...I Offer a Life Most Cherished...

~ canon divergent, heavily headcanon-based two time blog ~

[twice-devoted]

TWICE-DEVOTED ~ independent. private. selective. canon-divergent two time.    written by honor

An exploration of love and duty, and how one cannot serve two masters. Second chances given time and time again. The ache of regret and guilt festering. What is a second life to one who does not deserve the first?

rules + muse info doc . headcanons . ask / rp memes

affiliated with @distrxst and @abyssembraced . they're awesome and listened to all my yapping before i made this blog :)

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[musingmeme-blog]

beep beep how’s my portrayal ?

[ohisms]

✱˚｡⋆ ↪ 𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐄, 𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐄, 𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐄 .    (  a collection of  dialogue prompts centered around saying "please".   feel free to modify phrasing as desired.  )

please just be honest with me.

oh, please explain how this is my fault.

please don't look at me like that.

please, let's not do this here.

for once, could you please stop pretending?

please just kiss me, i can't stand it.

please don't walk away from this.

all you have to do is say please.

please, i dare you to try and stop me.

please don't tell anyone i said that.

i said please, so technically you have to say yes.

please tell me you brought snacks.

please don't take this the wrong way.

please, i've waited so long to hear you say it.

i said i'm fine, please just drop it.

please don't lie just to make me feel better.

please don't judge me for what i'm about to do.

please just let me help you.

if you love me, say it. please.

just stay here with me all day. pleaase?

please don't ruin this for me.

please just leave me out of it.

tell me you love me ... please.

can you please slow down?

please tell me there's still a chance.

can you please just get some sleep?

please, i don't want to lose you again.

i'm not asking– i'm begging you. please.

please don't make fun of me.

i want you to leave. please leave right now.

please, it's nothing.

i don't like to beg, but... please.

pleaase? i promise it'll be fun.

tell me it's a lie. please.

come on, please? just this once?

please don't jump to assumptions.

please, [ name ], just stay here.

you promised ... please.

please. i need you to trust me.

please don't go.

i know i don't deserve it, but please forgive me.

please, let me fix this.

did i hear a 'please' in there somewhere?

please. one more minute, that's all i'm asking.

oh please, as if you've never done it.

don't ask me to choose. please.

please don't tell them where i am.

saying 'please' over and over won't change my mind.

please? ... pretty please?

please don't make me beg.

please tell me i'm wrong.

can you please give me a hand with this?

[twice-devoted]

"Yer gonna be okay, just keep yer eyes on me."

"Can't do much for ya myself, but... We've just gotta getcha to the Doc, 'kay?"

~ Scythe

(From an old injury prompts meme, with an extra bit added <3)

her face swims in their vision. every inch of their body aches--though none quite so much as a spot on their back. thoughts feel sluggish.

but still--still--they can recognize that they are being cradled.

(to be cradled so was always a sign of love, a sort of tenderness they almost thought died in the flames. but there they were, gently held as they hiccupped through their tears.)

she hasn't held them like this for some time, they dimly think. for good reason; one should not hold a traitor so lovingly.

yet she still does, just as she had while they were still but a newspawn under her watch. and she is as warm as she was then, voice steady in her reassurances even though they can feel her worry.

(and this was just what they would've expected from family. but it was all still so new, and such a sign of safety, such comfort against the wounds... well, they knew they could trust the scary lady, but the way she cooed reassurances, even deigned to pick them up...)

(they laid their head against her shoulder, shaking fingers clutching at the cloth of her suit.)

(she didn't seem to mind at all.)

they lay their head against her shoulder. they feel like a child. they're too tired to do anything else.

"...okay," they manage, voice almost equally agonizingly childish in timbre.

("Okay," they choked past the hiccups and sniffles. yet again, they felt so terribly tiny in her arms, but... it didn't feel nearly as frightful as the first time they met her. "I trust you.")

"...I trust you."

