IT'S 2019 GUYS

100% canon stuff approved by katsuhiro otomo himself, if he has talked to you too feel free to submit

[sally-spears]

INFLUENTIAL BISEXUAL ANIME PROTAG DUEL! WHO WOULD WIN AGAINST THE OTHER IN A FIGHT?

Shotaro "Too Lucky To Die" Kaneda

Akira "Legs Blown Clean Off By His Boyfriend" Fudo

Voting ended onApr 11, 2023

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Kai: A woman's place is on the battlefield

Yamagata: So you think women should die

Kai: Funny how you immediately assumed the women would lose the battle…. Misogynist much?

Yamagata: You're right I will reflect on my behavior. Sorry women.

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

I hate the type of healthy person who says eating fruit is um actually bad for you because it’s “too much sugar”. Shut the fuck up. These bananas are lucky they’re being consumed and not rotting on my counter like their ancestors.

- Kaneda

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Kaneda: Do you think that Jesus saw me looking at art of Komaeda shitting. Considering he witnessed every sin or whatever

Kei: He didnt witness every SIN, he took on the burden of knowing everyone's PAIN. Emotional, physical, psychological... Every kind of pain you could possibly fathom, in the garden of gethsemane. But if you believe in an omnipotent god, and that Jesus is a part of god, then yes he has seen you doing that. I dont think thats a sin though.

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Kai: Having the worst ibs attack EVER!!!!!! feels like the entire scp foundation is coming out of my asshole

Kaneda: I bet you wish the entire scp foundation would go up your asshole 🙄

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Kai: It’s beyond nuts when british people call flashlights torches.

George: They are are torches. Flashlights implies that they go on and off.

Kai: They do that’s what the button is for…

Kaneda: People from British just smash it against the ground when they’re finished and go buy another one.

Tetsuo: People from British.

Kei: Great post everybody.

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Kaneda: @ all my vampire friends who worry they aren’t “real vampires”: you are vlad

Shikishima: This sounds suspiciously aphobic and possibly terfy

Kei: Are you aware that you are responsible for the funniest post on this site

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Smoking so much opium by the time im sober again im not attracted to marvin the martian anymore

- Kai, probably

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Tetsuo: War and hate on planet venus.

Kaneda: Suck my blood and kill my penus.

Yamagata: Everybody wants to rule the world!

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Kai: If you are reading this I want you to stop for a moment and imagine a crab.

Kaneda: Pinch pinch.

Kai: Yes.... Thats the spirit..... Keep it up.

Kei: Scuttle scuttle?

Kai, vibrating with barely contained power: Yes...... YES...........

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Tetsuo: High school sucks man. one time these kids shoved me in a submarine and welded it shut and then lowered me into an ocean of blood and it was this whole thing.

Kaori: Didn't that happen to the beatles?

Tetsuo: Yeah the beatles were there that's why it sucked.

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Kaori: The fact that there are only two numbers between 4 and 7 is so twisted and fucked up im literally going to be sick.

Kaneda: The girls are learning to count.

Kei: Technically there’s an infinite amount of numbers between them but I’m afraid if I try to explain decimals I’ll either lose my gay card or get shot.

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Chiyoko: Kaneda we need to have a talk about your professionalism

Kaneda, standing on a chair: those are some mighty brave words for someone standing in lava

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Kaneda: All living things deserve freedom.

Kaneda: Freedom to weed, to vape, to Fortnite...

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Kiyoko: Tetsuo, you can be really destructive-

Tetsuo: I CAN!?

Kiyoko: I wasn’t giving you permission!

Tetsuo: TOO LATE!

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Kaneda: Tetsuo, I think you’ve gone mad with power.

Tetsuo: Of course I’ve gone mad with power. Have you ever tried to go mad without power? It’s boring. No one listens to you.

[totallylegitakiraquotes]

Kaneda: Hey, Kai, can I borrow 300,000 yen?

Kaisuke: why would you need ¥300,000?

Kaneda: for an escape room

Kaisuke: what kind of escape room costs ¥300,000?

Kaneda: ...Jail