The Prophet Of Triune

I am what I need to be, in all shapes and form, I will be what I need to be for anyone who needs me here. I ask that you be respectful and I will try to do the same.

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Feels so strange logging in to this familiar page, everything feels different, the ebbs and flows of my life often change the perspective I have on many a thing. I don't know if any of my old followers and friends will see this, but I hope you are well and if you'd like to reach out I'd love to chat with you. God bless.

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Sometimes when the dark is consuming your vision, there is a moment of clarity and deception, a moment the world misinterprets an acceptance of finality as a return to the normal. When in all honesty they are the closest to the edge they’ve ever been.

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I hope everyone is having more luck than me, praying for you all. I hope you all see your tomorrow, I wont be in contact for an unknown period of time. Hopefully sooner than later 

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How are you? Missed you lots :(

Not good, been having a nightmare and I am really afraid its coming true. Not sure if I have to give up what I want to keep something I have.

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Are you okay? You sound off.

Yes. I am fine, just really cold out here, talk to people tomorrow, shutting my phone off.

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What is true love in your eyes?

True love I am convinced more and more does not exist the way I prayed it did. Love is a process full of mutual sacrifice, True love would be two people willing to do whatever possible, sacrifice whatever necessary for the chance of making it work. But I am unsure there will be a situation where both people hold that thought of love in such high regard.

So true love in my eyes unfortunately is a lost cause, find someone you are happy with, and try and stick it out with them, and I pray anyone reading this, proves me wrong, cause I hope you all get to experience something close to how I see true love.

Although it requires sacrifice, it was still the most beautiful and wonderful feeling I have ever experienced, even if it was a false one. I could write a novel of the beauty of it, but I am afraid I a bit torn at the moment. I wish you the best Nonsy.

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I feel lost with the girl I love.

I’m sorry to hear that, I know how difficult that is... I hope you have better luck than me friend. I hope you can maintain hope.

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Lies

Often they start small, often they grow quite large, Yet a small lie growing to be a large one is not the most dangerous part of a lie. The most dangerous lies, will always be the small or big lies, we fool ourselves into believing. There is great strength in clinging to a hope, believing it to be true, holding out for that chance at greatness, yet as the hope grows, so do the chances of realizing despair. The realization that you aren’t enough, and when that moment comes where you are faced with the lies you fed yourself, will you turn away? Will you lie to yourself further? Will you give up? Or will you face reality head on? I pray you find an answer other than mine.

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It is truly nights like tonight, where I sit alone in the darkness, the dim light of my screen the only proof of anything existing within this room, yes nights like this, where unfocused eyes strain for something that resembles hope, nights like tonight, where the absolute silence simply will not shut up, where the gentle clicks of my keyboard are louder than any voice trying to reason with me, yes it is these nights I’d once forgotten.

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Sleepless nights seem to be becoming my norm again, I might start writing, stay posted.

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There is a unique pain in letting go that which you’ve never been able to release. A special tightness in the chest as your mind refuses to release the grip on your heart. The unsettling burn of the eyes left immune to the moisture they produce. 

Yet in the face of it all, do not regret. There is a beauty in releasing, there is liberation in letting go. Keep your eyes on tomorrow because there is hope in a rising sun, but sadness dwells in the darkness of a moon waiting to rise.

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Wanted to thank people for the messages, just a really really bad night, I probably shouldn’t talk to anyone, think I am just going to run for a while, enjoy your day.

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May you all have a less terrible day than mine! God bless you all and goodnight

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Never forget the what matter in your life, what the things you want to protect are, what it is you don’t want to ever lose, when you stumble across such things, make sure you are willing to fight for them no matter how that means. Taking a step back, throwing yourself into it 100%, everything takes a different approach, hope that you’ve chosen the right one. Because it will determine how many hits you can take before falling to the ground.

To all those who need it, I am here, you aren’t alone, and that will never change.

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Mistakes

Mistakes are things we hope we can take back, things we hope can be forgiven. Often they can, but you never know when one mistake will take you to far. Mistakes while drunk or under the influence of medication often can be the most damning, Sometimes it is the mistake we never thought was a mistake to begin with that costs us the most.

It is times like that, praying is the only thing one can do, pray that there is at least one more chance. I hope you all have forgiveness left for you, I hope you all have a good day, or good night.

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I really, really want to vanish where no one can find me,

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Depths Of My Mind

There is always a sense of doubt, a moment of second guessing. Am I truly prepared for what this entails? Am I sure I won’t wake up tomorrow and regret the whole thing? Yes so much doubt, so much insecurity because it is a life times worth of risk for a single shot in the dark, hoping that my aim is true and that the darkness will not lead me afoul.

There is a reason these thoughts are not embraced by others, why they don’t jump at the risk. It makes me wonder, do I know something they don’t? Do I know the secret to success? Or is it my own arrogance that blinds me to a truth I may not wish to accept.

I can only turn to the stars above me, because getting lost in the stars is better than being lost in my own mind. The stars and thoughts in equal numbers but stars dont second guess my every choice so there is less worry in facing them. I pray the answer finds me soon.