think ye’d follow me.” And saying it out loud made him realise just how idiotic he had been. Of course she would have followed him. She did the only thing she could have done. She would have felt she needed to save Black Jack for Frank’s sake, and to try and save Jamie too. At the time, though, Jamie hadn’t exactly been thinking clearly. He just knew what he had to do, and he knew that he had to leave Claire out of it, and not only because he had been afraid of her stopping him.
Wetting his dry lips, his eyes flicked away from hers, just for a moment, just long enough to swallow the lump in his throat. “Aye, maybe you’re right. I should have told ye. But, Claire, do ye really think it would have made any difference?” Jamie knew he wouldn’t have, couldn’t have stopped. Not even for her. It hadn’t been about his need for revenge, any more, but a need to stop the sadistic bastard from ever hurting people again.
The way she was looking at him now broke his heart into a million more pieces. It wasn’t the anger that got to him, but the betrayal morphing her features into someone he didn’t quite recognise. Just that look made him want to reassess his decision to not fall on his knees and beg her to forgive him. He needed her to forgive him. But, as much as he wanted to be selfish, he knew her forgiveness would only mean something if she gave it freely, which Jamie doubted very much she would ever do.
“I wasna exactly thinkin’ of Frank at the time.” If he had been, he wouldn’t have done what he did, for Frank had been the whole reason Jamie had agreed to leave Black Jack be. He was poised to remind her of all this, and defend himself more, but it all died on his tongue as the next thing passed her lips.
“Our daughter?” It was a choked whisper as he took another involuntary step towards her, hands clenching in the fabric of his coat. Oh God. “Ye mean she didna…” He had to pause to clear his throat, constricted as it was by emotion. “Ye mean, she lived?” Nothing else seemed to matter now.
she was beginning to fall apart at the seams. she wanted to hold strong, to punish him for his crimes against her, & little faith, but she wasn’t certain that she could hold out. she was strong, but she had spent the last few weeks, birthing their child under strenuous circumstances, fretting & making arrangements for him, as well as caring for a newborn. she should have received a M E D A L for her job. she had done it well, considering her child was alive & well & now he was safely back at her side, even if looking at him still caused her pain. she knew she wouldn’t have forgiven him if he had taken this little life away from her, how could she had ever gotten over it? that was another reason she was angry, he almost threw away their entire relationship, all of the love she held for him on a M I S S I O N to kill a man he had promised he wouldn’t. oh she knew poor fergus had been scarred & maimed by that evil man, as had so many other innocent boys, but she couldn’t see him D E A D. her hands trembled as she wiped a few more of her tears. she didn’t know if she was ready to forgive him yet, even if he was looking over at her with those gorgeous blue hues, shock taking over his system as she announced their daughter’s life to him. she saw the way he clenched the fabric of his coat, his voice dry, & she almost felt S O R R Y for her husband. almost. she was still furious in a place somewhere in her consciousness, & that was what caused the next outburst she had at him. as he stepped forward so did she her hands reaching up to push at his front slightly, ❛no thanks whatsoever to her father, yes! she bloody well lives!❜ her sudden burst of anger was caused mostly by her lack of sleep, as well as her general residual A N G E R from all he had put her through. how dare he? ❛she came damn near close to dying in a premature birth that you set about with your damn pride! but yes no thanks to you at all she breathes air!❜ she gave him a few more firm shoves, followed by a slap, but he was like a mountain. she couldn’t have honestly F O U G H T him if she tried to. he could pick her up & throw her for sport & she would be powerless to do anything about it at all. she was in hysterics by this point in a full on breakdown out of nowhere. lack of sleep, coupled with worry had done a number on her body. ❛you almost killed her! you almost killed our little girl! so was it worth it?! was it fucking worth it?!❜ she gave another shove, & gave up, collapsing to her knees at his feet.
daisy&jimmy; married life at the freakshow
&. JIMMY:
The fingers running through his mussed hair create a smile upon his tired expression, and he rests his head upon her chest without hesitation. His eyes travel to her belly, which was still flat as a board at only one month’s gestation – and he places a hand upon her bare skin, rubbing in gentle circles.
“ No disappointment here, ” he chuckles a bit, relieved and glad that his once-emptied chest now contained nothing but happiness and pure love for his woman. He takes his eyes off of her belly and brings them up to her beautiful eyes.
