Practical Magic

pixel skylines
Xuebing Du
Jules of Nature
DEAR READER
macklin celebrini has autism
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
h
ojovivo
cherry valley forever

titsay

blake kathryn
Game of Thrones Daily
dirt enthusiast

Love Begins
No title available

oozey mess
taylor price

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
wallacepolsom

seen from Poland
seen from United States
seen from Mexico

seen from Germany
seen from Belgium
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from Germany

seen from Peru

seen from Türkiye
@travelwritelove
Practical Magic
So apparently men’s crop tops were a thing during the 80s…
EDIT: More of THE CROP TOP SERIES
#teaser
Prey Teaser #2 (Chapter Six Excerpt)
Fell’s Hollow Daily
July 11th, 1945
Tunnel Deconstruction Update
After innumerable cases of missing people, the town has called for a closing of all access points in the subterranean tunnel system. The tunnels were constructed in 1879 with the aim of turning Fell’s Hollow into a trading mecca, but the project was halted by Caleb Fell and Stefan Danvers when their immigrant workers kept going missing under questionable circumstances. The situation grew increasingly dire until it culminated in the death of the project head, Mr. Gabriel Frederick Dayne. The tunnel project was then abandoned and the passageways have since languished unfinished underneath our seaside town for decades.
However, a recent uptick in disappearances prompted an outcry from the people of Fell’s Hollow, demanding that the city board up every access and exit to the tunnels once and for all. The city wants to stress that there is no proof that what happened in 1879 is happening again, and moreover, any after hours events taking place in those abandoned tunnels are against not only the city’s moral code but also the curfew requirement.
This argument from the city was met with criticism of fear-mongering and further suppressing the rights of the town’s more progressive residents. Tensions ran high on both sides of the debate, but ultimately the city decided that no matter the type of person going missing, the tunnels were a menace all the same.
City leaders finally relented and assembled a rather motley crew of primarily women and men unfit for combat for one reason or another to seal up any and all points of egress below the city. Despite the move, Fell’s Hollow leaders issued a statement insinuating that they still believed that most of these alternative lifestyle citizens who have gone missing had probably just chosen to move to a bigger city which might better suit their needs.
A few weeks later, Fell’s Hollow city leaders issued a second statement announcing that the tunnel project had been completed, and that the passageways had been adequately sealed off. However, rumors have surfaced from those tasked with this undertaking that some of the workers went missing during the project, and because of this fact, the sealing of the tunnels was left incomplete as it was deemed too perilous to continue.
Fell’s Hollow stands by its declaration that the project was successfully, without any corners cut, and anyone who has gone missing recently has probably just ‘skipped town’. Their official position is that Fell’s Hollow is safe again and the tunnels underneath the city are no longer accessible.
Prey Prologue Teaser (Penultimate Draft Version)
January 16th, 2011
The Inverness Adventure Blog
Hello once again, my intrepid and curious readers. To all of my compatriots fascinated by the shadows of our world and minds, it is with a heavy heart that I must announce that I will be stepping down from this blog for the indefinite future.
While it has been my honor to share with you my experiences delving into the dark underbelly of our ethereal coastal town and its infamous gothic university these past three years, it is no longer feasible for me to continue to do so. Despite being equally prestigious academic institutions, Inverness School of Law is proving much more time-consuming than Inverness University, and I no longer have the time to dedicate to chasing down the ghosts and creatures of Fell’s Hollow lore and bringing those stories to you lovely readers every month.
I know that for the past several months I have hinted at a new theory and project I have been working on in secret that would really get to the bottom of why there are so many weird tales associated with our idyllic yet constantly misted- in seaside town. I had been hoping to present my findings to you all soon, but unfortunately, that work has hit a dead end.
I never like to use the word “never” so you might see me around the graveyard or posting again here in the future. But for the time being, I want you to say thank you from the bottom of my weird heart for your loyal readership. It felt like I was taking you all with me every time I dragged my friends along to track down a werewolf or get to the bottom of the rumors of Inverness Library’s rumored secret rooms or whatever crazy adventure we had our sights set on that week. Your support these past years has been invaluable to building my confidence as a writer, turning what started as just an experience recapping experiment between friends into a local legend & lore-loving blog for the whole university community and beyond.
Thank you all, and best of luck in your own creepy endeavors, whatever they may be.
Never stop searching the shadows, never stop chasing the night.
Yours forevermore,
Riley Dayne
Prologue
Last Bonfire Night
September 30th, 2011
Riley’s gaze transcended the flames to scour the length of the beach from the crashing waves to the shadows cast by the looming emerald trees to the towering cliffs that eclipsed both sides of the small bay, searching as she always did for something—anything—to move in the shadows.
“He raised up his arm and brought talons sharp as daggers down across her soft underbelly, a spray of crimson coating everything as guts and organs—”
The sound of a growl ripped through the night air and the body next to Riley lurched and shrieked. She jumped on instinct with outstretched arms, ready to help her best friend when the sound of laughter cut through the surge of adrenaline.
When her eyes rested on the culprit she rolled them and settled back into her spot.
“Matt! God, you’re so immature!” The tall girl whined, as her boyfriend loosened his arms from where he had grabbed her and, instead, snaked them around her broad shoulders.
Matt laughed, and squeezed Jessica tight, settled in behind her, “It never gets old.”
He turned to hi-five John, but the burly blond just shook his head at his rowdy friend’s antics, before raising his hand half-heartedly because John was too polite to completely deny anybody.
Kyle cleared his throat, eager to resume his position as Storyteller General. Riley’s heart constricted, but she swallowed it down and focused her attention on Kyle. She missed the days when she was the default storyteller of the group.
“As I was saying, her insides exploded onto the muddy, leaf-strewn forest floor, soaking the detritus in—”
“Wait a second, Kyle, so in this version, The Creature has talons for hands?” John interrupted.
“Yup. Because it’s my version. Plus, he’s gotta be called ‘The Creature’ for a reason. I’ll bet 15 years ago the police let some detail slip to the public that wasn’t supposed to get out, and that’s how the name was created. So I’m going to infuse some imagination into this tired tale. It’s my prerogative.”
Kyle looked around the group to see if he was going to get any more lip. When no one spoke up, he resumed his post but just as he opened his mouth to speak, Matt interrupted.
“Not that I don’t like your version Kyle, but I think we’re all dying to hear someone else tell this tale.”
Riley looked at Matt, confused. Matt usually was the biggest proponent of Kyle’s crazy take on local legends. It gave him more fodder with which to prank the group.
Matt shot a loaded gaze back at her and raised his eyebrows in a challenge. “How about it, Riley? Or should I say, Mistress of the Inverness Adventure Blog?”
He flashed a wicked smile in her direction, but Riley had already rounded on her best friend.
“Jessica! You told him?”
“No, I — well, not exactly,” the tall girl stammered, shrinking back into her boyfriend’s chest.
“Don’t blame her, Riley. She mentioned that you had quite the infamous blog back in college and I was the one who put two and two together. I mean, your site was just as famous at my campus as it was at Inverness.”
“He’s not lying,” said Kyle.
“It was popular at mine, too,” John agreed.
Riley didn’t know if she should feel flattered or embarrassed over her failed writing experiment. On one hand, it bolstered her confidence to know how large her following had grown over the three years. On the other hand, it just meant more eyes witnessing her failure.
“So… how about it? Will you rouse your Inverness Adventure prowess for one final performance? It is the last Bonfire Night of the year, after all. Telling tall tales and recounting local legends is the whole point of this night, and you’re the closest thing this group has to an expert in that category. No offense, Kyle.” Matt threw the last part in as an afterthought when Kyle’s hand fluttered dramatically to his chest, complimented by a wounded look on his face.
Riley sighed and looked around at her group of friends. She was dying to take the reigns again, and that was exactly why she shouldn’t do it.
She shook her head. “Thanks but I don’t think so. I want to hear Kyle finish his story.”
John, Jessica, and Kyle dropped the subject instantly, as though they had had this conversation before, and were resigned to its inevitable conclusion. But Matt’s speculative stare remained fixed on Riley a few beats longer. She ignored him, and eventually, he dragged his gaze away from her and turned back to Kyle, who was now acting out The Creature feasting on the mangled body of the dead co-ed.
Riley was also looking at Kyle, but her mind was somewhere else. She should have known it was just Matt behind the adrenaline-spiking scare. For all its ethereal beauty and bounty of spine-tingling urban lore, Riley’s life in Fell’s Hollow was depressingly mundane. Her law school friends didn’t seem to mind this fact, however. They seemed perfectly content to get their fill of thrills on these late summer/early fall nights recounting local legends at the sea’s edge. They never seemed to crave more.
