Trash panda

Just some random Alt for transformers only, 18+ (Main Blog is helena-and-helena-meta) They/Them/Any pronouns

[transformers-racoon]

Just putting random shit out here for transformers since my main blog, while it has transformers stuff, also has other fandoms. Plus I like raccoons, you cannot stop me and my dumbassary. :3

Some of my posts are just random things I was going to post on my main blog but decided against it. A lot of my shit is just random ideas that I like throwing out.

A lot of my posts are platonic based because, while I do have romance stories on my other blog, I don't really see myself as very good at romance.

The link for Canary Protocol because I'm proud of that shit, even though I mainly post it on my main account.

*Raccoon noises*

(Please someone tell me the origin of this, it's funny as shit)

[transformers-racoon]

I added a tidbit about Ratchet disliking smoking in Canary Protocol, but how would the other Autobots feel about smoking? Especially after learning about the side effects of smoking.

I feel like Ambulon would be pretty pissed, just like Ratchet, but he'd probably give a calmer lecture, just "Why are you using that for stress relief when you have other things to do?"

First Aid probably just tries to gently remind the human in question, "Hey, that's bad for you," and tries to give healthy alternatives. If the human keeps smoking, he'll probably give a long lecture, but he's basically a gentle parent. (Ignore the fact he killed Pharma out of revenge for Ambulon.)

Pharma would probably lecture the human and tell said human to stop, just like Ratchet in the story, with constant "Put the cigarette down, human" lectures. The human probably gets Pharma just staring daggers at them until they comply.

Perceptor isn't too happy about the use of nicotine. He also gives lectures and tries to give the human healthier alternatives. He's not as aggressive with his lectures as Pharma and Ratchet, but not as gentle as First Aid and Ambulon.

Brainstorm threatens to make the cigarettes blow up whenever you want to use them. Because it's Brainstorm. What do you expect from the literal mad scientist? (He also doesn't want to lose another person, especially to something that can be stopped or prevented.)

[helena-and-helena-meta]

So here's all of the parts for Canary Protocol, so far that is. I'm putting them in one post for a navigation kind of thing and I'll give it a Canary Protocol tag so it'll be easy to find on my blog.

Ao3 link

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

[transformers-racoon]

Hey, there's the thing I write as Helena META :3

[transformers-racoon]

Do you think some Cybertronians would have favorite movies or TV shows?

Like, would Thundercracker like Rescued By Ruby? (Do not show him A Dog's Journey or A Dog's Purpose; he will die.)

I feel like Drift would like Avatar: The Last Airbender, and Rodimus would probably enjoy it too, mainly because of firebending.

Brainstorm would like Mythbusters, but he'd also argue that he could do everything better. Perceptor now hates Mythbusters because Brainstorm blew up the lab. Most of the Wreckers are not allowed to watch Mythbusters.

Ugh, I need more ideas... AAAAAAA

[transformers-racoon]

How would Cybertronians react to fashion, seeing so many different styles? I know they alter their paint jobs, but it's still something to think about.

For example, imagine a Cybertronian has one human friend who dresses like an everyday person, while another human friend dresses in dark clothes or clothes with dark jokes printed on them (like me, hehe).

Or, what if one human constantly dresses formally no matter the setting, while another is almost always dressed comfortably? I wonder if they'd think it's similar to their paint jobs or if it'd be something else entirely.

Augh, I want to think about more things, but my head keeps hitting the wall! AAAAAAA

[transformers-racoon]

Imagine showing Cybertronians movies like The Last Unicorn or A Dog's Purpose and telling them that they're actually documentaries and not based on books and the like.

[transformers-racoon]

You think some Cybertronians get jealous at the amount of foods humans can eat while they're just stuck with energon?

[transformers-racoon]

I've seen a lot of headcanons of Cybertronians having a god-tier sense of smell (especially from the lovely Revelboo), so how would some react to human cooking?

I don't mean typical good-smelling foods like cakes and pies; I mean pungent foods, foods that use lots of garlic and onion (yummy) or ungodly amounts of spices.

To us, they smell amazing, but to Cybertronians, would it bother their olfactory sensors? Imagine a Cybertronian taking their human buddy home and deciding, "I'm going to stay the night here!" Maybe they're in disguise or just want to hang out, and the human buddy opens a window, or if it's a house like mine, a door, and the Cybertronian is just hit with the smell of food.

I like to think some would try to tough it out, maybe asking a few questions about the food, perhaps secretly judging their buddy, and others would just "Nope!" and leave immediately, gone the moment the human opens the window/door.

It's funny to think about since I also think those types of food smell good but also can't stay for long because my stomach will do a flip. God forbid someone wants to watch another person cook.

[transformers-racoon]

Imagine introducing Cybertronians to Gabriel Iglesias :3

[transformers-racoon]

You know those headcanons that depict fabric as scarce on Cybertron? I love those, I love seeing how some of the characters would react to human clothing, either with amazement or envy.

But imagine Cybertronians with a human friend who has hobbies or a job (like my aunt) involving weaving, sewing, quilting, etc., and receiving random gifts from them, like, "Hey, I made a mistake with this blanket, do you want it?" Or something similar.

How would they feel just getting random blankets or their human friend trying to make a Cybertronian-sized scarf or something similar? Just something made specifically for them that they wouldn't be able to get on Cybertron, especially if it's made in their colors or their favorite colors.

[transformers-racoon]

Have you ever thought about how Cybertronians probably wouldn't realize just how short our lifespans are until their first human buddy dies?

They don't realize that we live for 70-90 years (with some reaching 100+), and they think, "I'm going to go off-planet for a brief amount of time!" They leave their human buddy behind, only to come back and find them so much older, learning that their "brief journey" was 20-50% of their entire lifespan.

