No matter how hard i try deep down i feel completely trapped in this shell of a body that was tainted so many years ago. I feel alone, so alone that my heart aches. I have my husband and im so happy for that. hes my only world, including my few friends that i have on facebook. Cristina is one of my good friends who i can show my real self around Kris is the same, Kyle and Kassidy both of them too, i feel like i can be myself.I am hurting so much and yet i put on a smile and encourage people to fight through their pain and find something that they can smile towards in their life. I should take my own advice huh? Someone like me blessed with such wonderful friends, Im lucky, but at the same time, i feel like i take them for granted. Am i a bad person..? Do i make them upset? I want to make all my friends happy, I also want to escape the pain i went through from my bastard piece of shit dad. I want to keep hanging on to that hope that i have but sometimes i feel like its fading away. Am i crazy? Have I lost sight of myself? I cry because I wish i could forget the painful memories, I cry because I don’t want to hurt my friends when im in pain, im afraid i’ll hurt them and make them leave, i dont want to lose anyone. especially.. myself. Please let me survive please let me keep hanging onto my hope. the last thing i ever want to do is abandon my husband, my friends and my family [dad and brother excluded from this]
jacobvanloon
tangentwithtanner
pixelskylines
andulkaphoto