“ How could I ever think that anyone else would make me happier than you do? ” he asked, shaking his head, and he smiles. “ I can’t believe we’re havin’ a baby. ”
she felt relief as she heard his words. her body was finally able to relax because she had believed that she would disappoint him. it was simply something that was now etched into her very being, because of all the times jimmy had S T R A Y E D from her right after they laid together. it seemed sometimes that he didn’t enjoy what she gave him enough to stay, but this day things were different. she felt a shift. her fingers traced the side of his cheek, & her lips pressed into a line, smiling softly. ❛i just...figured they must. you always seem so, annoyed.❜ she breathed out in a soft manner. she was always so loyal to him, wanting to make everything better for him. she had never crossed him not once. she was too kind-hearted for that. ❛soon we will have a babe of our very own.❜ she whispered her H A N D taking one of his to place over the flat expanse of her stomach.
&. ELSIE:
this being a first for the both of them meant that elsie didn’t feel nearly as awkward has she had whilst admitting the fact. the blonde had been in ‘relationships’ with a number of people; however the extent of anyone being her boyfriend was only ever minimal, she’d never experienced love before. & maybe what she felt for jason wasn’t love yet, but it was something more. ‘ i don’t doubt that you’ll treat me right, ’ she mused, it being the complete & utter truth. the thought of something like this, them, becoming a reality had been so far back in her mind that she hardly knew what to expect. however, one thing she could assume from the get-go was that she’d be happy. finally elsie could be with someone she truly wanted & someone who she believed truly wanted her as well. ‘ this is something new for the both of us, there’s no expectations. i just want to be with you. ’
he had no fear of mistreating her, if the truth were told. he had never done so when they were friends, & he wouldn’t lay a H A R M F U L hand on her as her lover either. he traced his fingers up & down her side, lightly keeping her close, but lazily keeping his head on straight. ❛i wouldn’t harm you no matter what.❜ he mused, & smiled at the thought of their little piece of forever. he was lucky to have found her. in a sea of women he had found the one girl that he could love more than anything. ❛& you will be, love. i don’t expect anything from you either.❜ he mostly knew what to expect as it was. he didn’t want her to change anything about herself. in his M I N D she was perfect just the way she was. sitting up on the couch he pulled her onto his lap, & tucked his arms around her waist, kissing her lips.
&. HARA:
she’s just itching to put her thumb back into her mouth when he pulls it from her mouth. she whimpers softly and a tremor surges through his palm – he must of felt it through his hand, or at least she think he has. maybe its just one of those things that are just in her head. she doesn’t want to kiss but she doesn’t want him to go away either. not now, anyways. this closeness is something she’s lacked for too long. and there’s something good about breathing air of another. feeling the breath of another. her thumb goes back to her lips and she closes her eyes tightly, nosing her face into the sheets. slowly, she starts to light up on the crying. she tuckers herself basically. but she doesn’t sleep. she alternates between sucking on finger and looking at him. “ i don’t? “ she supposes there’s something kind of comforting about that. that its okay not to know how to be okay. that it’s okay not to be okay.
he pulled his lips back from hers when he sensed her discomfort & stroked her cheek, feeling relieved that he had managed to calm her down a B I T, & his blue irises gazed softly into hers. her words gave him a bit of relief, because he felt as though he was actually helping her for the first time since she had began to panic. he nodded his head at her, kissing her forehead, ❛of course nah...ye do’nah have to ken anything, lass. ye just have to want to live.❜ he stroked her cheek, & then her hair, wanting to give her love & comfort, but he felt as though all he ever did was cause her more P A I N than anything else. ❛ye are going to be just fine, lass. there is no need to fash.❜ he breathed out, knowing she would probably worry either way, but at least he was trying to make things better for her.
claire&sebastian; falling into france
&. SEBASTIAN:
immediately, he JUMPS at her touch, wondering how a woman could be so forward, especially since he’d just met her the day before. how uncharacteristic, especially of a MARRIED woman. “w-women do not usually take someone else into their bed if they are married…” a sigh escapes him, mind screaming over the fact that she was not his to kiss. not his to do anything but ACCOMPANY during her time away from home.
she knew that she was M A R R I E D but that was some time in the future...or was it her past? she was confused by the time continuum she seemed to have walked right into at the standing stones. her lips pressed together & she found a smile gracing her lips. ❛i am a widow.❜ was all she offered in response, since her husband wasn’t alive yet. she wasn’t even technically alive yet. she leaned in closer & captured his lips, rubbing him harder up & down. ❛besides. you are already in my bed.❜ she breathed into his ear as she trailed kisses along his jaw.