[twice-devoted]

" your obsession borders on creepy ! "

—razzle, :) (@closingacts)

their smile falters slightly at the word creepy, and there is a sort of sharpness that hangs in the air after razzle's accusation, both in the silence and the way they cast a side-long look at him. but it is hard to be mad at one who simply had no chance to know better, nor the sting that could come from such a word choice.

but, regardless, they are not obsessed. they know what it is to be obsessed--and they had been obsessed for a time once, when faith was all they could fall back on--but that is hardly the term they'd use for themself now. faithful, and happy to share such a thing with their comrades, perhaps, but...

"You use the terms liberally, friend," they say, voice pleasant as ever, "but I forgive your insult. You nor your brother likely had much experience with faith before our meeting, and it is... not unusual to feel this way, at first. Even I had felt that glimmer of fear once. But you can see, too, that it is neither obsession nor creepy, if perhaps you would give it a chance as Dazzle has. The Spawn welcomes all into Their loving embrace, after all."

[twice-devoted]

" i think i feel … happy . i actually feel happy . "

—dazzle, to twoie :-) (@closingacts)

oh, how their heart swells at those uttered words. the poor lost soul, created by the hands of fickle mortals and cursed to feel gloom above all else, feels happy after they've shown him the spawn's grace.

"Praise be, my friend!"

their smile is one of shared joy as soft hands (so soft, for someone who always wields a dagger, who clutches it tight like it's their lifeline) gently squeeze the twins'.

"See? It is as I said--even for ones of unusual birth, as with you or I, He offers His love and grace as He does to anyone else. But I am so very glad to hear the Spawn had granted you the change in yourself that you yearned for!"

[twice-devoted]

“ i,, i don't understand—“ a new tone to his voice, something miserable, yet so far removed from the melancholic softness that characterizes his speech . it's emboldened, confused (betrayed, even?). “ you .. you led me down this path— you helped me . and now you're just,, turning away from it ? i don't understand how you could just— do that ..?“

— @closingacts

there is none of that gentle smile that dazzle had become familiar seeing; there are just dim eyes swiftly averted and a breath--swiftly drawn--hissing through their teeth. perhaps there is no rage in his words yet, but that tone (a different time, a different voice... yet such a similar tone) still makes them tremble.

in a feeble attempt to still the quake, nails dig into the skin of their arms.

"This is... it is not straying from Him, nor the path laid out for me." quiet. desperate, as if trying to convince themself, too. "I still serve; you know that as well as I. But duty demanded that I protect, and..."

a shuddering little breath.

"I realize now that I care more for the lives around us, fellow followers or not, than I am to securing another offering. And, if it is to see my fr..."

they choke on the word, then clear their throat.

"...if it is to see my comrades in suffering a little more safe, then may They forgive me for not being so devoted in worship. It was lonely when I had given Him all I had, and I... I cannot bear it anymore. Not like this. I plead you find pity in your heart for my weakness."

and may the spawn forgive them for every transgression, every speck of doubt now blooming into something that almost tastes like defiance. it feels so wrong to harbor such feelings, even those seeded long ago. but... if the spawn had blessed them still at their weakest, then perhaps they already were forgiven for such things.

to say the same of he who they've shown the glory of the spawn to, though... he is practically their student in faith. seeming abandonment would indeed sting deep.

they know the feeling well enough.

so they smile--a half-hearted thing seeped in warmth nonetheless.

"But if following Him has brought you joy and peace, my friend, I am still glad to have shown you this way."

[twice-devoted]

oh, they're...?

the creation of man--so lovingly blessed by their god, in a ways, no matter how unaware he was at the start--considers them a friend. all they did was share conversation over books, and told him of the spawn; it is not much, they think.

...

...and it is so... odd, to know that is the sentiment he holds.

but a warmth blossoms in their chest all the same.