Do you think some Cybertronians would try to spend more time with humans, even if they know it'll just hurt them in the end? Maybe others would try to stay distant from these organic beings, even if they act almost identically to some Cybertronians.

For the Cybertronians that stayed, how would they feel seeing their human buddy getting older? For us, it takes a good amount of time to start graying, but for them? It's almost sudden.

As if just yesterday their human buddy was always wanting to come on adventures with them, show them around Earth, and so much more, but now? Now they can't do all of that; they have to take things slow. And their Cybertronian buddy knows that their human is nearing the end of their life. Maybe they'd stay right there with them; maybe some would want to leave, not having to see their friend die after seeing so much death.

Augh, I just need angst.

[transformers-racoon]

AAAAAAAAA

[raileurta]

Thinking of Optimus learning about Artemis two and all the humans' reactions to it and how hopelessly endeared by it he would be.

[transformers-and-taxa]

War weary cybertronian vs the indomitable joy and whimsy of apes in space

[transformers-racoon]

Imagine introducing Cybertronians to vanishing ink. If you don't know what I mean, it's ink that fades within a few seconds to a few minutes after being applied to something. How much chaos would be caused and how fast would it be banned?

[transformers-racoon]

Have you ever thought about how Cybertronians probably wouldn't realize just how short our lifespans are until their first human buddy dies?

They don't realize that we live for 70-90 years (with some reaching 100+), and they think, "I'm going to go off-planet for a brief amount of time!" They leave their human buddy behind, only to come back and find them so much older, learning that their "brief journey" was 20-50% of their entire lifespan.

Do you think some Cybertronians would try to spend more time with humans, even if they know it'll just hurt them in the end? Maybe others would try to stay distant from these organic beings, even if they act almost identically to some Cybertronians.

For the Cybertronians that stayed, how would they feel seeing their human buddy getting older? For us, it takes a good amount of time to start graying, but for them? It's almost sudden.

As if just yesterday their human buddy was always wanting to come on adventures with them, show them around Earth, and so much more, but now? Now they can't do all of that; they have to take things slow. And their Cybertronian buddy knows that their human is nearing the end of their life. Maybe they'd stay right there with them; maybe some would want to leave, not having to see their friend die after seeing so much death.

Augh, I just need angst.

[transformers-racoon]

How would Cybertronians feel about things like highway hypnosis? If you don't know, highway hypnosis or white line fever is an altered mental state where a driver can make safe and correct decisions while driving very long distances and usually has no recollection of making these decisions.

Like, how would a Cybertronian feel making trips with their human buddy and suddenly their buddy is just... silent? Like, yeah, their human friend is technically helping them along the road, i.e., keeping them from doing something stupid, but their human buddy isn't even talking.

And then minutes after they get to their destination, suddenly their human buddy is back to normal, acting like nothing is wrong and they didn't just go completely silent. But then when the Cybertronian friend brings it up, like, "Hey, you were abnormally quiet," or something similar, their human buddy doesn't even remember it at all.

Like, would they be very concerned or just act like that's another human thing? It's just something that I can't help but think about.

[transformers-racoon]

Have you ever thought about how Cybertronians would feel about how humans react to their own kind getting into space? They're a spacefaring race, so this stuff is common for them, but here are these little organic beings seeing space as a true wonder, cheering every time a mission is successful, and mourning when a mission isn't.

How would they feel when they learn about our failures? Sure, they've had their own, but seeing how humans constantly hold on to those memories, how they constantly try to honor people who were lost, and keeping those who were able to return close?

How would they feel about how life-changing missions like the Artemis II mission can be for our science when they already know how to colonize other planets?

How would they feel about us mourning the animals we first sent into space? How we gave sweet Laika the title of being the Patron Saint of One-Way Journeys? How would they feel about us being angry about how she was sent to die while they probably just used drones or something similar that they never grew attached to?

Artemis II has me feeling things. Well, it has been like that since I first watched the live stream when the crew launched, and then seeing the highlights of the crew and the flight just made me emotional, especially about the crater named Caroll. Though, the moment when the Nutella bottle flew by the camera had me dying. Also, if you somehow haven't yet, go check out some of the pictures that are finally coming in; they're beautiful.

Editing rq to add onto this, for the crater named Carroll (yes, I know technically it has to be allowed by the correct authority, but it will forever be Carroll), imagine the Cybertronians seeing how much humans love each other, so much that they would even name a crater on the moon after someone, as if to say, "I told you I'd give you the moon someday."

[transformers-racoon]

Do you ever think about the uncanny valley? We might think we'd be instantly enamored with Cybertronians, like how we are when we see them in comics, movies, and shows, but considering how the uncanny valley works, Cybertronians look so human in the face that they'd trigger it. I'm pretty sure it would immediately provoke a fight, flight, or freeze response. (Yes, I know the fourth response exists, but I'm not adding that here.)

Just imagine:

Any Cybertronian (probably Beachcomber): "Hey Optimus, look at the new organic species I found!"

Random human: *Fearful, feral noises*

Optimus: "I believe we have scared them."

The moment we see them, it would either be a fight on sight or a run. Or we'd just stand there like a deer seeing an 18-wheeler at full speed.

Some of you, I know, would end up like this clip "Pet the human? More like the human is trying to actively destroy your servos." Just, "FREE ME, YOU METAL HEATHEN, I WILL NOT TOLERATE THIS!"

And then you'd have people who would be held like some rag doll that they have no idea what to do with because the human literally just stared at them as if they had ZERO survival instincts. But that's just a natural response, and they don't know that. Like this PERFECTLY NORMAL human is now just sticking with some of them because the Cybertronians (most likely the Autobots) would be adopting the human whether they want it or not. You're their human now.