Riley sighed again as she looked past the flames to the ocean beyond. Cliffs rose up on either side of the beach and dense, jade giants pressed in on all sides. Riley stared hard at the frothing waves, wishing for Kyle’s tales even in the smallest sense, to turn prophetic. She’d do anything for some kind of magic, mystery, or adventure to spring forth from the darkness, and finally rouse her from her academic drudgery-induced slumber.
The musky and faintly sweet aroma of burnt cedar and smoke crashed into Liam like a wave as he made his way down the dark path that led to the beach. He would have gone back to his car for a flashlight but the glow from the bonfires seeped through the edges of the dark woods, providing a semblance of illumination on an otherwise moonless night.
As Liam stepped out of the trees and onto the soft white sand, he took in the revelry before him. Despite the boisterous laughter and enticing scene of free-flowing booze and the usually uptight law students letting down their hair in a rare display of reckless abandon, Liam couldn’t help but wonder what he was doing here. After all, he wasn’t a law school student, and despite Fell’s Hollow being his hometown, his life felt eons away now.
There was a part of Liam that regretted letting Matt talk him into coming tonight. But he also knew that he hadn’t seen his college roommate in months, and if all went to plan, Liam’s life would only get more crazy and chaotic—meaning even less time to keep up with friends and family.
No, Liam was happy to finally see Matt again. And the law school students were nice enough, he supposed. A little too studious and buttoned-up, in his opinion, but what else would you expect? Liam smiled at the thought of these kids coming to a real party with his crowd. Talk about mixing oil and water.
The reminder of his world sent a wave of stress through his mind. As much as he wanted to see his friend, he hated that he had to cancel a rehearsal for this. The guys didn’t seem to mind, but Liam did. They were so close to making it. All they had to do was keep their eye on the prize for just a bit longer. A few months… maybe a year. And of course, once they made it, well, there wouldn’t be any rest for a long time. They would ride this wave as fast and as far as they possibly could.
Because that’s what you did when you made it big in Liam’s world. People sell their souls for that level of infamy.
A crash of foaming water against the soaked shoreline snapped Liam back to the present. He scanned the beach and took a rare moment to remind himself of the dark beauty of his hometown. He had spent so much time trying to make a better, bigger life for himself than the one he had in Fell’s Hollow, but he couldn’t deny that the small seaside town had its own charm and allure. Hell, it had been seductive enough to draw his dad here all those years ago, despite the grandiosity of life on the other side of a rising star.
Evidently that allure—and that of Liam and his mom—wasn’t enough to make his dad stay long. Liam’s brow furrowed as a familiar sensation shot through his chest. He felt his teeth gnash as he clenched his jaw to bite back the memories, pushing them back to the deepest corners of his mind, and burying them once again, as was necessary.
Man, he really needed a drink. He wanted to find Matt, get one of those red solo cups, and just let himself forget for a while. Despite his deep ambitions, forgetting was something at which Liam excelled.
“Hey, Liam! Over here!”
Liam made his way across the sand, weaving around the various bonfire circles. It was probably a fire hazard to have this many on one beach, but it was a time-honored tradition in Fell’s Hollow. And if there was one thing this town took seriously, it was the importance of history.
When Liam reached his friend, they embraced. It had been too long. Matt pulled away and turned to introduce Liam to the rest of the group. Kyle greeted him with their handshake from college, but the rest were strangers to him. A sturdy-looking, at least 6’3” or 6’4” guy with blond hair and a wide, white smile stepped forward and shook his hand.
“Hi, I’m John. It’s nice to meet you.” Liam nodded and returned the sentiment. He had heard a lot about John, and from what he could surmise, he was the nice guy foil to his mischievous childhood friend.
A girl almost as tall as he and Matt threw her arms around him, and said in a higher-pitched voice that didn’t seem to match her size, “Hi Liam! I’m Jessica. I’ve heard so much about you! It’s so nice to meet you.” She gave him a squeeze while speaking a mile a minute.
“Hi Jessica, it’s nice to finally meet you. I’ve heard a lot about you as well.”
Jessica blushed and smiled happily at Liam’s response, not realizing he was lying. He probably would have heard more about Jessica had he been a more attentive friend these last several months. He vaguely remembered giving Matt a hard time about not meeting anyone new if he decided to return to their hometown for graduate school, but he didn’t mind eating crow on this one. It was nice to see his notoriously rowdy friend get serious about a girl for once.
The last person stepped forward then, extending a hand. Liam received quite a hearty handshake from her, which surprised him.
“I’m Riley. It’s nice to meet you. What’s your story?”
What’s my story? Liam thought. How strange.
Something about the way she looked at him, with intense eyes that seemed to simultaneously size him up and also challenge him, took him off guard and the question lingered in the air for a few beats longer than was comfortable.
Finally locating his tongue, he said “Uh, well, Matt and I grew up together and the three of us, “ he indicated to include Kyle, “went to the same college in the city.”
Riley’s amber eyes searched his, as though she knew there was more he wasn’t revealing. Liam knew had been vague, but people never usually cared enough to push him on his intentionally surface-level responses. That was something he counted on.
She studied him with genuine curiosity, and she didn’t stop even when the others made to take up their seats around the fire again. Liam shifted uncomfortably under the weight of her scrutiny. He kept his walls up for a reason. And despite often being the center of attention of many attractive women, something about the way this beautiful brunette looked at him took him completely off guard. Her lips crooked up to one side in a wry smile, as though just by looking at him, she had found the answer to her question, and in the next instant, she was sitting back down in the sand, as though the strange moment between the two of them had never occurred.
Liam shook his head, trying to regain his bearings. Maybe it hadn’t occurred. Maybe he was just imagining it. She was incredibly attractive after all, and her appeal was only amplified by the glow of the fire dancing across her tanned skin and the reflection of the flames in her thick hair rendering it almost burgundy. She laughed at something Jessica said, and Liam caught a glimpse of glittering white teeth and the kind of sheer warmth behind her smile that could bring back to life even the blackest of hearts.
Jesus, get a grip. Maybe he just needed to get laid. He and the guys had been working so hard lately. That was it. He just needed a little more socialization to get his head on straight.
Liam scanned the group and realized the only spot left in the circle was in between Riley and John. His mind warred with his body, but his feet carried him over to the spot in seconds, making the victor of that particular battle all too clear.
“Ok, where were we, before I was so rudely interrupted? Ah yes,” Kyle began with mock dramatic flair, preparing to dive into another of the many in the cannon of urban legends possessed by Fell’s Hollow.
“Wait a second, Kyle, Liam needs a drink and most of us could do with a refill. Hold that thought for a second.” Matt extricated his arms from around Jessica and stood up.
Before Liam could offer to help, John stood up and the two boys headed to where a group was gathered at the center of the bonfires circles.
Liam wondered what to do with himself until Matt and John got back when Jessica gasped and yanked at Riley’s arm, “Oh my gosh, they’re here!”
Riley pitched over to the side and on instinct, Liam reached out to grab her and pull her back upright. She smiled at him, “Thank you,” before turning her attention back to her overly exuberant friend.
“Get some chill, Jess, for Pete’s sake. Who is here?”
“Grayson and Woolfe!” Kyle piped up, evidently on the same level as Jessica in terms of excitement.
“Why would Professor Grayson and Dean Woolfe be at a law school party?” Riley asked, scanning the fire-strewn beach, attempting to locate the pair.
“Who cares? All that matters is they are here and they are hot!”
“Here we go.”
“Come on, Riley. Don’t be such a stick in the mud! Grayson is only in his 30’s and Dean Woolfe can’t be more than 45 tops. They’re young faculty, not alien life forms,” Kyle stated, and Liam had the distinct impression it wasn’t the first time he’d had this argument with Riley.
“Who cares how old they are? They’re gorgeous!” Jessica feigned swooning and they all laughed.
Liam was a little taken aback to hear his best friend’s girlfriend moon so openly over other men, but he frankly didn’t care enough to register it as anything more than unusual.
As though reading his mind, Riley shot her friend a pointed look, indicating her head ever so slightly in Liam’s direction.
“Oh! I mean, not that it matters anyway. Like, they’re on the faculty. They’re out of reach. Not that I would reach for them at all!”
“Oh boy, ok Jessica. I think it’s time we take that shovel out of your hands now.”
Jessica’s brow furrowed and her eyes narrowed at Kyle.