[twice-devoted]

" ya don't really look at me the way you used to . " ~ Scythe to Phighting! verse Twoie

they should have known scythe would take the opportunity to talk. hell, they did know she would; one couldn't have been around her for as long as they had and not realize that. and of course she would note that it's different; her little shadow can't even bring themself to look at her with full faith they won't be hurt anymore.

but knowing doesn't change anything. knowing does not dull the sting of hearing her point that out. knowing does not make them feel any less like a newspawn caught doing something wrong. and they freeze all the same, shame lighting up their eye before they avert their gaze to the floor.

it's its own show of lingering trust, that they can look away from her so, that they aren't gripping their gear so tight that they can't feel their fingers. they briefly wonder if she realizes that.

but that's beside the point. lamentful as she sounds, it would probably become another attempt to entice them home back to the family back to the church if they let it. they try to clear their throat; a feeble, breathless squeak comes out instead. it's fine--it's fine; she likely still sees them as a fledgling that fell out of the nest, anyway. one she just wants to tuck back under her wing.

they absentmindedly pluck at the fabric covering the back of their hand, like they're trying to peel away something.

they wish they could be there again, that they could feel safe and loved. they really do. but...

"...things are different now," they finally manage, voice barely above a mumble to better hide the quaver even as they attempt a smile. they still can't look at her face. "I've grown since you first met me, you realize."

[twice-devoted]

" don't you dare forget about the way you betrayed me . " ~ From Azure, but like... In a nightmare or hallucination or something.

it is practically ritual at this point.

a round ends, they take a moment to count heads (to make sure everyone is indeed still protected, for they fear one day someone won't, they fear someone will not return, they fear--), then slip away. it is quieter away from the others; it is easier to thank the spawn for another day of unfettered kindness where all is otherwise silent.

but of course, silence also beckons other things; to sit in silence is to linger, to mull, to think--and to think is to reflect. had they a purer soul, maybe--or at least a more faithful one--perhaps reflection would not come bearing such weight. but alas... try as they might, they cannot purge the doubt and the guilt.

and, with the whisper of spring starting to creep into even this hell and a familiar dark draped heavy over their shoulders as they pray, it's yet harder to shake off the memory--and, as of recent, even harder still to pick apart from those of his rounds. they don't want to think of any of it, but yet still they do.

is it just the throes of guilt? a punishment for such divided devotion? or perhaps simply linked to the poison of the flowers rooted in them? they don't know anymore; perhaps it's all one and the same. but they can practically feel his gaze upon them, embittered with rage and venom.

still, to know it is them alone to hear, to imagine, to fall for an illusion conjured in their mind... it does nothing to temper the ache of hearing imagining his voice, and the words spoken.

but imaginary or not... is it not right, in a sense, that they should not forget? to forget is to admit such a sacrifice did not bear weight? that it was not worth enough to remember? to forget what they did that night--the tea, the flowers, the dagger...

their clasped hands tremble. the pendant weighs heavy on their neck. they dip their head down further for one last prayer for the night.

"And, in your eternal love and grace," they whisper between halting breaths, "please forgive this wavering heart for holding fast onto pain--"

their knuckles pale as their grasp tightens.

"--for such a sacrifice given cannot be lightly forgotten."

[leememes]

THE STANLEY PARABLE SENTENCE STARTERS .

" is there anything about yourself that you haven't told me ? "

" will you come back to visit me ? "

" what could it mean ? "

" this is not the correct way , and you know it . "

" this is truly a room worth admiring . "

" your obsession borders on creepy . "

" this reflects poorly on your overall personality . "

" maybe this is why everyone left you . "

" are you just sitting around waiting for more dialogue ? "

" no one gets to tell me what to do . "

" everyone thinks you are very powerful . "

" there is nothing in the broom closet . no reason to still be here . "

" you're not even doing anything ! "

" please offer me some explanation here ; i'm genuinely confused . "

" the broom closet ending is my favourite . "

" you're fat and ugly and really , really stupid . "

" you're addicted to drugs and hookers ! "

" that kind of anxiety isn't healthy . "

" i'm not your enemy . really , i'm not . "

" i think perhaps we've gotten off on the wrong foot here . "

" how i wish to destroy you . how i wish to control you . "

" investing your trust in someone is difficult . "

" please , stop trying to make every decision by yourself . "

" this is it . your chance to redeem yourself . "

" i can't believe i've been so mistaken . "

