beep beep !

[trashfeared]

» INDEPENDENT ROLEPLAY BLOG FOR  𝑹𝑰𝑪𝑯𝑰𝑬 𝑻𝑶𝒁𝑰𝑬𝑹 OF STEPHEN KING'S 'IT' UNIVERSE. 

written & loved dearly by alex. 28. gmt based. they/them or he/him pronouns. also found @ batwirls & corignem. once upon a time richie was found @ trashedfear.

rules.

[trashfeared]

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[trashfeared]

find richie back on my multi @ corignem!

[trashfeared]

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[lucifersresources]

yungblud // self titled album rp meme.

edit/alter/change pronouns etc as you see fit!  

the funeral. 

i can’t leave my bed but i can’t sleep.

i smoke too much till i can’t breathe.

i’m emotional, i’ll always be.

i hate myself.

i hate myself, but that’s alright.

i love myself, but that’s alright.

i tell myself that it’s alright that i dream about the day i die.

there’s no one to blame.

i’ve been dancing at my funeral, waiting for you to arrive.

i was hoping you’d look beautiful.

i want a real fake smile but i hate my teeth.

i want to tell you that i love you, but i just can’t speak.

do you hate yourself?

do you love yourself?

i wanna prove my love before i leave.

i wanna make you come and scrape my knees.

want you to bite my tongue until i bleed.

we all hate ourselves, well that’s alright.

tissues. 

i feel left out. 

i feel let down. 

don’t you feel my heart go? 

everybody wants to feel love. 

everybody wants to be adored. 

i can’t keep holding my breath. 

god forbid you leave me like all the rest did. 

i’m in love again. 

tomorrow i’ll be sad again. 

i can handle the truth. 

i don’t want you to hide your issues. 

tell me you love me. 

memories. 

i wish i could just let go. 

every time i fall asleep, i know i’ll wake up alone. 

dreams of you wrap around my throat. 

i think i’m gonna choke. 

when i said forever, i meant forever. 

i wish i could just let go of the memories. 

i always thought i would make it right. 

now i’m stuck inside this shame instead. 

when my heart breaks just a little bit i wanna drop dead. 

i bury all the tragedy with sand. 

cruel kids. 

slow dance with me in traffic. 

i’d crash my automatic to spend time with you. 

i took too many drugs tonight. 

now i can’t hold myself upright. 

i know that you’ll be somewhere out there, suffering too. 

don’t leave me alone. 

don’t leave me alone, coz i won’t survive it. 

i know i don’t wanna do what the cruel kids do. 

i’d rather burn alive. 

i want a better life. 

art is dead. 

i’m guilty too. 

mad. 

i don’t think they understand. 

i know that i’m goin’ mad. 

all the colours start fading into white and black. 

you hurt your heart. 

‘it will be fine’ is a criminal lie. 

outta your sight and outta your mind ain’t where i wanna sit down and reside. 

all my life i’ve been so detached, unemotional. 

i fight myself so i’m less alone. 

i cry 2. 

evidently damaged from your last relationship. 

if you were sober, you wouldn’t call her a bitch. 

patch up your loneliness. 

i won’t tell if you don’t want me to. 

let’s keep it between us. 

i know you’re hurting. 

i know you’re hurting, but i know you’re getting through. 

it’s alright mate, i cry too. 

sweet heroine. 

they desert you in apathetic intervals. 

i need someone. 

i need someone who reminds me of sweet heroine. 

i won’t fall in love. 

i’m in control of it. 

i must admit, it really twisted me up. 

everything ain’t what it seems. 

i need something to sew me up by the seams again. 

sex not violence. 

i’m a mess for your amusement. 

i sit and cry in bed alone. 

do you really know me at all? 

i drown myself in aggravation. 

tell me all the secrets you’ve been hiding. 

wrap me up in new fixations. 

it’s all about sex, not violence. 

don’t go. 

i guess we’re all out of time. 

i don’t want you to go. 

cursing your name like i’m better alone. 

don’t ask me if i believe. 

i can’t fucking handle you falling in love with me. 

damage all around now, i guess it’s a part of me. 

i could run away, but there’s nowhere i’d rather be. 

so don’t go. 

i can’t hear all about how i’m losing my glow. 

don’t feel like feeling sad today. 

why are we sitting in silence? 

i been asking for some kind of guidance. 

i think i’m too late and i’m sinking now. 

i need somebody to pull me out. 

i don’t wanna go out today. 

don’t feel like feeling sad today. 

i wanna be right here, right by your side. 

better pull myself together. 

the politician ain’t gonna help you. 

gravity’s gonna bring you down. 

die for a night. 

pain is a language i can read. 

i know it’ll come out eventually. 

can you show signs of weakness asymptomatically? 

all i want is a cigarette. 

i always wonder what it would be like if i could die for a night. 

would anyone mind it?

i don’t know what i’m talking about. 

the boy in the black dress. 

masculinity seems to hurt a lot. 

you don’t want to lie. 

you don’t want to lie anymore about things that make you sad. 

he tried to be something that they all would adore. 

they hate what he is. 

they hate what he’s not. 

hate is nothing new. 