“You’re digging your own grave, babe,” Kyle explained, rolling his eyes. But his smile belied the fact that he was certainly enjoying the spectacle.
Liam shrugged, “Don’t stop on my account. I have no idea who you’re talking about anyway.”
Before he could react, though he’s not sure what he would have done differently, Riley leaned in close and pointed out two men drinking beers and talking to a group of students near the coolers where Matt and John were currently scrounging around for more drinks.
“See over there? That’s our criminal law and criminal procedure professor, Grayson Harvey. He has us call him by his first name because he’s the ‘cool professor’.” Riley flashed her mega-watt smile at Liam when she said it, so he could share in on the joke with her, before amending, “Actually, Grayson is a really nice guy, and much more relatable than the rest of the faculty. He’s pretty much everyone’s favorite professor. Some more than others, certainly.” She swung her head around to fix a pointed look at Jessica. The tall girl rolled her eyes and pushed Riley’s shoulder away from her, and Riley laughed and nudged her back.
“And that other guy over there,” Liam picked up the train of conversation, surprising himself with how much he enjoyed feeling included by Riley, “That’s your Dean?”
“Yup. Dean Woolfe. He’s got about three first names, but I never remember their order. Not that it matters because he goes by his last name like the rest of the faculty.”
“Chase Michael,” Jessica piped up.
“Excuse me?”
“Chase Michael Woolfe. That’s his full name.” Jessica had clearly recovered from the embarrassment of her crushes being called out by her friends. “It’s only two names, stop making him out to be so weird!”
Riley smirked but didn’t say anything.
“Anyway,” continued her bubbly friend, “I wanted to tell you guys earlier but—” her eyes flickered briefly to where Matt was getting drinks and then back to the group, “—I guess now is the perfect time. Guess who the Dean’s newest intern is?”
“What? Oh my god!” Kyle’s eyes went wide and his mouth dropped open as he stared at Jessica.
“Wait, you’re interning for the Dean? Doing what precisely?” Riley asked.
“Well, I’m not exactly his intern. I’m interning in the administration office, as a way to pay them back for the financial aid. But my desk is right outside the Dean’s office, so guess who will be at his beck and call should he ever need anything?” Jessica wagged her eyebrows at Kyle, and the two erupted into manic giggles.
“Oh jeez,” Riley said under her breath, and Liam couldn’t help but laugh.
“So I take it you’re not as uh… impressed with the two of them as Jessica is?”
“No,” she laughed. “They don’t have quite the same effect on me as they do on Jess.”
“Why not?”
“Oh, I don’t know. I guess taboo isn’t really my thing.”
Liam shrugged. “It’s not that taboo. You’re all consenting adults, after all.”
“Hmm, I guess you got me there. Are you sure you’re not a law school student?”
Liam didn’t say anything, waiting for her to answer his original question.
“Well, I guess they’re just not my type.”
Liam glanced over at the two men. They were definitely older than the majority of the students there that night, but not so much so that they seemed out of place. Even as a straight male, Liam could see that both were objectively attractive, and the crowd of female students forming around them was only confirmation of that fact. The younger of the two was dressed more relaxed in loose-fitting joggers and a matching sweatshirt. He had coffee-colored skin and dark brown hair with sun-bleached streaks. If Liam didn’t know better, he would have pegged him for a surfer who probably modeled on the side to make ends meet. There were a lot of those in these beachside towns.
The older, light-skinned guy was dressed in a three-piece suit, completely out of place for the beach setting. His hair fell somewhere in between brown and blonde, but it was his piercing eyes that stood out to Liam the most. It was probably just a trick of the shadows, but they seemed darker than they should have been giving his otherwise light complexion. Both men were athletically built and taller than the average, although the younger one had at least an inch if not two on his friend and was more jacked as well. Liam had a hard time believing Riley wasn’t into either of these guys.
“Seriously? You don’t find them attractive?”
“Eh…” she shrugged.
“What is your type, then?”
For the first time that evening, Liam could swear he saw Riley’s cheeks redden, and she tripped over the words that followed.
“Oh, uh… I don’t know.” She cleared her throat, her discomfort becoming even more apparent. And Liam had to wonder at the reason for the slip in her mask of confidence.
“Oh puh-lease,” Kyle intoned from across the bonfire. “Riley has a type, for sure. She likes guys who are average height, 5’10 to 6 ft. Light skin, dark brown hair, warm eyes. She likes well-groomed facial hair, but not a full beard or mustache. Thick hair, but not too long. And athletic and down for the random spontaneous adventure, because Lord knows she needs someone who can keep up with her.”
“Hmmm… Kyle, I think you described someone sitting in this circle perfectly. Although that last bit remains to be seen,” Jessica piped up, shooting a smug look at Riley.
“Okay guys, that’s enough.” Riley glared at her friends. “He gets it.”
Kyle stuck a tongue out at her and Riley playfully tossed an empty red cup at him.
“Sorry about that,” she said, turning her attention back to Liam. “They can get a little carried away when they drink.”
Liam didn’t know what to make of the playful display between the friends, but he didn’t have a lot of time to figure it out as just then John and Matt returned, parceling out their loot to everyone in the circle.
Liam took a deep swig from his drink. He glanced sideways at Riley and took another one. He was going to have to watch himself around her tonight. Best to blunt any budding emotions with alcohol. He couldn’t afford another crush right now, or worse, a commitment to anything that wasn’t his career. He was too close to making it. He wasn’t about to jeopardize everything he had worked so hard for over alluring amber eyes and an adorable crooked smile. Or at least, that’s what he told himself. Because every time those eyes and that smile were fixed on him, he felt his pulse quicken and a pull below his stomach that indicated differently.
“So, you two have something in common,” Matt said, and Liam and Riley glanced up to see who he was talking about before realizing he was pointing at the two of them.
“What’s that?” Riley asked with a wariness Liam very much empathized with.
“You’re both very deeply entwined with the lore of our strange little town.”
Liam tensed, unsure where Matt was headed with this particular conversation. Matt knew Liam liked to keep his history under wraps whenever possible. What was he playing at?
Riley looked questioningly from Matt to Liam, “What is he talking about?”
Matt smiled gleefully at Liam and Liam threw a mock punch at his friend’s arm, which successfully got him to back off and turn his attention back to his girlfriend while he rubbed the spot Liam had just hit.
“Uhh… you go first.”
“Okay.” Riley glanced around at her friends before answering, but they were all distracted in their own side conversations.
“It’s kind of silly, but back in college, I had this… umm… adventure blog. I’ve always had kind of a weird fascination with the supernatural, and so when I came to Inverness University in the infamous Fell’s Hollow well… It started out as me dragging my friends along on random adventures, chasing down local legends. You know, all the stories we tell on nights like this.”
“Like, the satanic cults that perform human sacrifices in the woods? Or the vampires that live in the Baird Building on campus? And let’s not forget all the lost treasure scattered about the buried ruins off Shipwreck Cove.”
Riley cocked her head to the side and gave Liam the once over. “So we do have that in common. Familiarity with the weird history of Inverness and Fell’s Hollow.”
Liam laughed. “Yeah, I suppose you could say that. I actually remember your blog. You had quite the following even on my college campus. What made you stop?” He had no idea that she was the one behind that blog. He was even more impressed and confused by her than before.
He examined her more closely and saw that her hair wasn’t just tinged red by the firelight, but the deep brunette was punctuated by shifts of light that glowed buy and amethyst. Pieces of the puzzle that was Riley started to fall into place. Riley was a rebel. Maybe she wasn’t just another straight-laced lawyer-to-be. Maybe they did have more in common than he originally thought.
Riley’s gaze shifted away from Liam and she exhaled, eyes searching the darkness, as though trying to find the right words.
“So many of the legends I tracked down turned out to be nothing.”
“But you were still able to make an interesting read of the journey,” Liam pointed out.
“Thank you. I appreciate that. But I just—wanted it to be something more. I wanted to make a career out of it. And I got this crazy idea that— you know what? Forget it?”
“No, tell me. What was your idea?”
She sighed again. “I don’t know. I just had this hunch that even though I was coming up with nothing, there was something more there. Like, all of the tall tales were just a distraction. Obviously with the exception of The Creature.”
At the mention of the name, a lump formed in Liam’s throat. He stayed quiet until it passed and Riley took his silence as her cue to continue.
“I guess I just thought that if I could figure out this—secret history of Inverness and Fell’s Hollow, then maybe I’d have something I could make a career out of.”
“You mean, you wanted to be an author of actual books?”
“Basically, yes.”
