forever and always, in my own little world.

🪻30s & F (minors dni)🪻vegan🪻nrodvrgnt🪻5'8½"🪻sw: 160🪻cw: 128 🪻ugw: 120 𖠰 𖠰𖠰 𖠰𖠰𖠰 I don’t claim to have any specific 3D. I’m just here

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I ordered myself a pink digital camera for my birthday coming up (vivitar brand, very inexpensive but impressive for the price point) and I’m gonna start posting more pics on here to share my life ! that’s my promise to myself (and to you, my moots, thank you to the like 4 of you that interact, you seriously save me)

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📌

lol

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found on 📌… I love stuff like this it literally eases my nervous system

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I don’t have the motivation to leave the house. it’s just one of those mornings. I got some skincare delivered from Amazon, I’m getting a grocery order dropped off soon, I did my face yoga and skincare and shaved my legs … we’re not doing terrible or anything I just like , sometimes cannot leave the apartment. even though technically I want to go for a walk. I do know however that if I were a man, and didn’t fear constant harassment, I would be able to go for a walk whenever and I wouldn’t have to worry about having my self defense easy to reach and always be looking over my shoulder. anyway ….. today I just need a comfort meal, so I’m gonna have chickpeas with cherry tomatoes and parsley with some sourdough bread dipped in olive oil & herbs.

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against my better judgement I ate a snack yesterday before dinner and my body can only handle a small breakfast and an early dinner, nothing else, otherwise my digestion gets fucked up so now today I haven’t *eliminated* yet if you know what I mean, so now I feel bloated and uncomfortable. and I hate it sooooooo much

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and then immediately after my last post about feeling myself , I was all insecure today 😂

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in other news, I’ve been honestly feeling sk1nny especially the last couple days… I did a 36 or so hour fast last week and it helped seal the deal, and idk I’ve just been feeling slim and I saw my legs in a full length mirror yesterday when I was at goodwill and my brain noticed they look slim … so I feel like super good about that , it’s been a long time since I felt that way !!!!

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hey frandz, I started an eBay store to make up for some of the purchases, just selling some things I don’t use anymore and I made $200 in the first 3 days 👀 which I don’t think is normal lol !!!! so I’ve been all busy sending packages and whatnot !!! it’s been actually scary and stressful because my autism gets HIGHLY overwhelmed very easily especially at the UPS store when people act impatient with me and I’m new to something omg I was nearing a meltdown and then I left my wallet there cuz I was trying to leave so fast … but anyway so now that I made some money back I want to shop more … fuck, you guys.

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hey yall … I went on a bike ride + hike in 95 degrees after days of severe c@l r3$tr!ction and barely any water intake … I was like really struggling, I do not recommend. I’m home now and I cooled down, I’m lucky to have air conditioner and I took a cold shower quick and ate a grapefruit … and I’m gonna eat some dinner soon. but yeah it was quite rough for a bit there

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I’ve relapsed on my shopping addiction. I did really well for a couple months but because of the uncertainly in my ability to trust my life circumstances at the moment, I couldn’t resist the dopamine rush. at first it was just a couple pairs of jeans from goodwill. then I ordered four more pairs online. then, I ordered just one purse. it turned into 2 more purses. it’s okay — everything was used, I spent a couple hundred in total, I didn’t go bankrupt — but I need to stop. my birthday is in a month so I’ll count this as spoiling myself for my birthday, but I need to take care of future me by saving as much money as possible. if any of my wonderful moots have any words of comfort or encouragement, please send them my way 😭😭😭 love yall 💗💗💗💗

p.s. I’ll post pics when I get the stuff 😭😭😭

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another one from 📌… exceedingly true

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found on 📌 lol and it’s God’s honest truth

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I really just want people to be nice to me or leave me alone that’s all I want

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I’m loving the baggy pants so much and I’m so depressed so I just spent another $60 on ebay … I got 3 pairs of cargo pants: black, green, and camo. I am NOT supposed to be spending, but this is my new style era, I’m depressed af, and … I won’t do it again. I’m done, that was it. maybe I can count it as my birthday present to myself because my birthday is in a month.

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honestly I’m about to just give in to the depression and not expect myself to do anything but lay on the couch and look at my phone.

for as long as it takes, until I’m sick of it and I’ve had enough.

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new jeans … <3

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I’m sooooo depressed honestly… so even tho I haven’t been spending like that, I decided to go to goodwill and I found 3 pairs of baggy jeans (light wash med and dark wash for the full spectrum, good brands too), a pair of Hurley drawstring pants, an oversize camo tee, and an oversize soft dark gray crew neck. I also ordered a pink microphone with the fluffy thing to connect with my iPhone. I take a lot of video diaries for myself and I especially need to what with … everything going on right now. so honestly my purchases really do make me feel a little better. I’m considering eating more food too which is not a very excellent idea but a Saturday is about the only day I’d permit that because I still get to sleep in tomorrow for my digestion rather than just getting up at 5 like on weekdays.