[lucifersresources]

deaf havana // the present is a foreign land rp meme.

edit/alter/change pronouns etc as you see fit!

pocari sweat. 

used to be my home.

now it’s a place i can’t afford.

it’s all my fault. 

you can’t really be homesick when your whole life is a mess. 

i dreamt that we fell to our deaths. 

i woke up alone and upset. 

coz i drink to forget. 

i’ve got nothing left. 

this is as low as it gets.

how the hell do i come back from this?

19dreams. 

it’s been a minute since we believed. 

i’ve been looking for ways to live. 

i’ve been knocked back. 

try to keep this alive. 

time ticks on, people die. 

some of us get suck in here, left behind. 

it leaves us to wonder where in hell life goes. 

we’re all getting jaded. 

i can’t help myself from wondering. 

are we chasing the same dreams i had when i was 19?

calm down, come down. 

try and pick your head up off the ground. 

time ticks on and life drives by. 

friends feel like a portrait of a different time. 

you had long hair and boundless hopes. 

i might feel dead to the world. 

it’s just another day. 

is this my time drawing close? 

i’ll find some other way to keep it going. 

i’ve been left to wonder where did my youth go? 

i put you through hell. 

i put you through hell.

i put you through hell, but don’t you know i was right there as well. 

i was right there. 

i’ve been down so many times. 

i’ve been thinking that i was the worst of us. 

i was never the first to trust myself. 

i could fuck things up. 

you’ve always had enough of my hell. 

i’m gone.

make it okay until the morning. 

i can only try to leave this piece of me behind. 

i don’t need reminding what i was like. 

i know i wasn’t right. 

is it all a waste of time? 

am i just chasing good trips that went bad?

nevermind. 

you were reliving the years you missed out on. 

i don’t believe in god. 

i don’t believe in god, so i ain’t got a shot at redemption. 

i ain’t got a shot at redemption. 

i fell out of love again. 

i fell out of love again. not with you, but with living in general. 

i lost a lot of friends. 

i’ve been on a losing streak. 

my heart’s made of stone. 

i can’t trust my own damn feet to show me the right way home. 

it’s been a hell of a year. 

i was living in a haze. 

i needed to get away. 

travelled miles to end up sleeping on your floor. 

i’m not sleeping well at all anymore. 

i see you in my dreams. 

but then you’re gone again. 

i can’t seem to shake you off. 

you’re everything to me, just like you’ve always been. 

on the wire. 

my love feels low. 

i guess it’s time to figure out. 

everything changes when the drugs run dry. 

there’s nothing between us.

there’s nothing between us, it’s just bottles and bags. 

i’ve been feeling older. 

fallen down so many times.

i’ve given up on moving higher. 

i never wanted to leave you. 

it’s done now. 

you don’t wanna believe me when i’m strung out. 

i’m getting tied up. 

thought i could balance on a line. 

i can change. 

i’ve lost faith and i can’t lose more. 

how could i survive? 

if i could get out from my past. 

trying/falling. 

is this hopeless? 

would i cope less somewhere new, without you?

i’ve been low less without you.

i feel new. 

i’m still open, tired, hoping i’ll make it through without you. 

i’m scared i’ve wasted all this time until now. 

where is the worth in these years?

maybe i’m not better, but i’m trying. 

i’ve been over-hung for too long. 

wake me up, i’ve been falling. 

someone/somewhere. 

i saw you from the train. 

you didn’t look a thing like i remembered. 

god what a mess i’m in. 

is this when the pain kicks in?

i broke down when we got back to your house. 

i shouldn’t have come here. 

but i can’t be alone. 

after all, we’re just strangers. 

this love is faithless. 

i found hell. 

all my demons stick around till the morning. 

the ghost of you was haunting me. 

i’ve been crying out.

i’m trying to focus on the positives. 

you break apart like porcelain. 

i can’t make you whole again. 

you don’t know the half of it, you never did. 

i can’t fix you. 

i didn’t want to meet the people that you knew. 

each glimmer of progress was drowned out by hopelessness. 

it filled my veins with fear.

i just wanted to run. 

outrun my youth. 

reverse the years of selfish sin. 

i’m done.

maybe in another life we would be nothing but passers by. 

you’re just someone, somewhere in the dark. 

help. 

feeling like i fell by the wayside. 

i can’t get back up. 

turning 31 doesn’t feel right. 

now it’s all done.

i should have chose sleep over staying up. 