“But now you’re in law school?”
Riley shrugged. “I never found my story. Besides, even if I did, do you know how hard it is to make it in a field like that?”
In fact, Liam did know, but again, he stayed silent.
“Eventually I had to accept the fact that me getting to go on adventures and write about them, as much as I loved the idea, was just a pipe dream. I had to get serious about my life and my career. I mean, I got into a school like Inverness for a reason. I couldn’t just ignore my potential, and the doors that kind of education could open.”
“Hence law school?”
“Yeah. Hence law school.”
Riley smiled at Liam, but he noticed that this time, it didn’t quite reach her eyes. He wanted to push her more on this topic, but then she asked, “So? What about you? What’s your tie to our lovely town’s sordid history?”
It was his turn now, and he had to focus on his response so as not to reveal too much.
“I—uhh, well…” Liam racked his brain for the most superficial yet truthful response he could think of. The one that gave the least away. “Honestly, I think Matt’s just getting carried away. My family has been in Fell’s Hollow for a long time. And when we were kids, my group of friends, including Matt, let our imaginations run wild concerning my family and Fell’s weird past. That’s basically it.”
“Why did they or you as a kid think that your family had anything to do with Fell’s Hollow’s past?”
Liam sighed and shook his head at the memory, “Honestly, it’s kind of ridiculous.”
“Well, I just told you that for the past few years I’ve spent the bulk of my free time chasing down myths and monsters and writing stories about them. So, quid pro quo.”
Liam rolled his eyes at the legalese, but couldn’t help but laugh, “Ok fine, but when I say it, you’ll recognize how ludicrous it sounds.”
“Try me.”
“I’ve always been really close with my uncle, my dad’s brother. My dad wasn’t around a lot growing up, so he stepped in as kind of a surrogate father. Sometimes he’d help my mom watch me when she was busy with work. So one day he was over at our house to keep an eye on me and my best friend, Brad. We were 11 and swore up and down to my mom that we didn’t need a babysitter, but my uncle said he wasn’t there to watch us, he had work to do going through some old family boxes in the attic that my dad had left behind.
“Brad and I thought it was just a lie but pretty soon we heard some banging around upstairs and became curious enough to climb up the ladder and pop our heads over the edge to see what my uncle was up to. He was holding this wood box that had a very peculiar drawing—or carving, I guess.
“We asked him what the box was and instead of saying, ’Nothing’ like most adults do when kids bug them about random things, my uncle looked at the box and then looked at me. And he said, ‘I’ll tell you when you’re older. It has to do with our legacy. The Al—this family takes its history seriously. Never forget that.’” Liam had to catch himself, almost giving away too much already.
“Brad and I had laughed at first assuming my uncle was just pulling our legs. But when he didn’t smile back, it kind of weirded us out and we headed back downstairs. Brad and I had always been nerds. We read horror and sci-fi and fantasy books, and loved Star Wars and Indiana Jones so it wasn’t long before our imaginations ran a little wild. Brad swore up and down that my family must be tied to some of the weird legends floating around town. And that’s basically it. Matt was in our group of friends at the time, so he heard about the story and Brad’s theory. I’m guessing that’s what he was referring to.”
It wasn’t the whole story—not by a long shot— but it was as much as Liam cared to divulge at the moment. He only hoped she’d accept his explanation.
“Well, I think that’s a cute story. Kind of cool, too. I wish I came from a family with a ‘legacy’. I mean, clearly, I’m not one to throw stones. I tried to chase down the ghosts of this area as an adult.”
If Riley only knew the legacy he had been saddled with, but Liam tucked the thought away.
“Yeah, I guess that makes you an even bigger dork than I am.” Liam smiled, flashing Riley a teasing look. She playfully punched into his shoulder in return.
“So, you never happened to stumble upon any sort of secret history when your uncle finally told you what was in the box?”
He cleared his throat, “Umm, no. Actually, he never did tell me what was in that box. Weird, right?”
Liam knew that Fell’s Hollow and the elite institution it housed kept a lot of secrets, more than just the contents of his uncle’s box, and those secrets were buried as deep as his own guilt over what happened all those years ago.
Because if Liam had never been so caught up in getting to the bottom of those secrets, then maybe his best friend would still be alive.
Liam looked at Riley again. She smiled back at him, but he could see the longing in her eyes. She would probably kill to know the things Liam knew about Fell’s Hollow & Inverness University. It might even help her find the story she was looking for, and then maybe she’d get to pursue her passion as opposed to boring law school.
It surprised Liam how much he wanted to be the one to give that to her. He couldn’t explain the strange affinity he had for her. It was like, they’d met before. In a way, he felt like he knew her for years. But that had to be just the alcohol talking.
He had the sudden urge to tell her everything. She’d throw her arms around him, and her smile and eyes would be all warmth again.
But he knew he couldn’t. Some ghosts were best left unearthed, and that included those that haunted him, his family, the university, and this town.
“Hey, Riley! Looks like your stalker is here,” Matt cut in. But this time, Liam was glad for the interruption.
Riley looked annoyed but unfazed. “I know,” she replied softly.
He noticed the change in her demeanor and sat up a little straighter, pulling away from the dark thoughts and refocusing on the here and now.“Hey, are you ok? What are they talking about?”
“It’s nothing. Just a guy I went on a few dates with, who can’t seem to take a hint.”
“Are you sure?” Liam seemed concerned, and Riley felt another surge of warmth fill her center. She didn’t know much about Liam, but she liked this strange boy with equal measures fire and sadness in his eyes.
“I’m sure. It’ll blow over soon enough.”
The truth was, Riley could not figure out why it hadn’t blown over already, and that worried her. But she didn’t want to talk about it in front of Liam. He was the cutest boy she’d met in years, and he was kind of weird, just like her.
Riley had tried hard to bury the memories of the last three years pertaining to her blog and strange adventures. She had told herself there was nothing more to be found there, and she was merely chasing delusions of grandeur.
And even though Liam seemed to agree that there was nothing worth finding amid the various lore surrounding Fell’s Hollow, there was something about meeting him tonight that filled her with a sense of excitement and possibility. The same kind she used to feel before setting out on a new adventure.
Jake, by contrast, made her feel the opposite of spontaneous, and Riley knew he was here the same way she always was aware of his presence. She could feel the eyes on her as tangibly as a breath on her neck. He always seemed to be there, just watching her.
But tonight, she didn’t want to think about any of that. Not while she was sitting on the beach with Liam and her friends, with no end of alcohol at their disposal. The school year would be in full swing soon, and Riley wouldn’t have many more opportunities like this to have some pure unadulterated fun.
She threw her drink back and downed the remainder of its contents. She had already made a pact with herself that this would be her last party of the semester. Next week she would knuckle down with her casebooks and outlines, not emerging from her studying cocoon until after finals, so dammit, tonight she was going out with a bang.
Unaware that on this night the stars had aligned and cemented their destinies forever, Riley and Liam clinked cups and the nights descended into a muddled haze of alcohol, fire, and dark tales of dead legends.
***
It was the last Bonfire Night of the season, but Jake couldn’t stop thinking about the first. Bonfire Night had never really been his thing, even 1L year when it was all his friends could talk about. Invites were rarely extended to first years, but because one of his friends had a 3L sibling, his group made the cut.
His friends had loved that first night on the beach. It was the end of summer, and the salty air still retained its warmth hours after the sun went down. Students gathered around massive fires that couldn’t possibly be safe given the number of trees that surrounded them. Their only saving grace, Jake noted, was the fact that most of the trees this close to the shoreline were always damp due to the ever-present mist, constantly creeping in from the cold, indigo water.
His classmates gathered around the flames, drank far too much, and recounted inane stories about werewolves and witches and whatever else their dithering minds could conjure up. Jake thought the spectacle was pure idiocy. The entire night, in fact. While everyone got wasted from red solo cups and bad beer, Jake had to wonder if law school was going to be just a disappointing repeat of college.
After that night, he made the necessary excuses to his friends to get out of as many Bonfire Nights as he could, and there were a number of them to dodge. The law school students threw them once a weekend from the last week of August to the last week of September, as a farewell to summer and a last hurrah before their social lives were swallowed whole by their giant casebooks and crushing workloads.
But for the first Bonfire Night of their 3L year, his best friend Joey wasn’t about to let him off the hook again.
“It’s our last year and our last bonfire season,” Joey had pleaded. “We’re 3Ls now! We’ll have our pick of the litter.”
Jake scoffed, doubting that anyone at this institution would pique his interest, but he had a soft spot for Joey.
