AuDHD Mary Bennet in Elena Gilbert’s body

That 30+ y/o ficwriter with cool job and hobbies.

[laifing]

Maybe this time

Pairing: Mildred Hubble x Nick Hobbes Tags: Second Chances, Angst, Minor Character Death, Slow Burn Word count: 1,836 Chapters: 1 / ? Summary: Two people constantly telling themselves that they are not right for each others.

Nick was restless, fidgety, he couldn't stop the bouncing of his right leg.

The man sitting with him in the waiting room kept talking about his sweet Sugar and how he couldn’t bear the thought of his sweet Sugar delivering her pups at home, she had to have the best, and such, and such. He kind of realized the man said something that required an answer, so he just nodded, and the man kept talking. Until he realized he had made another question. He was asking about Mona, Mona was his late grandmother's cat. Mona, for all Nick knew, was an eldritch immortal being, she had been his grandmother’s cat since he could remember, even showing in photos with his mother when she was a child. 

[programmerhumour]

Funny how that works

[ferrousferrule]

I am so pleased at how many notes are some version of “I don’t fear the science, I fear the corporations who control it” because that is EXACTLY the attitude you should have. GMOs can save us. Monsanto will kill us.

[brunhiddensmusings]

what people fear about GMO- ‘theyre gonna make frankencarrots that crave human flesh and cause diarrhea ’ what GMO actually is- ‘we made rice crop that is both drought resistant and flood resistant which will prevent about 20% of major famine disasters, also it now makes vitamin A because vitamin A deficiency in poverty stricken areas is a major killer of kids as most vitamin A rich foods dont grow there’ what people SHOULD be upset about- ‘i made all crops sterile so all farmers have to buy the seed from me in perpetuity and i will sue anyone who tries to go back to crops that produce their own seed’

[mugwomps]

That’s it exactly. GMO is great ciant corporations can go straight to hell

[tragictriangle]

Same about nuclear energy. It’s like having an energy cheat code.

But I’m having a hard time trusting any of our govts or corporations to not screw us all up AND WHEN they screw up to come forward immediately and not after the public outrage

[aguywholikestanks]

Actually, nuclear is incredibly safe, for the same reason that planes are less likely to get you killed than cars- they’re so ridiculously regulated that they basically can’t fail.

[tragictriangle]

But I didn’t say anything about the technology itself being dangerous.

It is SOECIFICALLY about people managing it.

I will officially depart from this planet if a nuclear plant would be caught being wielded with hot glue like Boeing nowadays, if we are talking about aviation here. Or like other big airline companies planes just start dropping from the skies like it was in the states in years 25-25. And allat attention the technology gets from AI moguls does not excite me either in light of all those data centers documentaries.

Imo nuclear energy is solar punk technology, an angel technology. It’s for grownups. We are on some kind of stagnated teenage-hood as a society.

Even existing and perfectly operating ones are a constant source of nervous breakdowns because our world order is so screwed it’s not forbidden anymore to do military operations near them.

And I’m not urging for abolition. I want a leash to tight on our govts so that NOTHING resurfaces in some poor African region barren with orphan sources anymore. Or Brazilian favellas, or Caucasian mountains. So nobody messes with Chernobyl dome anymore, Italy pays reparations to Sardinia, US pays to Polynesian nations an so forth.

Capitalism, colonialism, patriarchy would inevitably mismanage and demonise it.

[aguywholikestanks]

Absolutely tragic to say, but the powers that be actually cooked with this one. The field of Nuclear power is one of like 3 systems total that people kind of just leave to the professionals. Very much not the case all over the world, and especially not historically, but nowadays the field has proved itself very capable of learning it’s lessons.

[tragictriangle]

Again with this slight shifting of the topic.

I have no bad things to say to the chernobyl dome workers, all the kudos and money to them.

That drone that hit it nearly a year ago, not so much, and constant threats to Iran’s nuclear facilities does not help the case either.

You can not pretend that “the field” exists in a vacuum and is not influenced by outside forces, and politics above all.