i couldn’t find peace in the darkness. 

i numb the senses. 

who should i believe? 

i lost you.

am i dead or dreaming? 

i’m too low to be alone. 

my head is an ocean of misery. 

i’m hard to be around sometimes. 

you helped me to my feet again.

i was never there when you needed a friend. 

i’m drowning again.

please let me in. 

the present is a foreign land. 

i’ve been living in the present as a foreign land. 

i wanna take it all in.

i don’t see any future calling. 

you’re not getting younger. 

what’s time but pressure in a number? 

the past pummels me like an avalanche. 

time’s insidious disconnect eats away at me. 

i might find some other way. 

how can i reconcile this world that i don’t recognise? 

nothing ever seems familiar anymore. 

kids. 

what a pity to see the lives we let go of. 

we gave up too soon. 

the people around were the air that i breathed.

we could stay young forever. 

set fire to a cruel world. 

sometimes i wonder where you’ve been. 

i heard you got sober, moved away. 

someone died and you were never the same again. 

guess your time came and went. 

i’ll be alone forever. 

we were just kids. 

we know nothing. 

was it all in my mind? 

you can leave home, never look back. 

you might get lost from time to time. 

you’re still just a kid trying to survive. 

going clear. 

i don’t know what’s happening to me.

i do lines on the weekend.

don’t you say a prayer for me.

sometimes i pray i die in my sleep.

i lose time with my real friends.

i gave up before i tried.

maybe i could tell it was over.

i fall back behind my lies.

maybe i don’t wanna be sober.

you just get lost in the pages of the books you love.

inexpensive wine is keeping you numb for the mean time.

but the devil is calling me.

remember me. 

maybe i was a liar. 

i’ve been getting tired.

i don’t think i can get any higher.

we’ve expired. 

i really wanted to make it work.

i broke first.

it takes its toll. 

i’m losing touch. 

i can’t take it. 

i never wanted to be still here, just history. 

we were so blind. 

god, what we could have been. 

how will you remember me?

[trashfeared]

INDEPENDENT RICHIE TOZIER OF STEPHEN KING'S IT UNIVERSE. loved by alex.

[landeria]

Devon Bostik as Jasper Jordan | pt.3/? (1,2) The 100 (2014)

[trashfeared]

❛ are you jealous? want me all to yourself, do you? ❜ / stan // @moontched

brows twitch and for a moment, richie is filled with an urge to run. he doesn't get that way often with stan. after all the time together, it's kinda the complete opposite really. stan was the one person in life richie felt safe with. but... well. that didn't mean it came without complications.

and this one right here was a glaringly obvious one.

as he stares back at stan, he still feels it. running would mean he didn't have to speak. didn't have to be honest at all. could just avoid all of this. because-- well, it worked didn't it? what they had worked. richie couldn't go ruining it with his feelings and selfishness now, could he?

in the end, he straightens up, shrugs. takes another swig from his drink. "whatever. do what you want, stanley." gaze lingers though, richie's eyes moving slowly from stan's lips, up to his eyes again. "you know you'll be thinking about me the whole time though."

[trashfeared]

❛ you shouldn’t smoke, you know. ❜ // @kbrak

weak laugh escapes, though combined with the smoke it catches in richie's throat and he ends up coughing-- not really selling the whole should be smoking thing, huh?

he groans a little, giving a rough cough to clear it before he settles again, cigarette twiddling between fingers as he looks at eddie with a casual little grin. fondness perhaps in the curve of a smile.

"c'mon eds, i've done worse shit before. what's it gonna do, kill me?" he laughs, brows raising before he shrugs. "big deal."

[nightprompts]

&. 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐝, 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.

(  you  know  that  dynamic  of  the  emotionally  closed  off  one  &  the  kind  one  they  have  a  soft  spot  for?  yeah,  that’s  the  vibe.  )

said from the lone wolf.

❛ you think you know me, but the truth is, you don’t. ❜

❛ going home isn’t an option anymore. ❜

❛ i’m fine. there’s nothing for you to worry about. ❜ 

❛ do you wish i was different? ❜ 

❛ i just, i don’t want anything bad to happen to you. ❜ 

❛ you deserve better than what you’ve got. ❜

❛ i guess we both lost something we were fond of. ❜ 

❛ i’m not leaving you out here alone. ❜ 

❛ you don’t have to keep me company, i’m fine by myself. ❜ 

❛ coming here to see you is the only place i could go. ❜

❛ i’m afraid of losing you, okay? ❜ 

❛ i know you probably hate me right now, and i get it. ❜

❛ what is with your weird fascination with me? ❜ 

❛ yeah, you keep on telling yourself that bullshit. ❜ 

❛ i didn’t mean to hurt your feelings, i just have a lot on my plate. ❜ 

❛ you’re lucky you got away with only a scratch. ❜ 

❛ if i could be a different person, i promise you, i would be. ❜

❛ people like us don’t get to decide when we’re done. ❜

❛ i’ve never had anything good happen to me when i trusted others. ❜

❛ you won’t survive out there. they tear all good things apart. ❜

❛ i don’t know what’s the truth or what’s a lie anymore. ❜ 

❛ you got guts, i’ll give you that. ❜ 

❛ the more you know, the shorter your life will be. ❜ 

❛ for the first time in years, i felt something that i thought had been lost to me. ❜ 

❛ what you think you’re going through is nothing to what i have been through. ❜ 

said from the soft spot. 