“Chelsea will be there…”
Jake didn’t know what to say to that. He knew Chelsea liked him. They’d been friends all throughout law school, and last year she started dropping hints she was interested in something more. But Jake wasn’t sure what, if anything, he wanted from Chelsea.
She was nice enough, pretty even. But otherwise… bland. Just so disappointing. Like the rest of his classmates. Uninspired, not remarkably intelligent.
Not special.
Not the way Jake was.
Jake had worked hard to get into a school like Inverness. He went to a good college, but it was nowhere near as prestigious as the law school to which he’d been admitted. But at Inverness, he felt like he had finally made it. Like he was getting the due that had always been owed to him.
Due to that penchant for hard work, Jake had made it to the top of his class, and he was sure he’d be offered a top law firm associate position at the end of the year. Jake felt a deep sense of pride in his academic ranking. He felt like it confirmed what he had known all along. He was better than all of these people.
“Come on, Jake! Have fun for a change—with a girl. You’re a good-looking dude, I don’t know why you never date anyone. You know how many of the girls here I’d date if I looked like you?”
“Fine, I’ll go!” Jake relented if only to get his friend off his back. Plus, Joey was right. Jake knew he was attractive, on so many more levels than the neanderthals he went to school with. Maybe he wasn’t interested in anything serious with his lackluster classmates, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t due his own modicum of fun. He hadn’t had any of that kind of fun since his college girlfriend broke up with him. And maybe with enough alcohol, Chelsea might prove more interesting…
But it wasn’t Chelsea who caught his eye that night.
Rather, it was the pretty 2L who Joey beelined over to the second they got there. At first, Jake was embarrassed for his friend, who clearly had no shot at this girl, 3L status or not. So as not to appear as weak and desperate as Joey, Jake acted aloof and uninterested.
Jake was familiar with these kinds of girls. They were beautiful, of course, but they always came with an unjustifiably high opinion of themselves. Girls like that were usually vapid, shallow, and stupid, and got into a school like Inverness either because of daddy’s fortune or by otherwise using their looks to get in.
But this one—Riley, he learned when she introduced herself, seemingly not intimidated by his show of disinterest— was different. It didn’t take long after meeting her for Jake to get that message loud and clear.
She wasn’t just another cookie-cutter popular girl. Her long brown hair was not only silky, but tinged with a color that fell somewhere between auburn and eggplant, and it shimmered in the firelight. She clearly wasn’t one to just blend into the crowd. With her tan skin, bright eyes, and glittering smile, Riley could have done just that and melded into the clique of her choice. But as the night went on, Jake observed that Riley was friends with everyone. She laughed a little too loud and had no problem making fun of herself. By the end of the night, Jake saw in her a kindred spirit——someone else who chose to be seen as an individual rather than part of the crowd. Someone who refused to conform to the social hierarchy bullshit.
There was something else different about Riley. Peculiar almost. Her golden-brown eyes were a little too intense, almost uncomfortably so. Her top lip was the tiniest bit crooked, and her smile hitched up at the ends in a full Cheshire grin. Her skin was tan, but not the kind you saw on girls who exposed themselves to one too many tanning beds or slathered on the fake tanner. He suspected she was mixed race, but he had no idea what those races could possibly be.
Her height was average, 5’5” maybe, which was a full foot shorter than Jake, and definitely a tick against her in that column. Her build was different, too. She wasn’t fat but she wasn’t thin, either. The more he looked at her, he could see the muscle tone and definition of an athletic build. It was too much muscle for his taste, but the curves helped, something else unusual for someone with that build.
No, Jake couldn’t quite place Riley. Was she a popular girl? Was she an athlete? By the way Riley looked at Jake, he felt she had him pegged from the start. Which was strange, because no one ever understood Jake. But something about her made him think that she just might.
Jake didn’t get her number that night. He figured if she liked him the way he suspected, she’d come to him. And she did. Just a few days later. She must have tracked down his email in the law student directory and used it to contact him. Granted, she was following up on something they had previously talked about, getting him the name of a few books that had come up in the course of their discussion that she thought he might be interested in. But Jake could see through the ruse.
The next weekend, they went out on their first date. Jake took her to a little taco place in the middle of Downtown. Most of the places in Fell’s Hollow had outdoor seating with romantic string lights and planters filled with colorful flowers attached to street-lamps or decorating the ground. Fell’s Hollow liked to showcase its Pacific Coast charm and take advantage of the fact that even in the colder weather months, people preferred to be outdoors to soak in its beauty. Even though it was a warm September evening, Jake chose a table inside. It was strategic. He didn’t want her to get the impression he was trying too hard.
The tacos arrived in baskets and even though they served alcohol, he pointedly refrained from ordering any and he was gratified when she followed suit.
Good girl.
To her credit, Riley wasn’t as talkative that night as she’d been the night they met. She let Jake do the heavy lifting, which suited him just fine. He primarily talked about his law school experience because, being a year ahead of Riley, he was certain he’d have valuable advice to impart which she would undoubtedly be grateful to hear. Then he moved on to his hobby—train-spotting—which he was sure would be impressive to her given its rarity. It highlighted how different he was when compared to the average guy. And Riley, being different herself, had to be impressed with his unique pursuits. The only time she really spoke up was when the topic of traveling came up.
“Oh and I love to travel,” Jake said.
“Me, too! We just went to Argentina last year and it was absolutely mag—”
“Oh, no no,” Jake cut her off. “I mean, travel around this region. I took a year off before law school to just travel, ya know, following the local train lines around. It was unbelievable.”
“Oh… so, you only like traveling domestically?”
Jake snorted, “No, I only like to travel in this part of our state. You can just travel around here and see everything you would ever possibly want to see. We have the coastline and the mountains and forests and The City. Deserts and canyon and red rock mountains just a little further southeast. Plus, my mom, brother, dogs, and favorite train lines are here. Why would I ever want to leave?”
He waited for her to agree with him. They were so clearly on the same page about everything.
Riley cleared her throat, “Oh uhh. Yeah, I guess there is a lot of merit to this area. But I actually like to travel, like, everywhere. Europe, South America, Africa, around this country. I’ve traveled domestically and abroad since I was a kid with my family, and I love seeing new places and experiencing new countries and cultures. You never realized just how vast and beautiful this world is until you travel. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s lovely here, but in my opinion, there is plenty more to experience outside of this region.”
Jake’s mouth was quirked up in a smile and he stared at her expectantly, waiting for the punchline. He was sure she must be joking. But she didn’t say anything, and to his horror, Jake realized she was being serious. Well, clearly they had a difference of opinion in this category.
Eager to find a way to assert the dominance of his opinion over hers, Jake turned to his tried and true strategy. “Where did you attend college?” This tactic never failed Jake. His college was ranked in the top twenty-five for the country, and top 5 in the state. He rarely met anyone who attended a better school than he did.
“Oh, I went to a school close by,” she hedged, and Jake knew he had assumed right. She doesn’t even want to say where she went because she’s embarrassed. It must be really bad then. A smug smile spread across his face. He knew someone who looked like her must have used her physical assets to get into Inverness for law school.
“Where?” He pushed, closing in for the kill.
“I went to Inverness.”
“No, I mean, where did you for undergrad?”
“Here. I went to Inverness.”
The food almost dropped out of Jake’s mouth. How was it possible she got into Inverness University when hewasn’’t even waitlisted there. It was the best school in the country. The law school was notoriously difficult to get into, but the undergraduate was definitely even more competitive.
She asked him where he went, but the reveal wasn’t nearly as sweet as he now knew he was admitting to attending a far less prestigious school.
His only comfort was that they both ended up at Inverness for law school. But he knew having that double Inverness stamp on her resume would open doors for her that even his law school ranking couldn’t touch.
Jake felt a mixture of respect and envy. She was smart, sure, he wouldn’t have indulged her interest otherwise, but there was no way she was more intelligent than he was. She had to be a legacy. Or it was a product of her looks…somehow.
He didn’t think she was the kind of girl who would sleep with someone to get what she wanted. Jake would never be interested in someone like that. In fact, it was her innocence that made Jake like her. It set off something primal in him that he’d never felt before. It made him want to claim and protect her.
Other than that unfortunate hiccup, the rest of the date had gone very well, Jake thought. So well, in fact, that he insisted on walking her to the door at the end of the night, despite her protests. When he leaned in to kiss her, it was awkward and stilted. Maybe it was the height difference throwing them off? But they could navigate around that. And anyway, Jake wasn’t deterred. Riley was the perfect girl for him. The only girl he had ever met that seemed worthy enough.
