Some thoughts on kakayama
So one thing that I’ve found over my time in this fandom is that a lot of people enjoy Yamato as a sub. (I usually call him Tenzou because it’s a name given with love, whereas Yamato is a mission, but I want to make it clear I’m talking about him as an adult, post ANBU.) Personally, I see him as someone who’s entire life has been devoted to others against his will. Yamato is just coming into himself, discovering that not only does he have an identity, but he gets to choose it. He has discovered that he has a will and he can impose it on others, and I think that not only does he get a little thrill over having control, he especially resents giving up control, at least outside of work, within his own safe spaces. He likes making choices.
I also don’t see him as an aggressive dom because even though I think he enjoys having control, I imagine he has issues with taking control from others, because that’s happened to him his whole life. Which is why Kakayama works so well. Kakashi clearly does not enjoy responsibility. He feels like when he is in control (captain), things go to shit. So he doesn’t want control in his free time. It weighs heavily enough on him during work. So Kakashi is happy to give up control, to just throw it away and say, “here, you take it.” And Yamato is happy to take control when it is given up freely.
I don’t see Yamato as a pure dom though. Again, he doesn’t get off on taking control, but on having it. And he also doesn’t like to cause pain. I think that’s very difficult for him, even in play, because hurting people is so deeply tied to his life in ROOT and in ANBU, where he was controlled by others. But I also think that he would do it, if asked because he is a people pleaser at heart who enjoys pleasing others. So taking all of this into account, I see him as a service top and occasional service dom (when asked).
As for Kakashi, I think we can all agree that he has a lot of guilt and self hatred. He’s also really bad at dealing with his emotions in a healthy way. So in addition to giving up control because he hates the pressure (and also probably because he enjoys being lazy lol), I can also see him engaging in sadomasochism if the opportunity arrives. And with Yamato, he does have the opportunity, because Yamato is someone he trusts, completely and fully. I also think Yamato gets off on being trusted. Not only does he have control, but Kakashi submitting to him means Kakashi (whose opinion matters a LOT) thinks that Yamato is GOOD at being in control, and thus good at Being A Person
As for gender and aesthetics, I also prefer Yamato with short hair, because that’s representative of his ability to make choices for himself. He’s realized that not only does he have a gender, but he can choose it. Cutting his hair is a definite show of control both over his body, and other people’s perceptions of him.
I like buff yams because I also see that as an aspect of his gaining control over his identity. His body isn’t just something that can be used against him; it’s something he can control and affect. It’s something that can serve him. It’s something that he can showcase and say “that’s me”.
I’m cool with trans Yam, but I think it’s kind of difficult to pin him down with that terminology because if you want to think of him as ftm, you have to realize that he never really was female either, or was pressured/led to believe he was female, because he was never led to believe he was human. He wouldn’t be transitioning from female to male (which is iffy terminology on its own, I realize) but from a thing to a human male. @mokutone has some absolutely amazing thoughts about this on their blog. I remember them touching on how even if Yamato is male, was born male, and has always presented as male, he still represents transness in a very unique way. So I’m not really sure if I headcanon him as being trans in a generalized way, but I also don’t think making the distinction really matters, because he is discovering and adopting maleness into his identity no matter how you approach it.
I do see both Kakashi and Yamato as gay, though Kakashi also has a lot of asexual aspects to him, at least in canon. (He is pretty clearly allosexual in fsra lol) I am conflicted about if his a sexuality is natural, or a result of trauma affecting his ability to form relationships with people or see his body as an extension of himself instead of a tool he uses.
Neither man has any quality m/f relationships with someone their own age in canon (excluding boruto because idk boruto). Kakashi did supposedly have a relationship with that one woman, but in the flashback where she kisses him, he doesn’t respond. If anything he seemed shocked and confused. In their real time reunion, he tries to avoid her. He behaves very much like a closeted gay man who doesn’t know how to escape a woman’s attraction. Which I found especially interesting, because he has used his face to woo Ayame at the Ramen shop. It’s a very strange moment though, because he doesn’t seem to have any intentions towards her. It really does seem like he’s using his pretty face to get special treatment at his favorite restaurant and nothing more.
Of course, if we’re talking canon, all of this should probably looked at with the understanding that Kishimoto cannot write women and he especially struggles to write women in proper m/f relationships (I say this as a multi shipper who also enjoys m/f pairings - I have to do a lot of the legwork to make the relationships appealing in naruto. I usually don’t ship Naruto women based on their canon selves, but on their potential selves if they had been written well).
All that being said, kishimoto created some of the worst canon ships imaginable, so actually, fuck his opinion and fuck canon. They’re gay.
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