well

im audrey

[yigah-moved-deactivated20181217]

powerful energies to ward off negativity in 2018

[animedads-deactivated20210108]

In gonna replace every bone in my body with a knife, if someone punches me they’re in for a surprise (the knife)

[lesserjoke]

Reblog this post with your weirdest ancestor’s name.

I had a great-grandfather named Kermit Dickman.

[wuqs]

why did you start a competition that you’ve already won

[gokusupersaiyan999999999999999]

[black-eye-friday]

[uhaudrey]

me [searching the beach with my child]: sorry honey, doesn't look like there's any sand dollars left

child: can't the ocean just make more of them?

me: and cause inflation? destroy the sand economy? jesus christ Tiffany, use your head

[twitterlols]

[pendejx-deactivated20200323]

[endofeva1997]

[jphcrk-deactivated20251128]

View this post on Instagram

[gaydad2008]

Me walking into McDonalds at 2:17am after drinking 4.35 vodka crans

[uhaudrey]

dad: why are you drinking coffee at 10pm?

me: time is an illusion. once you realize that, you can transcend, and live in bliss

me: *takes sip*

me: also i have a 10 page paper due in the morning that i haven't started

[vanish]

[baby-coma-deactivated20191025]

[beyonslayed]

Not to sound anti vegan but what is one ecological function performed by roaches because I’m not entirely sure we need them

[altonzm-deactivated20170213]

they’re a part of the food chain & they help with the breaking down of forest-floor discarded foliage (cockroaches feed on fallen leaves/discarded branches and bark, and are then fed on in turn by everything from other insects to birds & small mammals)

[beyonslayed]

Ain’t no forest floor discarded foliage in my house tho so why they here

[stimful-gifts]

View this post on Instagram

[bittiest]

Try eating Cheetos with those lips… I think not.

[neverthere12345]

[shitty-car-mods-daily]

[wastedawayagaininmargaritaville]

Why is this on shitty car mods? This is revolutionary

[plasmalogical]

becomes extremely enlightened when my airbag deploys and pushes all of these into the exact center of my brain

[soulsearcher33]

View this post on Instagram

Cancel eyebrows

[kidkendoll-deactivated20240714]

Not my Christian house