The kiss didn’t last long and Riley muttered a hurried goodbye before rushing inside. It had all happened so fast that if the date had gone worse, Jake might have wondered why she didn’t stay longer—why her key was still turning the lock to open the door despite his lips being on hers.
But that was a ridiculous train of thought to entertain. He was sure she was just overcome with emotion the way he was. He never thought he was the kind of person who could form such a deep attachment to anyone, let alone so fast.
And she was a girl. Girls always had a difficult time handling their emotions. She must have been overcome by her growing feelings for him. He smiled to himself as he walked back to his car. Of course, he had that kind of effect on her. There was no one else like him in the world, after all.
They hung out twice more, with mutual friends. And they almost did more than kiss on one of those occasions. By the way she pressed her tight body into his, it made him second guess his assessment of her innocence. But then she pulled away and practically ran to her car. He chased her down, of course. He knew this was what she wanted—it was just an act for the game she was playing.
“It’s okay, Riley, I feel it, too,” he consoled. And it was true. It was an all-consuming feeling that neither of them could fight. Like it was meant to be. Not that Jake had ever believed in such silliness before, but being with Riley was almost enough to make him throw all rational thought aside. And he told her as much as he caught up with her in the street just before she reached her car, and grabbed her arm, pulling her into an embrace. He rocked her there, under the hanging leaves that moved with the ocean breeze and the orange glow of the streetlamps. He thought the moment was romantic, and he was sure he’d get her to turn around and come back inside, so they could finish what they had started.
But she removed herself from his arms and before he could break through the romantic fog, her headlights trailed away into the darkness, doing it for him.
When he didn’t hear from her that first week, Jake was amused. He must have really done a number on her if she was too shy to even reply to a test. He wasn’t worried, though. Once Riley had time to process her multitude of female emotions, she’d be back in his arms. But one week turned into two, and then three, and four. And other than passing nods of recognition and short greetings in the hallways at school, Riley hadn’t spoken to him since that night.
The thunderous sound of waves crashing in the distance mixed with the cacophony of his classmates’ laughter brought him back to the current moment; as it scratched at his brain in stark contrast to Riley’s prolonged silence.
He’d almost been tempted into attending the other bonfire nights in hopes of recreating their first meeting. But he’d held out. Jake was sure she would come around once she realized he wasn’t going to indulge in her silly games.
But tonight, he decided to come. It was the last one after all. Surely by now, she’d realized her plan had backfired. Jake watched her from across the beach, hunkered down around the fire he shared with his friends. The chill in the ocean breeze was more prominent than it had been previously, and it was clear that fall had finally settled in around their seaside town.
He leaned closer to the flames, and let the heat lick at his face. The sensation reminded him of the fire that engulfed his body the last time they had kissed, ignited by the feel of her soft lips and the way she pressed her body into his. It had only happened once, but you couldn’t fake that kind of emotion and desire. It was as obvious and present and hot as the blaze in front of him.
The sea breeze carried traces of chatter and laughter from Riley and her group of friends. Once again, he looked over, hoping to catch her eye. If he could just make out a smile or wink or some other hint that would betray the fact that she felt the same way he did, then this night might not be a total waste.
Instead of affirmation, Jake saw that Riley was sitting next to a guy he had never seen before. She touched the stranger’s arm and pointed to the crowd gathering around the refreshments in the middle of all the bonfires, before leaning in close—too close— and whispering in the guys’ ear. The stranger’s face split into a smile as a result, and a burning filled Jake’s chest. He was suddenly finding it difficult to breathe.
Jake had half a mind to go over there. To tell this guy to get the fuck away from his girl. He wanted to grab the guy by the neck, heave him into the whitewash, and wait for a passing great white to snap him up.
Jake was surprised by the amount of emotion that had just passed through him.
Was this jealousy? He had never felt it before. Not on this level, at least.
And then it hit him.
So that was her game. She was riling him up on purpose. She wanted to provoke him.
Jake racked his brain to make the pieces fall into place.
Maybe she was just testing him. Maybe she hadn’t been talking to him these past few weeks because she wanted a grand gesture. She wanted him to chase her. Of course! How could he have been so blind?
She was probably waiting for him to storm up to their group right now, punch that guys’ lights out and take her in his arms.
And this desperate attempt to feign flirting with someone else so blatantly right in front of him—the ruse was so shallow, he was surprised no one else could see through it.
But he wasn’t going to give her the satisfaction.
He was going to make her wait for it. Make her suffer a bit longer.
No, Jake would make her come to him. She’d apologize for playing such stupid games, and he’d made her jump through a few hoops before forgiving her. She had to recognize who was going to be in charge between the two of them. Jake would not abide a shift in the inevitable and necessary power dynamic between men and women. But he knew that what she secretly wanted. It’s what all of them wanted—the good ones, at least.
Faintly, he heard Riley calling his name. He closed his eyes, a smile spreading across his face as images that warmed him even more than the bonfire came unbidden but not unwelcome to his mind.
But then someone touched his arm, and he was jerked back to the present moment.
“Earth to Jake! Hello? Anyone home?” The blonde next to him playfully pinched him, bobbing in front of him like a white buoy out on the dark water, clearly desperate for his attention.
Jake felt a stab of irritation and turned his focus on the girl. Chelsea had been one of his friends for years now. She was tall and lithe, with a nice smile. Pretty, but a little plain—bland. She was pleasant and ever-present. And she had always had a crush on Jake and made no attempt to hide it.
And that was exactly why he needed a girl like Riley. Someone sophisticated enough to implement some kind of strategy in order to secure him. Someone who not only realized his value but also matched his intelligence. Riley understood what made Jake tick in a way someone like sweet, simple Chelsea never could.
But two could play that game.
“Apologies, Chelsea. I—had something on my mind.”
She smiled at him. “Anything I can help with?” And the innuendo was no lost on him.
“In fact, yes. You can.” He threw an arm around her and she leaned into him, relaxing as if this spot at his side was made for her. Jake felt a surge of defensiveness, knowing that spot had been carved out for someone else, but he swallowed it back down. Chelsea was a means to an end, he reminded himself. He flipped his long, dark hair out of his face, but instead of returning Chelsea’s adoring gaze, he turned his attention back across the beach to Riley.
Yes, two can play this game.
***
He didn’t need to be in the shadows to move amongst them undetected. That was his gift. One of many, in fact.
The Shadow. The Creature. He snorted at the various monikers gifted him by local, law enforcement, and civilians alike, each one more outlandish than the next. They weren’t exactly inaccurate, but his true nature couldn’t be captured in merely a nickname.
He was so much more than they could comprehend. More intelligent. More dangerous.
More lethal.
It had been years since he had hunted in Fell’s Hollow. All it took was one slip up back then and he knew it was time to pack up and move territories. Besides, the time wasn’t exactly right yet. He knew that and yet… the compulsion had been set in place could no longer be denied.
And it seemed the world agreed with him. His job at the time had been in The City. He only hunted in Fell’s Hollow because that was the name of the game. But he had been offered a position that would require him to travel every other week, and given his need to separate himself from Fell’s Hollow for a while, he decided it would be best to take his show on the road.
But he was surprised how little the urge manifested the further away he got from Fell’s Hollow. He had only gone to school there, but something about the place was deeply embedded in his psyche. So much so that this latent bloodlust that manifested in his early twenties only grew to untamable levels within the city limits.
At first, he thought it was brought to life by a particular event. But if he was really honest with himself, he had harbored this kind of darkness deep within in soul for as long as he could remember. It was the flip side of his golden boy exterior, but just as much a part of him—maybe even more so.
So it wasn’t surprising to him that when offered the chance to return to Fell’s Hollow, he took it without hesitation. He hadn’t felt the urge to hunt at first, which he found strange. But he knew it would come on, in time. It was a part of him now, and there would be no escape.
And he was right.
Because tonight, something was different. He didn’t need to understand why. The heat raced through his veins. A drumbeat pulsing its rhythm through his bloodstream that could not be ignored. It was preternatural—a yearning and a knowing.
There was prey to be had tonight.
Usually, he avoided gatherings like the one on the beach. He couldn’t risk drawing even more attention to himself. He was already the perfect predator, exactly suited to draw in his prey. Which was another tick mark on the side of this is who he has always been. His whole life, people orbited around him, wanting to get closer and closer to the sun, unaware of the fiery and painful consumption that awaited them.
He only came tonight because his friend had invited him, and something buried deep inside had flared to life at the suggestion. And that was all he needed to know it was once again time.