That one is tragically true.

[programmerhumour]

Funny how that works

[ferrousferrule]

I am so pleased at how many notes are some version of “I don’t fear the science, I fear the corporations who control it” because that is EXACTLY the attitude you should have. GMOs can save us. Monsanto will kill us.

[brunhiddensmusings]

what people fear about GMO- ‘theyre gonna make frankencarrots that crave human flesh and cause diarrhea ’ what GMO actually is- ‘we made rice crop that is both drought resistant and flood resistant which will prevent about 20% of major famine disasters, also it now makes vitamin A because vitamin A deficiency in poverty stricken areas is a major killer of kids as most vitamin A rich foods dont grow there’ what people SHOULD be upset about- ‘i made all crops sterile so all farmers have to buy the seed from me in perpetuity and i will sue anyone who tries to go back to crops that produce their own seed’

[mugwomps]

That’s it exactly. GMO is great ciant corporations can go straight to hell

[tragictriangle]

Same about nuclear energy. It’s like having an energy cheat code.

But I’m having a hard time trusting any of our govts or corporations to not screw us all up AND WHEN they screw up to come forward immediately and not after the public outrage

[aguywholikestanks]

Actually, nuclear is incredibly safe, for the same reason that planes are less likely to get you killed than cars- they’re so ridiculously regulated that they basically can’t fail.

[tragictriangle]

But I didn’t say anything about the technology itself being dangerous.

It is SOECIFICALLY about people managing it.

I will officially depart from this planet if a nuclear plant would be caught being wielded with hot glue like Boeing nowadays, if we are talking about aviation here. Or like other big airline companies planes just start dropping from the skies like it was in the states in years 25-25. And allat attention the technology gets from AI moguls does not excite me either in light of all those data centers documentaries.

Imo nuclear energy is solar punk technology, an angel technology. It’s for grownups. We are on some kind of stagnated teenage-hood as a society.

Even existing and perfectly operating ones are a constant source of nervous breakdowns because our world order is so screwed it’s not forbidden anymore to do military operations near them.

And I’m not urging for abolition. I want a leash to tight on our govts so that NOTHING resurfaces in some poor African region barren with orphan sources anymore. Or Brazilian favellas, or Caucasian mountains. So nobody messes with Chernobyl dome anymore, Italy pays reparations to Sardinia, US pays to Polynesian nations an so forth.

Capitalism, colonialism, patriarchy would inevitably mismanage and demonise it.

[femtocloaca]

[marcelshorjian]

the impossible return

[tragictriangle]

That colour scheme is so perfectly Slavic nostalgic for me I can’t, it’s like I’m looking at an old linen embroidery

[continent-of-wild-endeavor]

[zagreus]

[be4weturntodust]

And nothing in between

[tragictriangle]

And the fact that the space between required a fake persona that would just suck all the remaining joy out of your life with how fake it is. Stardom included.

[tragictriangle]

Just a random pop up with my new journal fit. Feel cute do not see why I’ll delete it later

[tragictriangle]

I KNOW WHAT IM MISSING.

It’s the coziness of it all.

Like I immediately went with “how do I make it the most appealing?” way of things and now thinking about oh, it might be not as pleasant as I thought it would be.

Well no shit Sherlock. Living in a home and living in a gallery are two completely different experiences.

I think it’s also my masking. Like it’s around 90% of my time, I barely know myself “makeup-less”, not to be confused with not knowing yourself at all, but, yeah.

The over performance of it all is what got to me momentarily.

It’s honestly a good thought, that I caught what’s going on so fast. Barely two days in. Now I can, you know, go forward mitigating the damage.

And I think it would actually improve my life, slower pace-wise. No expectation, no showing my actual writing.

Just me venting my thoughts.

I want journaling to feel like that one episode of The Worst Witch from 1998 when they went to Missis Cosie tea house.

I WANT COZYYYYYY!!!!

NOT JUST PRETTYYYY!!!!!