❛ you’re not as bad as everyone says you are. ❜

❛ how is it that you’re never scared? ❜

❛ you think i’m weak because i’m not like you. ❜

❛ you wanted to be left alone, right? ❜ 

❛ how do you make the pain go away? ❜

❛ you shouldn’t smoke, you know. ❜

❛ destroy what is destroying you. ❜

❛ i hope you find the peace you’re searching for. ❜

❛ you know my door is always open to you. ❜

❛ i look at you and my heart breaks because all i see is loneliness. ❜

❛ you’re avoiding the subject and you know it. what are you hiding from me? ❜ 

❛ you’re not at war anymore, you can come home. ❜

❛ it feels like you’ve been avoiding me. ❜

❛ what are you so afraid of? ❜

❛ you shouldn’t be out here by yourself. ❜ 

❛ why do you care? you could have just walked away. ❜ 

❛ i know you. how else do you think i found you so easily? ❜

❛ if it was the other way around, would you have come back for me? ❜ 

❛ i just thought you’d like some company. ❜ 

❛ are you jealous? want me all to yourself, do you? ❜

❛ i knew you had a heart. ❜ 

❛ can you look at me? please? ❜

❛ i don’t think i’ve ever seen you smile. ❜

❛ if you won’t take care of yourself, then who will? ❜

❛ you have something beautiful inside of you. it’s hard for some people to tell, but it’s there. ❜

[lucifersresources]

as always, feel free to edit/alter to better fit!

“ every piece of me is made from what you did to me. ”

“ i couldn’t stop missing you if i tried. ”

“ death seems to follow me. ”

“ i can’t let go of this. ”

“ what if we tried again? ”

“ i don’t want to know what life is like without you. ”

“ you’re an impossible person to forget. ”

“ i didn’t think i’d see you again. ”

“ i don’t think i’m built for forever. ”

“ sometimes you break in places that can’t be fixed. ”

“ stay, just for tonight. ”

“ once in a while, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a fairy tale. ”

“ her/his/their/your angel eyes see the good in many devils. ”

“ you can’t go back and change the beginning. ”

“ you can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending. ”

“ every atom of me missed him/her/them/you. ”

“ destroy what destroys you. ”

“ your eyes stole all my words away. ”

“ you are someone too. ”

“ be kind, but don’t forget that you deserve kindness too. ”

“ we deserve a soft epilogue, my love. ”

“ darling, you are not at war. ”

“ darling, you are not at war with anyone but yourself. ”

“ i want kingdoms to tremble when they hear my name. ”

“ teach me how to be a monster. ”

“ some things have to end for better things to begin. ”

“ never feel guilty for starting again. ”

“ i’ll be there when your heart is ready. ”

“ if someone makes you feel, let them. ”

“ there is true magic in you. ”

“ choose people who choose you. ”

“ soulmates aren’t just lovers. ”

“ you drew memories in my mind i could never erase. ”

“ the person you loved was an illusion. ”

“ people leave you out in the cold and get mad when you learn how to get warm by yourself. ”

“ your name hurts. ”

“ grieving someone who still lives might be the worst pain. ”

“ you’re just a stranger with all my secrets. ”

“ i think we were meant to be, but we did it wrong. ”

“ how could you possibly let go of someone that felt like home? ”

“ a part of me still thinks that if i can find the right words, it will save us. ”

“ whatever we are, i still remember the way we were. ”

“ as long as you still love it, it will continue to break you. ”

“ you made it look so damned easy to leave me. ”

“ i still find pieces of you in me. ”

“ perhaps not forgetting you is the only forever we will ever have. ”

“ you and i will always be unfinished business. ”

“ hell exists. it’s here, 3am, awake and without you. ”

“ i regret the end, the way we couldn’t leave one another without wounds. the way we made it seem as if all the love we shared was just wasted time. ”

“ you can forgive yourself now. ”

[yakuza-0]

…And then there’s Joaquin. He’s like the horny best friend from a 90s teen movie. Following you around, saying all your unfiltered thoughts.

[trashfeared]

tag drop part two.

[trashfeared]

tag drop part one.

[trashfeared]

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