I donāt know to how to say goodbye to you. If it were anyone else Iād be laughing again by now, moving on. It took me this long to admit it; I donāt know how to cope with losing you. We were never perfect, constantly leaving and coming back, safe in the knowledge that a cry and a chat later, that friendship would still be there. And itās insane, because all those feelings you helped me work through, theyāre all rushing back to me as soon as Iām alone and now I truly am alone. Because you used to be my dream-catcher, and when the voices in my head drove me to insanity Iād call you. I gave so much to our relationship, stifled parts of myself at times just make you stronger. Iād ignore the problems in my own life to comfort you on the problems in yours because I thought you would do the same. And now youāre gone, and I donāt care that Iām acting like 15 year old girl who just lost her first boyfriend, because we were close for 7 years. The pain of losing that doesnāt just vanish.
So I know itās over, I know that for some unknown reason Iām suddenly worth your hatred instead of your love. And Iāve trusted your judgement for so long that your probably right, it was probably my fault.
I know this isnāt the way youāre supposed to react to losing a best friend, and Iām probably showing up all the ways I was āclingyā and 'overemotionalā but no matter what you think I was, I am honest. And this is honestly killing me. Ā
jimmyeatworldofficial
turnnoffyourmind
blakekathryn
gamechangershow
yousharknotpass
theartofmadeline