He knew he couldn’t stay for long, but he usually didn’t need that long. His instinct, once awakened, was sharp. Once he saw it, he knew what he wanted. But only after his wolf senses had been engaged. Up until that point, he could be absolutely unaware of the perfect prey right under his nose.
It was funny how it worked. He didn’t really understand the fine details or machinations. But he didn’t need to. He was a servant to its will. Because that’s what gave him the ultimate power that rightly belonged to him. What more could he want?
He walked the beach, taking in the scene unfolding before him. Red flames licked up toward the inky night sky, like the fires of hell futilely attempting to warm the frozen dark expanse of the cosmos.
Unaware of their tiny, insignificant place in space and time, small groups of excited, intoxicated students gathered around, enveloping him in their fold. They occupied his companion, and he managed to extricate himself so that he could search in peace. It would be easier to identify the source of the call if he wasn’t constantly worried about someone seeing his mask slip.
The scent of sea salt mixed with the musky aroma of burning wood wound around his path, and he fancied himself a dark, ancient god emerging from the depths of the forest to consume the unsuspecting. He generally didn’t have time to notice such insignificant details, but he thought it fitting that tonight the primal call of the beast within rendered him for attuned to his surroundings.
And just like that, he locked in on it.
Like a shark, sensing the thrashing of a wounded animal and the scent of blood entering the water. His head turned toward the base of the cliffs, and he saw a group of seven. He recognized some of them, although the names failed him. Names were ultimately unimportant. But they weren’t.
His eyes roved around the group.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
Yes…Yes, that must be it.
It was as if the pieces of the puzzle had finally come together. Somehow he had found what he had been waiting for, without even registering the wait or recognizing the true source of the want.
Light emanated from their skin, already awash in the glow of firelight. He could see it, like a halo of power shining out from within. But this time, it was different than before. The light was almost too bright, and he had the strangest inkling that if he stared directly at it for too long, it might damage his eyes, like staring at an eclipse.
He licked his lips, already salivating at the promise of power—the inevitable result of the act of consumption and domination.
His body willed him forward, but his mind kept his feet rooted. Thankfully he was evolved enough to resist the instinctual pull of the bloodlust. The next bit was his favorite part after all.
The stalking. The circling.
Setting the trap. Outwitting his prey.
He liked to let the fear build and percolate for a while in his victims. It made the final kill that much sweeter. When they knew he was coming for them, but still couldn’t do anything about it. The ultimate pathetic surrender to terror, desperation, and helplessness in his victims.
Their failure. His triumph.
That was his favorite part.
Remembering himself, he glanced around to ensure no one had noticed him slip away from the festivities. But the alcohol was flowing so much he doubted that anyone could see clearly at all anymore, let alone be alert enough to take notice. Even his friend seemed to be lost in the celebration, sipping out of a red cup and talking animatedly to a group of people. Someone handed him a fresh cup, and he swapped out his empty one gratefully.
No, not even his friend would be aware if he decided to take his prey out tonight. But he wouldn’t. He had patience, after all. He may be a monster, but he wasn’t an animal.
But there was one person who despite the booze and distractions, seemed hyper-aware. One person who was laser-focused, not on him, thankfully, but rather on the exact same prey. However, instead of the calculated, evolved manner in which he zeroed in on his target, a manic look flashed in this one’s eyes indicating his mental state—chaotic, frenetic… unhinged.
It was as if it took every last ounce of strength for this predator to not launch himself at the brightness.
So, another hunter had located the same target, amplifying the degree of difficulty and the stakes. It was strange. This had never happened before. The game was suddenly even more exhilarating, with the brightest targets he’d ever seen and another challenger entering the arena.
And just like that, the hunt was on.
nevver:
Into the Woods, Raphael Olivier
I vanquish demons with a little help from my friends...
A few years ago, I met someone I really liked. I thought he was handsome, smart, and sweet, and even though he seemed a little shy at first, I felt like we instantly clicked. But despite how physical attractive I found him, I wasn’t sure at first if our bond was more friendship or romantic. I like to think we started off as friends and over time it began to develop into something more, but I’d be lying to say I didn’t always consider the option of something more with him.
After a few months of us talking casually and slowly but surely growing closer, I was invited to a hang out by some of our mutual friends. I was excited, as I honestly hoped he might be there. And if not, I wondered if our friends knew we had been keeping in touch. If they were aware, I hoped I might get some good intel.
And sure enough, one of the first things one of our friends said to me was, “Oh, how’s ________ doing? I haven’t seen him in a while, but I heard you guys are getting close.”
I couldn’t tell how she meant it. Did she mean we were close as in good friends or something more? Truth but told, that was exactly the question I had been wondering about myself.
I told her yeah, we were getting to be good friends and that he was doing well as far as I knew. At a certain point, after enough alcohol had been consumed, I confessed I was growing more than friendly feelings toward him, and I was thinking about telling him soon.
Now, many things were said in response to this. A great many confusing things. Comments and ideas that have haunted me for years now.
She said on one hand, she thought that might be a good idea. She said she thought we had a connection she hadn’t seen him have with anyone else. She said she could see it really working out. She also said the fe times she’d seen him have serious relationships, it had been with someone he had been friend with first.
On the other hand, she said he was pretty much a notorious womanizer and a terrible boyfriend as he usually cheated on whomever he was dating. She said she had long since given up on setting him up with any of her friends because he just ran through them and was never really interested in anyone.
On the other other hand, she said she didn’t think he would do that to me… but she wasn’t sure. He didn’t have a great track record.
She accused him of some other incredibly shady behavior that I’m not going to go into because she couldn’t substantiate it and when I asked him about it, he said it wasn’t true, and maybe I’m a fool, but my gut told me to trust him.
She told me she thought he was currently dating someone else, which legitimately broke my heart and I was pretty upset, until I realized that I hadn’t yet revealed my feelings so I didn’t have any right to be upset as up to that point, we were still just friends.
But perhaps the worst, most damaging thing she said was that her biggest worry was that he said he could only seriously date people “in his world” as they were the only ones who could ever understand his life; and that world definitely did not include me. I didn’t know what that meant, but my assumptions and insecurities ran rampant.
Given my academic pedigree, I was usually considered the prize by the people I dated. For various reasons, I often found myself on a pedestal I kept desperately trying to get my boyfriends to take me down from. But for the first time in my adult dating life, I was being told that I wasn’t good enough.
“The world” she was referring to, I loosely interpreted to mean the elite of the elite. The wealthiest, the most famous, the most talented, the most influential. I wasn’t an heiress, I wasn’t a model or actress or rock star, or daughter of one. I wasn’t instagram official. I was a lawyer who, at the time, worked in fashion but longed to be a writer.
Even though she said a great many things to me that night, some speculating positively about me liking our mutual friend and some negatively, nothing affected me quite as much as this comment and unfortunately, it has hung heavy over my heart, mind, and shoulders ever since.
I wasn’t good enough. In fact, I was so far from good enough for this person, that if what she said was right, not only would I not be his first pick but he would never even consider seriously me a candidate.
The guy I liked, my friend, the one I thought liked me back, the one I was convinced had kind of been pursuing me, well, in fact, I was an idiot for thinking any of that. And not only was I an idiot, but I was a not now nor never will be good enough fool. In fact, were we even friends? Had I imagined the whole thing? If he could only bond with people in “his world”, maybe our friendship didn’t even stack up the way I thought it did.
And that fucking stung.
As a direct result, I spent the better part of the last several years trying to be more than I was. Not just to be good enough for him, but in large part it was to do just that. And also to prove to myself that I was good enough. That maybe, one day, I could be considered good enough by this vague, amorphous elite that clearly the guy I liked and my friend felt I inherently wasn’t good enough to be considered a part of or considered to have the potential to be a part of.
Fast forward to now. I’m not there yet. I’m closer than I was four years ago, but I’m still no where near a place that would ever heal this tremendous ego wound.
The wound only festered over time, spewing jealousy, insecurity, bitterness, and resentment. Tons of darker emotions and honestly dismal periods of time were a results of this one comment, but I don’t want to go into those right now. You can read previous posts of mine here and get a pretty good idea of how poorly I felt about myself in the wake of this particular comment.
Out of all of the things she said that night, good and bad, this was the one that has stuck with me to this day.
“You’re not good enough. You don’t belong in his world. He’ll never see you as good enough.”
And the thing was, it wasn’t just about his perception. But also the fact that in this one category, this one very real, incredibly superficial and yet important category in the real fucking world, objectively she was right. I wasn’t good enough. I probably never would be. It’s almost impossible to be good enough to belong to this “world.”