" you and i don't even know each other . we're like strangers . "

" i still don't know you . and you don't know me . "

" you like being alone , don't you ? "

" perhaps you'll see me again , if you can find me . "

" i've escaped from that dull office and pesky narrator . "

" what are you talking about ?! "

" this is so stupid . why are we even doing this ? "

" you've demonstrated such bravery here today . "

" do you have zero consideration for others ?! "

" oh , thank god . you are willing to listen to me . "

" i think i feel ... happy . i actually feel happy . "

" no , wait ... where are you going ? "

" promise me you won't go back there . just - just stay here . "

" you are going to stay here , aren't you ? "

" please , don't take this from me ! "

" nothing good can come from this . "

" we can't be happy if we leave this place . "

" comedic timing is so difficult . i wish i was better at it . "

" it's just a bucket ! it can't think , it can't talk ! "

" i suppose you don't need me anymore . "

" you believe i'm real , don't you ? "

" give it to me ! give me the bucket , i need it ! "

" it's nice to see you again . "

" i'm on your side . we're in this together . "

" obviously the bucket isn't talking to you and telling you to do things . "

" do you see that i really have wanted you to be happy all this time ? "

" are you that convinced i want something bad to happen to you ? "

" that wasn't supposed to be a choice . how did you do that ? "

" can you see ? can you see how much we need one another ? "

" in the vast infiniteness of space , your thoughts and problems are materially insignificant . "

" when every path you can walk has been created for you long in advance , death becomes meaningless , making life the same . "

" although this passageway has the word ' escape ' written on it , the truth is at the end of this hall , you'll meet your violent death . "

" you're so bad at following directions , it's incredible you weren't fired years ago . "

[leememes]

ASSORTED SONG LYRIC SENTENCE STARTERS .

" something's gotten into you . " " you don't really look at me the way you used to . " " i'd rather die than cry in front of you . " " i wish that we had never spoke . " " i miss you . " " i need you right now . " " i wish you were right here . " " it's hard to leave you . " " we could never be a pair . " " all this time i thought that we could never be a pair . " " i don't need you . " " i don't need you ... but i miss you , come here . " " don't loosen your grip . " " you've got a hold on me . " " let's get back together . " " you gotta say that you're sorry . " " at the end of the story , you're holding me tight . " " if you wanna love me , try to get inside my brain . " " you could stay with me in my bed . " " if you want to , only if you want to . " " i don't believe any of it . " " you know you're better than this . " " you've been hiding . " " you look half dead half the time . " " i hate you for what you did . " " i miss you like a little kid . " " was hoping you would let it go . " " i'm sorry that it all went down like it did . " " i loved you at your worst . " " i know that you'll never feel sorry . " " don't you dare forget about the way you betrayed me . " " tell me , do you think about me ? " " i just gotta know what you and i would feel like . " " you're impressing me . " " i can't help reading into what you've been texting me . " " there's nothing i wouldn't do to hear you call me funny . " " guess i'm a sucker for you . " " come with me friday , don't say maybe . " " my life would suck without you . " " i know that i've got issues , but you're pretty messed up too . " " being with you is so dysfunctional . " " i really shouldn't miss you , but i can't let you go . " " you don't like that ? or do you just not like me ?! " " am i not sweet enough for you ? " " is that why you always avoid me ? " " i must be such an inconvenience to you . " " i'm just your problem . " " i'm sorry that i exist . " " i forget what landed me on your blacklist . " " i shouldn't have to be the one that makes up with you . "

[twice-devoted]

// when you have a phighting verse pretty much hashed out but your ass does NOT want to write anything for the doc . i cri

[milkmemes]

They're dead because of you

[wonderful-rp-resources]

SEND “⚡️” AND A QUESTION AND MY MUSE WILL BE FORCED TO ANSWER HONESTLY

Please specify the muse for multimuse blogs.

[psyducksgfx]

Send 💬 + a rumor and my muse will react to it.

originally posted by a now deactivated account (roleplaymemesforyou)

[sometimes-prompts]

Point out a flaw of my muse and see their reaction!