jason&sailor; points of need
&. SAILOR:
sailor has always appreciated his affection IMMENSELY. any gentle touch was one that soothed, and any stress that had haunted her over her day dissipated as she laid with him, her hand sliding down to his shoulder, the pad of her thumb sliding against the fabric of his shirt. “one day we won’t have to worry about it at all.” a content smile forms on her lips at that, the decision that her words were reality evident in the curvature of her lips. “was today really bad?” she questioned idly. she would like to say that she could SENSE these things, but she could tell from things like how he held her. their connection wasn’t like one people often understood. a shiver went up her spine at the feeling of her twin’s fingers on her bare skin. she tried not to squirm although her face scrunched up at the kiss on her cheek. she had a tendency to flinch at the touch of anyone, but not him. sometimes something new took longer to get used to, but she would get there in the END. “g-good.” her eyes stayed shut and her breathing evened out quickly. the calm overtook her again as her eyes fluttered open, meeting his lovingly.
he had made her many promises before & he had never broken them. not the promises he made to his twin. she was like his O T H E R half she could tell if he was saying things that were untrue. he knew he couldn’t hide how awful school had been today, even if he had covered up the bruises by keeping his shirt on. she would notice, since he usually stripped it off when he came home. he liked the feeling of her warmth against his bared chest, but it was different today. he nodded his head, clamping his teeth together after a long moment. ❛it was.❜ he tended to grow depressed rather easily, but he was slowly getting better about it. his fingers reached up to T R A C E the line of her jaw, wanting to make the memories escape from his mind. ❛i want to forget.❜ he said fter a moment, his fingers tracing down her cheek, & back down beneath her shirt, rubbing her skin, anywhere that he could beneath her shirt, feeling the warmth pressed against his fingertips.
&. AVERY:
Avery listened to Danny speak and felt her heart wrench with each word he spoke. She had been there through these H O R R I F I C events, but yet she couldn’t do anything to stop them from happening; she had tried and got reprimanded for it by her boss. Avery swallowed as she fumbled with her fingers before taking a step closer to him, brushing her fingers against his arm lightly. “Danny, please don’t P U S H me away,” she whispered as she felt her heart quicken in pace at the mere contact she was having with him. Avery knew that she should watch what she said and did, but at the moment in time, she didn’t care if she got in trouble for having feelings for the male because these were the first feelings in decades that made her actually feel human again. “Please,” she added softly. “I promise you that nothing bad will happen when I’m around,” Avery stated as she bit the inside of her cheek.
he couldn’t lose another person just because they were standing nearby. he could live alone for the rest of his days if that was what it took. he never would have C A R E D about being around her if it wasn’t so dangerous. one dead person was life, but close to five? that was a pattern, & he was scared to let her nearby. shivers took root as he felt her fingers once more against his skin, pulling him towards her, & making him feel as though being around her was the most necessary thing in the world. ❛you can’t promise me that...❜ he breathed out, but he was starting to feel tingles through his entire body & the urge to keep her close was causing him to move to stand closer to her, until his body was pressed against hers in an E M B R A C E as he leaned to kiss her cheek. ❛you should stay away...❜ he breathed out, though he didn’t release her from his hold.
hope&aegon | unexplainable attraction
&. AEGON:
something was bothering her, that much he could see ( for aegon wasn’t a man of many words but he was more observant than most ). letting go of her hand at those very words, his heart sunk to his stomach, now worried over the fact that his life was in danger merely because he loves her. it was too complicated ; it wouldn’t work. stepping out of the shower, he heaves a sigh, reaching for the towel and wrapping it around his waist before another is wrapped around her much smaller figure. too many problems, too little time, and he just hopes that everything will be alright. “one step at a time, i suppose.”
she saw the way her beloved was looking at her & she felt guilt sweep into the bottom of her stomach. she should have T O L D him sooner, but her father was a monster. he had pushed his own family to threaten to disown him more times than she could count & he generally lost his temper several times a day. she feared what he would do to her beloved aegon. she was certain he was beside himself with anger right now. he was probably raging at everyone demanding that they find her this exact instant. she began drying herself with the towel, before she moved to hug aegon. ❛it will be alright. i would never let him H A R M you.❜ she insisted, knowing she needed to be vigilant just like she had been her entire life.