I think it also hit me pretty hard because I have some pretty sizable professional goals that I’ve had my entire life which when achieved, would put me much closer to if not well within this “world.” So, being told that I wasn’t good enough for this world and the implication that I probably wouldn’t ever be was a slap in the face for me personally because it just reminded me that had I worked harder faster, I might not be as far behind in my personal goals as I was. It reminded me of my own shortcomings, insecurities, and failures.
And the crazy thing was at this point in time, I had already graduated from the number one school in the country, done valuable and difficult medical work in Africa and saved lives as a result, won a slew of academic and writing awards, graduated from law school, become an attorney, gone to the NCAA tournament, amongst other impressive achievements. I had plenty to feel proud and confident about. Enough so that I could look at that world, and especially the people with more tenuous or superficial ties to it, and feel like I held up pretty well under scrutiny.
But I didn’t feel that way. I just couldn’t. At every road block with this person, every time things went off, even the slightest bit, it felt like a rejection BECAUSE I JUST WASN’T FUCKING GOOD ENOUGH. I wasn’t good enough for him, his world, or my own deepest dreams and ambitions.
Even now, with a fashion brand under my belt, books I’m working toward publishing, and being closer than ever before to making my lofty professional dreams a reality, my not being a part of that world is more apparent than ever. It’s like the closer I get, the more I’m reminded that it may be within reach but I’m still not there yet. And time is a’ticking and I’m not getting any younger. Worst yet, the longer it takes me to get to that world, the less impressive it is. The less appealing I am professionally and personally given the inflated value of the commodity of youth. And the fear that I might never do it despite my toiling increases with every passing second.
The thing is, it stopped being about being good enough for that guy long ago. At some point, it just morphed into this feeling of not being good enough to exist, to take up space in this world, or to take up the kind of space I feel like I deserve, or should merit before I die. It’s thrown me into a kind of existential crisis—a prolonged anxiety attack marinating over a bubbling cauldron of crippling, soul-crushing insecurity spiced with an extra dash of failure.
Granted, I’m smart enough to see and recognize all this for what it is. And the more sane, rational part of me knows my worth, regardless of whether I’m in that world yet or ever will be. So I can keep this particular demon at bay, and I’ve gotten really good at it especially in the last year. And I’m damn proud of myself for that.
Still, demons are always lurking under the surface, waiting for your most vulnerable, susceptible moments to drag you under. It’s a war I’ve been waging since the second I heard those words.
Until a few nights ago.
I spent time with a friend of mine that I don’t get to see often enough. We’ve been friends since we were just kids in middle school. Two nerds amongst a sea of nerds that got each other then and somehow found our way back into each others’ lives despite being separated for years as we both navigated the insane waters of our late teens and early twenties.
I had told her about this guy a few years ago, and I was concluding the story for her now basically explaining why I had decided to give up and walk away about a year ago. I told her this part of the story, too. About my underlying insecurity that I’d never been good enough for him. I said it as evenly as possible, but I think the pain was apparent despite my dead pan delivery, especially given my friend is one smart girl.
My friend, who is more in “his world” than I might ever be, paused for a second before she said something that I didn’t realize until now how much I needed to hear.
I’m paraphrasing here because much alcohol was consumed later this evening so my memory is admittedly a bit foggy, but basically my friend said, “Wow. What a shitty thing for your ‘friend’ to have said to you.”
I was taken aback by her response. I had cringed when I said it, believing there was a chance that my friend would agree with her, saying something along the lines of, “Yeah, it’s probably for the best you walked away, you guys are in two different worlds.”
But she didn’t say that. She didn’t say whether it was true or not, she just said it was not ok for someone to have said that to me. It wasn’t until this morning, a day and a half later that the importance of my friend’s reaction sank into me when I broke down into tears over my tea and writing this morning.
That was a shitty thing to say. A true friend of mine would never have said something like that. Who says that kind of thing to someone? The comment was mean and hurtful, and should never have breathed oxygen.
If one of my friends really liked someone and confided in me about it, the last thing in the world I would say to them would be to imply they weren’t good enough for that person.
And I’m not trying to rag on the person who said this to me. Maybe she meant that she didn’t agree with it, but that’s what she thought he thought. But even then, she would be implying that he thinks I’m not good enough for him. Which again, is a fucking shitty thing to say or imply to someone.
She had already said so many things to dissuade me from liking him, did she really need to throw in that grenade as well?
Anyway, I don’t want to rag on this person. Maybe she didn’t mean it the way I took it.
Instead, I want to focus on my friend who finally pointed out to me that regardless of veracity, that comment should never have been made. That idea that I wasn’t good enough because I’m not famous or fame adjacent should never have been put into my head.
I truly hope going forward that I remember my friend’s take on it. Sometimes, it’s the people we’ve known since childhood who know best what we need to hear. And my friend hit the nail on the head. Lauren, if you’re reading this, you have no idea how much your reaction meant to me the other night. Thank you for paving the way for me to put this demon to rest once and for all.
Sometimes, all you need is to talk to someone who genuinely cares about you, even if you’ve spent years apart. I needed a true friend to tell me that idea should never have entered my mind. And now I’m going do my best to heed my friend’s words.
Let people in. Let people love you. Sometimes you need your true friends and the people who actually care about you more than you even know. I did, and thankfully I had a true friend to help me begin to vanquish this particularly painful and destructive demon.
Ruthless ~ Something Corporate
This is the only lonely picture
Waiting on my floor littering my shore
This is the last true burning letter
Given to a girl
Written by a boy
Living in a world
Created to destroy
But if I built you a city
Would you let me?
Would you tear it down?
But there you go for the last time
I finally know now what I should have known then
And I could still be ruthless if you let me
But there you go when I'm not done
You're waving goodbye well at least you're having fun
The rising tide will not let you forget me
forget me
This is your ghost that kneels before me
Razors on her tongue, a body full of oxygen
It won't be the last time she'll ignore me
The Thinning of my skin
Without the strength to go
The Winter setting in
To cover you in snow
But if I built you a city, would you let me in?
Would you tear it down?
But there you go for the last time
I finally know what I should have known then
And I could still be ruthless if you let me
But there you go when I'm not done
You're waving goodbye well at least you're having fun
the rising tide will not let you forget me
forget me
forget me
forget me, yeah
I'll raise towers and climb them
Rivers and walk them
Oceans to drown in
you won't make a sound in
But there you go for the last time
I finally know what I should have known then
And I could still be ruthless if you let me
But there you go when I'm not done
You're waving goodbye well at least you're having fun
The rising tide will not let you forget me
forget me
“Here’s the thing I think we all need to realize—generally speaking, making things right is not that hard.”
—Jonathan Decker
If ya know, ya know ;)
New Update Post up @ new website !
Goodbye for a while, I think...
Do you want the good news first or the bad news? The good news is I’m currently in the process of creating a new (better) website to host my blog. It’s going to include not only blog posts/personal life updates but also poetry, pictures, videos, chapters of Prey, upcoming BELLE + DAY projects, and I dunno, basically anything I feel inclined to create and share.
The bad news is this website is going to be private. I haven’t decided yet whether or not I’ll make it wholly or partly private, but the juicy stuff, the tea I’ve been dying to spill if not for any other reason than to get it off my chest, the chapters of the latest draft of Prey for my friends to proof/edit/enjoy, poetry, pics, and videos I want to share but not with the whole world via instagram or tumblr--all of that content will definitely be password protected.
2021 has been a year of me doing my best to step out of the matrix of social media and step back into what I can taste, touch, smell, hear, and feel in the much less simulated reality of “IRL”. It feels really great being back in the real world, and I’m starting to appreciate my privacy and diminished digital availability more than I can express. However, I have projects I am working on and thoughts and feelings and moods and ideas that I still want to share with a very select group of people. Which is why I am starting this other site.
I haven’t decided yet whether to directly contact the people I shortlisted to have access to this new site when it’s up (I’m still fleshing it out at the moment) or if I’m going to leave clues in my IG posts and stories that will reveal the web address and the password... TBD
Anywho, if you want to make sure you’re on the list that will have access to the new site, txt, email, or DM me. If you don’t have the ability to txt, email, or DM me then you probably wouldn’t be granted access to the site anyway. Sorry babes. I’m doing my best to make as many moves as possible right now, and it’s easiest to do that in the dark.
Oh and if you have the ability to txt me and you ask to be included, there’s like a 99.9% chance I would include you, so don’t be shy about asking ;)
I guess a few of you will catch me later when the site goes live!
XO,
T