True Blood Insults

"Oh please, Jason. You ain't even got sense to pour piss out of a boot" - Sookie Ever been lost for words? Ever wished you had Lafayette on your shoulder dispensing curses and wisdom? Well, wave good bye to l'esprit de l'escalier with True Blood Insults! It's like having your very own pocket Pam.

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Jason, this is a serious operation. It ain't about you getting your pole wet. Dude, do not cockblock me.

Andy and Jason, season 2, episode 11

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Somebody needs to slap that bitch.

Lafayette (about Eric), season 2, episode 11

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You just jealous cos I found love and you know you never will, you fucking freak.

Tara to Lafayette, season 2, episode 11

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William, you are a snob. I hate snobs. Tiny, tiny souls. Or penises. Or both.

Sophie-Ann to Bill, season 2, episode 11

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You could come with me. Maybe meet a nice girl instead of that devil slut. Oh, you're Dirty Harry now, huh? Cos you dipping your penguin dick in that vampire tramp?

(Mad) Maxine to Hoyt, season 2, episode 10

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“Stop trying to rape my brain!”

Tara to Sookie, season 2, episode 10

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She don't need no damn backwoods witch. She need Thorozine and a padded cell.

Lafayette (about Tara), season 2, episode 10

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Suck on that, alien fucker!

Maxine Fortenberry (to Wii baddies), season 2, episode10

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I'm going to crack open your fucking skull, bitch

Maxine Fortenberry (to the aliens on the Wii), season 2, episode 10

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Why don't you offer yourself up to me, Jason Stackhouse, you dirty little monkey?

Maxine Fortenberry (under Maryann's influence) to Jason, season 2, episode 10

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Season 6!

Waiting really does suck, but now it's over! My Monday morning GoT download (I mean, completely legal telly watching system, honest guv) just switches to TB, and all is fine and dandy in the world. Enjoy before me, lucky Americans! Lola Xx

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She's crazy. I mean she's Hannibal Lecter crazy...

Arlene (about Maryann), season 2, episode 10

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It's like New York city or something. People banging their heads on posts, graffiti everywhere, people pissing all over the pavement...

Andy Bellefleur (about Bon Temps), season 2, episode 10

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What a fucking fiasco.

Nan (about the Dallas massacre), season 2, episode 9

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You should thank him. For getting kidnapped? For attracting a suicide bomber? For piss-poor judgement? I think not.

Sookie and Nan (about Godric), season 2, episode 9

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You want to lose your area, viking? - You don't have that kind of power. Hey, I'm on TV. Try me.

Nan Flanagan and Eric, season 2, episode 9

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You ain't a boyfriend. You a domestically violent, sick motherfucker.

Lafayette to Eggs, season 2, episode 9