*Feral ‘tistic girly sounds

[tragictriangle]

A follow up post — FREE JUNK I got for my Louise Carmen replica

I’m not joking by saying free, FREE LIKE AIR (for now at least, thank you Capitalism)

I’ve mentioned before that I work in contemporary field and we recently finished an art fair.

We all know events means free promotional materials right?

RIIIGHT????

I got at least 5 kg of paper out there and reworked only two of them during my shift.

Ohh they are glorious. I’m getting anxious just looking at them🥺

Like yall I would become ABSOLUTELY INSUFFERABLE when I’ll manage to pull it all off.

Like do you see it? The antique jewelry and 18th century dresses?

The photography?

I just finished three most pleasant hours in an entire year.

It’s gonna be something between Hannah E. Johnson Gallery Girl aesthetic, Princess Sissi of Austria, some morbidity here and there…

My dream is to make it look like a goddamn magazine, you know, like the good ole 2000s. But it’s all for meeeee🤤

It’s just that I have a very dyspraxic writing sooooo….

Also a little perk of English world abandoning cursive, on top of my wonky ass hand changing four different styles at one page, I can kind of not worry to show my actual writing, like I want someone to ATTEMPT to decipher that😆

Did I mention it was all for free yet? Can I do it again?

Like I know living in bigger city and working at certain places is a privilege, but honestly?

I would have made

[tragictriangle]

…..so I’ve picked up my Louise Carmen replica from mail and GOT TO WORK.

Already regretting my color choices but I guess it’s a necessary part. I just did not think Crazy Horse would be this liiiight bordeaux color, PLEASE GODDESS MAKE IT PATINA FAST😣

NEVER THOUGHT MY LOVE FOR VAMPIRES IS SO VISIBLE BEFORE DOING THIS THING.

Oh well, that’s on trauma processing, we’ll get there.

As for the charms, the patch, all of it I had for ages, because well Trinket Autism (tm) and actually super proud of it, no excess spending on decorative junk, yuppe!)

On the front there is one lost earring with a tiniest dried rose in epoxy resin. Tres Twee Chic, had it since at least 2014-ish, so it’s a proper Tumblr Peak relic. 🥸

Two on the sides are my Sun sign pendant from a flea market and another lost earring, this time it’s Rhodolite, bought it in the vibiest place in my hometown. Nothing but school books and sketchy magic shops in sight, and now it’s all gentrified😡

I removed the second notebook and inserted a literal chunk of another, older one of mine with blank pages. It’s seen some better times but has a tooon of character and, recycling!)

Like why do we have to waste perfectly good pages of abandoned diaries/planners/notebooks?

Literally took my kitchen knife and oop, here it is)

Would follow up with additional posts about its insides because it’s a ZONE baby.

So much so that I’m afraid that thing would be abandoned in two weeks.

How much I hope I will be wrong if yall only knew…

[nightmaredazzling]

🥀𝕲𝖊𝖗𝖆𝖗𝖉 𝖂𝖆𝖞 | 𝕾𝖈𝖍𝖔𝖔𝖑 𝖋𝖔𝖗 𝕷𝖎𝖙𝖙𝖑𝖊 𝖁𝖆𝖒𝖕𝖎𝖗𝖊𝖘🧛🏻🩸🖤⚰️🦇

[princesslilymay]

[tragictriangle]

It feels spiritually Elena Gilbert coded, at least in my AU way of things

[1111angelgirl1111]

2014 pale grunge

[tragictriangle]

And Pastel Goth. Two my biggest snob regrets

[unicornedup]

⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧

[glittertearsandfearsx]

can just something new ever happen to me ? I wake up, feel the same thing, eat the same thing, watch the same show, watch that same person, wear the same thing, listen to the same thing, and sleep the same way I did yesterday and the other day… and last week.

I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one who wonders about this too much?

[tragictriangle]

Like THIS is the type of girlhood post I yearn on this app, not the endless fair and pink, Lolita Lana and ED propaganda.

We need weird girlhood, feral girlhood representation here

[polkadollyy]

[theeggoman]

Our girlfriend looks so pretty from outer space