backspace, my scarab

the ultimate himejoshi also hi I'm obsessed with touhou now

[sanjipussyindulgence]

check it out, i'm in the house like carpet

[captain-price-returns]

What did Mitch mean when he said this

[mollyyancey]

[elfworm]

[resident-idiot-simp]

[sadclowncentral]

just showed the gate agent the Wikipedia article for Mussels instead of my boarding pass. don't text

[sleepingterrors]

rorita yuuka doodle

[lemonsweet]

Do you remember the episode of Spongebob where he's training gary for the snail race and does a coach persona + calls gary a girl and has an aside where he's like "I called you a lady to demean you 🤓" and right after he says that it cuts to sandy and she somehow telepathically feels that Spongebob just did something misogynistic and us like I feel like I need to kick Spongebobs ass for some reason. And then she appears just at the end of the episode to kick his ass.

[lemonsweet]

These tags keep making me laugh

[oh--lapetitemort]

Sexualize me a little it's for my mental health

[itousa]

In my head 💭🌈🎡⛳️🌼🎒🧸📚

[fivetrench]

Shit just happens to you when you're a tuna crab

[slushyseals]

Little man blessed himself as he saw that wave acomin'

[tragbarerpanzrabwehrkomplexfagot]

[chennnington]

I think I should start bragging about my adopted son’s achievements when people around me start bragging about their kids. Ooooh your child can count to 10 in mandarin? Well, my child found 110 landmines! And he’s only 6 years old!

[assaultmystic]

a quirk of sexting while british is switching from arse to ass. i would never fuck someone in the arse. its impolite.

[evilneo]

[sleepy-bebby]

[fandaniel]

having a multi year long character obsession becomes like a abstract thought experiment at some point

[anti-parent]

teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek

[anti-parent]

fantastic. i love it. i posted this after my wife said it yesterday and as i was doing it i was like "this can't be an original thought. as soon as i hit post someone's going to say 'you stole this from a tweet from 2014' and i'll say 'no, i stole it from my beautiful wife.'"